Need a lift?
March 16, 2009 11:05 AM   Subscribe

Kelly G lifts people and asks them questions. Annoying, obnoxious, but everyone has to have a hobby.

Has to be seen to be believed, and I'm still not sure if I "get it," but like a train wreck I can't get myself to look away.

The heaviest person she's lifted is 290 pounds. She's lifted an entire fire department (one fireman at a time).

She has no website, but she's on twitter: KellyG5
posted by cjorgensen (24 comments total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
 
Raise your hand if you thought this post was about Kenny G.
posted by Faint of Butt at 11:16 AM on March 16, 2009 [11 favorites]


I thought Ali G. had a sister.
posted by Joe Beese at 11:18 AM on March 16, 2009


My wife really hates women (it's almost always women, at least according to her) who talk about how "rambling" and "random" they are being, but this one has a certain charm.
posted by DU at 11:21 AM on March 16, 2009


> The heaviest person she's lifted is 290 pounds.... she's on twitter: KellyG5

Think how much she could lift if she upgraded to Intel.
posted by ardgedee at 11:22 AM on March 16, 2009


Lifting Ricky Schroder. Lifting 290 lb. man.
posted by cjorgensen at 11:28 AM on March 16, 2009


i'm reminded of those worms that infect snails and make them climb to the tops of branches to atrract birds (so the worm can finish it's life cycle inside the bird)...it's like she has a tiny tumor in her amygdala, no bigger than a kernel of corn...it's benign, not going to metastasize or anything...just, when she sees someone, anyone, it screams "LIFT!" "LIFT!!!"
posted by sexyrobot at 11:30 AM on March 16, 2009 [3 favorites]


Faint of Butt, I totally, totally did.
posted by Bageena at 11:33 AM on March 16, 2009


I've actually run out of snark. Congratulations Kelly G, you shut me up.

/opens and closes mouth several times without producing any words
posted by GuyZero at 11:42 AM on March 16, 2009 [4 favorites]


I had hoped this involved someone lifting strangers up and then asking those strangers questions while holding them. This is, by comparison, a pretty big disappointment.
posted by cortex at 11:45 AM on March 16, 2009 [1 favorite]


I had hoped that Kenny G had a side hobby lifting strangers and then asking obnoxious questions. That would have meant there was the possibility of redemption for the poor guy.
posted by Meatbomb at 12:13 PM on March 16, 2009


cortex, so if I'd written, "Kelly G lifts people. She also asks them questions, but not while lifting," you wouldn't have been disappointed?

She says she lifted Roy Orbison's kid, but I couldn't find a picture of that.

I was pretty ready to hate on what she does, until I realized the quantity of people she's done. That takes some persistence, especially after watching the videos where person after person tells her no. That's a lot of rejection to get to where she can create a montage of these "lifts."

Also, I am pretty sure I couldn't lift a 290 pound man. I'm not going to try though.

I admire the dedication.
posted by cjorgensen at 12:19 PM on March 16, 2009


I once searched youtube for rainwater collection systems, and came across a video of an older man who was explaining how he used to cool down (before he got his kiddie pool) by getting in his rainwater barrel. I thought there was something off about this. I then looked over at the other videos by him. All of them were videos of him in water. Then I looked at the titles and it dawned on me, the man had a fetish. A very strange fetish.

I don't exactly get the same vibe from this lady but maybe it's a fetish. Maybe.
posted by robtf3 at 12:19 PM on March 16, 2009


cortex, so if I'd written, "Kelly G lifts people. She also asks them questions, but not while lifting," you wouldn't have been disappointed?

That would have significantly altered the emotional arc of my reading experience, yes.
posted by cortex at 12:21 PM on March 16, 2009


She says she lifted Roy Orbison's kid, but I couldn't find a picture of that.

Was he wrapped in cling film?
posted by loquacious at 12:27 PM on March 16, 2009


Yes, but not while she lifted him.
posted by cortex at 12:35 PM on March 16, 2009 [1 favorite]


Yes, but not while she lifted him.

OK THAT'S THE LAST FUCKING STRAW BUDDY I WANT MY FIVE DOLLARS BACK
posted by loquacious at 12:44 PM on March 16, 2009


LOLCANADIANS! AMIRITE!

Canadians, more charm than snow.
posted by From Bklyn at 12:44 PM on March 16, 2009


If I had to guess where a lady was lifting people and asking them questions, I think I would have said Queen Street.
posted by CaseyB at 12:47 PM on March 16, 2009


I lift people's wallets.
posted by koeselitz at 1:53 PM on March 16, 2009


Everbody needs a hobby!

I guess you would've had to have seen the movie to get that joke.
posted by P.o.B. at 2:04 PM on March 16, 2009


I heard about this lady on the other side of the internet who goes around lifting cats! Let's go, everybody!
posted by orme at 2:04 PM on March 16, 2009


The secret is.... she lifts their SPIRITS!
posted by blue_beetle at 3:07 PM on March 16, 2009 [1 favorite]


Lifting Alex 'Orbi' Orbison (Roy Orbison's son).

And blue_beetle, I know you meant it differently, but as far as I can tell this is truly her motive. People find it funny. It makes them smile. So she does it.
posted by cjorgensen at 7:30 AM on March 17, 2009


Just a quick follow up. I got this in email and was asked to share:
Hey Everyone!

Thanks so much for ALL the feedback! the good the bad and wow the one ugly ha ha! It's really great to hear it all and I just wanted to say a little something back in return!

I do not have a fetish with LIFTing... but I totally understand someone might think that... to be honest I still can't wrap my brain around how this can even be a fettish... but in any event... the reason I do this is because it makes people smile and I get to interact with all sorts of great people! I have lifted over 400 people now and would LOVE to break my current record of lifting someone who was 290 pounds by lifting a 300 pounder :)

I love makin silly videos that make people laugh! I'd really LOVE to have my very own talk show one day! I'm currently doing a bit of improv at Second City which I absofreakinlutly LOVE!

Well folks... again... thank you SOOO much for all your comments! And if you ever see me... anywhere.... make sure to ask... "Hey Kelly G! Can you LIFT me?"

Cheers!
Kelly G!
I still don't know what to think of this whole idea, which was probably why I liked it, and for sure why I posted it. I heard of Kelly only a couple days before I made the meta post, but if you'd told me there was such a person in the world prior to this I'm not sure I would have believed you.
posted by cjorgensen at 7:01 PM on March 18, 2009


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