Si Star Wars avait été Français...
January 9, 2010 4:54 AM Subscribe
this is why multiculturalism will never work
posted by yoHighness at 6:17 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by yoHighness at 6:17 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
Why are we not at war with France?
posted by Cat Pie Hurts at 6:26 AM on January 9, 2010 [3 favorites]
posted by Cat Pie Hurts at 6:26 AM on January 9, 2010 [3 favorites]
What would happen if C3PO and Darth Vader met in a gay bar in 1980 and took an interest in each other? Now we know. The only thing missing is a bottle of Amyl Nitrate.
posted by Daddy-O at 6:26 AM on January 9, 2010
posted by Daddy-O at 6:26 AM on January 9, 2010
Goddamn cheese eating surrender ewoks.
posted by fire&wings at 6:29 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by fire&wings at 6:29 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
I think they mixed up C3PO with Jet Jaguar.
posted by The Bridge on the River Kai Ryssdal at 6:30 AM on January 9, 2010
posted by The Bridge on the River Kai Ryssdal at 6:30 AM on January 9, 2010
Bad: Visible C3PO crotch bulge
Good: No midichlorians
posted by PlusDistance at 6:47 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
Good: No midichlorians
posted by PlusDistance at 6:47 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
What would happen if C3PO and Darth Vader met in a gay bar in 1980
Gay bar? Aren't the C3POs boys and the Darths girls? There are some definite roboplegic wrongcocks under those gold outfits, and the Vaders (Vaderettes? Vadères?) look a little too hippy for chorus boys. Or am I just unable to accurately discern the genders of heavily disguised French people?
posted by eatyourcellphone at 6:49 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
Gay bar? Aren't the C3POs boys and the Darths girls? There are some definite roboplegic wrongcocks under those gold outfits, and the Vaders (Vaderettes? Vadères?) look a little too hippy for chorus boys. Or am I just unable to accurately discern the genders of heavily disguised French people?
posted by eatyourcellphone at 6:49 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
"Or am I just unable to accurately discern the genders of heavily disguised French people?"
That's what makes 'em French.
posted by Henry C. Mabuse at 7:05 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
That's what makes 'em French.
posted by Henry C. Mabuse at 7:05 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
Personally I preferred the Turkish Star Trek. The self mockery transcends the language barrier.
posted by idiopath at 7:06 AM on January 9, 2010
posted by idiopath at 7:06 AM on January 9, 2010
I love French SciFi. It always seems to propose that the future will be horrifying and sexy and also the middle east.
posted by The Whelk at 7:09 AM on January 9, 2010
posted by The Whelk at 7:09 AM on January 9, 2010
Bad: Visible C3PO crotch bulge
Heh. You ain't seen nothin' yet.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 7:14 AM on January 9, 2010
Heh. You ain't seen nothin' yet.
posted by ricochet biscuit at 7:14 AM on January 9, 2010
Wow, this video immediately reminded me of this gem, which made me realize that the French Star Wars is using the same version of the theme as trumpet girl. It seems the trumpet girl though was given the music at the wrong speed as I am pretty sure if I hum her trumpet part the way she plays it with the French one then they actually go together. Could someone verify this? It would make me feel so much better for poor trumpet girl.
posted by DanielDManiel at 7:17 AM on January 9, 2010
posted by DanielDManiel at 7:17 AM on January 9, 2010
I HEAR IN THE FRENCH VERSION HAN SURRENDERED FIRST LOL AMERICA FREEDOM FRIES
posted by Astro Zombie at 7:44 AM on January 9, 2010 [3 favorites]
posted by Astro Zombie at 7:44 AM on January 9, 2010 [3 favorites]
The only thing this has going for it is that it obviously understands the relationship between Vader and 3PO better than Lucas.
posted by effwerd at 8:55 AM on January 9, 2010
posted by effwerd at 8:55 AM on January 9, 2010
Man, that was weird.
In the late 90's, prior to the proliferation of DVDs, I went to visit a friend in Chicago, and we went to blast-off video to look for something to watch. They were notorious for having bootlegs of things like a 5-hour work print of Apocalypse Now and the never released Stones documentary Cocksucker Blues.
We weren't really finding anything that piqued our interest so we asked the guy at the desk if he had any movies that were just too far out there to make heads or tails of. He said "hold on a minute," disappeared into the back, and emerged with a video cassette which had "Turkish Star Wars" written on it in gold shiny magic marker. We pressed him for some information, but he was insistent that we just had to watch.
The version we watched had no subtitles, but I suppose those aren't really needed. It was magical.
posted by orville sash at 9:11 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
In the late 90's, prior to the proliferation of DVDs, I went to visit a friend in Chicago, and we went to blast-off video to look for something to watch. They were notorious for having bootlegs of things like a 5-hour work print of Apocalypse Now and the never released Stones documentary Cocksucker Blues.
We weren't really finding anything that piqued our interest so we asked the guy at the desk if he had any movies that were just too far out there to make heads or tails of. He said "hold on a minute," disappeared into the back, and emerged with a video cassette which had "Turkish Star Wars" written on it in gold shiny magic marker. We pressed him for some information, but he was insistent that we just had to watch.
