Han is leaving the cantina.

May 4, 2009 7:11 AM

Where are you in the movie? If we started a movie on the day you were born, and stretched it over your lifespan, this is where you’d be in that movie.
posted by 40 Watt (82 comments total)

I'm in the middle of the "Yellow Brick Road" dance sequence. Neat ;)
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 7:15 AM on May 4, 2009

Ferris is also making a phony lunch reservation, Venkman is meeting Dana at the fountain, the Dude is hanging out at Maude's place and Dorothy and the Scarecrow are meeting the Tin Man.
posted by 40 Watt at 7:18 AM on May 4, 2009

From MeFi's Own™ condour75.
posted by burnmp3s at 7:18 AM on May 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

Obi-Wan just cut Ponda Baba's arm off.
posted by Faint of Butt at 7:22 AM on May 4, 2009

Cameron is really worried about Ferris' impersonation of Abe Froman, Sausage King of Chicago.
posted by Spatch at 7:23 AM on May 4, 2009

i hope that i live to the credits so i can see who to thank and who to blame.
posted by the aloha at 7:24 AM on May 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

These are not the droids I'm looking for.
posted by Decimask at 7:25 AM on May 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

The biopic projects; and, having screened,
Moves out of theaters, onto DVD
And no one will forget you flubbed that line,
Nor all your crying ever change that scene.
posted by The White Hat at 7:25 AM on May 4, 2009

I am in the training montage.
posted by zerobyproxy at 7:25 AM on May 4, 2009

Oh, look, Chewy is getting a medal! That means that I...

aaarrrggghhhh...
posted by Mister_A at 7:27 AM on May 4, 2009 [14 favorites]

Walter Peck being made to say please! Auuuugh!
posted by LN at 7:34 AM on May 4, 2009

Hey cool, the probe droids are landing on Hoth!

uh oh.
posted by PlusDistance at 7:37 AM on May 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

obi-wan is still alive. so i guess i've got that going for me.
posted by fuzzypantalones at 7:42 AM on May 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

Great. Walter just tossed his dirty undies and the phone is about to ring nonstop. I can't wait until my 50s when I finally help Julianne Moore conceive.
posted by alzi at 7:43 AM on May 4, 2009 [3 favorites]

Don't do it, George!
posted by chococat at 7:44 AM on May 4, 2009

Lebowski is at the bar drinking an oat soda.

Sorry, did I say Lebowski? I mean El Duderino.
posted by Astro Zombie at 7:46 AM on May 4, 2009

Luke is practicing with his lightsaber on the Falcon. It has left Tattoine!

This is when the realization sets in - I am too old to begin the training.
posted by never used baby shoes at 7:53 AM on May 4, 2009 [3 favorites]

Sorry, did I say Lebowski? I mean El Duderino.

So you're not into the whole brevity thing?
posted by DecemberBoy at 7:54 AM on May 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

Ferris's dad's hand is on the taxi door handle.
posted by emelenjr at 7:55 AM on May 4, 2009

I haven't seen the movie in a while. I think Scarecrow is asking the great and powerful Oz for a br....


ouch
posted by Kronos_to_Earth at 7:57 AM on May 4, 2009

Her life was in my hands.
posted by dogwalker at 8:05 AM on May 4, 2009 [2 favorites]

Currently, three skiving kids are driving down the highway in a red convertible and nobody is holding onto the steering wheel. If this is a metaphor for my life, I may not make it to the baseball game.
posted by Sova at 8:09 AM on May 4, 2009

Proton packs FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!
posted by greekphilosophy at 8:10 AM on May 4, 2009

God, what boring scenes are these!

They should rename this thing the Mid-Life Crisis Generator.
posted by etc. at 8:18 AM on May 4, 2009 [4 favorites]

For a slightly better guess, check out the actuarial life table to see your life expectancy given age and gender.
posted by goingonit at 8:22 AM on May 4, 2009

This is appropriate as the Mos Eisley cantina is a pretty accurate metaphor for my life so far.
posted by slimepuppy at 8:25 AM on May 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

Hunh. For me, the luckless scanning crew is about to go aboard the Falcon, followed by the two stormtroopers ("Hey,can you give us a hand up here?") and probably sometime around Thanksgiving, some officer will start to wonder why TK-421 isn't at his post.

However, my 14-month-old godson can still see the opening paragraphs receding into the distance. Oh, young fellow, you have so much ahead of you.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 8:26 AM on May 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

Ha, I am telling Darth Vader that his feeble old religion is dying. Funny thing, I do a lot of that in real life, too.
posted by parmanparman at 8:28 AM on May 4, 2009 [2 favorites]

I'm gonna have to re-watch all these movies to figure out which part I'm in now. Thanks a lot, 40 Watt!

