LOL116DEADCANADIANSOLDIERS

March 24, 2009 5:13 PM

Fox News, keeping it classy, recently aired a comedy segment ridiculing the Canadian military's efforts in Afghanistan. On the overnight programme, host Greg Gutfeld and friends joked about Canada's plan to pull out troops in 2011 to "do some yoga, paint landscapes, run on the beach in gorgeous white Capri pants." He also suggested invading Canada seeing as how they "have no real army", and mocked the last name of one of the Canadian generals as being unmasculine.

The Fox segment has been one of the leading news stories in Canada for the past 48 hours. There is also some discussion States-side, although MSNBC decided to lead off with the glib title "Fox News sorry for dissing Canadian army, eh?"

Foreign Affairs Minister Peter Mackay has stated "it is insensitive and it is, in fact, disgusting given the timing (on the day of his statement, four more dead Canadian soldiers were being brought back to Canada for burial). Meanwhile, Gutfeld has issued a statement of apology, claiming that the program is meant as "a satirical take on the news, in which all topics are addressed in a lighthearted, humorous and ridiculous manner." He also posted on Twitter: "My apologies to the Canadian military, they probably could at least beat the Belgians." Meanwhile comedian Doug Benson, who appeared with the Red Eye discussion panel and claimed during the segment that he didn't even know Canada was involved in the war in Afghanistan, has had comedy dates in Alberta canceled.

Watch the complete segment, if you care to, at the usual YouTube link.

posted by spoobnooble (138 comments total)

That's what passes for humor, at this muckraking brothel that passes for a news network.
posted by clevershark at 5:19 PM on March 24 [3 favorites]

You know, if I had the energy, I'd make some sort of comment about how asinine Faux News is. At the same time, I expect this sort of behavior from one of America's dumbest news outlets.

Fucking mental midgets they are. They remind me of football hooligans.
posted by kldickson at 5:19 PM on March 24

Previously
posted by The White Hat at 5:19 PM on March 24

Previously. I've seen Canadian friends on facebook get up in arms about this, and frankly I can't blame them.
posted by ob at 5:21 PM on March 24

Come on. It's like taking what the New York Post says about you seriously. Someone tell Canada that, okay? That it's even less of a realistic take on current events than anything Comedy Central has to offer.
posted by padraigin at 5:25 PM on March 24

These conservative news-comedy shows are just. so. painful. These people just don't seem to get that conservative comedy is, at its core, about being mean.
posted by GuyZero at 5:26 PM on March 24 [20 favorites]

I can't wait to see wait 22 Minutes and Rick Mercer do with this one, given the large number of stories both of them have done about the chronic military underfundage and decaying helicopters.

"Prime Minister Martin, has sent three Canadian Forces Hercules aircraft to Haiti to help evacuate people. However most people feel safer in Haiti then on a Canadian Forces aircraft."
posted by nomisxid at 5:27 PM on March 24 [2 favorites]

Hey, another example that neoconservatives have no idea what humor even looks like.
posted by boo_radley at 5:27 PM on March 24 [3 favorites]

At least these rubes are more honest about their prejudice .
posted by kldickson at 5:27 PM on March 24

Does the Canadian government allow FOX News to broadcast in Canada? I thought they had hate speech laws there, for protecting the public.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 5:27 PM on March 24 [3 favorites]

Hey, um, Canada? If you were to send your effete, Capri-pants soldiers to kick Fox News' collective ass, quite a number of us would be just fine with that.

Please be sure to wear the pants while beating them. It will send the proper signal.
posted by Malor at 5:31 PM on March 24 [25 favorites]

The funny thing is that while most members here know it's pseudo-news built on knee-jerkery, there are far more people in the U.S.A. who believe everything FOX News puts before them.

Okay, that's not actually funny at all.

But it's true.
posted by batmonkey at 5:31 PM on March 24

These conservative news-comedy shows are just. so. painful. These people just don't seem to get that conservative comedy is, at its core, about being mean.

Yes, what ever happened the The America Show with those three MacBethian witches? That was TOP CLASS comedy. Fucking sidesplitting.
posted by mattoxic at 5:31 PM on March 24

You can get FNC from some of the cable providers, but I'm pretty sure more people pick the Home & Garden channel than Fox. It's hard to imagine why Canadian would want that channel in their lineup anyway, what with it surviving pretty much purely on American jingoism.
posted by clevershark at 5:32 PM on March 24

As a Canadian, I think the reaction to Doug Benson may be a bit overblown. Granted, I'm a fan, but it wouldn't surprise me if he really didn't know. All I know about him is that he smokes tons of pot and watches movies all day. He's kind of a big harmless likeable dummy, that's his shtick.

From what I heard the other guys did all the offending, but I guess you have to be careful of the company you keep.
posted by Hoopo at 5:34 PM on March 24

Please don't call it muckraking. Muckraking is looking for problems and abuses and outrages and publicizing them, bringing them to light. It has nothing to do with Fox.
posted by Pope Guilty at 5:34 PM on March 24 [14 favorites]

Fox news should not be the embodiment of "Americanism", but it tries hard to be, and when you have a (regrettably) large media outlet that constantly yells rather loudly it certainly reinforces all the negative American stereotypes. This is how America is being portrayed to many people, unfortunately given the large viewing audience of Fox, one can not just dismiss it out-of-hand as being completely wrong.
posted by edgeways at 5:37 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

Meanwhile comedian Doug Benson...has had comedy dates in Alberta canceled.

C'mon, shouldn't you guys be punishing him instead of giving out rewards?
posted by mannequito at 5:40 PM on March 24 [5 favorites]

Alberta is the part of Canada that Americans (especially Texans!) travel to when they don't *really* want to leave their own country...
posted by clevershark at 5:42 PM on March 24 [5 favorites]

This topic was, quite honestly, done to death. All Canadian media, all link aggregation media, and some American media carried it. The douchebag has already "apologized" for his idiocy. And yet it has to be brought to MeFi? Why, oh why?

