Two All-Beef Patties, Special Sauce, Deep Fried Criminal, McCurry, Snooty Starbucks, Dr Pepper, an Unconvicted Buy and a PETA Party on a Sesame Seed Bun

May 1, 2009 2:42 PM

A drive-thru robber gets 'fried with that' when McDonalds employee dumps hot oil on him. In other news, McDonalds lost its right to use "Mc" as a trademark - at least in Malaysia where "McCurry" fought back, McDonald's "McCafe" coffee is hurting Starbucks so Starbucks is (indirectly) fighting back with new ads, you'll soon be able to get Dr Pepper at all Mickey D's (and Mr.Pibb is not fighting back), Goldman Sachs dropped the fast foodery from a "Convicted Buy" to a mere "Buy" and, ho hum, PETA's doing an anti-McDonald's campaign (aren't they always?)

It's McMay Day at McMetaFilter!
previously, previously, previously...
But seriously, it's been a NOT slow news day for the fast food giant, and maybe Mcdonald's should just fling a bucket of hot oil at McCurry, Starbucks, Goldman, PETA and Mr.Pibb...

posted by wendell (39 comments total)

I'm not familiar with this restaurant.
posted by SpiffyRob at 2:44 PM on May 1, 2009 [5 favorites]

HOLY MULTI-LINK STUNT POST, BATMAN!
posted by dersins at 2:45 PM on May 1, 2009 [4 favorites]

why would mr. pibb fight his own doctor? most of the other guys are quacks.
posted by the aloha at 2:46 PM on May 1, 2009

A drive-thru robber gets 'fried with that' when McDonalds employee dumps hot oil on him.

But the robbers struck back by sending rotting cow carcasses over the parapets with a trebuchet.
posted by GuyZero at 2:46 PM on May 1, 2009 [3 favorites]

For one day only McDonald's is offering free food coupons to any MeFite who makes an FPP that references their company.
posted by ericb at 2:47 PM on May 1, 2009

Nugent: boiling oil free zones are recipe for disaster - CNN.com
posted by stavrogin at 2:47 PM on May 1, 2009

My nabe is ronald i am aclown. i hvae long feet and if you don't post 5 mcdonalds fpps i will come into YOUR kitchen tonight and make a mess of your pots and pans
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 2:49 PM on May 1, 2009 [4 favorites]

Dammit wendell, a trifecta is limited to three posts! Three! Who ever heard of a quadfecta? Quadrafecta?

Research points to superfecta being a possible option, but this isn't a horse race.
posted by filthy light thief at 2:49 PM on May 1, 2009

I think Superfecta was killed by The Avengers on BBC in 1064.
posted by Astro Zombie at 2:51 PM on May 1, 2009 [1 favorite]

Mr. Pibb is dead. Short live Pibb Xtra!
posted by designbot at 2:51 PM on May 1, 2009

"One of the other staffers ... in the restaurant grabbed some kind of a container ... I don't have the specifics to what type, and ends up throwing what we estimate to be about a litre of boiling oil onto the robber's face, his head and neck"

Tough luck to turn up during Rorschach's shift.
posted by panboi at 2:52 PM on May 1, 2009 [9 favorites]

McFilter.
posted by Effigy2000 at 2:52 PM on May 1, 2009 [1 favorite]

For one day only McDonald's is offering free food coupons to any MeFite who makes an FPP that references their company.

I don't know if this is better or worse than a Whopper Sacrifice. Since we all suffer, I'm going with worse.
posted by filthy light thief at 2:52 PM on May 1, 2009

McHow McMuch McMore McViral McMarketing McDoes McMetafilter McPlan McTo McDo McToday?
posted by tkchrist at 2:55 PM on May 1, 2009

I have no horse in this race, and any reference to McDonald's in my most recent post is purely coincidental and an accident.

Which is to say that I was indeed worried that this would happen, but only after I made my post and then realized there was a McDonald's reference in the post prior to mine.

Which is a complicated way of saying WHAT THE FUCK!?
posted by loquacious at 2:57 PM on May 1, 2009

like that dumb lady that spilled McDonald's coffee on her lap then sued them
posted by jabberjaw at 2:58 PM on May 1, 2009

There's about this much news about McDonald's every day.
posted by twoleftfeet at 3:03 PM on May 1, 2009

Police are now looking for a South Asian male, about six feet tall, 20 to 25 years old, with burns on his hands, neck and face. shorter version of Darkman.
posted by Inspector.Gadget at 3:03 PM on May 1, 2009

I think Superfecta was killed by The Avengers on BBC in 1064.

