Play God in the bedroom.

August 4, 2009 9:38 AM

NSFW: Genesis, a high concept line of sex toys, one for each of the days of Creation. (via, previously)
posted by yiftach (33 comments total)

I was hoping for an "Invisible Touch" sex toy. Ah, well.
posted by everichon at 9:41 AM on August 4, 2009 [4 favorites]

If this is at all successful, I'm gonna do a Noah's Ark themed line of toys.
posted by boo_radley at 9:44 AM on August 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

"Yanko Design"
posted by Combustible Edison Lighthouse at 9:46 AM on August 4, 2009

These guys did it right.
posted by Thorzdad at 9:47 AM on August 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

I was hoping for an "Invisible Touch" sex toy.

Yeah, then they could make a "Land of Confusion" one.

And then, uh..."Mama"?

:-/
posted by adamdschneider at 9:48 AM on August 4, 2009 [3 favorites]

I know and was thinking about Divine Interventions when I put together the post, Thorzdad. Why didn't I link to them?
posted by yiftach at 9:50 AM on August 4, 2009

/sort of derail

I have been wanting these for a long time.

/underail

I really want to be interested in BDSM, but it just doesn't seem to float my boat. The candle wax dripper, well that looks pretty cool.

The obligatory link to !NSFW! this site.
posted by Xoebe at 9:50 AM on August 4, 2009

Dang it Thorzdad! You beat me to it!
posted by Xoebe at 9:51 AM on August 4, 2009

I don't think the "Misunderstanding" toy would be a big seller. Ditto the "No Reply At All".

But I bet the "Trick Of The Tail" toy would be instantly popular.
posted by hippybear at 9:57 AM on August 4, 2009

Just watch out for the old "immaculate conception".
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 10:01 AM on August 4, 2009

Pepsi Spooge
posted by I Foody at 10:14 AM on August 4, 2009

I don't think the "Misunderstanding" toy would be a big seller. Ditto the "No Reply At All".

But I bet the "Trick Of The Tail" toy would be instantly popular.

I REALLY want to know what the "Squonk" one would look like.

Not so much "Dance On A Volcano".
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 10:20 AM on August 4, 2009

Merely foolish.
posted by rdone at 10:48 AM on August 4, 2009

I hear a lot about God in the bedroom.
posted by Dr Dracator at 10:52 AM on August 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

Someone smarter than me make a Star Trek II joke, please!
posted by sourwookie at 10:57 AM on August 4, 2009

Turns out The Man On The Corner wasn't a toy at all.
posted by Sailormom at 11:00 AM on August 4, 2009

I was hoping for an "Invisible Touch" sex toy. Ah, well.

Careful. You don't want to go In Too Deep.
posted by katillathehun at 11:23 AM on August 4, 2009

I'd buy one called "Driving the Last Spike".
posted by tybstar at 11:34 AM on August 4, 2009

The one called "That's All" is probably on the small side...
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 11:36 AM on August 4, 2009

Gross, this is all covered with sussudio.
posted by maxwelton at 11:36 AM on August 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

Is there any symbolism to the fact that that dildo is the size of that dude's arm?

There's something very Catholic about that...
posted by cmoj at 11:42 AM on August 4, 2009

Someone smarter than me make a Star Trek II joke, please!

pr00000n!!!
posted by adamdschneider at 12:01 PM on August 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

If the Lamb Lies Down On Broadway, it may not get back up again.
posted by jquinby at 12:11 PM on August 4, 2009

"Jesus he knows me" would fit right in with the theme... but... well, I'll leave it to the professionals to design that one...
posted by Kimothy at 12:12 PM on August 4, 2009

I'm going to jump in here and say that while the craftsmanship on these pieces is fairly impressive, overall the set fails to live up to its theme. I say this as an artist who does a lot of thematic interpretive artwork. The biggest problem is that there's very little visual and textural commonality in these pieces. And while it's easy to write text to bind things together analytically, what is much more important is for set pieces to have a greater gestalt that becomes apparent only when they are viewed as a group.

Also, that cock ring is way too small.
posted by seanmpuckett at 12:12 PM on August 4, 2009

Someone smarter than me make a Star Trek II joke, please!

All I've got is a mental image of Ricardo Montalban holding up a DVD case and screaming "This is Sweaty Asshole V!"

I'll just show myself out.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 12:14 PM on August 4, 2009 [3 favorites]

...and now that's all I've got. Thanks, Mr Eponysterical.
posted by Dormant Gorilla at 12:50 PM on August 4, 2009

God is probably turning over in his grave right now.
posted by doobiedoo at 12:52 PM on August 4, 2009 [1 favorite]

"Cock Ring: black ebony from Gabon. Hand made."

You got your Williams-Sonoma in my adult bookstore! You got your adult bookstore in my Williams-Sonoma! Two great tastes that, surprisingly, actually kinda do go well together. From a comedy standpoint, anyway.

Any cock'll dooooooo!
posted by DecemberBoy at 5:14 PM on August 4, 2009 [2 favorites]

The choice of colors is very particular: The blue sky representing Virgin Mary. She is often depicted with a blue coat called maphorion. Green is also used to represent the Virgin with the Child Jesus. The red roses are a symbol of virginity. Blind fold inspired by the stole of the priest.
Blue silk and silk embroidered from St Gallen, Switzerland (Haute Couture).

That blindfold looks yellow to me. Am I stupid? Colorblind? Is anyone else confused?
posted by Faint of Butt at 5:35 PM on August 4, 2009

Well, if we're going for the Genesis tie-ins, you gotta go with "The Musical Box".
posted by Ber at 6:28 PM on August 4, 2009

mefi just isn't the same without the img tag. :(
posted by jeffburdges at 4:23 AM on August 5, 2009

Any cock'll dooooooo!

This year the winter storms have left us overstocked... (nsfw audio)
posted by phirleh at 8:12 AM on August 5, 2009