Giving Gutmann further attention is counterproductive. This should have been left to quickly fizzle out as the unimportant non-event that it really, truly was. 3AM talk show hosts are of no consequence to anything.
posted by five fresh fish at 5:42 PM on March 24

I like that his apology tried to say that his remarks were misunderstood. What fucking balls.
posted by boo_radley at 5:44 PM on March 24

I agree, paying attention to this doesn't help any. American conservatives already have a persecution complex the size of Nunavut, being 'oppressed in Canada' will just make them feel ever more the victim.
posted by These Premises Are Alarmed at 5:46 PM on March 24

c/Gutmann/Gutfeld/
posted by five fresh fish at 5:47 PM on March 24

No way mann. The comedy circuit is one of the great things we share with the US (well, with California, anyway). We get to hear lots of great American comics, and you get to hear lots of great Canadian comics. At least till they move to LA and become American comics.

On the other hand, lots of people here watch Faux News and not only believe what they see, but think it applies to Canada. Just to point out that the US isn't the only source of blistering stupidity on the continent.
posted by sneebler at 5:47 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

That's what passes for humor, at this muckraking brothel that passes for a news network.

I think it's more than Fox News. It seems, to me, like conservatives often confuse cruelty and humor.
posted by Flunkie at 5:56 PM on March 24

I can't wait to see wait 22 Minutes and Rick Mercer do with this one

On first impression, he was pretty classy.
posted by CynicalKnight at 5:58 PM on March 24

So, if I recall correctly from a metafilter thread a ways back, Canadian snipers protecting U.S. troops in Afghanistan set several new world records for long range kills.

I imagine the U.S. marines benefiting from that protection didn't have many complaints about Canadian troops.
posted by Derive the Hamiltonian of... at 6:01 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

I imagine the U.S. marines benefiting from that protection didn't have many complaints about Canadian troops.

And I think the reaction to Canadian troops in Afghanistan being killed by Americans in 2002 was mostly one of shock, sadness and anger as opposed to us cracking wise about the quality of American bomber pilots.

From what little is said on the matter I think troops from various countries fighting in Afghanistan get along fairly well. It's no place to make any more enemies than you have already.
posted by GuyZero at 6:06 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

Can't muster any outrage; the people saying these things are obviously morons with a history of saying stupid, provocative things and Canada is awesome, despite various shortcomings and idiosyncacies.

Stupid Americans* should savour their idiocy - it's the purest expression of their under-appreciated and squandered freedom they have left.

*which is not all of them, by any means.
posted by chudmonkey at 6:08 PM on March 24

You know, I could be the bigger man and not post something like this.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 6:08 PM on March 24 [4 favorites]

What's your MOS, Fox News talking head?
posted by Ron Thanagar at 6:08 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

Fox New: HEY CANADA CHECK OUT THE SIZE OF OUR DICK!

Canada: Get away from me you fucking pervert.

Fox New: LOL ONLY JOKING. BUT OUR DICK'S PRETTY BIG HUH?

Canada: Jesus Christ.
posted by turgid dahlia at 6:13 PM on March 24 [86 favorites]

Yeah, for some reason, I always thought "supporting the troops" extended to our allies as well as our own fighting forces. But I suppose that shouldn't trouble Fox News. They've always been in favor of us acting unilaterally, anyhow. Who the hell needs allies when you have the Bush Doctrine?
posted by Afroblanco at 6:13 PM on March 24

Political pressure, including from Fox News cheeringleading, gets so high for war in Iraq that Canada is forced to join. Many Candians die. Fox News laughs.

Not much to add to that.
posted by DU at 6:17 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

Please don't call it muckraking. Muckraking is looking for problems and abuses and outrages and publicizing them, bringing them to light. It has nothing to do with Fox.

Please don't call it a brothel either. The people who work in brothels provide a useful service, valued by their customers.

Fox News is more like the media equivalent of the Murphy Game, where the rubes from the sticks believe they're parting with their hard earned cash for proper news, but what they get in its place is the news equivalent of a crack-addicted drag queen with a sponge between her legs, pretending to be a woman while a couple of pimps wait outside with baseball bats, waiting to beat the shit out of anybody sober enough to notice that they're getting scammed.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 6:19 PM on March 24 [12 favorites]

gets so high for war in Iraq

I'm sure you meant Afghanistan, but just in case there's some Fox News viewers on Mefi.
posted by Adam_S at 6:20 PM on March 24

Canadian Tom Green gives his nuanced opinion on the Fox News scandal

(notwithstanding the fact that Green appeared on Red Eye one month earlier...)
posted by spoobnooble at 6:28 PM on March 24 [3 favorites]

Alberta is the part of Canada that Americans (especially Texans!) travel to when they don't *really* want to leave their own country...

Such as George W. Bush, but even there he draws jeers.
posted by IvoShandor at 6:30 PM on March 24

Fox seems to be doing a bangup of living up to its "Network of Assholes" mission statement.
posted by kittens for breakfast at 6:30 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

These were totally dickish remarks from the Fox commentors, and as humour they have very little grounding in any reality. Canada has a pretty good military history, and its served quite a few wars that served US interests.

At the close of World War 2, Canada had one of the largest militaries in the world (in a country with less than 30 million people today) but it was largely de-mobilized. No less a man than Thomas Jefferson warned people about what having a large standing army does to a democratic society. I believe Canada did the right thing, and we have plenty of examples which prove Jefferson was largely correct.

But part of the reason this joke was made is that Canadians (and I am Canadian) are way too sensitive to this kind of thing. We aren't a colony of anymore (though to be fair, a lot of us were born in one), and we don't need to care what the Americans, British, or French think as much as we do.
posted by Deep Dish at 6:33 PM on March 24 [4 favorites]

Gutfield has (of course) never served in the armed services.

Gutfield's previous employment has included such bastions of journalistic integrity as Stuff and Maxim, where he hired a phalanx of dwarves to be 'loud and annoying'

...and he met his wife in a brothel

I suggest we start a campaign for Gutfield to enlist. Let him step into the breach.

You stay classy, Fox.
posted by leotrotsky at 6:34 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

uh, Gutfeld
posted by leotrotsky at 6:36 PM on March 24

(Thanks for the love, American friends. Back atcha.)

Like most of the world, I only saw this on YouTube, after the fuss had already erupted.

