But it SOUNDS better when you reword it...

May 13, 2009 1:37 PM

Luke, I am your father. FTFY. Some of the most beloved lines quoted from the movies are not as they originally appeared, and movie rental site LOVEFiLM.com surveyed its members for the most memorable misquotes. Darth Vader's number one, with The Wicked Queen, Dirty Harry and Captain Kirk among the top ten. filmsite.org made a more comprehensive list, with .wavs to back them up.

If you can believe Wikipedia (and who does, anymore?), you can add "Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?" to the list.

And I didn't link directly to LOVEFiLM because they don't have anything about the survey on their own site. And I really looked. And it pissed me off.

posted by wendell (51 comments total)

Does anyone really think it's "“Frankly, Scarlett, I don't give a damn?" I've never seen it and I know it's "my dear."
posted by ALongDecember at 1:43 PM on May 13, 2009

Intended Youtube Link
posted by ALongDecember at 1:43 PM on May 13, 2009

Right, right. I suppose next up you'll be trying to convince us that the original quote wasn't "This won't wendell" either.... ;)
posted by zarq at 1:46 PM on May 13, 2009 [1 favorite]

SPOILERS. Jeez.
posted by Astro Zombie at 1:46 PM on May 13, 2009 [2 favorites]

And yes, I know I'm going to the SPECIAL hell for that one.
posted by zarq at 1:47 PM on May 13, 2009

And a misquote from the first link: Real fans will of course know that it was "No, I am your father" delivered by David Prowse in the jaw-drop moment that has been eternally misquoted since its release in 1980.

Isn't it James Earl Jones who actually delivers the line?
posted by bendybendy at 1:47 PM on May 13, 2009 [5 favorites]

Play it again, Sam.
posted by mudpuppie at 1:50 PM on May 13, 2009

Not only that, Prowse was told to say "Obi-Wan is your father." It's wrong TWICE.
posted by grubi at 1:50 PM on May 13, 2009 [1 favorite]

Isn't it James Earl Jones who actually delivers the line?

The script was kept secret, so Prowse went with a blatant pickup line about wielding Luke's pants saber. It was later dubbed out, of course.
posted by Burhanistan at 1:51 PM on May 13, 2009

Yes, Bendybendy. A lazy writer just looked up "actor who played Darth Vader' to finish his sentence. Also true that George digitally changed the line in post, which is one of the more clever things he's done.

Whatever happened to the clever George Lucas, anyway?
posted by rokusan at 1:53 PM on May 13, 2009 [2 favorites]

How I have simultaneously longed and dreaded to be That Guy who corrects people's off-the-cuff movie quotes, including that one. Yoda gets raped even worse. "Away with your weapon", SERIOUSLY?

Maybe I can leave them an anonymous passive-aggressive note after the fact with this site's URL on it.
posted by jake at 1:57 PM on May 13, 2009

Wait -- "Obi-Wan *killed* your father." My bad.

</irony>
posted by grubi at 1:58 PM on May 13, 2009

I also thought 'Chinese whisper effect' was 'telephone effect', but have apparently been wrong all these years.

Seriously, who came up with 'Chinese whisper'?
posted by six-or-six-thirty at 1:58 PM on May 13, 2009 [1 favorite]

I was surprised that "we have ways of making you talk" antedated World War II. I've always heard it as "vee heff vays of making you talk" and referring to Nazis.

Some of these are pretty pedantic. Sherlock Holmes may not have said "Elementary, my dear Watson!" in the books, but he did say "elementary" and "my dear Watson." "Play it again, Sam" is an emended version of a line in Casablanca that was used on two spoofs of Casablanca.

And the misquotes sometimes are better. "Badges? We ain't got no badges. We don't need no badges. I don't have to show you any stinkin' badges!" (And I'm not convinced that criticizing the fealty of a parody makes a lot of sense.) "I've got a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore" sounds more natural to modern ears than "I've a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore" (and besides, I've usually just heard "we're not in Kansas anymore" as the quote).

the name Louis mis-spelled as Louie

I'm shocked--shocked!--to find that nicknaming is going on in here.
posted by kirkaracha at 2:01 PM on May 13, 2009

