Smartly, me lassies and lads...

September 19, 2009 9:55 AM

"Arrr!" Avast me hearties! 'Tis that day come 'round again. "Tis ye International Talk Like A Pirate Day. Bring me a noggin of rum, now, won't ye, me matey and celebrate the day.

The idea for the day was hatched "... in 1995 on an Albany, Oregon, YMCA racquetball court. John 'Ol' Chumbucket' Baur, 54, and his friend Mark 'Cap'n Slappy' Summers, 46, began unleashing insults at one another, as pirates." Ye' rest is history.

Ol' Chumbucket, Mad Sally and all the little Chumbuckets have just recently celebrated a full year o' livin'' the pirate's life in the U.S. Virgin Islands.

Previously - 2003 | 2004 | 2005 | 2006 | 2007 | 2008.

posted by ericb (59 comments total)

WHARFOR CAN'T WE ROLL THAT THAR UP WITH CAPSLOCK DAY ARR THEN WE'D HAVE THE PLAYED-OUT MEMES IN ONE PLACE ARR
posted by klangklangston at 9:58 AM on September 19 [10 favorites]

This seems like the perfect day to begin my Atlantic crossing on this ship laden with gold and treasure bound for England! What ho!
posted by Aquaman at 9:58 AM on September 19

Although, next year I'll be introducing "Talk like a zombie day," in which everything sounds like "Glrrar mmmuh braaaaaaaaaainsss."
posted by klangklangston at 9:59 AM on September 19 [2 favorites]

Two resources to help you enjoy the celebration a little bit more: A good pirate tale.... and a pirate supply shop....
posted by blaneyphoto at 9:59 AM on September 19

"At first an inside joke between two friends, the holiday gained exposure when John Baur and Mark Summers sent a letter about their invented holiday to the American syndicated humor columnist Dave Barry in 2002. Barry liked the idea and promoted the day."*

posted by ericb at 9:59 AM on September 19

Am I the only person in the world who thinks it would be more fun if it were only every two years? And christmas?
posted by opsin at 10:00 AM on September 19

Not this again.
posted by xmutex at 10:02 AM on September 19 [4 favorites]

YO-HO-HO PIRATES IMMA LET YOU FINISH BUT INTERNATIONAL HOUSE OF PANCAKES IS THE BEST INTERNATIONALLY-THEMED ANYTHING EVER
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 10:03 AM on September 19 [8 favorites]

Can Keyboard Cat play this idea off?
posted by josher71 at 10:04 AM on September 19

Oh this day again. I only enjoy it because I get to say "in my dialect 'shiver me timbers' makes perfect sense, and people really do say 'aye, pint o beer lass' on a regular basis". It's Talk Like A Pirate Day every day round here.
posted by Sova at 10:06 AM on September 19

International House of Pancakes? That be Long John Silvers favorite place, because of the acronym.
posted by wheelieman at 10:06 AM on September 19 [2 favorites]

No.
posted by everichon at 10:10 AM on September 19 [1 favorite]

Quoth Charles Brown: "Arrrrgh!"
posted by TedW at 10:11 AM on September 19

How are you gentlemen !!
posted by Damn That Television at 10:13 AM on September 19 [1 favorite]

Ahem.

Booty.

That is all
posted by The Whelk at 10:14 AM on September 19 [1 favorite]

In celebration of the day, Telltale Games is offering a free episode of the new Tales of Monkey Island adventure game through midnight PST. Play Like a Pirate Day!
posted by gemmy at 10:14 AM on September 19

Every morning is talk like a zombie morning*.

* until coffee.
posted by Artw at 10:15 AM on September 19

For us year-round pirates, September 19 is Talk Like a Landlubber Day.

Isn't the weather lovely today? I think I'll enjoy a latte out on the veranda.
posted by Faint of Butt at 10:22 AM on September 19 [4 favorites]

This only works if you're not from the South West of England. For those of us that are, it's Speak Proper Like the Queen day.
posted by saturnine at 10:24 AM on September 19 [4 favorites]

It's kind of sad when you can call attention to the fact that you're breaking the rules in the text of the post & get away with it.
posted by scalefree at 10:26 AM on September 19

You mean a double-ish post scalefree? It happens from time to time that annual events (especially if they occur in NY for some reason) will get a pass.