What stood out for me was how hard they worked to get some hard-right points in there, like how Canada is free-riding on US military might. Pat Buchanan must be ghostwriting for them. (Haven't forgotten 'Canuckistan', you douchenozzle)

Biggest crime? The bit wasn't funny.
posted by Artful Codger at 6:37 PM on March 24

where he hired a phalanx of dwarves to be 'loud and annoying'

So that's how we got Fox News.
posted by kittens for breakfast at 6:37 PM on March 24

Does anyone even watch this show? It's on at 3 o'clock in the morning. While it's a lame, insensitive and stupid thing to say right after four Canadians were killed in Afghanistan, it seems to me that Peter MacKay is milking this opportunity for all that it's worth, to score political points with the Tim Hortons crowd.
posted by KokuRyu at 6:44 PM on March 24

Juno Beach, Rupert. Juno Fucking Beach.

c-words. Man I hate Fox.
posted by Nick Verstayne at 6:46 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

Once again chicken shit assholes who have their lazy safe fat asses plopped safely on a couch in some studio in New York ironically ridicule guys who have spent the last six years getting shot at in the most god forsaken hell holes on earth.

Greg Gutfeld. What worthless hack. God damn that show is so forced an un-funny it makes reruns of Family Matters look like comedy gold.
posted by tkchrist at 6:48 PM on March 24

Foreign Affairs Minister of National Defence Peter MacKay...

Fixed that for you, Lawrence Cannon is Minister of Foreign Affairs.
posted by furtive at 6:56 PM on March 24

You know, I was on a trip with some Americans a few years ago, and they asked us what Canadians thought of Americans, if we hated them or what. And I told her that the relationship was complicated, but maybe the way to summarize it was this: in the moments, literally the moments after the World Trade Center was destroyed, the U.S. declared American airspace to be a no-fly zone. Everybody out, or you get shot down, 747 passenger jets and cessnas alike. And an awful lot of those airplanes landed, because they couldn't land anywhere else, in Canada.

The hotels filled up pretty much instantly, and planes were still coming in. But without anyone else's encouragement the locals who had rooms and beds available started calling the airport, telling them that they could house people who'd otherwise be caught at the airport sleeping on the floor for a few days, while the situation played out. They did that, it got organized, and mostly American travellers had a place to stay, phones and showers and so forth, while their airspace got sorted out and trips home could be organized.

A couple of months later, the Canadian softwood lumber industry (a relatively small concern to the American economy but a _huge_ part of the Canadian one) had to fight tooth and nail against the protectionism of the Bush government, going all the way to the World Trade Organization to get a successful verdict on a trade dispute only to see the U.S. government ignore that verdict and keep up their tariffs, at a substantial cost to the Canuck economy.

So the question that Canadians had, and in a lot of ways still has, is simple. Is this how you treat your friends? And if so what good is it, being your friend?
posted by mhoye at 6:58 PM on March 24 [77 favorites]

Patriotic trivia: some Canadian marksmen hold the world record for sniping distance, over 2000m (that's about 1-1/3 miles). Duck.
posted by anthill at 7:05 PM on March 24

I can't wait to see wait 22 Minutes and Rick Mercer do with this one

Funny you should say that. The first thing I thought of was that Fox was just getting revenge for this (warning: Americans sounding kinda dumb ahead).
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 7:06 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

mhoye - excellent point. I agree with you 100%, but would question if the Bush Administration thought that people coming into America on airplanes just after the September 11th attacks were actually American (most people coming into the US are ILLEGAL ALIENS AMIRITE). So you guys were prolly harbo(u)ring terrorists.
posted by Nick Verstayne at 7:10 PM on March 24

Troy Hurtubise has thrown his hat in the ring now.
posted by serial_consign at 7:18 PM on March 24

I don't know why I feel like I need to say this, but I'm gonna say it anyway: this Canadian doesn't for one second think that Fox News is representative of the views of most of our American friends.

I would never have known about this story if it wasn't for our own media picking it up, and I suspect the same is true of 99% of my fellow citizens. Which is too bad really, because who wants to give Fox executives the idea that anybody actually watches their network?
posted by FishBike at 7:26 PM on March 24

God damn, Tom Green's fuckin' stupid. I mean, I'm annoyed with this Garfield dude, but, christ, Tom Green. Goddamn.
posted by boo_radley at 7:26 PM on March 24

Nick Verstayne: Well, under that mindset, replace "sheltering and comforting your distressed citizenry" with "stuck our necks out by allowing potentially dangerous people in, all to help ensure that you didn't get blowed up again."
posted by CKmtl at 7:30 PM on March 24

Fishbike:
"who wants to give Fox executives the idea that anybody actually watches their network?"

As much as we'd like to pretend no one watches this drivel, many do.
posted by batmonkey at 7:30 PM on March 24

Wait, Troy's the bear-suit guy, right? I'd like to imagine he's making a mech that will reign terror down upon Gutmann.
posted by boo_radley at 7:31 PM on March 24

Such as George W. Bush, but even there he draws jeers.

That George Bush's first public speech was held in Calgary, to a crowd that paid several hundred bucks per plate, scares the shit out of me. Why on earth did Calgary get selected for his first speech? WTF, Calgary?

No good can come of it, I'm certain.
posted by five fresh fish at 7:33 PM on March 24

I just wanted to take this opportunity to post the most WTF thing I've seen on Fox News. Fox News is a terrible guilty pleasure of mine for the first two hours or so every time I check into an American hotel.
posted by avocet at 7:36 PM on March 24

...this Canadian doesn't for one second think that Fox News is representative of the views of most of our American friends...

This is probably true. Unfortunately, what is also probably true is that a great many Americans get their views from Fox News. It's sometimes hard to develop an opinion, so it is supremely convenient when one comes pre-packaged.

It's a lot like being an emo. Emos gets a sort of package deal: you wear you hair like this (spending an hour or more on it every morning with the end result being that a great wave of it covers one of your eyes, rendering you partially blind), here is some eyeliner, this is the standard uniform and how tight your pants should be and what percentage of your underwear ought to be showing, here's a selection of music that you must listen to and enjoy.

Simple. Your identity taken care of in a few easy steps! Why bother forming one of your own?

Thus it is with Fox News: here's what you need to think, here's what's important, here is your regularly-scheduled selection of opinions. LOLNADIANS, pedophiles everywhere, and this is what will give you cancer today.
posted by turgid dahlia at 7:39 PM on March 24 [4 favorites]

Juno Beach - Canada - 21,000 men
Omaha Beach - US - 43,000 men

Guess which group achieved more of their initial objectives on day 1.