Well... except for Big Lebowski. But still!
posted by orme at 8:28 AM on May 4, 2009

Hah, in Ghostbusters, I'm at the part of Ray's ghostly blowjob where he crosses his eyes and achieves, uh, release.
posted by robocop is bleeding at 8:30 AM on May 4, 2009

I was at the star wars sequence in Ferris Bueller. Don't cross the streams!
posted by prodigalsun at 8:36 AM on May 4, 2009 [5 favorites]

My entire life so far has been a guy walking slowly towards the horizon (I am basing this on Satantango).
posted by Falconetti at 8:41 AM on May 4, 2009

The word itself makes some men uncomfortable. Vagina.
posted by gaspode at 8:51 AM on May 4, 2009

Luke has just left the bar and is about to get on with the rest of his life. Fitting.
posted by Uncle Ira at 8:55 AM on May 4, 2009

Zool seems to be coming out of the refrigerator; I am not sure what to think about this.
posted by kittens for breakfast at 9:07 AM on May 4, 2009

Whew. OK, it's cool. The Millennium Falcon has just been caught in the tractor beam. Plenty of time.
posted by Cool Papa Bell at 9:07 AM on May 4, 2009

(Or wait no...that's one of the dog statues. I actually have no idea what that scene is. Is it maybe just a random establishing shot? That's kind of a letdown.)
posted by kittens for breakfast at 9:09 AM on May 4, 2009

Yeah sorry for the shittiness of the ghostbusters frames... I have to redo that one.
posted by condour75 at 9:14 AM on May 4, 2009

I'm trying to talk Walter Sobchack out of using his dirty undies as a ringer. Awesome.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 9:14 AM on May 4, 2009

I'm about to pass out in a field of poppies.
posted by rtha at 9:17 AM on May 4, 2009

Actually this made me feel much better about myself.
posted by penduluum at 9:21 AM on May 4, 2009

I don't know how long my lifetime is going to be. No one has told me.
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 9:22 AM on May 4, 2009

It's a shame this isn't endowed with prognosticative abilities. Hey, it's great to be young and -- credits?! -- WT-

.

Looking forward to trying this out at home on a not-locked-down computer.
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 9:23 AM on May 4, 2009

No joke: This is my current position in The Wizard of Oz. Shit.
posted by Rhaomi at 9:25 AM on May 4, 2009 [3 favorites]

Oh man. That's a big Twinkie.
posted by scrowdid at 9:26 AM on May 4, 2009

I am stormtrooper's ass years old and feeling every one of them.
posted by The Bellman at 9:37 AM on May 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

My grandmother's finished watching Star Wars and is about 13% into The Empire Strikes Back.
posted by Devils Slide at 9:39 AM on May 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

In what I can only hope is a weird coincidence, but probably is not given how the day is going, I am also Rooney's ass years old. And feeling every one of them, too.

Seriously, what's with the butt shots?
posted by The Bellman at 9:41 AM on May 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

That's pretty awesome, Rhaomi.
posted by Mister_A at 9:42 AM on May 4, 2009

I'm in the Cantina of life but I still don't know who shot first.
posted by Pollomacho at 9:43 AM on May 4, 2009

Ok, that's pretty cool: I have my forehead pressed up against the window in the Sears Tower. Nice visual.
posted by Pax at 9:49 AM on May 4, 2009

Walter will be staying and finishing his coffee soon.

Enjoying his coffee.
posted by anthom at 10:01 AM on May 4, 2009

As predicted for someone of my quite dull age, the Millennium Falcon is making preparations to leave Tatooine.
posted by ob at 10:02 AM on May 4, 2009

I also learned why my last relationship failed: the previous girl is apparently Han confronting Jabba in the docking bay. Ah, she was a Special Edition type. If she had told me that early one, it could have saved me some heartache.

My parents are apparently unidentifiable pilots from Red Squadron, but how many of us cannot say that?
posted by ricochet biscuit at 10:14 AM on May 4, 2009

Poppies. Poppies will put them to sleep. Sleeeeep!!11!!
posted by Heretic at 10:29 AM on May 4, 2009

The Dude is in the car smoking a doob and looking like life is good.
posted by matildaben at 10:45 AM on May 4, 2009

Walter is telling the Dude he can get him a toe.

