mmmm. crunchy.

May 22, 2001 11:03 AM

mmmm. crunchy. i wonder if the woman will be charged with anything? i wonder if she's liable for anything? in a nation where predators sue their prey when they fight back, anything's possible, i suppose...
posted by fuzzygeek (15 comments total)

well, we do know he won't do it again. (ahem... well, we do know he can't do it again.)
posted by benjh at 11:12 AM on May 22, 2001

"My rape victim ate my balls?" That's so...over.
posted by luser at 11:30 AM on May 22, 2001

how would an officer react when a woman walks in and drops a bloody, gnawed on scrotum on the front desk?
posted by tolkhan at 11:37 AM on May 22, 2001

Man, she's got a lot of balls.
posted by ericost at 11:38 AM on May 22, 2001

Though I've never eaten them, I don't think I'd ever describe my testicles as "crunchy." I'd imagine they'd feel more like eating two cherry tomatoes in a sausage casing.
posted by Awol at 11:39 AM on May 22, 2001

"How can I help you, Senator Clinton?"

Man, I even like the Clintons. I just couldn't resist.
posted by luser at 11:39 AM on May 22, 2001

Q: what is a more effective rape deterent than pepper-spray?

A: your teeth.

i say congratulations to the woman. if more women were able to do this, maybe men would think twice before an attempted rape.

could this move be taught in high schools? the scrotum gnash? (i hate to say it but it almost sounds like a wwf move.)
posted by kzam at 12:02 PM on May 22, 2001

All I want to know is- does she have braces, cause that would REALLY hurt.
posted by crackheadmatt at 12:10 PM on May 22, 2001

Crackheadmatt: relative to the pain of having your testicles bitten off? i don't think so!
posted by pnevares at 12:24 PM on May 22, 2001

"Doctors were unable to reattach his testicles, hospital spokeswoman Sandra Wilks said."

Oh yeah. You know how when you are watching E.R. and the doctors spend 40 minutes performing CPR, even after their patient is obviously dead? I'm sure it was just like that in the E.R. with the would-be rapist. I bet the doctors spent not more than 40 seconds in the operating room trying to re-attach those testicles. And the gene pool breathes a sigh of relief.
posted by mg at 12:39 PM on May 22, 2001

Good for her! (thirteen passes out)
posted by thirteen at 12:43 PM on May 22, 2001

Could this be filed as a Darwin Honorable Mention? I think so.


Ya know I can post on this all day.
posted by crackheadmatt at 12:55 PM on May 22, 2001

That woman should get a medal. That is perfect justice for the guy. She should have bit his balls off then stuffed them in his mouth.
posted by a3matrix at 1:39 PM on May 22, 2001

the thing I dont get.. if all he wanted is a blowjob its $60 on a city streetcorner.. Why pick some stranger whos gonna eat your balls and throw you in jail?
posted by stbalbach at 2:07 PM on May 22, 2001

He wasn't trying to get a blowjob, he was raping her.

I seriously doubt she'll be charged with anything, though, since it was self-defense. The guy could concievably sue her, though.
posted by RylandDotNet at 3:07 PM on May 22, 2001