And France has never won a battle ever. Unless you count that little hoo-ha at Yorktown.
posted by Kid Charlemagne at 7:42 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

Troy Hurtubise has thrown his hat in the ring now.

Christ omnipotent.
posted by Adam_S at 7:42 PM on March 24

Tom Green is the man. Represent!
posted by stinkycheese at 7:44 PM on March 24

Not that it's germane to the discussion, but Canada apologizes.
posted by five fresh fish at 7:45 PM on March 24 [5 favorites]

Fox News ... recently aired a comedy segment

I'm really having trouble parsing that statement.

"do some yoga, paint landscapes, run on the beach in gorgeous white Capri pants."

This Canadian guy even wore a funny hat!

What a bunch of dumbasses on Fox. Sheesh.
posted by me & my monkey at 7:50 PM on March 24

That George Bush's first public speech was held in Calgary, to a crowd that paid several hundred bucks per plate, scares the shit out of me. Why on earth did Calgary get selected for his first speech? WTF, Calgary?

Well, I wouldn't say no good, fff.

This rankles just a little bit more because of the friendly fire incident in which 4 Canadian soldiers were killed by American forces in Afghanistan. I don't expect anyone to get remembrance tattoos of the event, but being aware of this fact couldn't hurt your credibility.
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 7:54 PM on March 24

Guess which group achieved more of their initial objectives on day 1.

In fairness to the 3,000 young boys who got their fucking heads blown off at Omaha Beach on the 6th of June, 1944, it is generally agreed that this was the most heavily-defended segment, and the landing itself was an absolute travesty.

Having said that, the casualty rates in the initial waves on Juno and Omaha were comparable.
posted by turgid dahlia at 7:54 PM on March 24

Troy Hurtubise has thrown his hat in the ring now.

Seriously, Fox News characters, you do not really want to invade Canada. It may not have many Mujahideen, but it does contain a significant number of guys like Troy Hurtubise who would quicky be on their way to infiltrating your cities. If you want to console yourselves over recent military disappointments, I suggest an easier target. How about Leutonia? You guys could totally take Leutonia.
posted by sfenders at 8:02 PM on March 24

Come to think of it, how the fuckity fuck does George Bush, who is absolutely a war criminal, get a free pass into Canada?
posted by five fresh fish at 8:02 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

If you haven't, you really should watch Troy's video. It's pretty shocking, but part of me thinks,"well, what did this Fox guy expect?"
posted by boo_radley at 8:16 PM on March 24

What do the following have in common?

1 My doctors waiting room.
2 My opthamologist's waiting room
3 My retina surgeon's waiting room
4 My local McDonalds






They all play Faux news incessantly on their tv sets.
posted by notreally at 8:18 PM on March 24

['Secular'/'liberal'/I don't know what term to use] comedy attacks the actions of a person, 'conservative' 'comedy' attacks the person themself. Not something I consider to be very classy. Or funny, for that matter.
posted by six-or-six-thirty at 8:21 PM on March 24

Why is an apology sufficient? If a real news network had insulted an American ally's troops during wartime the offenders would be fired. Not that any reputable journalist would be that insensitive or his editors that asleep at the switch.
posted by Tashtego at 8:21 PM on March 24

Hey clevershark- Quebec is the part of Canada Americans (especially Texans!) travel to when they want to firebomb a synagogue.

We let girls play soccer with hijabs on in Calgary, whereas the racist cunts in Montreal wouldn't. Quebeckers are the most xenophobic people in Canada, so try cleaning up the garbage in your own backyard before stereotyping us.
posted by ethnomethodologist at 8:40 PM on March 24

oh, great. Another thread derailed with Calgary-Quebec bickering.
posted by boo_radley at 8:43 PM on March 24 [6 favorites]

Said as a single word - calgaryquebec - it sounds a lot like something a cryptozoologist might be interested in.
posted by turgid dahlia at 9:03 PM on March 24

Calgary, Quebec...they're all east of me, let the bastards freeze in the dark.
posted by Hoopo at 9:06 PM on March 24 [4 favorites]

I know. Calgary and Quebec need to find a way to just get along, like Vancouver and Toronto do.

I think the second Canadians hear "Fox news" they just kinda go "oh, right". But then it stings a little because we know millions of Americans watch and agree with Fox News and meanwhile our guys are getting killed.

That having been said, I think most rational adults recognise that the guy is just another tool with a TV show and not worth getting worked up into a lather over - unless your a politico looking to score easy points with the voters (I'm looking at you Petey).
posted by Salmonberry at 9:07 PM on March 24

The reason conservative comedy often fails is that it comes from the viewpoint of privilege. The people it defends are powerful and wealthy. At Fox News, there's also a pandering to the lowest common denominator at work. So what you're left with are "comedians" who are the equivalent of the school bully's sycophantic toadies, the guys who look over his shoulder as he pummels the smaller kids for their lunch money and go "HAW HAW. Take that, faggot!"

And of course, if one day the small kid fights back and knocks the bully ass over teakettle into the mud and makes him cry, they're there to beat their chests and cry "Oh GOD he's an animal, a brute, a psychopath! It's a travesty that such a rough beast is allowed to roam the grounds at will! Principal, lock him up and throw away the key, do! Won't someone think of the children? "


Unfortunately, there is a large section of the population that believes that if they kiss the bully's ass long and hard enough, he will grant them money, power and protection. They live vicariously through Fox News.
posted by louche mustachio at 9:10 PM on March 24 [12 favorites]

Troy Hurtubise has thrown his hat in the ring now.

If I saw Troy Hurtubise's hat throw into a ring, I would be skurred. Indeed, his hats are designed to induce terror in his adversaries.


Some are also designed to withstand massive amounts of blunt force, but I don't think he would wear that hat to a fight with four mushy Americans with big mouths.
posted by louche mustachio at 9:16 PM on March 24

Canada, here's a tip. Stuff like this wouldn't happen so often if you weren't so easy to troll. The more you react, the funnier the trolls think their joke is.
posted by afu at 9:25 PM on March 24

Come on people. Mostly unfunny is the worst thing you can say about this. Why do we have to get so uptight about things comedians say? Why is my defence minister wasting his time responding to an American comedian?
posted by '' at 9:33 PM on March 24

Having watched the entire Troy Hurtubise video now, and some of his other youtubery, I apologize for suggesting in a previous comment that anyone who is at all like him exists anywhere in the world.

