Pvt. Droop Has Missed The War!

March 9, 2010 8:34 PM

Droops and 8-balls in this man's army shouldn't take unnecessary chances with their lives. Illustrated by Walt Ditzen.

Advice and observations include:
A man is mighty tempted to go along in an overcrowded car.
It is dangerous to stand in the probable path of automobiles.
Common mistakes that result in drownings are: Swimming within 2 hours of eating a heavy meal, plunging into cold water when overheated.
Soldiers have been decapitated by sticking their heads out of railroad car windows, and have lost arms that way, too.

posted by tellurian (6 comments total)

When he gets out, he won't be Pvt. Droop any more.

He'll be Dr. Droop—the army can't use a man with a permanently wrecked leg.

Somehow I got the impression that there was more involved with getting a PhD than this.
posted by lekvar at 8:52 PM on March 9, 2010

First thing that came to mind was "Too bad they didn't get this guy to draw the illustrations Kill or Get Killed" back then.

That would have been interesting.
posted by Pirate-Bartender-Zombie-Monkey at 9:03 PM on March 9, 2010

Sorry Sarge. I was hanging out with Goofus and Gallant on the 3 day pass. We got kind of drunk. I liked Goofus but Gallant was hot. And you know how things go. I got in the back seat with Gallant and got him drunk. We were going at it when Tinkerbell flew in front of the damn car.

We ended up off road and hit some crocodile that made a ticking noise. Killed it dead.

So instead of having a good time with ma buddies I made you a belt from the croc. Killed the two friendlies and I give you this Tinkerbell in a jar.

We okay?

Oh, okay sarge. But just this once.
posted by Splunge at 9:17 PM on March 9, 2010

DO YOU GO TO FIRETRAP ROADHOUSES AND CABARETS?

SIR YES SIR!
posted by Splunge at 9:24 PM on March 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

The actual page says "Mr. Droop" not "Dr. Droop"
posted by delmoi at 10:05 PM on March 9, 2010

So is he called Droop because of his partiality to the 8-ball? Perhaps if he just stuck to buying grams, his use wouldn't be so disabling?
posted by PeterMcDermott at 12:29 AM on March 10, 2010