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Sign of the time, so out of line
June 2, 2009 8:35 PM   RSS feed for this thread Subscribe

National Geographic's photographic history of monkeys in space.
posted by Joe Beese (15 comments total) 4 users marked this as a favorite

That's right, motherfuckers, my name is Ham and I'm a hawt astronaut.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:39 PM on June 2


Yeah, Ham likes it when the doctor touches his monkey.
posted by Brandon Blatcher at 8:40 PM on June 2


Huh. I was just thinking about this given the recent Laika/Gagarin cosmonaut mock kerfuffle.

Bookmarked for the morrow. Thanks.
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 8:45 PM on June 2


Sadly, Able died a few days later during surgery to remove an infected electrode.

Able was preserved after her death and is currently on display inside her cradle at the National Air and Space Museum in Washington, D.C.


How does an electrode get infected? Isn't that like saying your computer got infected with a physical virus? Oh dear gods ... she had the spaaaace sicknesssss. And to add insult to injury, her space-coffin cradle became her earth coffin.

.
posted by filthy light thief at 8:55 PM on June 2


Ham was not a monkey.
posted by Tube at 9:15 PM on June 2 [2 favorites has favorites]


John Prine - Space Monkey

Space Monkey, Space Monkey
What you doing out there?
Why it's dark as a dungeon way up in the air

Come gather round me you little monkeys and a story I'll tell
About a brave young primate, outer space knew him well
He was born at the top of a big old tree
Way back in 1953.

He could swing through the jungle and hang by his toes
Till they took him to Russia cause they could I suppose
They dressed him up in a spacesuit and it started to snow
Shot him off in a rocket where no man would go

Space Monkey Space Monkey
What you doing out there?
Why it's dark as a dungeon way up in the air
There'll be no one to greet you when you get back home
No hammer or sickle you'll be on your own.

He had plenty of Cuban bananas and loads of Spam
But he found great difficulty trying to open the can
One day he slipped on a banana peel and the ship lost control
It spun out of orbit and shot out the black hole

It's been four decades now, that's nine monkey years
That's a long time for a Space Monkey to confront all his fears

Space Monkey Space Monkey
What you doing out there?
Why it's dark as a dungeon way up in the air
There'll be no one to greet you when you get back home
No hammer or sickle you'll be all on your own.

Space Monkey, Space Monkey
It's time to get real
The space race is over, how does it feel
Cold War's had a heatwave, Iron Curtain's torn down
They've rolled up the carpet in Space Monkey town

Now Leningrad is Petersburg and Petersburg's hell
For a card-carrying monkey with a story to tell
The Space Monkey was reportedly last sighted about
A half a block off of Red Square
In a karaoke bar having a few drinks with some of his friends
There was the dog that flew Sputnik
And a blind red-headed, one legged parrot
Who had done some minor research for Dow Chemical
They were drinking American Vodka
Imported all the way from Paducah, Kentucky
And reportedly had their arms around each other's
Shoulders singing.
"Those were the days, my friend, we thought they'd never end"

Space Monkey, Space Monkey
There's nothing to do
But it's better than living in a Communist zoo
There'll be no one to greet you when you get back home
No hammer or sickle you'll be all on you own
posted by netbros at 9:18 PM on June 2 [1 favorite has favorites]


In addition to monkeys, animals that have gone into space in the name of science include dogs, cats, fruit flies, rabbits, turtles, spiders, jellyfish, and amoebas.

I hope the spiders and jellyfish were not on human flights, or at least were triple-secured.

Humans + zero-gravity + spiders/jellyfish = goddamn nightmare city
posted by brain_drain at 9:21 PM on June 2 [3 favorites has favorites]


Monkeys in SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE!!!
posted by blue_beetle at 9:26 PM on June 2 [2 favorites has favorites]


Is this not some sort of late return to Monkey News?
posted by jimmythefish at 9:33 PM on June 2 [1 favorite has favorites]


Fun fact: The first primate to orbit the Earth was Yuri Gagarin.
posted by gubo at 10:27 PM on June 2 [1 favorite has favorites]


I, for one, can't wait for all the great-great-great grandchildren to return from space, to signal the beginning of a beautiful new era of space-monkey-jellyspider goodness.
posted by rokusan at 12:38 AM on June 3


Is this not some sort of late return to Monkey News?

I presume all the spacecraft in which these monkeys travelled were outfitted with banana dispensers.
posted by greycap at 2:12 AM on June 3


monkey asks: why blow up the moon?
posted by yonation at 7:48 AM on June 3


At 11:35pm on June 2, 2009, the internet became completely aligned with my brain.
posted by ericbop at 8:11 AM on June 3


"Well, Yank, we just wanted to see what monkeys were like in space."
posted by McLir at 5:28 PM on June 3


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