!

September 24, 2009 8:16 PM

[",'...:.?;-)

Dear John, Punctuation Products, bad punctuation photographs, and Punctuation meatloaf.

National Punctuation Day!

posted by crossoverman (53 comments total)

.
posted by knave at 8:20 PM on September 24, 2009 [1 favorite]

.
posted by spitefulcrow at 8:22 PM on September 24, 2009

;
posted by Lutoslawski at 8:24 PM on September 24, 2009

%$@! that $%$!
posted by philip-random at 8:26 PM on September 24, 2009 [1 favorite]

I wish National Punctuation Day wasn't a phenomenon started by illiterate morons. This greets you on the product page: "Punctuation first began to be added to texts because of declining standards of literacy. Readers had become less able to indicate their own punctuation."

Holy fuck that's idiotic. [pointed out to me by Bradshaw of the Future]
posted by Kattullus at 8:27 PM on September 24, 2009

w, t? f:

!
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 8:28 PM on September 24, 2009

comma comma comma comma comma chameleon
You come and go
You come and go
posted by killdevil at 8:30 PM on September 24, 2009 [6 favorites]

where is interrobang when we need him?
posted by wendell at 8:31 PM on September 24, 2009 [1 favorite]

...
posted by crossoverman at 8:32 PM on September 24, 2009

Oh and I was pointed towards Bradshaw of the Future by the wonderful blog Motivated Grammar (which has the subtitle Prescriptivism Must Die! and comes with the languagehat seal of approval). Gabe Doyle of MG has a fine post about National Punctuation Day wherein he says this:

Yes, there are certainly rules about punctuation, but they’re mostly boring and uncontroversial. “Put a comma after an interjection.” Okay, fine. The ones that are controversial, like whether to put periods inside or outside of quotation marks, or the Oxford comma, aren’t interestingly controversial. One person says “I put the period inside the quotes.” Another says, “Oh, I put it outside”. The former is more standard American style, the latter more standard British. What is there to argue? I like to wear shorts, and my friend likes to wear long pants. Who’s wrong?

All the interesting punctuation debates I have are internal, as I debate whether or not a comma is necessary in a given spot, or whether two clauses are sufficiently related to be separated by a mere semi-colon. Punctuating your writing is, I think, intensely personal, and you have to practice it to get your voice down. Whenever I edit a friend’s work, I always find instances where I’d change their punctuation (usually by adding a comma), but then it wouldn’t sound like them anymore. I always found this especially difficult when I’d look at my mom’s writing; she writes more directly than I do, and is much more frugal with her commas than I am, so my inner editor would be distracted noticing all the perfect nesting spots for commas in her sentences. Arguing about how to best punctuate is often like trying to convince someone that liking chocolate milkshakes is bad because strawberry milkshakes are good. The trick lies in realizing that there’s more than one good way to do it.

!!
posted by Kattullus at 8:35 PM on September 24, 2009 [8 favorites]

;

Hey, let us be a little more sensitive to those who've had a colectomy, and not go mocking them like that.
posted by BrotherCaine at 8:35 PM on September 24, 2009 [1 favorite]

‽
posted by BrotherCaine at 8:51 PM on September 24, 2009

<> !*''#
^"`$$-
!*=@$_
%*<> ~#4
&[]../
|{,,SYSTEM HALTED

Waka waka bang splat tick tick hash,
Caret quote back-tick dollar dollar dash,
Bang splat equal at dollar under-score,
Percent splat waka waka tilde number four,
Ampersand bracket bracket dot dot slash,
Vertical-bar curly-bracket comma comma CRASH.

posted by ArgentCorvid at 8:55 PM on September 24, 2009 [18 favorites]

my favorite thing about punctuation is all the names for the symbols. Some of them have cool etymologies too. Like ampersand, and octothorpe, and who could forget epsilon?
posted by iamkimiam at 8:58 PM on September 24, 2009

;

It frightens me that I read this as "tl;dr".
Meanwhile, let's take a moment to celebrate the humble ·.
posted by not the fingers, not the fingers at 9:02 PM on September 24, 2009 [2 favorites]

I was going to say something, but didn't want to look like a *
posted by louche mustachio at 9:21 PM on September 24, 2009

Semi-colon should be a period.
posted by smackfu at 9:23 PM on September 24, 2009

my favorite thing about punctuation is all the names for the symbols. Some of them have cool etymologies too. Like ampersand, and octothorpe, and who could forget epsilon?

Okay, I'll admit my ignorance: what has epsilon to do with punctuation?

oh, and:

:(){ :|:& };:
posted by pompomtom at 9:25 PM on September 24, 2009

When is National Punctuate Like a Pirate Day?
posted by PlusDistance at 9:42 PM on September 24, 2009 [2 favorites]

Semi-colon should be a period.

Your mom should be a period.

XD
posted by davejay at 9:46 PM on September 24, 2009

When is National Punctuate Like a Pirate Day?

Just missed it. Septemb-argh Semi-colonth.
posted by crossoverman at 9:47 PM on September 24, 2009

M'sorry, but I always get annoyed at FPPs with several links where each one is a character long. Too hard to click the damn things!
posted by alona at 10:09 PM on September 24, 2009

Let us praise the – and —. Rise above the ― keep your -s straight!
posted by strixus at 10:14 PM on September 24, 2009

Whenever my guild used TTS with our voice server for those who didn't have microphones, we always used to laugh at the way Microsoft Sam would pronounce "circumflex accent" when someone did smilies or wrote in French.

