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February 18, 2009 7:50 PM   Subscribe


 
Oh yeah? Then why can't my Xbox join the MeFight TF2 servers?
posted by Science! at 7:53 PM on February 18, 2009 [1 favorite]


Aww, that last one, with the Dreamcast, is just adorable.
posted by box at 7:59 PM on February 18, 2009 [4 favorites]


OK, the Dreamcast one floored me.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 8:01 PM on February 18, 2009


This is my new TF2 spray.
posted by hellojed at 8:01 PM on February 18, 2009


aww PS3, you might not have a lot of games, but you've got Metal Gear and that's what matters.
posted by dunkadunc at 8:06 PM on February 18, 2009


awww PS3 - you have LBP and that's all the kids and I need...
posted by jkaczor at 8:12 PM on February 18, 2009


aww PS3, you might not have a lot of games, but you've got Metal Gear Little Big Planet and that's what matters.
posted by jabberjaw at 8:12 PM on February 18, 2009


I don't play video games much anymore (8-bit 4evar), but I'm really glad this exists.
posted by tepidmonkey at 8:25 PM on February 18, 2009


Officially?
posted by blue_beetle at 8:26 PM on February 18, 2009


Awww, PS3 you might not have a lot of games but you have Blu-Ray and that's all I need.
posted by Brainy at 8:46 PM on February 18, 2009


Awww PS3, you might not have a lot of games, but you also don't have the games I want and that's what matters.
posted by Lemurrhea at 8:53 PM on February 18, 2009 [10 favorites]


...the ill xbox 360 on the bed was pretty hilarious, even though recently I had a nice chat with Microsoft on the phone regarding my current (second, possibly soon to be third) 360's condition of E74 (only one red light)... the story is that this machine was the replacement for my first ring of death casualty, a year and 2 months after I got it, E74 shows up, which is not covered in the red ring of death extended warranty. I'm still too furious to figure out what to do. So it's nice to see all the video game kids getting along while I want to throw my 360 out the window.
posted by rainman84 at 9:04 PM on February 18, 2009


Officially?

Netcraft confirms it.
posted by cortex at 9:07 PM on February 18, 2009 [6 favorites]


rainman84: "...the ill xbox 360 on the bed was pretty hilarious, even though recently I had a nice chat with Microsoft on the phone regarding my current (second, possibly soon to be third) 360's condition of E74 (only one red light)... the story is that this machine was the replacement for my first ring of death casualty, a year and 2 months after I got it, E74 shows up, which is not covered in the red ring of death extended warranty. I'm still too furious to figure out what to do. So it's nice to see all the video game kids getting along while I want to throw my 360 out the window."

If you're willing to fib a bit, just tell them that it had a typical three red ring death. The warranty programs has become nearly no-questions-asked so long as you tell MS that. There's been lots of chatter online about people with non-rrod problems getting their console fixed, with few counterexamples.
posted by aerotive at 9:09 PM on February 18, 2009


awww Dreamcast, you might be 64 bits behind, but you have Toy Commander and that's what matters.
posted by clearly at 10:03 PM on February 18, 2009 [4 favorites]


Aww stick and rock, you may be outside, but you're cheap and have unlimited replay value, and that's all that matters.
posted by not_on_display at 11:24 PM on February 18, 2009 [8 favorites]


Dreamcast is still hooked up to my living room TV. Chu-Chu Rocket anyone?
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 12:03 AM on February 19, 2009 [2 favorites]


How is it a console with hundreds of titles "has no games"? Am I missing something about the definition of "no"?
posted by grubi at 12:13 AM on February 19, 2009


Enough of this wasting time reading comments, I need to check on my "Caution: Seaman", followed by hours wasted by NesterDC SE.

/best $30 bucks console, keyboard, games and mic ever.
posted by broken wheelchair at 1:31 AM on February 19, 2009 [1 favorite]


I miss you, Dreamcast-kun. ;_;
posted by Faint of Butt at 3:19 AM on February 19, 2009


I thought this was going to be about the DSi.
posted by Rhomboid at 3:34 AM on February 19, 2009


Considering that these comics include both a broken 360 and a PS3 that's sad about having no games I don't think that the wars are over at all. Still, adorable.
posted by The Devil Tesla at 3:51 AM on February 19, 2009


How is it a console with hundreds of titles "has no games"? Am I missing something about the definition of "no"?