Impossible, as he captained a corps of Norman crossbowmen at Hastings only two years later.
posted by dersins at 3:03 PM on May 1, 2009 [3 favorites]

I miss the elephants!
posted by ericb at 3:08 PM on May 1, 2009

As a long-time fan of Douglas Adams, I believe all trilogies should have more than three parts.
posted by wendell at 3:08 PM on May 1, 2009 [3 favorites]

I knew Mr. Pibb was a wimp! His lack of an advanced degree was just the beginning!
posted by tommasz at 3:15 PM on May 1, 2009

I believe this post is worth about fifty sugar cubes, but not much else.
posted by mhoye at 3:15 PM on May 1, 2009

Goldman actually publishes a "Conviction Buy" list. But should probably publish both.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 3:15 PM on May 1, 2009

Meanwhile, if this isn't quite enough tasty PR goodness, how about a big scoop of Michael Vick, Future PETA Spokesmodel?
posted by FelliniBlank at 3:21 PM on May 1, 2009

like that dumb lady that spilled McDonald's coffee on her lap then sued them

I know! Idiot! Suing just because McDonald's served her dangerously hot coffee that, when spilled, caused " full thickness burns (or third-degree burns) over 6 percent of her body, including her inner thighs, perineum, buttocks, and genital and groin areas. She was hospitalized for eight days, during which time she underwent skin grafting." And to think that after a tiny incident like that, she wanted $20,000 in compensation from one of the world's richest companies. Ridiculous! Just suck it up, lady!
posted by Pater Aletheias at 3:22 PM on May 1, 2009 [9 favorites]

McDonald's robber gets fried, not fries, with his order

Ah, nothing like making light of second degree grease burns. He was a robber though, so the fact that he is now permanently disfigured (or at the very least in for some delightful skin-grafts) makes it hilarious.
posted by slimepuppy at 3:26 PM on May 1, 2009

A drive-thru robber gets 'fried with that' when McDonalds employee dumps hot oil on him.

In other news, Walter Kovacs was named employee of the month. When asked to say a few words to mark the award ceremony, Kovacs said, "You don't get it. I'm not earning minimum wage with all of you. You are all earning minumum wage with me."
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 3:26 PM on May 1, 2009 [5 favorites]

But that's just what Starbucks is doing in a new ad campaign that includes the slogans, "Starbucks or nothing. Because compromise leaves a really bad aftertaste," and, "Beware of a cheaper cup of coffee. It comes with a price."

"Lots of companies small and large have kind of gone to school on us, telling their story at the expense of Starbucks'," Schultz said in a video filmed at two Seattle Starbucks stores and posted on the company's Web site. "The time has come for Starbucks to tell its story."

That's fucking ridiculous. Everyone with some sense knows that coffee, even good coffee is cheap. To suggest that Starbucks overpriced crap is somehow really worth more is absurd. It's all about "lifestyle".
posted by delmoi at 3:28 PM on May 1, 2009

Diet Dr Pepper! My fave, and hard to find in fast food joints; I applaud the effort to bring it to my local McD's.

Although given my local's poor quality control on their Diet Coke formulation (too much syrup; too little syrup; too flat) I fear for my experience.

(Costco also consistently mucks it up too, although they do have the fun of the "click-click-click" stripey dispensers. Aren't the Coke people supposed to be gung-ho about checking up on their vendors?)
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 3:32 PM on May 1, 2009

Starbucks coffee tastes terrible. That being said, the McCafes aren't that great either. The mocha in particular is horrendous. Tastes like a three hershey bars drowned in a cup of drip.
posted by Captain Cardanthian! at 3:38 PM on May 1, 2009

Starbucks coffee does not taste terrible. Ahh, opinions.

It is overpriced. But whatever, it's my money, I'll do what I wish with it...
posted by Pantengliopoli at 3:50 PM on May 1, 2009

I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet Dr Pepper.
posted by steef at 3:50 PM on May 1, 2009 [1 favorite]

There's got to be a drop left in one of these dozen cans on my window sill. Help yourself.
posted by Pantengliopoli at 3:52 PM on May 1, 2009

Starbucks coffee does not taste terrible.
Who's over there that smirking? Peet or Major Dickason?
posted by Bernt Pancreas at 3:56 PM on May 1, 2009

Ah, nothing like making light of second degree grease burns. He was a robber though, so the fact that he is now permanently disfigured (or at the very least in for some delightful skin-grafts) makes it hilarious.

Not to me. I think the employee who did that should face assault charges. There are some things you don't do, and intentionally burning people is one of them, not for something as damn petty as robbery.

Shoot the guy if you have to use deadly force for some reason or another, but hot oil? Not on the menu for civilization.
posted by weston at 3:59 PM on May 1, 2009

Doesn't the 2nd amendment inply the right to bear oil?
posted by Postroad at 4:11 PM on May 1, 2009

Doesn't the 2nd amendment inply the right to bear oil?

Yes, but the Founding Fathers could not have imagined the potency of bear oil modern technology has provided us with. And they would have been appalled at the carnage produced by kangaroo oil, which was of course unknown in the 18th century outside of Australia.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 4:21 PM on May 1, 2009

I'm not one to usually pile on with the Starbucks hate mobs, but may I proffer an intense lolwut at their new campaign? If you want to convince consumers to spend more on, ahem, "speciality coffees" during an intense recession, why would you base it on the fact that your coffee tastes like scorched shit? Their beans are fair trade, aren't they? Why not focus on the ethical cost of McDonald's coffee rather than a falsity so easily dismissed with a sip of their espresso?
posted by youarenothere at 4:27 PM on May 1, 2009