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August 26, 2009 2:14 PM Subscribe
Psychologist Nick Troop has performed a "psycholyrical analysis" of David Bowie's 26 albums and used his findings, along with text analysis software Linguistic Inquiry and Word Count, to write the "ideal" Bowie song (YT, 8:54; skip to 4:23 if you just want to hear the song). (See also.)
You can't fool me. That's Paul Bettany.
posted by Astro Zombie at 2:21 PM on August 26, 2009
posted by Astro Zombie at 2:21 PM on August 26, 2009
Hi, Doctor Nick!
posted by brain_drain at 2:22 PM on August 26, 2009 [2 favorites]
posted by brain_drain at 2:22 PM on August 26, 2009 [2 favorites]
That's really hitting an all time low.
Apparently the ideal Bowie song is a horrible self indulgent post-Earthling number.
posted by bunnytricks at 2:24 PM on August 26, 2009
Apparently the ideal Bowie song is a horrible self indulgent post-Earthling number.
posted by bunnytricks at 2:24 PM on August 26, 2009
Apparently the ideal Bowie song is a horrible self indulgent post-Earthling number.
Needs a little bit of Drum and Bass!
posted by Artw at 2:28 PM on August 26, 2009 [2 favorites]
Needs a little bit of Drum and Bass!
posted by Artw at 2:28 PM on August 26, 2009 [2 favorites]
How will this affect the value of my Bowie bonds?
posted by Joe Beese at 2:32 PM on August 26, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by Joe Beese at 2:32 PM on August 26, 2009 [1 favorite]
I analyzed Bowie's album covers for use of color. I noted that a particular combination of colors was present in his most successful albums and then I went ahead and reproduced them. I ate a three month old chinese take out meal that I found under the stairs in an abandoned building, then I located a picture of O'Reilly's falafel and threw up copiously in a mixture of colors that closely resembled those on his most successful album covers. I took a polaroid photo of this.
I am considering sending it to Bowie together with the song by Nick Troop. Maybe DB can sing the song and use my cover and dominate the charts world wide for the next 60 years.
posted by VikingSword at 2:33 PM on August 26, 2009 [2 favorites]
I am considering sending it to Bowie together with the song by Nick Troop. Maybe DB can sing the song and use my cover and dominate the charts world wide for the next 60 years.
posted by VikingSword at 2:33 PM on August 26, 2009 [2 favorites]
Don't quit your day job. Oh, wait..
posted by doctor_negative at 2:34 PM on August 26, 2009
posted by doctor_negative at 2:34 PM on August 26, 2009
Chubby little loser... national joke... pathetic little fat man... no one's bloody laughing...
posted by You Should See the Other Guy at 2:35 PM on August 26, 2009 [7 favorites]
posted by You Should See the Other Guy at 2:35 PM on August 26, 2009 [7 favorites]
Is it common for psychologists to register a .org for their own work?
he does have an earring though, so he's probably not your typical prof. gosh, I bet he even curses during lecture and totally makes fun of his T.A.s behind their backs!
posted by Think_Long at 2:36 PM on August 26, 2009
he does have an earring though, so he's probably not your typical prof. gosh, I bet he even curses during lecture and totally makes fun of his T.A.s behind their backs!
posted by Think_Long at 2:36 PM on August 26, 2009
Considering Bowie's penchant for using non-standard lyrical writing methods, such as exquisite corpse, automatic writing, and other such things, how on earth can someone do a "psycholyrical analysis" of them? That would be like doing an analysis of that Twitter poem website which was posted recently, although since Bowie used much shorter phrases, not even that coherent at times.
It's a nice idea, but the basic premise shows little understanding of Bowie and his methods.
posted by hippybear at 2:38 PM on August 26, 2009
It's a nice idea, but the basic premise shows little understanding of Bowie and his methods.
posted by hippybear at 2:38 PM on August 26, 2009
It's like the songwriting version of a cargo cult.
posted by stavrogin at 2:40 PM on August 26, 2009 [6 favorites]
posted by stavrogin at 2:40 PM on August 26, 2009 [6 favorites]
The Harrington 1200 already does this quite well (skip to 2:40).