Any game that has been released for multiple consoles is discounted. When people talk about a console having "no games," they mean "games that would persuade someone to choose it over another." Therefore, they really mean "no exclusive games." Furthermore, shitty games are discounted. It doesn't matter if there are exclusives, if the exclusives suck.

Nintendo eked out a living between their successes with the SNES and Wii by having amazing, must-play exclusives in their first-party franchises such as Mario and Zelda. On the other hand, the PS3's two big exclusives have been Little Big Planet and Metal Gear Solid 4. The former turned out to be a bit of a disappointment, and the latter, a continuation of a downward spiral into confusing storylines that may or may not be mocking the consumer.

In short, the price of a PS3 is pretty steep as it offers precious little over the Xbox or Wii, and the exclusives for those consoles generally outshine the possibility to play overpriced Blue DVDs. Especially since you can Netflix with the Xbox now.
posted by explosion at 4:34 AM on February 19, 2009 [3 favorites]


LBP was a disappointment? Why? And is it for sure exclusive? That's the one game I wish I could play on my Wii.
posted by DU at 4:54 AM on February 19, 2009


Oh come on, the PS3 has had a lot more big exclusives than just LBP and MGS4. Uncharted and Valkyria Chronicles comes to mind, as well as the rather good selection on Playstation Network. There isn't the ridiculous wealth of great games that the PS2 had, but it's still rather essential. Ars explains the this rather well here.
posted by The Devil Tesla at 5:35 AM on February 19, 2009


People, no more arguing! The console wars are over. They're BFFs for chrissakes!
posted by Rock Steady at 5:43 AM on February 19, 2009 [1 favorite]


*Grabs the nearest console and gives it a deep smooch*
posted by drezdn at 5:51 AM on February 19, 2009 [1 favorite]


Oh, the console wars aren't over yet. I hear there's something coming out that you'll plug into your Intellivision, and then your Intellivision will talk. I think they call it the 32x.
posted by box at 5:54 AM on February 19, 2009 [1 favorite]


Note to self: Next time I go home to parent's house, find Dreamcast and give it a hug. I miss you, buddy! *sniff*
posted by gc at 6:57 AM on February 19, 2009


I never would have experienced Shenmue without the DreamCast....RIP little buddy.
posted by samsara at 6:58 AM on February 19, 2009 [1 favorite]


come back dreamcast
all is forgiven
*sniff*
posted by Spatch at 8:23 AM on February 19, 2009


Awwww... *pours out a Mountain Dew for the Pong game that he won from a subscription drive on his paper route back in the mid-70s* See you at the crossroads, homie.
posted by Halloween Jack at 9:07 AM on February 19, 2009 [1 favorite]


Awww, Nintendo DS and Sony PSP. You may not have the raw power of non-portable consoles, but I can play pirated games on you and that's what matters.
posted by shmegegge at 9:26 AM on February 19, 2009 [1 favorite]


Seriously, though, the Dreamcast was the fucking bomb. I challenge anyone who feels differently to Power Stone at dawn.
posted by shmegegge at 9:27 AM on February 19, 2009


I love the dreamcast. I had a friend who had two dreamcasts with twinsticks and link and two tvs for playing virtual on oratio tangram. He was way too good at the game for it to even be fun playing against him but his basement in 2000 was more like the future than anywhere I've ever been.
posted by I Foody at 9:32 AM on February 19, 2009


If you're willing to fib a bit, just tell them that it had a typical three red ring death. The warranty programs has become nearly no-questions-asked so long as you tell MS that. There's been lots of chatter online about people with non-rrod problems getting their console fixed, with few counterexamples.

If you've got nothing to lose, you could also wrap your 360 in a towel and leave it on for a bit, thereby giving it the RRoD. Microsoft's shoddy initial production run has inadvertently created one of the best consoles "warranties" ever. Of course, it doesn't compare to Nintendo's "It won't break ... EVER" mantra, but it beats the pants off Sony's handling of disk-read errors last gen.
posted by Amanojaku at 9:37 AM on February 19, 2009


the PS3 has had a lot more big exclusives than just LBP and MGS4.

It has the new Ratchet and Clank and for that reason alone I've seriously considered getting one. I don't fully understand my boundless love for that franchise, but I'm willing to admit that it exists.
posted by quin at 9:38 AM on February 19, 2009


It will have God of War 3, too.

