What do lobbyists do?

July 29, 2009 7:38 PM

Colonel Muammar al-Gadaffi, Leader and Guide of the Revolution, has been consulting with two US-based PR / lobbying companies—The Livingston Group (Sourcewatch) and Monitor (Sourcewatch)—to effect the rebranding of Gadaffi's Libya as a desirable and trustworthy ally of the United States. Confidential documents from these consultations have been obtained and posted online by a Libyan opposition group called NCLO. They include fee quotes, progress reports, and mission plans, as well as a personal tutorial curriculum for Gaddafi's son. Via LRBlog

Gadaffi's official website.

posted by stammer (27 comments total)

I love it. America bombs his country (and his family) in 1986 and now, 22 years later, he's ever closer to achieving ... well, what exactly?
posted by philip-random at 7:42 PM on July 29

It's not going to work. America remembers history Back To The Future.
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 7:48 PM on July 29 [3 favorites has favorites]

Well, what the hell. Probably no worse than many other dictators we support. Wasn't the Livingston Group tied to some really nasty stuff? On preview: Yes.
posted by atchafalaya at 7:49 PM on July 29

I would like to offer myself as an expert in Introductory Truck-Bombing, as well as Basic Disco Explosives and Political Murder:101.

Couple hundred grand a year is all I ask. Buy now, and I'll throw in a two-week intensive course on slaughtering the families of your enemies for free! Complete with detailed rape instruction!
posted by aramaic at 7:59 PM on July 29

Does this strike anyone else as kind of completely insane? A nation that seems to harbor dreams of global hegemony having it's decision making influenced, and in some cases completely short circuited by lobbyists on behalf of foreign powers? I mean, I don't recall other massive empires who let their foreign policy be swayed by slick hucksters employed by foreign princes. Hell lobbyists payed by Georgia had McCain talking as if the cold war was about to resume.

Christ, it's a good thing the Russia doesn't seem to have the good sense to hire lobbyists, and a well connected PR firm. They'd probably be able to get the US to give Alaska back.
posted by Grimgrin at 8:11 PM on July 29 [2 favorites has favorites]

Wish I'd read this before making the post: How are you supposed to spell Muammar Gaddafi/Khadafy/Qadhafi?
posted by stammer at 8:15 PM on July 29

Also, he wears pictures.
posted by Stonestock Relentless at 8:25 PM on July 29 [1 favorite has favorites]

I've always wondered why Saddam had to go while Qaddafi became best buds with us.

I think it was the Q-man was willing to play ball, while Saddam was more a Nasser, and we can't have that.
posted by @troy at 8:29 PM on July 29

Also. Female bodyguards FTW.
posted by @troy at 8:31 PM on July 29

Go Speed Racer! GO!
posted by oddman at 8:33 PM on July 29

Only tangentially related, but geektastic: The regexp that matches all the known spellings of Qadhafi's name.
posted by idiopath at 8:35 PM on July 29 [8 favorites has favorites]

posted too soon.

I think "M[ou]'?am+[ae]r .*([AEae]l[- ])?[GKQ]h?[aeu]+([dtz][dhz]?)+af[iy]" should be taken on as the official canonical spelling of his name.
posted by idiopath at 8:38 PM on July 29 [7 favorites has favorites]

A nation that seems to harbor dreams of global hegemony having it's decision making influenced, and in some cases completely short circuited by lobbyists on behalf of foreign powers?

The US Govt is run for the benefit of lobbyists. Your complaint seems to be that these lobbyists are in the pay of foreign powers. What are you, some kind of racist?
posted by pompomtom at 8:47 PM on July 29 [1 favorite has favorites]

Does this strike anyone else as kind of completely insane? A nation that seems to harbor dreams of global hegemony having it's decision making influenced, and in some cases completely short circuited by lobbyists on behalf of foreign powers? I mean, I don't recall other massive empires who let their foreign policy be swayed by slick hucksters employed by foreign princes.

