THAT'S NOT FAIR!
March 11, 2009 12:45 PM   Subscribe

 
I blame my mother.
posted by Ogre Lawless at 12:52 PM on March 11, 2009


She was awesomely weird in Cremaster 3.
posted by Science! at 12:53 PM on March 11, 2009 [1 favorite]


Her prosthetics don't appear to give her supernatural web design abilities.
posted by gurple at 12:54 PM on March 11, 2009 [6 favorites]


What would R Crumb say?
posted by Spatch at 1:01 PM on March 11, 2009 [1 favorite]


Capability to propel owner at faster speeds =! Better.

Making her faster is just one small thing her legs do better. The ability to grow five inches is pretty sweet as well.
posted by Bookhouse at 1:02 PM on March 11, 2009


I had a snarky, lulzy comment all typed up and previewed and ready to post, and then I said to myself "What the hell is wrong with you, dersins?" and quickly hit [Command-A] and [delete].
posted by dersins at 1:02 PM on March 11, 2009 [8 favorites]


I also deleted dersins' comment.
posted by Astro Zombie at 1:03 PM on March 11, 2009 [6 favorites]


Her talk was fucking awesome.

Sometimes people need to just say their comment in their head and move on. MetaFilter is fucking lame sometimes.
posted by chunking express at 1:05 PM on March 11, 2009


Same boat here, dersins. I just realized I am jealous of somebody for having kick-ass artificial limbs. What kind of a jackass is jealous of somebody's artificial limbs?

they are pretty sweet though
posted by Shepherd at 1:05 PM on March 11, 2009 [1 favorite]


I always thought that, if I were to lose my legs, I'd go live on the ISS or a similar low-gravity environment. Aimee just gave me a lot more options....
posted by DreamerFi at 1:05 PM on March 11, 2009


I replaced dersins' comment with a replacement computer-designed and built with polycarbonates and carbon fiber leaf springs. It will perform better than any non-augmented human comment.
posted by ardgedee at 1:07 PM on March 11, 2009 [2 favorites]


I would like to see this FPP redone with a hyperlink on the word "you," just for the sake of completeness.
posted by etc. at 1:07 PM on March 11, 2009


"She graduated from Georgetown University in 1998 with a dual degree in history and diplomacy"

Dang, that sounds like fun. Neat lady.
posted by peggynature at 1:09 PM on March 11, 2009


What would R Crumb say?

I think he'd be very open to the possibilities for creative augmentation.

I met Aimee at a (different) conference once, and spent a good half hour talking to her about all sorts of things, including conventional models of beauty and form. And pizza. And some other things I've forgotten about.

I didn't really know who she was or realize she had anything other than pedestrian-type legs until much later.

Anyway, in real life she is.... really fucking cool, yeah.
posted by rokusan at 1:09 PM on March 11, 2009 [2 favorites]


I was just telling my husband last night that if I'd had the smarts or the discipline for it, I would have really enjoyed designing prosthetics. I think some of the things they're doing now are just amazing.

I think she's beautiful. If I were in her situation, I hope I'd have half the confidence and the sense of playfulness she does.
posted by Evangeline at 1:10 PM on March 11, 2009


You.
posted by peggynature at 1:10 PM on March 11, 2009 [2 favorites]


Ugly, poorly-spoken double amputees don't seem to get much press though.
posted by GuyZero at 1:12 PM on March 11, 2009 [1 favorite]


He say you "Bladerunner"...
posted by loquacious at 1:13 PM on March 11, 2009 [2 favorites]


Of course she has better legs than I do. She has a wider variety to choose from.

I've been told I have lovely calves.
posted by BitterOldPunk at 1:17 PM on March 11, 2009 [1 favorite]


I was sad because I had no shoes until I met a woman who had no feet. Then she beat me in the 200-meter dash. Now I'm really depressed.
posted by twoleftfeet at 1:21 PM on March 11, 2009 [17 favorites]


she pretty
posted by leotrotsky at 1:23 PM on March 11, 2009


Just imagining how much fatter I'd be if I didn't have the legs to walk to the fridge to get another Coke makes me sad.
posted by You Should See the Other Guy at 1:28 PM on March 11, 2009


After gnashing my teeth with envy at her awesome prosthetics, I decided that the only way I could be as cool was to get my own.

