The art of Garnet Hertz

April 11, 2009 6:26 PM

Play the life simulator.

By Garnet Hertz, an artist who makes things about the internet, digital technology, and the experience of using computers.

Via reddit.

Garnet's work has been linked to on metafilter previously.

posted by idiopath (34 comments total)

As an antithesis to corporate internet ideals, The Simulator proposes that easy navigation, usefulness, and factual information should not be the goal of all websites. Without the information noise and jungle, the web would be reduced to a dry, sterile marketing spam-center.

But what about the corporate water?
posted by Inspector.Gadget at 6:29 PM on April 11, 2009 [2 favorites]

Isn't this life simulator from 5 years ago or something? It seems to me I flipped that burger before and it wasn't because I worked at McDonald's.
posted by czechmate at 6:30 PM on April 11, 2009

Isn't this life simulator from 5 years ago or something?

Yeah, this thing is definitely covered in some serious cobwebs. But it still depresses me.
posted by Uppity Pigeon #2 at 6:33 PM on April 11, 2009 [1 favorite]

Rise and shine, campers, cause it's Groundhog Day!
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 6:48 PM on April 11, 2009 [1 favorite]

See also.
posted by Pants! at 6:52 PM on April 11, 2009 [1 favorite]

Very realistic for me at least; I'm the only guy I know who would make the Big Macs with that degree of care. Perfect. In the wild, they are always slapped together by people who patently don't care about even distribution of the component ingredients.
posted by longsleeves at 6:53 PM on April 11, 2009

Good catch east manitoba, I searched but obviously not hard enough.
posted by idiopath at 6:53 PM on April 11, 2009

if i can't hit the snooze button three times, i'm not interested..

I'm thinking my kid wrote something like this in basic on an old TI back in the 90's
posted by HuronBob at 6:59 PM on April 11, 2009

Pants!: "See also."

Now that was a life simulator. You can play it online here. (Previously) (More previously)
posted by Rhaomi at 7:02 PM on April 11, 2009 [5 favorites]

'm the only guy I know who would make the Big Macs with that degree of care.

If you make 5 burgers a day they'd better be perfect. And cold.
posted by swift at 7:09 PM on April 11, 2009

Corporate ideals? I had a choice between five brand-name real hair products and five brand-name real cereals and no option to not choose them.
posted by scratch at 7:10 PM on April 11, 2009 [1 favorite]

In the wild, they are always slapped together by people who patently don't care about even distribution of the component ingredients.

"Craftsmanship" and "BigMac" just don't belong in the same sentence, like "Taliban" and "Balloon" It just seems wrong.
posted by mattoxic at 7:32 PM on April 11, 2009

How do I level up?
posted by EatTheWeek at 7:50 PM on April 11, 2009

tl;dlive
posted by WolfDaddy at 7:52 PM on April 11, 2009 [2 favorites]

like "Taliban" and "Balloon" It just seems wrong.

or so, so right.
posted by longsleeves at 7:57 PM on April 11, 2009

Seriously, any life simulator that forces you to apply hair gel is completely ridiculous.
posted by selfnoise at 8:12 PM on April 11, 2009

Seriously, any life simulator that forces you to apply hair gel is completely ridiculous.

And for me, any life simulator with 8:00 as the default wake up time is like a luxurious fantasy; usually I have been at work for an hour by 8:00 am and if I have a day off, my daughter makes sure we are awake between 7:00 and 7:30. What is this snooze button I am reading about? Perhaps I will use my AskMe for this week to find out.
posted by TedW at 8:19 PM on April 11, 2009

Yeah and what's with this showering shit, anyway?

STOP LOOKING AT ME!
posted by not_on_display at 8:28 PM on April 11, 2009

STOP LOOKING AT ME!

Oh, now I see it says not_on_display.

Anyway, now that I have played the game a few more times, I feel like eating a few Big Macs and then catch a little HGTV before bed.
posted by TedW at 8:37 PM on April 11, 2009

Stood in a too-hot shower, didn't get burned. Ate 4 bowls of cereal, didn't get full or have to poop. Seriously, maybe I'm so disillusioned that I can't appreciate this thing's earnestness. I can't help but think that if Lore Sjoberg did this, there'd be hilarious consequences.
posted by explosion at 9:12 PM on April 11, 2009

No option for no hair gel. FAIL
posted by Balisong at 9:22 PM on April 11, 2009

I think about this every once in a while and I'm glad to see it again.
posted by Kattullus at 9:22 PM on April 11, 2009

Jean shirt?
posted by regicide is good for you at 9:39 PM on April 11, 2009

It's from 1997! I think I remember it doing the rounds in about 2000 or something... it was a "Cool Site of The Day" after all.
posted by so_necessary at 1:08 AM on April 12, 2009

It's no Jones In The Fast Lane that's for sure.
posted by PenDevil at 1:27 AM on April 12, 2009 [2 favorites]

The best life simulator I've encountered remains Mirek's Cellebration. I've wasted quite a bit of time on that one.
posted by JHarris at 1:41 AM on April 12, 2009

That must be what Don Gorske dreams about.
posted by BrotherCaine at 4:45 AM on April 12, 2009

My life is already an incredible simulation, thanks.
posted by FelliniBlank at 6:48 AM on April 12, 2009

I love that "Hometime" is one of your television show options. That is like sooooo 1998.
posted by sararah at 10:16 AM on April 12, 2009

Here are some links that I enjoy (sparkly unicorn graphic).
posted by autodidact at 10:40 AM on April 12, 2009

That made we want a big mac.
posted by sharpener at 11:14 AM on April 12, 2009

1997, huh? Think of all the things that hadn't happened yet when this was life.
posted by rusty at 11:45 AM on April 12, 2009

 X
  X
XXX 

posted by Pronoiac at 4:18 PM on April 12, 2009 [1 favorite]

I worked at McDonalds when I was a kid. Dreaming about making hamburgers I count as some of the worst nightmares I've ever had.
posted by Smedleyman at 1:36 PM on April 13, 2009