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I died for your sins, but those pumps are unforgivable
December 4, 2009 6:51 AM   Subscribe


 
It's too bad that when his mom gets sick his hygiene goes out the window.

Apparently it's from a movie by the same title, and judging by the music video, an awesome one with Rob Lowe as the Christmas Asshole.
posted by graventy at 7:18 AM on December 4, 2009


I rather like the song, and really love this video.
posted by AdamCSnider at 7:20 AM on December 4, 2009


I can't stand that fucking song. I lost my shit laughing at this. Holy hell.
posted by uncleozzy at 7:37 AM on December 4, 2009 [2 favorites]


I almost fell out of my chair when the trunk of the Chevy Nova opened.
posted by threetoed at 7:44 AM on December 4, 2009


I less-than-three Patton Oswalt. The animation was pitch-perfect for the sketch.
posted by zombieflanders at 7:52 AM on December 4, 2009


"I don't think you really need to, uh, give a kid's mom cancer just so a guy can be in a better--"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!!"

This is hysterical, though the animation didn't really add to it for me--Oswalt is pretty funny watch, very expressive physically.
posted by LooseFilter at 8:10 AM on December 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


"I died for your sins but those pumps are unforgivable."
posted by Burhanistan at 8:28 AM on December 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


Patton Oswalt is great. No, wait.

Patton Oswalt is friggin' awesome. (That's better)

The animation, on the other hand...Well, it was well-made and all, but I don't think it added anything to his bit. But hey, if it gets people listening, so much the better.
posted by The Lurkers Support Me in Email at 9:06 AM on December 4, 2009


FUCKING FUCK I HATE THAT FUCKING FUCK OF A SONG, FUCK
posted by Captain Cardanthian! at 10:17 AM on December 4, 2009


Sorry. I don't like that song. I was just talking about it the other day with my best friend, who (much to my surprise) absolutely loves it. She confessed that it makes her cry every. single. time. I was shocked.

So, of course, I immediately sent this to her.
posted by Captain Cardanthian! at 10:21 AM on December 4, 2009




MetaFilter: That's what Vietnam did to me
posted by Rhomboid at 11:25 AM on December 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


My favorite holiday activity is mentioning this song in front of my mom and brother.
While they normally never have anything bad to say about anything or anyone, the torrents of profanity that result from simply saying, "You know, I still haven't heard that Christmas Shoes song," are glorious. Mom sputters, Brother does an imitation of the guy singing, and it generally ends with both of them deciding to call Delilah and request it with some bullshit story and dedication.
posted by Lemmy Caution at 11:51 AM on December 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


I've never laughed harder than when Patton does his Bruce Springsteen/Bob Seger BIG ANTHEMIC rock star voice.

"Uhhhmmerica! Eatin' my lunch from a single bowl, in my parents' basement, where I'm living" and "Uncle Touchy's naked puzzle basement - you won't wear a shirt, and you'll cry" nearly bring me to tears every time.
posted by porn in the woods at 12:00 PM on December 4, 2009


As much as I respect Mr. Oswalt, I still maintain that the Cat Carol is the most horribly manipulative Christmas song of all time. I can't even read the damn lyrics without getting weepy.
posted by Shepherd at 12:37 PM on December 4, 2009


I still maintain that the Cat Carol is the most horribly manipulative Christmas song of all time. I can't even read the damn lyrics without getting weepy.

You're right, I'm bawling over here.
posted by porn in the woods at 5:28 PM on December 4, 2009


THANK YOU SO MUCH for posting this. It's hilarious! I'm seriously falling out of my chair. :)
posted by dnash at 5:41 PM on December 4, 2009


This is great. I never heard this version before. The only version I've heard is on one of his bootlegs from Maxwell's in Hoboken. The older version was pretty funny, despite the fact that he couldn't remember the lyrics to the song. Perhaps the funniest, poorly delivered joke I've ever heard.

He's improved quite a bit since then.
posted by chemoboy at 5:53 PM on December 4, 2009


"Those pumps are unforgivable." Oh shit, I would listen to Patton talk like Paul Lynde for hours.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 6:59 PM on December 4, 2009


They're dese sweet, crumbly little cookies YOU CAN HAVE DEM ANYTIME!

YOU FUCKING WHORE!
posted by dirigibleman at 8:04 PM on December 4, 2009 [2 favorites]


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