Unfortunately, the doctors at the hospital said it would be irresponsible of them to amputate my legs just so I could run faster and look more bad ass.

The stupid fuckers.

I guess I'll have to settle for these Stiltwerks Velocity Motion stilts.

Not nearly as awesome, but still pretty slick.
posted by quin at 1:41 PM on March 11, 2009


I once saw her speak after a showing of Cremaster 3 and someone in the audience asked her if her legs were real.
posted by with hidden noise at 1:44 PM on March 11, 2009 [1 favorite]


I recall seeing a picture of her years ago, standing on the track in her running gear and legs: a gorgeous athletic woman who happened to be mainly carbon fiber from the knees south. I thought at the time, "Wow, the very first cyborg pinup shot."
posted by ricochet biscuit at 1:53 PM on March 11, 2009


and then I said to myself "What the hell is wrong with you, dersins?" and quickly hit [Command-A] and [delete].

Check yourself before you wreck yourself.
posted by StickyCarpet at 1:54 PM on March 11, 2009


I never find this kind of thing inspirational. It's nice that she's been able to do most of the things that people who have real legs can do. It's just that I can't stop thinking about how morally exhausting it must be to be a professional hero.
posted by koeselitz at 2:02 PM on March 11, 2009


It's just that I can't stop thinking about how morally exhausting it must be to be a professional hero.

It's tough, koeselitz, but when I'm feeling down, I just think of the children. I believe they're our future.
posted by Evangeline at 2:11 PM on March 11, 2009 [4 favorites]


Seriously, it's way easier to be a professional villain. If someone takes a picture of you getting high or saying something vulgar in public, you don't lose your endorsements, you get notes from the trade union saying "Well done, keep up the good work." and "Nice job, maybe try drunker and surlier next time, that always gets 'em!"
posted by quin at 2:17 PM on March 11, 2009


So, in spite of my snark, I think it probably seems pretty damn awesome to her as she lives on a particular cusp of materials technology.

When her legs got cut off she was pretty much destined for life in a wheelchair. There just wasn't anything else at the time. By the time she got to college she had carbon-fiber legs which are, by any definition, pretty awesome. So from her perspective things went from pretty bleak to goddamn WICKED in short order. I'd be unstoppably happy too.

My sole source of snark is that this woman hardly defines the end of disabilities as we know them. She has a particular condition that's relatively easy to fix, compared to someone who stepped on a landmine. She's had a wealthy upbringing (again, relatively speaking). She's white and pretty. Her life has, in short, been pretty charmed, especially for someone without half her legs. Most disabled people aren't so lucky. That she advocates to reduce the stigma for all disabled people is a good thing but her talk was still pretty much all in the first person. Let's hear about some other awesome people who we should not think of as disabled too.
posted by GuyZero at 2:18 PM on March 11, 2009


What kind of a jackass is jealous of somebody's artificial limbs?

The non-bionic kind of course.
posted by JaredSeth at 2:19 PM on March 11, 2009


Evangeline: It's tough, koeselitz, but when I'm feeling down, I just think of the children. I believe they're our future.

Heh. Yeah, that's one thing that'll take your mind off it. The other thing is the idea of how much they must pay people who speak at conferences that charge $6000 admission per person.
posted by koeselitz at 2:28 PM on March 11, 2009


I have no proof, but I don't think TED pays speaker per se. They cover travel expenses and there's the $100,000 TED Prize they give away. But it's not the touring motivational seminar with Colin Powell and Donald Trump.
posted by GuyZero at 2:33 PM on March 11, 2009


First of all, I think I'm in love. Or at least a strange lust which has never come over me before.

I had another point but I forgot it.
posted by christhelongtimelurker at 2:48 PM on March 11, 2009


Bad knees tend to run in my family, so I've resigned to having artificial joints sometime in my future. Maybe there will be an Option B.
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:51 PM on March 11, 2009


Option B would be to put them in backwards.
posted by MegoSteve at 3:06 PM on March 11, 2009


This reminds me of the Penn & Teller BS episode about the ADA and handicap access / rights, and the notion that people could excel within their limitations if there weren't easier ways around things. But I still think trying to roll up stairs sounds like a lot of work, regardless of how strong I am. Sproingy legs are pretty awesome, but how financially feasible are they for wide adoption?
posted by filthy light thief at 3:17 PM on March 11, 2009


I'm sorry that my formulation of the FPP encouraged snarkiness. It's a little provocative itself, with all the second-person challenge it contains. I guess I was trying to reproduce that moment of jealousy Mullins describes, where you go from thinking of her as a victim to somehow unfairly privileged by her amputations. It's kind of a cool moment, and it never fails to make me love living in the future. That's also why I left the 'you' unlinked, though I played around with several other possible formulations.