TLAPD has kinda jumped the shark tho.
posted by edgeways at 10:33 AM on September 19

If you need a day, then I feel sorry for you indeed.
posted by Eideteker at 10:34 AM on September 19

Talk like a ninja day: "                                        "
Talk like bacon day: "*pop* *sizzle* *fizz*"
Talk like a robot day: "Beep, whistle, whistle, beep"
posted by soundofsuburbia at 10:38 AM on September 19 [2 favorites]

Talk like bacon day:


"I'm real bacon."
posted by The Whelk at 10:40 AM on September 19

For those of you still on facebook, you can now change your language to "English (pirate)." It is surprisingly thorough. "Joe likes this" becomes "joe be eyein this with pleasure." "Friends" becomes "me hearties. Basically, everything you can imagine gets changed to something more pirate-y.
posted by Brodiggitty at 10:42 AM on September 19 [3 favorites]

talk like bacon day

...these limitations are three: the first, THAT WE DO NOT SO PLACE OUR FELICITY IN KNOWLEDGE, AS WE FORGET OUR MORTALITY: the second, THAT WE MAKE APPLICATION OF OUR KNOWLEDGE, TO GIVE OURSELVES REPOSE AND CONTENTMENT, AND NOT DISTASTE OR REPINING: the third, THAT WE DO NOT PRESUME BY THE CONTEMPLATION OF NATURE TO ATTAIN TO THE MYSTERIES OF GOD.
posted by everichon at 10:45 AM on September 19 [23 favorites]

I like this "talk like Bacon" day.
posted by everichon at 10:45 AM on September 19

IF WE DID CAPSLOCK IT WOULD JUST BE IRATE DAY, OK?
posted by effluvia at 10:47 AM on September 19 [6 favorites]

How appropriate. You fight like a cow?
posted by askmeaboutLOOM at 10:48 AM on September 19 [4 favorites]

Brodiggitty, that's really amazing. Thanks for telling me.
posted by josher71 at 10:51 AM on September 19

If'n yar in the lovely port of Decaturrrr, GA this fine afternoon, feel free to join the PiratePalooza pub crawl! Cap'n Drew is happy to bring aboard any and all scalawags who's wantin' to join up with his motley crew. And no decks to swab!
posted by elfgirl at 10:52 AM on September 19

Just be grateful it isn't Talk Like A Lolcat Day.
posted by le morte de bea arthur at 10:57 AM on September 19

What do pirates wear when going out on the town?
An Arrrrrmani suit.

How would a pirate travel on land?
In an ArrrrrVeee.

Why do pirates like to read Playboy?
They don't just read it for the arrrrr-ticles - they also enjoy the booty.

One pirate said to his fellow crewmate, "Arrr, that be a fine looking hook and peg leg ye got for yerself."
The pirate replied, "I should think so, it cost me and arm and a leg!"

What do you call a pirate with 8 eyes?
A piiiiiiiirate

How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced?
A buck-an-ear

A pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened, you look terrible!"
"Well," says the pirate, "We was in a battle at sea and a cannon ball hit me leg, so the surgeon fixed me up with this here wooden peg."
"Then," says the bartender, "What about that hook? Last time I saw you, you had both hands."
"Well," says the pirate, "'Twere another battle at sea; as we boarded the enemy ship I was in a sword fight and a scurvy dog cut me hand off, but the surgeon fixed me up with this fine hook."
"Oh," says the bartender, "What about that eye patch? Last time you were in here you had both eyes."
"Well," says the pirate, "One day at sea a flock o' seagulls flew over the ship. I looked up, and one o' them shat in me eye."
"But" replied the bartender, "You couldn't have lost an eye just from some bird shit?"
"Arrr, well," says the pirate, "It was me first day with th' hook...."

All ye hoist another grog...be not fergettin' ta tip yon scullion-wenches.
posted by Greg_Ace at 11:08 AM on September 19 [3 favorites]

I'm starting a counter celebration; it's talk like Bertie Wooster day for me, what ho old bean!
posted by jenkinsEar at 11:14 AM on September 19 [2 favorites]

Say what? Splendid! We'll get all our ends off and then have a decent laze, right ho!
posted by The Whelk at 11:16 AM on September 19

Arr!
posted by Lynsey at 11:20 AM on September 19

Dash it, I gave my man the day off, and will be holed up at the Drones for the remainder.
posted by everichon at 11:26 AM on September 19

Isn't this a double? I could swear I saw this here last year. And the year before. And the year before that...
posted by PeterMcDermott at 11:35 AM on September 19

But come to think of it, what a perfect opportunity for shameless self-promotion!

Here's your music for the day.
posted by Faint of Butt at 11:41 AM on September 19

Poopdeck!
posted by darkstar at 12:06 PM on September 19

I am well and truly pipped. Time for a bally eggs and b.
posted by jenkinsEar at 12:09 PM on September 19

Feh. This year I'm planning to talk like real pirates:

Istaag ama waan ku tooganayaa (Stop or I will shoot)

(Imisa qof baa saaran markabkan?) (How many men are on this ship?)

Maxbuus baad tahay (You are a prisoner)

Ma baddaan ku duugnaa isaga? (May we bury him at sea?)

Gudbiyahaaga baa xanibnaa (Your transmission was blocked)

(Sabab nabadgelyo daraadeed, anigu kama jawaabi karo su’aashaas) (For security reasons, I cannot address this question)

and more!
posted by casarkos at 12:31 PM on September 19 [2 favorites]

Tis ye International Talk Like A Pirate Day.

