Make a Deal

March 13, 2009 1:02 PM

Don't want to empty the compost bin this week? How about a raise? Just sm00ve the negotiations.
posted by Pants! (23 comments total)

All I get is a screen scolding me for using an out-dated browser. Not too sm00ve.
posted by MrMoonPie at 1:08 PM on March 13

Yeah, me too. I wouldn't choose IE6 on Windows Server 2003 either, but tell that to my boss.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 1:11 PM on March 13

It worked for me...well, when I say worked, I'm still waiting to hear back from my parents on that soft loan of £5,000 I want. You'll miss me at Christmas you uncaring bastards!
posted by Sova at 1:17 PM on March 13

Dear girlfriend,

I've got a deal for you.



If you will give me the old bouncy-bouncy

then

I will promptly fall asleep.

Do you

Agree

or

Negotiate
Let me know

I can't wait to see if this works!
posted by Skot at 1:21 PM on March 13

That's not smoove. This is smoove.
posted by adamrice at 1:22 PM on March 13

Such an useful service for:

the passiveAGGRESSIVE!

_(cowards)

the inarticilet

conflict a ... v ... o ... i ... d ... _{e ... r ... s}

stalkers (?}, creeps ಥ_ಥ, and pervets (ΘεΘ;)
posted by Foci for Analysis at 1:25 PM on March 13

Dear acquaintance,
I've got a deal for you.
If you won't critique my interprative dance about loss of the img tag
then
I will obsessively count orange humvees until I have a number devisable by 7.
Do you

* Agree
*
* or
*
* Negotiate
Let me know
--Me

I like that there is no option to disagree.
posted by Bernt Pancreas at 1:28 PM on March 13 [1 favorite]

Dude.
posted by Mister_A at 1:42 PM on March 13

Dear email aggregator,

I've got a deal for you.



If you will get rid of all my friends

then

I will promptly give you all their email addreses.

Do you

Agree

or

Negotiate
Let me know

Umm, maybe I got the steps backwards.
posted by cjorgensen at 1:42 PM on March 13 [2 favorites]

More like email AGGRAVATOR, AMINOTCORRECTINMYASSERTION?
posted by Mister_A at 1:46 PM on March 13 [3 favorites]

Smoov Moov, Ex-Lax.
posted by swift at 1:56 PM on March 13

For this to really be useful it would have to be on torn scraps of notebook paper in the fourth grade.
posted by ook at 2:22 PM on March 13

Dear Ridikolus,

I've got a deal for you.

If you don't eat Tracy Jordan's family and agree to have Donaghy Estates as your primary corporate sponsor at the Source Awards

then

I will have Tracy host.

Do you

* Agree
*
* or
*
* Negotiate

Let me know

--Jack Donaghy
posted by jimmythefish at 2:25 PM on March 13 [1 favorite]

Dear acquaintance,

I've got a deal for you.



If you won't agree that this is a pretty weak FPP

then

I will profusely reply with snarky comments

Do you

* Agree
*
* or
*
* Negotiate

Let me know

--Me
posted by Simon Barclay at 2:34 PM on March 13

While the idea seems cute, I don't give trustworthy sites my e-mail address, much less random funny ones.
posted by graventy at 2:48 PM on March 13

Dang it, cjorgensen! I was just coming in here to make that joke. It's pretty hard to expect this not to be an email harvester. It's also rather lame.
posted by Burhanistan at 3:17 PM on March 13

I don't think that an email harvester would have this about page.
posted by Pants! at 4:14 PM on March 13

Contractor

IOU

<<<<<unreset

Come back.......



Meh. Pockettetss on shippes.
posted by Mblue at 4:14 PM on March 13

Hey, neat! In the last hour I've assumed majority ownership of GE, Exxon, Time-Warner, etc, etc - a very diverse portfolio of Dow 500 notables. I even negotiated peace in the Middle East, tried Bush and Company for war crimes, cured cancer and HIV/AIDS and managed to house and feed 99.9% of the world.

Yeah, I kind of cheated. I just used the smoove API to control my legion hordes of killer organic gardening ninja deathbots. Right, sorry, that was a lot of carnage, I know. But I'm fairly confident in the strength and accuracy in the detect a bastard algorithms being, if anything, too lenient and forgiving and they are very strongly safety-interlocked with the punch 'em in the dick subroutines. And, well, we did feed them very nicely first and just look at how the grass grows and flowers bloom!

Sorry. I just wanted to see if I could. I posted videos to Instructables and Make, want to see them? No? I'll go back to my room now.
posted by loquacious at 4:17 PM on March 13 [1 favorite]

I don't think that an email harvester would have this about page.

Just depends on the target market.
posted by Miko at 4:48 PM on March 13

Pants, you say?

Eponysterical.
posted by pompomtom at 5:26 PM on March 13

The list has "girlfriend" and "ex-wife" but not "wife". Apropos.
posted by DU at 6:21 PM on March 13

No option for the judge or the government? Useless to me then.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 7:48 AM on March 14