The version we watched had no subtitles, but I suppose those aren't really needed. It was magical.
posted by orville sash at 9:11 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
The "adaptation" link is actually the 2006 sequel of Turkish Star Wars — Son of Turkish Star Wars, if you will.
posted by gubo at 9:33 AM on January 9, 2010
posted by gubo at 9:33 AM on January 9, 2010
The sequel to the Turkish Star Wars is called Son of The Man Who Saves The World, from 2006. It has the main character and actor from the original, has an real budget, and actually, it's not that bad. I mean it's goofy and pretty basic, but there is a self-aware comedy in there.
posted by chambers at 9:44 AM on January 9, 2010
posted by chambers at 9:44 AM on January 9, 2010
argh. Didn't click all the links, so mine's a double.
posted by chambers at 9:46 AM on January 9, 2010
posted by chambers at 9:46 AM on January 9, 2010
Though I will say that, given the choice, I would rather watch "Son of The Man Who Saves The World" than just about any movie made in the US in the last 10 years.
posted by chambers at 9:52 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by chambers at 9:52 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
The music in the French star wars sounds like some sort of dodgy 70s cop show accompaniment.
A more amusing man than I might construct punnery around this idea.
posted by Erberus at 10:07 AM on January 9, 2010
As C3PO is a robot I'd have thought he'd be a bit more in time with himselves
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 11:15 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 11:15 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
I don't think that's "French Star Wars." I think that's just a French variety show of some sort introducing a clip from the Star Wars Holiday Special. The Darth Vaders are all actually Carrie Fisherses, and the C3POs are all Harvey Korman.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 11:16 AM on January 9, 2010
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 11:16 AM on January 9, 2010
Better than the prequels! Great use of CGI to make it look like there was more than one of each!
posted by mkultra at 11:25 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by mkultra at 11:25 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
Well, if the French Star Wars sounds 70s that would be because it was done in the 1970s. The announcer at the start says that "this year's big event was George Lucas' film 'Star Wars'", and the blonde guy is none other than French mega-star Claude François, who, as you can see from that article, died in March 1978. As the first Star Wars was released in May 1977, that places the clip pretty squarely between then and March 1978.
posted by fraula at 11:31 AM on January 9, 2010
posted by fraula at 11:31 AM on January 9, 2010
"this year's big cinematic event", sorry, translated after only listening once. That announcer/presenter is pretty famous too, he still hosts shows; totally weird to see him so young!
posted by fraula at 11:39 AM on January 9, 2010
posted by fraula at 11:39 AM on January 9, 2010
You got your George Lucas in my Interpretive Dance!
You got your Interpretive Dance in My George Lucas!
Call the Poison Control Center, and tell them to send Hazmat suits! NOW!
This clip also gave me a horrifying vision of the future of androids, and it involves mime, the uncanny valley, and disco. If we ever get past that stage and still want to have robots, then, and only then, will we have to worry about a robot takeover.
posted by chambers at 11:42 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
You got your Interpretive Dance in My George Lucas!
Call the Poison Control Center, and tell them to send Hazmat suits! NOW!
This clip also gave me a horrifying vision of the future of androids, and it involves mime, the uncanny valley, and disco. If we ever get past that stage and still want to have robots, then, and only then, will we have to worry about a robot takeover.
posted by chambers at 11:42 AM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
You know what would have happened if Ella Fitzgerald married Darth Vader?
She'd be Ella Vader.
posted by jenkinsEar at 1:13 PM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
She'd be Ella Vader.
posted by jenkinsEar at 1:13 PM on January 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
The sad, sad fact is this is still more watchable than SW I, II and III combined.
posted by signal at 1:20 PM on January 9, 2010
posted by signal at 1:20 PM on January 9, 2010
If that was shot in the 1970s, what is Lady Gaga doing in the background?
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 1:42 PM on January 9, 2010
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 1:42 PM on January 9, 2010
"These are not the dance moves you are looking for."
posted by ...possums at 2:22 PM on January 9, 2010
posted by ...possums at 2:22 PM on January 9, 2010
The music from that clip is actually by a "band" called Meco who were responsible for many disco-fied renditions of movie music in the late 70's/early 80's.
The disco version of the Star Wars theme was a hit with frequent airplay in 1977. 4 year-old me loved it.
A few years later I owned the album with Meco's version of the Ewok Celebration, to my eternal shame.
posted by Rarebit Fiend at 10:34 PM on January 9, 2010
The disco version of the Star Wars theme was a hit with frequent airplay in 1977. 4 year-old me loved it.
A few years later I owned the album with Meco's version of the Ewok Celebration, to my eternal shame.
posted by Rarebit Fiend at 10:34 PM on January 9, 2010
I only made it to the bit where the cantina song starts playing. At this time of night the clip seems like genuine grade-A nightmare fuel rather than the entertainment it was probably meant to be.
posted by Monster_Zero at 11:49 PM on January 9, 2010
posted by Monster_Zero at 11:49 PM on January 9, 2010
i was tyring to say "rire sonore dehors" if anyone cared
posted by thylacine at 12:04 AM on January 10, 2010
posted by thylacine at 12:04 AM on January 10, 2010
Holy crap they used disco star wars for something!
Aw shit the person who commented before me already explained what it is. Oh well I KNEW THE MUSIC TOO I AM JUST AS INTERESTING AS HIM
posted by tehloki at 12:23 AM on January 10, 2010
Aw shit the person who commented before me already explained what it is. Oh well I KNEW THE MUSIC TOO I AM JUST AS INTERESTING AS HIM
posted by tehloki at 12:23 AM on January 10, 2010
Wow have I really had this tab open for 2 hours without reading it
posted by tehloki at 12:24 AM on January 10, 2010
posted by tehloki at 12:24 AM on January 10, 2010
MetaFilter: have I really had this tab open for 2 hours without reading it?
posted by mazola at 8:01 AM on January 10, 2010
posted by mazola at 8:01 AM on January 10, 2010
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posted by Smart Dalek at 5:24 AM on January 9, 2010