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 2:40 PM on August 26, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 2:40 PM on August 26, 2009 [1 favorite]
I remember seeing an old video of Bowie writing songs, using random words pulled out of a hat, basically... and then scrambling them around until they seemed right.
Seems to me that what this person suggests is taking that kind of careful sculpting of words... sorting it, scrambling it, decoupling it from the fortuitous, appropriate pairings, and spitting it back out again.
Does not work.
posted by markkraft at 2:41 PM on August 26, 2009
Seems to me that what this person suggests is taking that kind of careful sculpting of words... sorting it, scrambling it, decoupling it from the fortuitous, appropriate pairings, and spitting it back out again.
Does not work.
posted by markkraft at 2:41 PM on August 26, 2009
The ideal David Bowie song is actually a photograph of a crossdressing cadaver.
posted by DU at 2:42 PM on August 26, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by DU at 2:42 PM on August 26, 2009 [1 favorite]
See also: Pierre Menard, Author of the Quixote, by Jorge Luis Borges
posted by Ian A.T. at 2:45 PM on August 26, 2009 [3 favorites]
posted by Ian A.T. at 2:45 PM on August 26, 2009 [3 favorites]
Come on guys, some psych prof got to listen to Bowie for weeks and then write a song! This guy isn't a genius for writing this song, he's a genius for playing the system.
Next up: textual analysis of tourist brochures in Hawaii and the "ideal Hawaii tourist brochure".
posted by GuyZero at 2:45 PM on August 26, 2009 [4 favorites]
Next up: textual analysis of tourist brochures in Hawaii and the "ideal Hawaii tourist brochure".
posted by GuyZero at 2:45 PM on August 26, 2009 [4 favorites]
Finally, please remember, while I am a scientist, and while I am using scientific tools and analyses, this is not science so DON'T TAKE IT TOO SERIOUSLY.
Luv on ya
Dr Nick Troop
Aw man, that's sweet. Luv on ya back mate. Personally, I liked your song. I know many are dissing it for being little better than a Markov chain crossed with a generic tune, but I reckon you're much better than Coldplay. I hear David Bowie has heard the song, and in thanks is working on an ideal version of your research papers using theta grids and Roget's Thesaurus. I can't wait!
posted by Sova at 2:45 PM on August 26, 2009 [3 favorites]
Luv on ya
Dr Nick Troop
Aw man, that's sweet. Luv on ya back mate. Personally, I liked your song. I know many are dissing it for being little better than a Markov chain crossed with a generic tune, but I reckon you're much better than Coldplay. I hear David Bowie has heard the song, and in thanks is working on an ideal version of your research papers using theta grids and Roget's Thesaurus. I can't wait!
posted by Sova at 2:45 PM on August 26, 2009 [3 favorites]
Oooh, Ian A. T., what a brilliant pastiche! I read "See also: Pierre Menard, Author of the Quixote, by Jorge Luis Borges" and didn't think much of it. I was pleasantly reminded of a short story that I rather adore, but that was it.
However, a couple comments later I came across your fantastic re-working of it, and was blown away. "See also: Pierre Menard, Author of the Quixote, by Jorge Luis Borges" retained all of the lovely notes of nostalgia from the original, but gained a richness and a depth that the other lacks, not to mention it's ironic nod to Borges and a playful, self-away tone.
(In all seriousness, was that intentional or not!?)
posted by Squid Voltaire at 3:21 PM on August 26, 2009 [1 favorite]
However, a couple comments later I came across your fantastic re-working of it, and was blown away. "See also: Pierre Menard, Author of the Quixote, by Jorge Luis Borges" retained all of the lovely notes of nostalgia from the original, but gained a richness and a depth that the other lacks, not to mention it's ironic nod to Borges and a playful, self-away tone.
(In all seriousness, was that intentional or not!?)
posted by Squid Voltaire at 3:21 PM on August 26, 2009 [1 favorite]
Seems real...or an elaborately long way to go for a hoax. I can see the kind of research Troop has done getting funded by someone like Sony or Universal Music Int., since it's analyzing hit songs to try to determine what makes a hit song. Unfortunately, the result is likely to be even more of the same genrification of music that we suffer through today, where every song on a particular radio station is indistinguishable from every other one.
posted by Jimmy Havok at 3:31 PM on August 26, 2009
posted by Jimmy Havok at 3:31 PM on August 26, 2009
Oh hell YES that was awful.