Nice.
posted by grubi at 10:54 AM on May 4, 2009

I don't know why this thread is so jovial. I am painfully aware that I am going to die. I need a drink.
posted by marmaduke_yaverland at 10:57 AM on May 4, 2009

Hey, careful, man, there's a beverage here!
posted by brand-gnu at 11:22 AM on May 4, 2009

Wu peed on my rug, man.
posted by grubi at 11:28 AM on May 4, 2009

Holy crap. Some of you guys are either incredibly young or are going to live until you're 150.

Leia's just been rescued...(Do not go gentle into that good ventilation shaft. / Rage, rage against the running of the credits!).
posted by yoink at 11:34 AM on May 4, 2009

Haha, at 25 I'm @ 0:33:25 in The Wizard of Oz and strangely.. that's kind of how I truly feel right about life right now :-J
posted by pyrex at 11:41 AM on May 4, 2009

Andre is still talking about some boring bullshit.
posted by one_bean at 11:43 AM on May 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

EXACTLY.
posted by Sys Rq at 11:53 AM on May 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

Holy crap. Some of you guys are either incredibly young or are going to live until you're 150.

I had a hard time plugging in *any* number for how old I'll be when I die because dude, maybe it'll be tomorrow. I have no idea. So, I went with family history. I plugged in 95 as my end point as my youngest great-grandmother was 90 when she died, the other three were 100, and my great aunt who had recurring brain tumors also made it to 90.

My family is those little old ladies Eddie Izzard talked about who just refuse to die.
posted by grapefruitmoon at 12:40 PM on May 4, 2009

The Dude drinking a Caucasian at the bowl-a-drome.

Sure feels like it, too.
posted by kuujjuarapik at 12:59 PM on May 4, 2009

The goddamn plane has crashed into the mountain.

Fortunately, some new shit has come to light, so I'm pretty sure things are gonna work out pretty good for the Dude.
posted by gompa at 2:24 PM on May 4, 2009

Just added 2001: A Space Odyssey.
posted by condour75 at 3:46 PM on May 4, 2009

It's great time to be alive, what with all my first act climaxes happening.
posted by HeroZero at 4:53 PM on May 4, 2009

The Dude is picking up his trashed car at the impound lot. Shortly he's going to ask the police if they have any leads. Evidently they have a whole squad of detectives working on the case.

Continuing the sorta down nature of these, Han is asking Luke if a Princess like her and a guy li...

No.
posted by Ghidorah at 4:56 PM on May 4, 2009

George Bailey is in the taxi with a wad of cash, preparing to stop the run on the bank. On one hand, a generally energetic & positive image. On the other hand, the fact that It's A Wonderful Life is the only movie I remember in much detail is making me feel older than dirt.

Ooh - ooh - do Raising Arizona too!
posted by selfmedicating at 5:09 PM on May 4, 2009

And Die Hard! (duh)
posted by ericbop at 5:39 PM on May 4, 2009

This should really be a 50-year set of calendars. July - in the bar. August - still in the bar. etc. etc.
posted by xorry at 5:52 PM on May 4, 2009

Well, I'm 3/8ths of the way to dead. Thanks, website.
posted by Eideteker at 5:58 PM on May 4, 2009

From the look on his face, Chewie appears to have just sat in something nasty in the Cockpit of the Millennium Falcon. He'll be able to find out what in 2.8 days.
posted by Miss Otis' Egrets at 6:20 PM on May 4, 2009

I want them to add The Princess Bride. Severely.
posted by redsparkler at 12:08 AM on May 5, 2009

But what if I died tomorrow? I don't want credits to be the last thing I see...
posted by Petrot at 5:44 AM on May 5, 2009

For those of you who felt a slight disturbance in the force: The seconds-till-next-second had a math glitch, fixed now, so you might get different results on when the next frame shows. It was counting the remainder backwards.

Redsparkler: As you wish. It's a perfect choice. Maybe late today.
posted by condour75 at 6:01 AM on May 5, 2009

It's good to have a dream come true. Thanks, condour75. Thanks bunches.
posted by redsparkler at 12:49 PM on May 5, 2009

They're throwing the ferret in my bathtub. This is exactly what's happening to me in my cubicle, right now!!!
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 2:29 PM on May 5, 2009

I liked that Ferris Beuller was one of the movies. I am at the ballpark.
This is really a neat concept.
posted by will wait 4 tanjents at 8:32 PM on May 5, 2009

And Titanic and The Godfather have been added.

In Titanic, Jack and Rose are steaming up some windows. In The Godfather, Michael is sitting down with Sollozzo and McCluskey.

For some reason, those two scenes make me feel better about being at the half-way points of the movie. However, I don't think I'd like using the scenes from Titanic for very much longer.
posted by never used baby shoes at 11:50 AM on May 13, 2009