Stupid Pet Tricks
December 23, 2009 5:36 PM   Subscribe

How to hypnotize a chicken (and for advanced hypnotizers only: the shark) (YT, annoying new age music)
posted by Blazecock Pileon (26 comments total) 4 users marked this as a favorite
 
I have actually tried this on my chickens, and I can't get it to work for the life of me. Maybe my chickens are too smart? Hints welcome!
posted by ErikaB at 5:51 PM on December 23, 2009


I'm picturing an empty else block inside the chicken's head with a comment that says "Should never get here."
posted by Garak at 5:53 PM on December 23, 2009 [7 favorites]


She's not hypnotized. She's just trying to lay it on the line and wasn't given enough time.
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 5:59 PM on December 23, 2009


Why did the hypnotized chicken cross the road?
posted by flapjax at midnite at 6:05 PM on December 23, 2009


Because she had an automatic trance mission?
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 6:31 PM on December 23, 2009 [8 favorites]


It depends on the bird. Some chickens will not be hypnotized this way.

You can also put their head under their wing and gently swing them, that will put some of them into a trance as well.

Some will just get up and run away.
posted by Henry C. Mabuse at 6:33 PM on December 23, 2009


How to confuse a cat.
posted by Lemurrhea at 6:43 PM on December 23, 2009




How to hypnotize a chicken

With something called love?
Yeah, something called love.
posted by UbuRoivas at 7:35 PM on December 23, 2009 [2 favorites]


That's a polite way of putting it.
posted by gman at 7:38 PM on December 23, 2009


I'm just a modern guy.
posted by UbuRoivas at 7:49 PM on December 23, 2009 [4 favorites]





Why did the hypnotized chicken cross the road?

Milton H. Erickson: Because the chicken knew that until it was willing to be confused about what it already knew, what it knew would never grow bigger, better, or more useful.

Hans Eysenck: I always felt that a chicken owes the world only one thing, and that is the truth as he sees it.

Sigmund Freud: Sometimes a chicken is just a chicken.

Ivan Pavlov: Appetite, craving for food, is a constant and powerful stimulator of the chicken.

Emile Coue: Every chicken, every day, is getting better and better.
posted by Zinger at 8:41 PM on December 23, 2009 [3 favorites]


I'm worth a million in prizes.
posted by Ron Thanagar at 8:50 PM on December 23, 2009


How to jump on eggs without breaking them

Without having seen it, I am left wondering if there is an unfulfilled need which this instructional video seeks to provide.
posted by krinklyfig at 8:59 PM on December 23, 2009


You can also put their head under their wing and gently swing them, that will put some of them into a trance as well.

When I was 15, I went with a group to Australia and when we stayed at this ranch in the Outback, we learned how to hypnotize chickens this way via this method.

And it works.
posted by champthom at 9:25 PM on December 23, 2009


Yep. The under-the-wing-and-swing method is sure fire. We used to race to put the whole flock in a trance before the first one woke up.
Um, yeah, it was pretty quiet in rural Tennessee. Why do you ask?
posted by memewit at 9:36 PM on December 23, 2009


I hope, once it's under, one could convince it to cluck like a chicken.... that would be so meta.....
posted by CynicalKnight at 9:57 PM on December 23, 2009


Actually, Milton Erickson's handshake trance induction was particularly effective on large, flightless birds.
posted by Auden at 10:00 PM on December 23, 2009


I would, but I need the eggs.
posted by drjimmy11 at 10:01 PM on December 23, 2009 [1 favorite]


Tying a white paper band around a cat's waist hypnotises its back legs. Or so I'm told.
posted by a non e mouse at 1:31 AM on December 24, 2009


>>How to jump on eggs without breaking them

>Without having seen it, I am left wondering if there is an unfulfilled need which this instructional video seeks to provide.

See it. Its worth it.
posted by fcummins at 2:18 AM on December 24, 2009


How to jump on eggs without breaking them

SPOILER ALERT

How to get on TV and then realize you really shouldn't be on TV.
posted by Meatbomb at 5:22 AM on December 24, 2009


Keep on hypnotizing that chicken!
posted by jbickers at 6:41 AM on December 24, 2009


You can also put their head under their wing and gently swing them, that will put some of them into a trance as well.


I just saw a guy do this to a pigeon at the Victoria Coach Station in London a week ago. It was very strange.
posted by srboisvert at 7:37 AM on December 24, 2009


Why did the hypnotized chicken cross the road?

♫♪ 'Cause of a Lust for Life... ♪♫
posted by quin at 9:26 AM on December 24, 2009


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