I prefer Liam Lynch's Fake Bowie Song any day of the week (LGT iTMS, sorry, couldn't find on YT)
posted by kcds at 3:32 PM on August 26, 2009
I prefer Liam Lynch's Fake Bowie Song any day of the week (LGT iTMS, sorry, couldn't find on YT)
posted by kcds at 3:32 PM on August 26, 2009
Frog went did wrong I but I'm seeing the neighborhood bully, like to my
soul hands you be. Po boy but when we the tree; near the doors as We
are looking like I love with laughing and I live by heart she went know
I want to be Forever, with And forsaken? I go ahead.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 4:24 PM on August 26, 2009
soul hands you be. Po boy but when we the tree; near the doors as We
are looking like I love with laughing and I live by heart she went know
I want to be Forever, with And forsaken? I go ahead.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 4:24 PM on August 26, 2009
I did enjoy watching the Airwolf intro in the related vids, though.
posted by Liver at 4:52 PM on August 26, 2009 [1 favorite]
posted by Liver at 4:52 PM on August 26, 2009 [1 favorite]
Meh. That Bettany Doctor is a horrible good. Bowie analyzed your chubby ideal psychologist using cargo. Harrington suggests crossdressing by Hawaii. Jorge - that's Bowie's gnome - was analyzing any chewiness of laughing mortal Airwolf.
posted by Joey Michaels at 6:01 PM on August 26, 2009
posted by Joey Michaels at 6:01 PM on August 26, 2009
i don't think he's taking it that seriously. terrible song, though.
posted by empath at 6:19 PM on August 26, 2009
posted by empath at 6:19 PM on August 26, 2009
There's a "Troop effect" joke in here, but I'm too tired to make it. Something about how you produce something you don't intend to...
posted by knile at 8:53 PM on August 26, 2009
posted by knile at 8:53 PM on August 26, 2009
I thought the "ideal" Bowie song was Anthony Newley's "The Joker" but maybe that's just me.
posted by BYiro at 9:20 PM on August 26, 2009
posted by BYiro at 9:20 PM on August 26, 2009
Wow - that guys needs to employ just a little bit of vibrato if he's going to hold notes for that long...
I'm with GuyZero - this is a great wheeze; the guy's been paid to good off, listen to records, make a YouTube video and perform his "music"... Some of us have to do that shit on our own dime!
posted by benzo8 at 1:32 AM on August 27, 2009
I'm with GuyZero - this is a great wheeze; the guy's been paid to good off, listen to records, make a YouTube video and perform his "music"... Some of us have to do that shit on our own dime!
posted by benzo8 at 1:32 AM on August 27, 2009
Its not the *Ideal* Bowie song - its seems to be the *Average* - the same as if you asked a representative sample of Britons what their idea of the worst night out in the world would be, and then asked him what their idea of the best night out in the world would be.
The point exactly halfway along the resulting line of data would be "Ten Pin Bowling".
And, playing quietly on the stereo when you got there would be the above linked song.
posted by Jofus at 5:59 AM on August 27, 2009
The point exactly halfway along the resulting line of data would be "Ten Pin Bowling".
And, playing quietly on the stereo when you got there would be the above linked song.
posted by Jofus at 5:59 AM on August 27, 2009
".. and we decided to look at current trends in music, and extrapolate from that what we imagined would be the most futuristic music possible."
posted by teresci at 9:26 AM on August 27, 2009 [3 favorites]
posted by teresci at 9:26 AM on August 27, 2009 [3 favorites]
If I've learned anything from this thread, it's that it's fun to pretend to be David Bowie.
Wait, I already knew that.
posted by speicus at 11:53 AM on August 27, 2009
Wait, I already knew that.
posted by speicus at 11:53 AM on August 27, 2009
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posted by kylej at 2:16 PM on August 26, 2009