The reason conservative comedy often fails is that it comes from the viewpoint of privilege. The people it defends are powerful and wealthy.

I don't think that's it. "Conservative comedy" is just an oxymoron when conservative takes a literal definition. "Consrevatives" can do good comedy, certainly, but comedy itself is never conservative. It is always subversive in one way or another. It doesn't work well when it's out to defend something; more of an offensive weapon really. And of course it is possible for good comedy to make effective fun of anyone, no matter how poor and oppressed they may be: Attacking wealth and power may suggest different forms and conventions, and it may be an easier target, but in the deeper analysis it has nothing to do with the fundamental qualities that make comedy work. Your sense of humour may vary.
posted by sfenders at 9:34 PM on March 24 [2 favorites]

22 Minutes - Mark Critch

By now you've heard that fox news commentator Grrg Gutfeld apologized for mocking the Canadian military, and saying it was the perfect time to invade our ridiculous country, while our military was getting pedicures or manicures.

I'm getting a little tired of the americans mocking our military, iI mean yes, we didn't go to Vietnam, we know we missed out on that one.
What we did do was sign up for ww2 in 1939, 2 years before you decided to get involved. And yes we didn't go to Iraq, but thanks anyway for the invite.

However, we did go to Afghanistan, home to the people who launched those terrorist attacks on your country, and since we've been there, we've lost 116 of our soldiers.
And you know what? Nobody flew any planes into our buildings.
What will it take to make you people happy?
What if we sent Steven Harper to stand on an aircraft carrier with the words "Mission Accomplished" on a big banner behind him? Would that do it?
And while you're joking about how easy it is to invade us, just remember, we burned down your White House in 1812, and you know what? It felt gooooood.
posted by nomisxid at 9:35 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

Hah, I bet you could troll Greg Garmann with that: "I mean, what kind of jerks would lose to the Canadians?" When he concurs, point out one of Canada's memorials to the war.
posted by boo_radley at 9:53 PM on March 24

The 22 Minutes segment is just nasty and uncalled for. Gutfeld is a nobody. But the assholes at 22 Minutes have decided to insult every American.

BTW, Rick Mercer claims that "bullying is not satire." But the guy is the biggest bully there is.
posted by KokuRyu at 10:03 PM on March 24

3AM talk show hosts are of no consequence to anything.

Agreed - if you're on FOX News at three in the morning, it's because you're too boring for AM radio, too ugly for the day shift, and lack the meager, pretty much non-existent shred of credibility for prime time.

You know, I could be the bigger man and not post something like this.

"The War of 1812 is the Most Irritating War of All."

it seems to me that Peter MacKay is milking this opportunity for all that it's worth

Well, the possibly next secretary general of NATO needs to keep a high profile after he totally put those airspace-approaching Rooskies in their place: "... to uh, send a strong signal, that, uh, they should, uh BACK OFF!".

If you haven't, you really should watch Troy's video. It's pretty shocking

I closed it after about three seconds, when the embarrassment I felt for him and his backwoods wrestling circuit delivery became too much to take. Wondering why his name was familiar and not understanding the bear suit reference ("Former zealous fan of the Vancouver Grizzlies?"), I googled it to learn he was that bear suit guy.

Now I'm torn.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 10:20 PM on March 24

Can we just be done with it and make Kate Beaton the next GG already?
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 10:21 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

But the assholes at 22 Minutes have decided to insult every American.

Maybe, but FOX News represents the image of America overseas, whether we like it or not. They have become the de facto voice of the United States, thanks to Dubya.

So either we finally get those fascist Republican pricks running FOX News on a leash, or we have to deal with the global consequences of those pricks opening their mouths and embarrassing Americans again and again.

Canadians are only responding to a pretty grievous insult. There really is no reason for their country to help us in our illegal colonial wars. They should pull their military out of there now. For that matter, they shouldn't have helped Bush in the first fucking place.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 10:27 PM on March 24 [2 favorites]

Never heard of any of these people until this morning, so I'm a bit taken aback by the sheer anger so many people are feeling. I mean, American conservatives have insulted our country many times before. Guess it was the timing (and the miltary subject), what with the recent casualties in Afghanistan. You picked a real bad time to be douchebags, Fox News.

At least whathisname, Benson, had the local dates cancelled. It would be pretty lame if he could take part in that douchefest and then just come up here and make money off us like it never happened.
posted by Kevin Street at 10:36 PM on March 24

FOX News represents the image of America overseas, whether we like it or not

No they don't, at least not exclusively, and certainly not to anyone with at least half a brain.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 10:40 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

There is a HUGE difference between mocking the citizens of a country and insulting the dead soldiers of a country. I'm not aware of any broadcasts where a Canadian program literally mocked the deaths of American soldiers, but I certainly have seen US programs mock Canadians, and I have seen Canadian programs mock Americans. I quite enjoyed the parts that were well done. "Let's go to the mall" comes to mind.

Whereas Greg Gutfeld apparently felt just fine about pissing on the sacrifice and memory of Canadian soldiers in Afghanistan, some of whom were killed by his own country's soldiers. Yeah, he sure told us, didn't he?

I have an idea for a new reality show. Greg Gutfeld can go to Afghanistan and tell these same 'jokes' to a barracks full of Canadian soldiers.
It's kind of free-form from there.
posted by Dipsomaniac at 10:48 PM on March 24 [3 favorites]

It seems, to me, like conservatives often confuse cruelty and humor.

I don't think they're confused about it, frankly. I do believe they simply find cruelty funny.
posted by davejay at 10:48 PM on March 24 [3 favorites]

Fox news has the most flashing graphics and statuesque mannequin female reporters of any US news network. Just a data point.
posted by Burhanistan at 10:51 PM on March 24

But the assholes at 22 Minutes have decided to insult every American.

Maybe, but FOX News represents the image of America overseas

Technically, America is not considered overseas from Canada.


The 22 Minutes segment is just nasty and uncalled for.