Since none of the news sites have, I put together the Top Ten Misquotations AND the way they were actually originally said:
1. WRONG: “Luke, I am your father”, RIGHT: “No, I am your father” – Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back (1980)
2. WRONG: “Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?”, RIGHT: “Magic mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?” - Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937)
3. WRONG: “Do you feel lucky, punk?”, RIGHT: "You've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do ya punk?" - Dirty Harry (1971)
4. WRONG: “Play it again, Sam”, RIGHT: ""You played it for her, you can play it for me...If she can stand it, I can. Play it!" – Casablanca (1942)
5. WRONG: “Hello, Clarice”, RIGHT: “Good evening, Clarice” – Silence of the Lambs (1991)
6. WRONG: “Beam me up, Scotty!”, RIGHT: "Scotty, beam me up!" – Star Trek: The Motion Picture (1979)
7. WRONG: “Frankly, Scarlett, I don't give a damn”, RIGHT: “Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn” – Gone with the Wind (1939)
8. WRONG: “If you build it, they will come”, RIGHT: “If you build it, he will come” – Field of Dreams (1989)
9. WRONG: “I don't think we're in Kansas anymore, Toto”, RIGHT: "Toto, I've a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore." – The Wizard of Oz (1939)
10. WRONG: “Mrs. Robinson, are you trying to seduce me?”, RIGHT: "Mrs. Robinson, you're trying to seduce me. Aren't you?" – The Graduate (1967)

You may thank me later.
posted by wendell at 2:02 PM on May 13, 2009 [7 favorites]

Note to self: Thank wendell later.
posted by Antidisestablishmentarianist at 2:09 PM on May 13, 2009 [1 favorite]

Thanks, wendell!

too soon?
posted by yhbc at 2:12 PM on May 13, 2009 [2 favorites]

No love for Howard Beale in Network?

WRONG: I'm mad as hell, and I'm not gonna take it anymore!
RIGHT: I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore!
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 2:13 PM on May 13, 2009 [3 favorites]

Does anyone really think it's "“Frankly, Scarlett, I don't give a damn?" I've never seen it and I know it's "my dear."

This one might have something to do with the Carol Burnett Show parody, though the last line in that sketch is actually "Frankly Miss Scarlet, I don't give a damn".
posted by Atom Eyes at 2:14 PM on May 13, 2009

Alas poor Yorick, I knew him well Horatio
posted by Afroblanco at 2:16 PM on May 13, 2009 [2 favorites]

The one I always hear misquoted is "There's a fine line between stupid and clever" (as "clever and stupid"), from Spinal Tap.
posted by dfan at 2:17 PM on May 13, 2009

Play it again, Sam. him out, keyboard cat.
posted by desjardins at 2:22 PM on May 13, 2009 [5 favorites]

I hardly think the Snow White one counts, since it was "Mirror, Mirror" in the Grimms' original.
posted by Johnny Assay at 3:10 PM on May 13, 2009 [1 favorite]

WRONG: This is what happens when you find a stranger in the alps.
RIGHT: This is what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass.

Note: Debatable.
posted by Dr-Baa at 3:41 PM on May 13, 2009 [7 favorites]

I just came in to say how much I love Casablanca. Cheesy, schmaltzy, and oh, so perfect.

Thank you later, wendell!
posted by Devils Rancher at 3:43 PM on May 13, 2009 [1 favorite]

Seriously, who came up with 'Chinese whisper'?

Probably some Indian giver.
posted by spoobnooble at 3:55 PM on May 13, 2009

8. WRONG: “If you build it, they will come”, RIGHT: “If you build it, he will come” – Field of Dreams (1989)

I believe the former line is from the oft-confused "Field of Reams", which is on a completely different shelf at Blockbuster.

(Hint: it's right next to "Forrest Hump" and "Fill Bill")
posted by rokusan at 3:58 PM on May 13, 2009

"The goggles, they do nothing!" is a pretty big one, though it's TV.

Also, who says “I don't think we're in Kansas anymore, Toto”?

I've never heard that one.
posted by ODiV at 4:01 PM on May 13, 2009

Wait -- "Obi-Wan *killed* your father." My bad.

But that's true... from a certain point of view.
posted by rokusan at 4:02 PM on May 13, 2009

Ve have .wavs of making you talk...
posted by you just lost the game at 4:08 PM on May 13, 2009 [3 favorites]

Well, if you just go around saying "I am your father" people won't get the Star Wars reference. It looks like a lot of the "popular" quotes have been modified from the original by adding a character's name so that they make sense outside of the movie they come from.
posted by madcaptenor at 4:29 PM on May 13, 2009 [3 favorites]

I believe the former line is from the oft-confused "Field of Reams", which is on a completely different shelf at Blockbuster.

Blockbuster doesn't have a "special" shelf because they're "family-friendly".
posted by madcaptenor at 4:30 PM on May 13, 2009

WRONG: Never-Neverland RIGHT: Neverland
posted by Liquidwolf at 4:49 PM on May 13, 2009

WRONG: Cat in danger
posted by Beautiful Screaming Lady at 5:14 PM on May 13, 2009

Upon further review, you DON'T have to thank me. I'm grateful that nobody attacked me for using the much-hated "FTFY" in the original post. (I'm not doing as well at getting myself in trouble here as I used to.)

But "this will not wendell" IS a misquoting of "this will not end well", right?
posted by wendell at 5:20 PM on May 13, 2009

Blade Runner:
WRONG: I'll tell you about my mother.
RIGHT: Let me tell you about my mother.