The PS3's biggest hurdle right now is price. It's really hard to justify paying 200 bucks more for a console that doesn't really offer a different experience than the 360.
posted by graventy at 10:00 AM on February 19, 2009


There isn't the ridiculous wealth of great games that the PS2 had, but it's still rather essential. Ars explains the this rather well here.

Those are all good points. But the problem is, does the most expensive console ever sold (except, I suppose, for the Neo Geo) justify its price with a decent library of games to choose from, or does it simply have a small library of games to play even if you play every single one of them? The point I'm getting at, here, is that the list of Sony's must-have exclusives has finally reached the point where I wouldn't have to ask "well, I just beat Uncharted, so now what do I play?" But what it doesn't have is a list that's robust enough for any old dude to be able to pick and choose according to his tastes. Just because you love Resistance 2, for instance, doesn't mean you're going to love Flower. Now, Ars makes a great point of explaining that the system is a must buy if you're a hardcore gamer, which is likely true. But even hardcore gamers don't all love the same games, and that list of games is of such variety that you couldn't make a case for all of them to any one individual gamer unless that gamer has an eclectic taste in games. And that is a serious problem in today's market.

For myself, I think it's a stellar machine, and the library of games has reached precisely the saturation point that I could ask for to justify its purchase... IF money were no object. But money IS an object, and that's the mistake Sony made. It was an odd mistake for them to make since it's precisely the mistake Nintendo made with the N64 that allowed them to take over the game market with the PSX years ago, back when they made the cheapest console with the most extensive exclusive library.

And believe me, this pains me to say. I've been a fan of Metal Gear since the 8 bit NES days, and the latest releases in the series are among my favorite games of all time. Further, I've been looking forward to Little Big Planet since I first heard about it. I won't get to play any of these games unless the console price comes down considerably, and not just that paltry $50 token drop consoles often use.
posted by shmegegge at 10:48 AM on February 19, 2009 [2 favorites]


shmegegge, you can complain, I'll keep playing the 40 games I own for the PS3. (most of which aren't exclusives, but why should that make any difference to me?)

I'd feel seriously left out had I never played Uncharted, MGS4, or LBP. (or R&C for that matter)

And me likey Time Crisis 4. I just wish the two player wasn't split screen. It's such a waste.
posted by wierdo at 11:09 AM on February 19, 2009


shmegegge, you can complain, I'll keep playing the 40 games I own for the PS3. (most of which aren't exclusives, but why should that make any difference to me?)

It shouldn't, and I'm not complaining. What I'm trying to do is explain a trend in console sales from the position of someone who understands first hand what a lot of potential PS3 buyers are thinking. There's a lot of talk, and that Ars article is a perfect example of it, about this idea that the PS3 is a must buy, the way folks have tended to own most if not all of the major consoles of a generation in the past. What I'm getting at is NOT that PS3 owners made a bad purchase. What I'm getting at is that 360 owners don't have the luxury of owning a 360, a Wii and a PS3 the way we used to own a Playstation 2, an Xbox and a Gamecube last generation. The potential buyers have a higher percentage in the "old enough to have a job and buy my own consoles" demographic, rather than mostly being "young enough to ask for my consoles for christmas" demographic. On top of that, these consoles are more expensive. The Xbox was considered outrageously priced when it came out, despite being sold at a loss. It was $299. Think about that. The current price for a 360 with a hard drive is a significant price drop from its original price, and considered a steal at the same price. The Playstation 3 is still 100 dollars more, new. Things are financially difficult for everyone right now, but the past 8 years have seen considerable belt tightening for everyone even before the current crisis. For many people, owning all 3, or even just 2 of these was, is and will continue to be prohibitively expensive.

The problem is that we're late enough into this generation that people made their choice, already. And although PS3 owners have been richly rewarded for their faith in Sony, a significant portion of that reward has been in the past 6 months, and almost all of it has been from the past year. (Bear in mind that Killzone 2, the system's great savior, still isn't even out.)

So sure, I feel left out for not having played Uncharted and MGS4. But I made my choice 2 years ago, when it wasn't really a choice at all and Sony had nothing in favor of their console over the other 2. Most people are in my position.