You have got to be kidding. What was nasty about what you linked to? I swear, if you see that as "nasty," you are delusional.


No they don't, at least not exclusively, and certainly not to anyone with at least half a brain.

You can not seriously believe that. When people in your own country are saying they think less of America because of Fox News, surely to gods you must admit that the statement "FOX News represents the image of America overseas" is more true than not. You might not like the fact, but come on!
posted by five fresh fish at 11:05 PM on March 24

That's what passes for humor, at this muckraking brothel that passes for a news network.

Muckraking is awesome stuff. FNC is not. I think you meant "fucking".

Also, I wouldn't call them a brothel...prostitutes don't deceive people. Its insulting to prostitutes to call FNC a brothel.
posted by hal_c_on at 11:51 PM on March 24 [2 favorites]

Does FOX News represent an aspect of American culture? Certainly.

But the same can be said of thousands of other things of greater influence and ubiquity than this, and holding a nation accountable because of some stupid and insipid throwaway comments is just asinine.

If Canadians' opinions of an entire nation and by extension, its citizens, is lowered by the blitherings of some hacks on a lowest common denominator network, then I think they either have an already low opinion or preexisting prejudice that has simply been reinforced, or are missing a goodly chunk of grey matter.

The comments weren't funny not because they were mean, but because they just weren't funny - like other people have mentioned, the Canadian military and its limited resources have been lampooned with far more bite. The obvious ignorance of Gutfeld and his guests as they forced chortles while flailing about for variations on 'Canadians are faggy, lol' was painfully lame and toothless, since it was obvious they didn't know shit about what they were talking about.

At one point we would have just pointed and laughed at this bunkum - personally, I find the outrage disconcerting and in some ways it feels really jingoistic and nationalistic.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 11:54 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

You have got to be kidding. What was nasty about what you linked to? I swear, if you see that as "nasty," you are delusional.

Well, hey, at least I commented on the content, unlike you, who commented on a user (me). That's nasty.

Anyway, I don't see why we Canadians have to continually make snide remarks about about the War of 1812 or whatever. We Canadians have a real chip on our shoulder, and even a third-rate nobody comic provides the equally unfunny "comics" at 22 Minutes to say nasty things about our neighbours. The show should have made a distinction between Gutfeld and regular Americans, who are decent people who don't give much thought to Canada at all.
posted by KokuRyu at 11:59 PM on March 24 [1 favorite]

I find the outrage disconcerting and in some ways it feels really jingoistic and nationalistic.

Exactly.
posted by KokuRyu at 12:00 AM on March 25

It's a strange time, what with everybody worried about the economy, and that whole Stephen Harper vs. the Coalition mess that's barely behind us. I guess folks are feeling a little more emotional than normal.
posted by Kevin Street at 12:05 AM on March 25

Come to think of it, how the fuckity fuck does George Bush, who is absolutely a war criminal, get a free pass into Canada?

He didn't give any ambulances to Palestine.
posted by rodgerd at 12:20 AM on March 25 [3 favorites]

A counter-example just occurred to me: would it be sensical or fair for Europeans* to claim the belligerent blusterings of Don Cherry, whose national audience and influence is proportionally probably far greater than Gutfeld's, caused them to have a lower opionion of Canada?

I know that Cherry does not speak for me or represent my views; to think Gutfeld does for the average American citizen, or that FOX is representative of a nation, is silly and myopic.

"But Cherry is just a public figure/sports commentator! Gutfeld is on a news channel!"
They're both just heads on a screen.

*Since, you know, Europe is really just one big country.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 12:22 AM on March 25

Don Cherry's wardrobe is bad enough to cause an international incident all by itself.
posted by Kevin Street at 12:29 AM on March 25 [2 favorites]

What happened to Gutfeld's face? Poor asshole looks like someone took a hacksaw to it.
posted by bardic at 12:48 AM on March 25

And France has never won a battle ever. Unless you count that little hoo-ha at Yorktown.

That Napoleon guy won the odd battle here and there. Until he invaded Russia in winter. Rookie mistake.
posted by kersplunk at 2:06 AM on March 25 [1 favorite]

I think part of what's being characterized as a "thin-skinned" reaction on Canadians' part has to do with a simple and sad difference in how military casualties are felt nationally. Canada has not (yet) been numbed to soldier deaths in the way that the US seems to have been (also, they don't have media restrictions on returning coffins). So when one soldier dies in Afghanistan, it's all over Canadian media for at least a day if not more, including tributes, analysis of the cause of death, and debate over the ongoing military campaign.

In contrast, I've been living in the US for more than 5 years now (although currently away from the states) and watching US news like CNN for much longer, and when four soldiers die in Iraq, it's just another day. And when news outlets attempt to memorialize fallen soldiers, conservative critics (and the Bush administration) criticize them for undermining morale.

As a result, military casualties in Canada create a much larger and longer-lasting affective penumbra (i.e., it's felt more strongly and the sadness lingers). So, making fun of Canadian soldiers after 4 of them have just died is more likely to be offensive than if the tables were turned. And chiding Canadians to be less sensitive about these deaths doesn't go over well, either.
posted by LMGM at 2:10 AM on March 25 [4 favorites]

I can't imagine the media shitstorm that would happen if the roles were reversed. Fox would be setting up an entire fucking channel to carry the outrage if another country mocked dead US soldiers.
posted by fullerine at 2:48 AM on March 25 [1 favorite]

I live close to a Canadian forces base, and know quite a few of the guys there.

They are about the least boo-ya folk you can imagine.

They are also the ones you want on your side in a shooting war.
posted by unSane at 3:56 AM on March 25 [4 favorites]

mhoye : "So the question that Canadians had, and in a lot of ways still has, is simple. Is this how you treat your friends? And if so what good is it, being your friend?"

Didn't Kissinger say, that America has no friends, only interests?
posted by mannequito at 4:08 AM on March 25

That Napoleon guy won the odd battle here and there. Until he invaded Russia in winter. Rookie mistake.

Never start a land war in Asia.<sup>1

1</sup> Okay, Napoleon never reached the Asiatic portion of Russia. But it's the most famous classic blunder.
posted by XMLicious at 4:25 AM on March 25

One of the things that got me was the slightly long-haired guy who was trying to be funny all the time, comparing US cops to Mounties. Now, having lived in Canada for a while, I'm reasonably sure that not all police wear red and ride horses, but moving past that it seemed to be a point of pride for him that the US cops drove armoured cars and wore bullet-proof vests.