Pulp Fiction:
WRONG: I'll execute every one of you motherfuckers.
RIGHT: I'll execute every motherfucking last one of you.

Hey, wait a minute...
posted by Dr-Baa at 5:39 PM on May 13, 2009 [3 favorites]

I'm grateful that nobody attacked me for using the much-hatedloved "FTFY" in the original post.

FTFY
posted by DU at 5:51 PM on May 13, 2009 [2 favorites]

Luke, I am your father, le-li-lo-la...
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 6:09 PM on May 13, 2009

Okay, this isn't from a movie but a book, but similar in that it's passed so thoroughly into popular culture that absolutely everyone calls it, erroneously, 'My' Pet Goat, rather than The Pet Goat. I think subconscious we all assume it's George W.'s pet goat, that at the moment when we needed him to look like a leader, like Churchill or Roosevelt, he looked like an especially dim-witted farm boy.
posted by tula at 7:10 PM on May 13, 2009 [1 favorite]

I always love things like this because they consitently give examples where I didn't know a line in a movie was a tribute to an earlier movie. Like: "(Hey!) I'm walking here! I'm walking here!"' I did not know that in Back to the Future that's a nod to Midnight Cowboy.
posted by Mitheral at 7:50 PM on May 13, 2009

I have to agree that sometimes, the Wikipedia-like editing of thousands of people improves a line, or at least reduces it to its necessary elements. So what if "Play it again, Sam" never actually appears in the movie? It perfectly evokes the film in a way that the shorter, accurate version doesn't.

It's similar to the way that a foreign phrase enters the language. It takes on a life of its own. What English speaker would ever pronounce "lingerie" LANN zhuh REE? Nobody would know what you said. Requiring that a quote which has entered the culture as idiom to conform precisely to the original can rob it of its context or power.
posted by dhartung at 8:58 PM on May 13, 2009 [1 favorite]

Blockbuster doesn't have a "special" shelf because they're "family-friendly".

I didn't need another reason to hate Blockbuster, but there it is anyway.
posted by rokusan at 9:36 PM on May 13, 2009

In fact, no Star Trek episode contains the words "Beam me up, Scotty." (video, NSFW, Robot Chicken)
posted by zippy at 10:11 PM on May 13, 2009

What English speaker would ever pronounce "lingerie" LANN zhuh REE?

I usually hear it as "LANN zhuh RAY", but prefer "LIN gerr ee" as a humorous pronunciation.
posted by explosion at 3:46 AM on May 14, 2009

That'll do, donkey pig, that'll do.
posted by Devils Rancher at 4:57 AM on May 14, 2009

Heh. My nephew claims he can recite the dialogue from Pulp Fiction from start to finish; the other day he said, "Check out the brain on Brad!"
I said "Dude, it's Brett," and he was like "No, it's Brad."
We both got it wrong: it's "Check out the big brain on Brett."
posted by Restless Day at 5:15 AM on May 14, 2009

RIGHT: I'll execute every motherfucking last one of you.

I *think* it's the above at the beginning (prologue) of the film, but at the end of the film they obviously had to use a different take and I'm pretty sure she says the line differently.

Heads off to Youtube to prove the veracity of this claim
posted by Jofus at 5:38 AM on May 14, 2009

Interesting: (from here)

" * The dialogue in the restaurant scene at the beginning of the movie changes in what is supposed to be the same scene at the end. In the first scene Honey Bunny shouts "Any of you fucking pigs move and I'll execute every motherfucking last one of you!" But at the end this changes to "Any of you fucking pigs move and I'll execute every one of you motherfuckers!". This almost seems too obvious to be unintentional. - Mathew Franks

"A lot of people think this was probably a mistake. It has also been thought by some that Tarantino was showing us the difference between perceptions of different people in the diner, the second time being Jules' perception. It is interesting to note that in a early version of the script the difference isn't there, but it was added in a later version." - QT FAQ"

And, with that burst of anality, I'm outies!
posted by Jofus at 5:57 AM on May 14, 2009

Ummm....that should be pricks - not pigs - above.
posted by Jofus at 5:58 AM on May 14, 2009

You know, I always remembered it as 'pricks', but now that I listen to the clip it sounds more like 'pigs' to me. Well, really it sounds like 'picks', but given the choice of two words to translate that into, I'd go with 'pigs'.

The weird thing is, I had always heard the full line as "Ante up, you fucking pricks! Move! Or I'll execute every motherfucking last one of you!" ("Ante up" in the sense of "hand over the money".) The odd stress she puts on 'move' makes it totally sound like an order to me, and I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around this "new" version of it. Such weird intonation for that sentence.
posted by rifflesby at 8:01 AM on May 14, 2009

"Note to self: Thank wendell later."

This isn't going to wendell. In fact if it does wendell.... no, wait.
posted by Smedleyman at 12:57 PM on May 14, 2009