So what I'm getting at is that for most people the question isn't "Has Sony finally gotten enough games to warrant a purchase?" For most people the question is "Has Sony finally gotten enough games that, outside of the non-exclusives I already own for the 360, I can justify spending $400 on it, when I've already got a 360?" It's a different and difficult question, even if you love the Playstation franchise and desperately want those games.
posted by shmegegge at 12:31 PM on February 19, 2009 [1 favorite]


Maybe the console wars are over if the only negativity we can muster is that the most expensive console may be too expensive. That's true, and it may matter when it comes to sales, but when it comes to the actual worth of the system it really doesn't matter. Great things are great.

So you can't think of a reason to buy it, shmegegge. So don't buy it.
posted by The Devil Tesla at 1:58 PM on February 19, 2009 [1 favorite]


NES was still better than Sega, though.

*twirls rectangular controller over head menacingly*
posted by cortex at 2:13 PM on February 19, 2009 [1 favorite]


Jet Grind Radio, motherfuckers.

Raising my glass to your beautiful memory, my old friend, my Dreamcast.
posted by voltairemodern at 2:41 PM on February 19, 2009 [1 favorite]


So you can't think of a reason to buy it, shmegegge. So don't buy it.

You sure? Would that be ok with you? What if I said (for instance, in my previous two comments) that I could think of reasons to buy it, and that I really wish I could afford to? Would it still be ok with you if I didn't because I can't?
posted by shmegegge at 2:55 PM on February 19, 2009


I don't really have a dog in this fight, but, the longer it goes on, the more I want to just jump in and start swinging.
posted by box at 3:37 PM on February 19, 2009 [1 favorite]


Zero punctuation on Little Big Planet.
posted by blenderfish at 7:47 PM on February 19, 2009


I don't really have a dog in this fight, but, the longer it goes on, the more I want to just jump in and start swinging.

Since I could only afford two of the main consoles, that probably makes me a PS3 hater. So if you wanna be a fanboy, we can fight.
posted by graventy at 7:53 PM on February 19, 2009


What if I said (for instance, in my previous two comments) that I could think of reasons to buy it, and that I really wish I could afford to?

You have my permission to not buy it :p.
posted by The Devil Tesla at 4:58 AM on February 20, 2009


Hmm. Well, it's going to require a little debate-team-style flexibility, but let me give it a shot:

You haters just don't appreciate the PS3 because you've spent more time with Mario than you have with your own fathers! If you poverty-stricken chumps saw how nice that off-road-driving game (you know the one--it was a launch title) looks on my HDTV with the 7.1 surround sound, you'd go out and get a second job! When you consider that a separate Blu-Ray player is pretty ludicrously overpriced as well, the PS3 looks like a bargain! The PS3 has more processing power, which really comes in handy when you're porting an Xbox 360 game! PS3's the wave of the future, because Sony has a really great track record with those!
posted by box at 5:51 AM on February 20, 2009 [2 favorites]


Nicely played, box. +1.

Enough of this wasting time reading comments, I need to check on my "Caution: Seaman", followed by hours wasted by NesterDC SE.

The timing here is suspecious: I just dragged my Dreamcast out tonight (only to find I've misplaced the video cable, grr). I'm getting the suspicion that Metafilter is INSIDE MY BRAIN.

While the Dreamcast has been surpassed in the cheap, easy TV emulation sweepstakes by the Wii (it has excellent emulators for NES, SNES, Genesis, TG16, Lynx, Atari 2600 AND 800/5200, meaning 4-player M.U.L.E. woo!), but you don't even need to burn a disk to play 'em, just pop them onto a SD card.

Add in Virtual Console, and it becomes arguably the system that can play the most games of all time. That's not a PC, of course.

I'm not entirely certain of that last paragraph, but the way I see it, if someone proves me wrong it'll be entertaining to see his reasoning, so like, win/win.
posted by JHarris at 9:06 PM on February 21, 2009


Er... I lost my train of thought while writing that last comment....

While the Dreamcast has been surpassed by the etc etc, it's still great. Typing of the Dead is still unequaled.
posted by JHarris at 9:07 PM on February 21, 2009


While the Dreamcast has been surpassed by the etc etc, it's still great.

Indeed. Even after playing Xbox 360, then going back to the Dreamcast, I'm always surprised at just how well the graphics still hold up. If anyone is too poor for a new system, they can't go wrong by dropping $100 for a Dreamcast and a stack of games on eBay or a local store.
posted by Fuzzy Skinner at 10:55 AM on February 22, 2009 [1 favorite]


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