Really? It seems like having your son or daughter marry into the royal family of another country was all the rage back in the day. I'm sure there was plenty of diplomatic intrigue in history. The only interesting this is the open buying and selling of interests. I wonder when these lobbying firms will IPO so we can all get a piece of the action. Maybe we can create a market for corruption derivatives.

Also, McCain's chief foreign policy adviser had been a paid lobbyist for Mikheil Saakashvili before the campaign. Is it any surprise McCain got so animated about it?
posted by delmoi at 9:42 PM on July 29

Holy shit his female bodyguards are from fucking COBRA.
posted by Avenger at 11:17 PM on July 29

Also, he wears pictures.

Doing research I found that that's a picture documenting the capture of Islamic freedom fighter Omar al-Mukhta by the Italians in 1931, which Qaddafi chose to wear on his first visit to Rome.

Stay classy, Muomar.

In just three days, Mukhtar was tried, convicted, and, on September 14, 1931, sentenced to be hanged publicly (historians and scholars have questioned whether his trial was fair or impartial[1]). When asked if he wished to say any last words, Mukhtar replied with a Qur'anic phrase: "From Allah we have come, and to Allah we will return."

posted by @troy at 11:38 PM on July 29

Gadaffi? No. Too negatative. Think more Gadaffcan!
posted by The Whelk at 12:19 AM on July 30

With the slicked hair, the golden tan, eyeliner and military chic, Gadaffi looks like he's started to be styled by Gok Wan. Maybe they should turn Libya into a Gay Holiday Destination - But then there's the murderous Revolutionary Guard that might object to that idea.
posted by Faustino at 1:19 AM on July 30

I mean, I don't recall other massive empires who let their foreign policy be swayed by slick hucksters employed by foreign princes.

To name only a scant few examples, there were the The Habsburgs, the Medici, the Romanovs, the exploits of Sir Francis Drake under the auspices of Queen Elizabeth, the Entente Cordiale, the Shah of Iran, the Ottomans, the Xuantong, the Ptolemaic Dynasty and the Shōwa.
posted by Smart Dalek at 2:31 AM on July 30 [2 favorites has favorites]

Works for Israel.
posted by fourcheesemac at 2:40 AM on July 30

Foreign Affairs covered the trend towards the privatization of diplomacy not too long ago - Diplomacy Inc.
posted by ruelle at 2:49 AM on July 30

I'm relieved to see that the tutorial for his son doesn't include a style section. Don't change a thing, Mu'tasim!
posted by timeo danaos at 3:32 AM on July 30

I don't see this trend as 100% bad for the world.

Sample consultation:

Dictator-for-life: So, how do I get people to stop thinking of me as a dangerous crazy?

Consultant: Um, yes. Well, a good starting point is to stop doing dangerous crazy shit.

Unfortunately, the clients too often go for option #2 - whoring out to the west, and holding their country's legs in the air as the multinationals pound away.
posted by Artful Codger at 5:07 AM on July 30 [1 favorite has favorites]

And who can forget Gadaffi: The Musical!
posted by Damienmce at 6:13 AM on July 30

This is a very common practice. Larger US PR firms, ad agencies and branding consultants may be hired by a country for any number of reasons. Usually it's done to encourage American tourism.

What's truly neat about this is we're getting a peek behind the scenes. The language and strategies in "A Proposal for Expanding the Dialogue around the Ideas of Muammar Qadhafi" (pdf) are carefully tailored, yet almost textbook in presentation.
posted by zarq at 7:58 AM on July 30

You know, the 21st century isn't working out like I thought it would.
posted by Guy_Inamonkeysuit at 10:29 AM on July 30

You know, the 21st century isn't working out like I thought it would.

I know! It's even weirder! Trust me, the jet-pack moon-city 20th Century is much more dull.
posted by The Whelk at 6:40 PM on July 30