NEED CRACKED PSHOP. MANY WAREZ 2 TRAED. MEMAIL PLZ K THX.
posted by The Bellman at 12:36 PM on September 19 [1 favorite]

jenkinsEar: "I'm starting a counter celebration; it's talk like Bertie Wooster day for me, what ho old bean!"

Dear god THIS.
posted by JHarris at 12:45 PM on September 19

Arrrgh, ye drain in new seabee building only goes to ye foundation. Arrgh, contractors!
posted by buzzman at 12:48 PM on September 19

Since this year TLaPDay is falling on a Saturday, the rest of the world is experiencing what I have for the last few semi-disabled/work-at-home years… not being able to annoy all the people in your office with “YAARRRR” and “SHIVER ME JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE” and other Pirate-isms.

On the other hand, I think the cashiers at Home Depot are getting quite a load of Pirate Lingo today. And they’ll be selling a lot of wooden planks, you know? I can hardly wait for next year when TLaPDay falls on a Sunday; could be a historic day for blasphemy (not to mention a great day for Tampa Bay's NFL team).
posted by wendell at 12:56 PM on September 19

This was funny amusing OK the first year.....

that is all
posted by HuronBob at 1:04 PM on September 19 [1 favorite]

From the Temporary Autonomous Zone:

"Defoe relates that a pirate named Captain Bellamy made this speech to the captain of a merchant vessel he had taken as aprize. The captain of the merchant vessel had just declined an invitation to join the pirates.

I am sorry they won’t let you have your sloop again, for I scorn to do any one a mischief, when it is not to my advantage; damn thesloop, we must sink her, and she might be of use to you. Though you are a sneaking puppy, and so are all those who will submit to be governed by laws which rich men have made for their own security; for the cowardly whelps have not the courage otherwise to defend what they get by knavery; but damn ye altogether: damn them for a pack of crafty rascals, and you, who serve them, for a parcel of hen-hearted numbskulls.They vilify us, the scoundrels do, when there is only this difference, they rob the poor under the cover of law, forsooth, and we plunder the rich under the protection of our own courage. Had you not better makethen one of us, than sneak after these villains for employment?

When the captain replied that his conscience would not let him break the laws of God and man, the pirate Bellamy continued:

You are a devilish conscience rascal, I am a free prince, and I have as much authority to make war on the whole world, as he who has a hundred sail of ships at sea, and an army of 100,000 men in the field; and this my conscience tells me: but there is no arguing with such snivelling puppies, who allow superiors to kick them about deck at pleasure."
posted by Freen at 1:21 PM on September 19

When I sally forth to seek my prey
I help myself in a royal way.
I sink a few more ships, it’s true,
Than a well-bred monarch ought to do;
But many a king on a first-class throne,
If he wants to call his crown his own,
Must manage somehow to get through
More dirty work than ever I do


I think I may have combined Talk Like a Pirate Day with Talk Like Bertie Wooster Day.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 1:34 PM on September 19

I prefer tomorrow: International Stop Talking Like A Goddamn Pirate Already Day.
posted by doubtfulpalace at 1:41 PM on September 19 [2 favorites]

This'll be as fine a time as any to be lamentin' the lack of popularity of the ar archive format. How many buccaneer sprogs even know of it's existence? Why do they prefer tar and rar? Avast!
posted by finite at 2:39 PM on September 19

Me hearties, several of ye be needing assistance removing ye peg legs from ye arses.
posted by stevis23 at 3:28 PM on September 19

IN THE ABSENCE OF STABLE SOMALI GOVERNMENT WE CAN MAKE THE HORN OF AFRICA UNNAVIGABLE USING AK-47S AND DINGHIES AND TANKS
posted by fantabulous timewaster at 3:49 PM on September 19 [1 favorite]

I watched an documentary re the making of Doctor Who's The Pirate Planet earlier...
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 5:07 PM on September 19

Captain, they're flying the flag of "It breaks the guidelines!"
posted by drjimmy11 at 5:31 PM on September 19 [1 favorite]

Yep, been over this for a while. I did lean that it's been not-funny for 14 years now, which is a lot longer than I'd have guessed.
posted by grillcover at 7:05 PM on September 19

For those of you still on facebook, you can now change your language to "English (pirate).
This is beyond awesome. It improves fb enormously.
posted by jeoc at 8:06 PM on September 19

Yet no CEOs nor Obama participated.

Party poopers.

Arrrggghh!
posted by stormpooper at 7:57 PM on September 20

What did the pirate say when his wooden leg got stuck in the freezer? - Shiver me timbers!
Thanks for reminding me! Time to play some Puzzle Pirates the persistent world game of Puzzling Piracy!
posted by O.Ruehl at 4:10 AM on September 21