^
posted by cmgonzalez at 10:17 PM on September 24, 2009

Also, must show some appreciation for the ~.
posted by cmgonzalez at 10:20 PM on September 24, 2009

I love you period.
Do you love me question mark?
Please, please, exclamation mark!

posted by blue_beetle at 10:48 PM on September 24, 2009

I <3>grocer's apostrophe's.
posted by infinitewindow at 10:56 PM on September 24, 2009

Sorry, that should have gone here.
posted by infinitewindow at 10:56 PM on September 24, 2009

None mentioned @ the asperand or amphora? Can't have an email address without it
posted by Cranberry at 11:18 PM on September 24, 2009

Oh awesome. I spent National Punctuation Day so busy copy-editing and proofreading that I didn't even know it was National Punctuation Day. Probably a fitting tribute.
posted by limeonaire at 11:30 PM on September 24, 2009

Christ, what a colon.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 11:38 PM on September 24, 2009 [3 favorites]

X, ? ə :
posted by iamkimiam at 12:03 AM on September 25, 2009

One of the slang terms for @ is "monkeytail", which somehow lodged itself into my brain in the form of a song about how the monkeytail and the octothorpe should be friends (a la Oklahoma!.)
posted by hattifattener at 12:57 AM on September 25, 2009

The regular expression doesn't parse.
posted by eclectist at 2:40 AM on September 25, 2009 [1 favorite]

i would just like to point out:

Use a comma to introduce a quotation after a standard dialogue tag, a brief introductory phrase, or a dependent clause, for example, “He asked,” “She stated,” “According to Bronson,” or “As Shakespeare wrote.” Use a colon to introduce a quotation after an independent clause.
As D. H. Nachas explains, “The gestures used for greeting others differ greatly from one culture to another.”
...
Put commas and periods within closing quotation marks, except when a parenthetical reference follows the quotation.

(emphasis added)
that is all. thank you.
posted by msconduct at 4:16 AM on September 25, 2009

No love for Penny Arcade's Mr. Period?
posted by Dysk at 4:33 AM on September 25, 2009

What"s this, all about. Then!
posted by orme at 4:41 AM on September 25, 2009

Now a period is just a little dot
But it occupies a very special spot
If you should see a period, my friend
You'll know a sentence just came to an end.

Punc-punc-punc-Punctuation!
Punc-punc-punc-Punctuation!
They are the little marks that use their influence
To help a sentence make
More sense!
posted by Spatch at 5:16 AM on September 25, 2009

I wish National Punctuation Day wasn't a phenomenon started by illiterate morons.

You mean you wish it weren't.
posted by DU at 5:44 AM on September 25, 2009 [2 favorites]

And death i think is no )

Holy fuck that's idiotic.

Punctuated correctly, though, innit?
posted by kirkaracha at 6:08 AM on September 25, 2009

When I am Empress of the World, abuse of " and ' will be punishable by imprisonment in reeducation camps with forced labor.
or, as they say
When I am Empress of the World, "abuse" of quotation mark's and "single" quote's will be punishable by imprisonment in "reeducation" camp's with forced labor.
posted by theora55 at 6:22 AM on September 25, 2009

Am I the only one who saw the picture of the Punctuation Meatloaf and thought it was less than appetizing?
posted by Splunge at 6:41 AM on September 25, 2009

"Eight Legged Freaks was a horror not because it featured giant spiders but because the title, sans hyphens, suggested a story of eight freaks with legs."
Grammar jokes of the silver screen.
posted by Kabanos at 6:44 AM on September 25, 2009

I've always loved Victor Borge's Phonetic Punctuation bit.
posted by Kabanos at 6:49 AM on September 25, 2009 [2 favorites]

I must register my horror at the blithe neutrality with which Wikipedia accepts the abomination "exclamation mark" as an acceptable variation of what should always be known as an exclamation point.
posted by kittyprecious at 6:55 AM on September 25, 2009

Almost as good as the Gallery of Misused Quotation Marks (which may need a new curator).
posted by zennie at 7:42 AM on September 25, 2009

kittyprecious, you can have your exclamation "point" and keep your school kids giggling at those things that indicate you the end of a sentence. You know, like full stops, but with a silly name.
posted by Dysk at 7:49 AM on September 25, 2009

Who gives a fuck about an Oxford comma?
posted by mike3k at 8:16 AM on September 25, 2009

, , dow doobie doo dow dow

, , dow doobie doo dow dow

, , dow doobie doo dow dow

breaking up is hard to do
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:38 AM on September 25, 2009

mike3k: "Who gives a fuck about an Oxford comma?"

I do. Fuck you, Vampire Weekend.
posted by infidelpants at 9:05 AM on September 25, 2009

You know, like full stops, but with a silly name.

Mmmm, redundancy.
posted by kittyprecious at 10:25 AM on September 25, 2009

"Put commas and periods within closing quotation marks, except when a parenthetical reference follows the quotation."

Well, sure -- If you want to use your powers of punctuation for evil.
posted by steambadger at 11:06 AM on September 25, 2009 [1 favorite]

Virgule

What I love about this little leaning mark
is how it divides
without divisiveness. The left
or bottom side prying that choice up or out,
the right or top side pressing down upon
its choice: either/or,
his/her. Sometimes called a slash (too harsh), a slant
(a little dizzy, but the Dickinson association
nice: "Tell all the Truth but tell it slant--"), solidus (sounding
too much like a Roman legionnaire
of many campaigns),
or a separatrix (reminding one of a sexual
variant). No, I like virgule. I like the word
and I like the function: "Whichever is appropriate
may be chosen to complete the sense."
There is something democratic
about that, grown-up; a long
and slender walking stick set against the house.
Virgule: it feels good in your mouth.
Virgule: its foot on backwards, trochaic, that's OK, American.
Virgule: you could name your son that,
or your daughter Virgula. I'm sorry now
I didn't think to give my daughter such a name
though I doubt that she and/or
her mother would share that thought.

ThomasLux
posted by a_green_man at 10:57 AM on September 26, 2009