Good Evening, I am the main Dish of the Day. May I interest you in parts of my body?

January 7, 2010 11:44 PM

"The History of every major Galactic Civilization tends to pass through three distinct and recognizable phases, those of Survival, Inquiry and Sophistication, otherwise known as the How, Why and Where phases."

"For instance, the first phase is characterized by the question how can we eat?

How to Choose a Steak.
How To Cook A Steak.
How to Cook Perfect Steak.
How to do it with chemistry (if you've got a day to kill.)
How to Cook a Grass-fed Steak.
Steak on a Stick.

the second by the question why do we eat?

Human Carnivores.
Human Herbivores.
Human Anachronisms.

and the third by the question Where can we have lunch?"

Hungry?  Ready to dig in?  Not so fast.

Disclosure: I have no stake in any of these sites.

posted by Hardcore Poser (16 comments total)

No steak in any of these sites, you say?
posted by TwelveTwo at 12:10 AM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]

This is good
posted by KokuRyu at 12:11 AM on January 8, 2010

From the first link's "step one":

Look at the label on the package of the steak or steaks

Ah, no.

You go to the butcher, one whom you know and trust, and then you point at a tray in the display that you like the look of, and then you say "I want a couple of those, but they're a bit thin, so could you cut me two an inch thick please." And then he goes out the back to the chiller and gets a big fucking piece of sirloin (or rump or whatever), with little dark red dry bits on the edges and a flaky fat cap because it's been aging, and he places the knife and says "here sir?" and then you say "yes, that's perfect, thank you." And then he cuts them and wraps them for you and you wander off, thinking about dinner.

Packages indeed.
posted by i_am_joe's_spleen at 12:54 AM on January 8, 2010 [13 favorites]

Ah. Love that book.
posted by koeselitz at 12:59 AM on January 8, 2010

Great post!
posted by Jofus at 3:04 AM on January 8, 2010

Packages indeed.

Yeah, it reminds me of those recipes for tomato sauce with the first ingredient "1 can of tomato sauce".
posted by signal at 4:10 AM on January 8, 2010

Yeah, it reminds me of those recipes for tomato sauce with the first ingredient "1 can of tomato sauce".

Tomato paste. You meant tomato paste. Oh crap. You didn't, did you?

/weeps for humanity.
posted by explosion at 4:16 AM on January 8, 2010 [1 favorite]

How to cook the perfect steak.

Cooking just one steak at a time has become a bit too labor-intensive for me now that we have a baby in the house. For the amount of time necessary to prep a steak, I can grill or roast or braise a nice big chunk of beef and have sandwiches for days! Yum.

My favorite cookbook, which explains in great detail how to choose your meats.

Previously on MeFi, Steak à Toulouse-Lautrec.
posted by mkb at 6:26 AM on January 8, 2010

You go to the butcher, one whom you know and trust...

I have a hard time trusting anyone covered in blood, and that includes surgeons and schoolteachers, and mime.
posted by Pastabagel at 6:31 AM on January 8, 2010

How does one mime badly enough to provoke Pastabagel?

Step 1: Don leotards and whiteface.
Step 2: Go out in public.

MUTIST.  See if I entertain at your next orgy.
posted by Hardcore Poser at 6:40 AM on January 8, 2010

MUTIST. See if I entertain at your next orgy.
posted by Hardcore Poser

Eponywoahthere!
posted by haveanicesummer at 8:07 AM on January 8, 2010

All known civilizations in the universe have also invented the dish known on Earth as "Swedish meatballs".
posted by Evilspork at 12:57 PM on January 8, 2010

I've always been too impatient to let my steaks sit for 10 minutes. After reading that link, I will always let them sit.
posted by spitefulcrow at 1:16 PM on January 8, 2010

That was the best new bit of info for me as well; captured there in irrefutable pools of juices.  RevengeSteak is a dish best served (slightly) cooled.  Wonder if it applies to roasts too?
posted by Hardcore Poser at 2:21 PM on January 8, 2010

MeatFilter?
posted by twoleftfeet at 4:24 AM on January 9, 2010

Hey, it smells good in here.
posted by not_on_display at 4:23 PM on January 10, 2010