Here's the snarky one-liner that I would have dropped in the thread if it hadn't been my own: "There are 1200 newly minted amputees coming out of the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, and while it's good to have functional equipment, it's also important that our servicemen and servicewomen look their best!"
posted by anotherpanacea at 3:20 PM on March 11, 2009


Most disabled people aren't so lucky

Well noted, GuyZero.

There's nothing wrong at all being wowed by her, and her spirit and the remarkable improvements in prosthetic technology.

But my late sister had a difficult amputation as an adult - and the basically unwearable, clumsy, heavy, poorly custom-made leg she was given - and tried so hopelessly to use - secretly made me cry. High tech innovations have not trickled down to most ordinary people - and when illness has reduced your life to shit anyway, an ugly, stiff, bright pink, totally unsatisfactory false leg is terribly cruel.

(So I still admire Heather Mills - the much mocked ex Mrs Beatle - for her campaign on that score).
posted by Jody Tresidder at 3:21 PM on March 11, 2009 [1 favorite]


I'm sorry that my formulation of the FPP encouraged snarkiness.

Woah, woah, woah. Let's not blame the victim here. This is a fine post. Speaking only for myself, you did nothing to encourage snarkiness. That just happens. Don't blame yourself for my maladjustments.
posted by GuyZero at 3:30 PM on March 11, 2009


Of course she has better legs than I do. She has a wider variety to choose from
posted by CynicalKnight at 3:42 PM on March 11, 2009


I was just thinking about her last night.

I didn't know who she was until I saw her in Cremaster3, and I was immediately struck by the way she used her prosthetics not only for athletics, but for art. It's amazing that they can make a person's limbs normal and functional as it is, but I really love people who embrace their prosthetics and see them as not just a necessity, but an opportunity for expression.

It's not an easy thing to do, necessarily, because there is so much pressure to be "normal." There is also a kind of taboo surrounding prosthetics. Maybe it's a visceral response to the "unwhole." A few years ago, a friend of mine was commissioned to do an original painting on a man's prosthetic leg. He called the paint company to ask for recommendations - he wanted the best paint to use on the polymer, wanted the work to be able to withstand use, etcetera. I guess the reactions ranged from confused disgust to outright rudeness to hanging up on him. He eventually finished the commission with educated guesswork and his own research, and it turned out wonderfully.


Serching for other creative prosthetics, I found this Charles and Ray Eames inspired leg.
posted by louche mustachio at 7:16 PM on March 11, 2009


Wow, the Cremaster series is getting some love. I'd thought it was pretty obscure.
posted by Pronoiac at 12:38 AM on March 12, 2009


You know, I'm usually a leg man, but for her I'd make an exception.
posted by aftermarketradio at 7:25 AM on March 12, 2009


I'm sorry that my formulation of the FPP encouraged snarkiness.

Lots of people on MetaFilter are punk bitches. That is what encourages snarkiness, not the way you worded your FPP.
posted by chunking express at 7:46 AM on March 12, 2009


I'm sorry that my formulation of the FPP encouraged snarkiness.

My question is are you surprised that it did?
posted by jessamyn at 7:53 AM on March 12, 2009


some comments in here are just kinda grosss.

enjoyed the FPP though.

moving on.
posted by lazaruslong at 8:05 AM on March 12, 2009


Wow, the Cremaster series is getting some love. I'd thought it was pretty obscure.

I also learned about her from Cremaster. I think lots of people have seen at least the excerpted version of Cremaster 3.
posted by Bookhouse at 8:20 AM on March 12, 2009


Those thighs are hers, though, and they are wicked. Rowr.
posted by RockCorpse at 8:39 AM on March 13, 2009


Only a dickhead or a troll would say something like that, RockCorpse, and guess what-- either way you're a douchebag.
posted by dersins at 10:48 AM on March 13, 2009


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