July 17, 2001

11:36 AM

Why take vitamins, when you can wear them? A Japanese company says people will soon be able to get their daily dose of Vitamin C simply by wearing a T-shirt. A T-shirt made out of fibre - called V-up - would have the equivalent vitamin content of two lemons and remain effective after 30 washes.
posted by 120degrees (21 comments total)

Why take vitamins (or wear bizarre vitamin-loaded shirts, for that matter), when you can get your daily dose of vitamin C by drinking a glass of orange juice?
posted by chuq at 11:53 AM on July 17, 2001

The only thing better than this would be gravy that you can see through. Crystal Gravy. Yeah, you could see your meat.
posted by jeb at 11:54 AM on July 17, 2001

Ooh! Ooh! Viagra you can take by wearing leopard-skin briefs!
posted by MonkeyMeat at 11:56 AM on July 17, 2001

Be on the lookout for Dick Cheney's new line of designer Defibrillating Neckties.
posted by Skot at 12:00 PM on July 17, 2001

Well, there's a hell of a lot of sugar in orange juice, for one thing...
posted by kindall at 12:00 PM on July 17, 2001

The possibilities are endless:

Rogaine hats

Dexatrim belts

Ritalin straightjackets

Visine eyeglasses

etc.....
posted by conquistador at 12:15 PM on July 17, 2001

I dunno. Was anyone else immediately reminded of Hercules' last shirt?
posted by whatnotever at 12:24 PM on July 17, 2001

Well, there's a hell of a lot of sugar in orange juice, for one thing...

there's a hell of a lot of sugar in a t-shirt too!

er, maybe not.
posted by chrisege at 12:25 PM on July 17, 2001

Other possibilities include:

Ecstasy Tank Tops - keeps you raving all night long.

Acid Underwear - a hallucinogenic party in your pants.

Crack Hats - Lose 30 pounds in 30 hours.
posted by Starchile at 12:45 PM on July 17, 2001

Prozac bedsheets? Wake up on the right side of the bed every morning.
posted by jpoulos at 12:51 PM on July 17, 2001

I am on the edge of my seat waiting for
The Paxil Serape...
The Gingko Biloba "I'm with Stupid" T-Shirt
but perhaps the most useful: Tinactin Socks
posted by Kafkaesque at 12:56 PM on July 17, 2001

Kafkaesque, I'd be looking into patenting the idea of the Tinactin socks. That could be a winner. You could wipe out athlete's foot in your lifetime.
posted by SteveS at 1:06 PM on July 17, 2001

Or is it "Ginkgo".

damn!

I thought that crap was supposed to make me less dumber.
posted by Kafkaesque at 1:13 PM on July 17, 2001

Ya know -- if they combine this with the sweat-eating, bacteria-infused cloth they are developing at the University of Massachusetts, the nutritional value wouldn't wash out so quickly. Ah, brave new world!
posted by RavinDave at 2:06 PM on July 17, 2001

Well, there's a hell of a lot of sugar in orange juice, for one thing...

Then eat lemons. Or rose hips. Or hot chiles, for that matter, which are high in vitamin C. Red chili peppers, sweet peppers, kale, parsley, collard, and turnip greens are excellent sources, as are broccoli, brussels sprouts, watercress, cauliflower, cabbage, and strawberries.

The point is that you should be getting your vitamins from the foods you eat, not from some kind of wacky vitamin-soaked clothing. Ugh.

The Viagra briefs sound promising, though.
posted by chuq at 2:10 PM on July 17, 2001

"Here, suck this," said Roosta, offering Zaphod his towel.
Zaphod stared at him as if he expected a cuckoo to leap out of his forehead on a small spring.
"It's soaked in nutrients," explained Roosta.
"What are you, a messy eater or something?" said Zaphod.
"The yellow stripes are high in protein, the green ones have vitamin B and C complexes, the little pink flowers contain wheatgerm extracts."
Zaphod took and looked at it in amazement.
"What are the brown stains?" he asked.
"Bar-B-Q sauce," said Roosta, "for when I get sick of wheatgerm."
Zaphod sniffed it doubtfully.
Even more doubtfully, he sucked a corner. He spat it out again.
"Ugh," he stated.
"Yes," said Roosta, "when I've had to suck that end I usually need to suck the other end a bit too."
"Why," asked Zaphod suspiciously, "what's in that?"
"Anti-depressants," said Roosta.
"I've gone right off this towel, you know," said Zaphod handing it back.

-The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, Chapter 8
posted by fidelity at 2:53 PM on July 17, 2001

fidelity...
Douglas Adams was brilliant, wasn't he? Foresaw much of what we now take for granted. I was at Zaphod Beeblebrox in Ottawa the day he died. Eerie, n'est-ce pas?
posted by drgonzo at 5:57 PM on July 17, 2001

The point is that you should be getting your vitamins from the foods you eat, not from some kind of wacky vitamin-soaked clothing.

Actually... if I could get all my nourishment transdermally, it would save an awful lot of time and energy. Imagine, never having to eat unless you want to.
posted by kindall at 6:07 PM on July 17, 2001

Just think... with vitamins and nutrients coming from other sources, food could be all about the taste and the experience. We could finally achieve the dreams the past had for their future: Plastic candy.

Soylent green wouldn't be people; it would be fabric.
posted by fidelity at 6:37 PM on July 17, 2001

I have scurvy, but my nipples are bursting with vitality!
posted by dong_resin at 2:32 AM on July 18, 2001

dong, I so didn't need to know that about you.
posted by lia at 4:38 AM on July 18, 2001