So is essence, he's bragging about the high levels of crime, and especially gun crime, in the US.

Secondly, I love how they had to drag in Sarah Palin. Should she be worried? Will the Russians invade through a now powerless Canada?

And then I looked at a map, and realised that Alaska borders Russia as well as Canada, so really the Russians would probably avoid going through Canada when they could just invade Alaska directly.

But why would they want to? It's not the Cold War.
posted by djgh at 4:46 AM on March 25

Hey guys! I've got an idea. It seems squirrelatarianism isn't resonating with voters like I was hoping, but I have a new plan. Here it is: instead of discussing the facts and benefits of squirrel-eating, I'll construct a phony identity debate. It's beautiful: I attack non-squirrel-eaters as gay or something. "Liberals" and the usual suspects complain. Suddenly we're fighting, and people pick sides based on an identity story I can partly choose, rather than (and here's the sneaky thing) exclusively eating squirrel.

The more they complain within the confines of the phony fight I set up, the more they reinforce the phony fight! It's a win-win! Hell, it's an infinite dimensional vector of win!

Simple, eh? I call it the slice strategy. I would'a called it the wedge strategy, but squirrel-loving european cheeses come in wedges. American cheese comes in slices.
posted by ~ at 5:14 AM on March 25

I would love to sentence all those idiots who work for Fox News to a tour of the Canadian Parliament building. They might learn something.
posted by QIbHom at 5:43 AM on March 25

Today, the Fauxian gang was referring to Obama as "Vladimir Obama."
That Gutfeld guy is one of the creepiest people on TV.
posted by etaoin at 6:36 AM on March 25

I liked Lewis Black's take on this on CBC radio Tuesday. He wanted to know what a Canadian was doing watching Fox News at 3am anyway. Seriously... an overnight Fox News "comedy" show gets this much play? Boy, I bet their ratings skyrocketed after this.

Nobody's mentioned the Highway of Heroes here yet? Unlike Bush's media ban on returning coffins, we've been publicly honouring our fallen, each and every one, in about as public a way as possible. Hell, if you ask them to die for your country, the least you can do is give them some respect in death.

What bugs me most is the faux apology where they claimed their comments were "misunderstood". Seriously? Point to a comment made, please, and let me know what you meant by it.
posted by GhostintheMachine at 6:38 AM on March 25 [1 favorite]

This topic was, quite honestly, done to death. All Canadian media, all link aggregation media, and some American media carried it. The douchebag has already "apologized" for his idiocy. And yet it has to be brought to MeFi? Why, oh why?

This is the first I've heard of it. If I had no interest in the post I would've just skipped it.
posted by juiceCake at 6:44 AM on March 25

If I hadn't already joined, this would be another five dollars of terrible. Or in my case, £3.40 of terrible.
posted by permafrost at 7:14 AM on March 25

Really, this should not come as a surprise to anyone who pays attention to where "socialist" Canada fits into the conservative world-view vis-a-vis the "change" people supposedly voted for back in November. As long as Canada is held up to US voters as a social welfare system that more-or-less works, especially when it comes to healthcare reform, I'm afraid conservative outlets such as FoxNews are going to keep Canada in the shit-throwing crosshairs.
posted by Thorzdad at 7:59 AM on March 25

Anyone know any other events at local malls that I can get canceled by threatening physical violence because the comic alluded to Canada as being a haven for draft dodgers and peace/traquility?
posted by boost ventilator at 8:57 AM on March 25

FOX News represents the image of America overseas, whether we like it or not.

I think some image of FOX News now represents what Americans watch (and perhaps believe) to those overseas, but the actual American news that reaches abroad is CNN. (unless that has changed)

There really is no reason for their country to help us in our illegal colonial wars. They should pull their military out of there now. For that matter, they shouldn't have helped Bush in the first fucking place.

Part of the context here is that Canadians generally (I believe) do not see Afghanistan as "helping Bush". We were clear on staying out of both Vietnam and Iraq. Either slagging us for being in Afghanistan, or worse, for doing nothing there, is infringing a record that Canadians generally feel pretty proud of (and at the same time, ever-sensitive about, when we now have politicians in power who would have liked a very different record).

Nobody's mentioned the Highway of Heroes here yet? Unlike Bush's media ban on returning coffins, we've been publicly honouring our fallen, each and every one, in about as public a way as possible.

That is probably the best response to this nonsense.

Come to think of it, how the fuckity fuck does George Bush, who is absolutely a war criminal, get a free pass into Canada?

Yeah, really. But like it or not, we are not the Netherlands.
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 9:13 AM on March 25

I'm afraid conservative outlets such as FoxNews are going to keep Canada in the shit-throwing crosshairs.

The strangest part of that strain of conservative analysis is that strictly in terms of the values of our respective elected leaders (which is problematic for any number of reasons), Stephen Harper is well to the right of Barack Obama on most issues.

I honestly thought that the "Blame Canada" stuff from the US right wing might tone down when the Conservatives came into power, but I just found another example of the notion that the US right wing is generally unconcerned with the truth.
posted by Deep Dish at 9:14 AM on March 25

infringing a record? Bah. Slighting a record.
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 9:15 AM on March 25

Malor : Hey, um, Canada? If you were to send your effete, Capri-pants soldiers to kick Fox News' collective ass, quite a number of us would be just fine with that.

And, it would be fun to watch the follow-up, where a FOX reporter with a black eye grimly warned us of the newest threat to America; the Canadian Menace. That we should learn to fear this Northern horde that could unexpectedly sweep down across our, far too porous border and put the lives of every respectable American at risk from a savage, completely unwarranted beating.

All while showing off the terrifying capri pants of their media-hostile shock troops.
posted by quin at 9:46 AM on March 25 [3 favorites]

I think it's funny that there's outrage over this nonsense on metafilter when 23 dead Polish soldiers and over 5000 Polish troops in Iraq and Afghanistan never prevented that nation from being a socially acceptable butt of jokes here.
posted by loquax at 9:51 AM on March 25

Come to think of it, how the fuckity fuck does George Bush, who is absolutely a war criminal, get a free pass into Canada?

I would say that if it is anyone responsibility to arrest Bush it is the American's.
posted by edgeways at 9:55 AM on March 25

That Napoleon guy won the odd battle here and there. Until he invaded Russia in winter. Rookie mistake.

You know who else invaded Russia in the winter?
posted by oaf at 12:38 PM on March 25

Loquax, the "You forgot Poland!" jokes aren't making fun of the Polish, they're making fun of Bush.
posted by ryanrs at 1:14 PM on March 25

And we get mad in English, which happens to be the same language spoken on Mefi. If Polish people get mad about something, they'll probably complain in their native tongue and we might never hear about it. These days the Internet makes geography irrelevant, but language barriers are still as steep as ever.
posted by Kevin Street at 1:40 PM on March 25

Yeah, Greg Gutfeld is a nobody. The dog barks, the caravan passes. It rankles though when haircut gets his own show and says crap like this. Rob Furlong (the Canadian sniper alluded to several times above) made a hell of a shot, yeah. And Anaconda was a pretty rough operation. Furlong and his sniper team I understand killed at least 20.
But...his outfit is "Princess Patricia's Canadian light infantry" - so I get the basis of the joke there. And if y'all remember Perry, who was one of the team, got accused of improper conduct for crapping on a corpse and mutilating bodies.
Just an ugly mess really, anyway. War.
I s'pose it makes it all the worse that some asshat like Gutfeld makes comments like that. How the hell would he know anything about the Canadian military, their operations, performance, anything? Sure the U.S. military is unparalleled. How did he contribute to that? Beyond maybe not cheating so much on his taxes when he finds time off from working on his hair.
Not like that's not going to change. The Mongols were bad asses. So were the Romans. They're where now?
But yeah, this just makes the ugliness uglier. And all the worse delivered by some smirking prettyboy.
posted by Smedleyman at 2:43 PM on March 25

"And France has never won a battle ever. Unless you count that little hoo-ha at Yorktown."

Only if you also discount 1066, 1214, 1429!, 1745 (over the combined Anglo-Austrian-Dutch-Hano troops, 1758, 1884, etc. ad nauseum.

So ya, basically bullshit. See specifically here and here.
posted by Mitheral at 6:05 PM on March 25

Princess Patricia's Canadian light infantry

That's nothing. Over here we've got a 23rd Tutu Repair Brigade.
posted by turgid dahlia at 6:16 PM on March 25

Loquax, the "You forgot Poland!" jokes aren't making fun of the Polish, they're making fun of Bush.

Really? How is it making fun of Bush unless Poland's contributions are insignificant to the point of absurdity? In the debate, Bush said that Kerry forgot Poland when listing countries with more than 1000 troops in Iraq. What is the joke other than who gives a damn whether or not Poland is there? But by all means, continue to trash fox news for making fun of Canada. Pity we don't have more Polish members with friends and family serving with NATO in Afghanistan.
posted by loquax at 6:44 PM on March 25

Loquax, I think you've misinterpreted. It's more along the lines of (paraphrasing):

"Out of 195 countries in the world, there's, like, two that agree with you."

"Ha! There's not two, there's THREE! You forgot a whole country, Mr. Smartypants!"

Bush is being made fun of for thinking that adding one more country to a ludicrously short list makes a massive difference worthy of a *gotcha!* zinger. Poland is not being mocked here.
posted by kyrademon at 7:11 PM on March 25 [4 favorites]

re: "Why was George Bush given a free pass into Canada, being a war criminal and all"

We have a conservative administration right now; they tend to look out for their own.
posted by tehloki at 12:57 PM on March 26

I've rethought my previous statement thus:

I don't think they're confused about it, frankly. I do believe they simply find cruelty funny.

I realize that conservatives generally have the view that most people can pull themselves up by their bootstraps regardless of circumstances or actions of others, provided they try hard enough. The antipode is liberals generally having the view that circumstances and actions of others are sufficient to prevent people from pulling themselves up by their bootstraps regardless of how hard they try.

The actual truth is somewhere in between, of course. A digression.

So, someone with the conservative viewpoint will find humor in those masses of people who fail to bother pulling themselves up by their bootstraps. Meanwhile, someone with the liberal viewpoint will find humor in those masses of people who seek to oppress others.

The result? Conservatives make fun of the weak. Liberals make fun of the powerful. There are a lot more weak people in the world than powerful people, and nobody likes seeing themselves or their peers made fun of. That's why comedians who make fun of themselves are the most popular; they're they only people on the planet not being made fun of at that moment by the comedian (unless he or she has a twin.)

So: the larger masses of weak people consider powerful people making fun of them to be cruel. The smaller masses of powerful people consider weak people making fun of them to be pathetic. This gets us to the view that conservative humor is viewed as cruel by liberals (and the weak), and liberal humor is viewed as pathetic by conservatives (and the powerful.)

Finally, of course, your jokes have to appeal to the widest possible base in order to make the most money for you as a comedian. Since most people are weak, most comedians make fun of the powerful (or themselves) to maximize their income. If they choose to make fun of the powerful instead of themselves (someone like Bill Hicks, or George Carlin, for example) they're likely to develop a more dedicated fan base and generate more publicity to offset the reduction in overall audience size; presumably it's a wash. The profit-maximizing strategy is to mock themselves and the powerful, and so unsurprisingly that's what most comedians do.

So, whither conservative comedy, whose audience base is likely to be much, much smaller? Well, the only comedians who would take that route are those for whom profits are less important than ideology (ie the powerful, who are most likely to be wealthy), and the only outlets that would support them are those for whom profits are less important than ideology, or whose fan base is smaller but more dedicated. Fox News is a perfect outlet by this criteria, and if they also care about profits, they can put such comedians on late at night (when profits are typically low anyway, the poor/weak will be sleeping, and the wealthy/powerful can set their DVRs.)

Overthinking it, yeah, but it works out pretty well.
posted by davejay at 4:17 PM on March 26

Ahem: "...actions of others are can be sufficient..."
posted by davejay at 4:23 PM on March 26

This is late, but as someone above mentioned the Highway of Heroes, see for yourself.
posted by aclevername at 11:13 PM on March 28