984 days, 04 hours, 7 minutes, 14 seconds remaining

April 11, 2010 5:52 PM

You and your loved ones are invited to survive the next earth devastating catastrophe, terrorist or nuclear attack at the Vivos underground shelter network. The 132 spaces in Barstow CA are going like hotcakes, but there are 19 other facilities planned. Check out the facilities and even the menu.

For short-term crises, you could just get a Quantum Sleeper. And for the long haul, you could always go the do-it-yourself route but, damn, that sounds like a lot of work. Vivos sounds like survival for the smart, busy set who don't have the time to prepare:

Vivos is not about “survivalist”, but rather surviving. (PDF)
To be a Vivos “survivor” you do not need to be a “survivalist” ... Vivos members do not need to spend years studying and preparing. They only need to show up at a Vivos facility where everything needed is ready and waiting – complete and abundant enough for up to one year of autonomous, underground survival from virtually any threat nature or mankind can create.

posted by madamjujujive (72 comments total)

I've been to Barstow. I think I'd rather die in the next earth devastating catastrophe.
posted by el_lupino at 5:54 PM on April 11, 2010 [17 favorites]

I hope they bring a spare water chip.
posted by Rhaomi at 5:55 PM on April 11, 2010 [16 favorites]

...I see someone already beat me to "hm, sudden death in an annihilating nuclear flash over Santa Monica, or post-apocalyptic subsistence living in Barstow?"
posted by fairytale of los angeles at 5:57 PM on April 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

I seriously expected to see a Vault-Tec Industries logo on that site. It's for real? Eep.
posted by ArkhanJG at 5:59 PM on April 11, 2010 [5 favorites]

Where are the giraffes?
posted by Brian B. at 6:00 PM on April 11, 2010

"I've been to Barstow. I think I'd rather die in the next earth devastating catastrophe."

I was going to say the same thing. I spent a week there one afternoon.
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 6:01 PM on April 11, 2010 [22 favorites]

post-apocalyptic subsistence living in Barstow

Wouldn't that actually be a step up from present-day living in Barstow?
posted by FelliniBlank at 6:05 PM on April 11, 2010 [2 favorites]

* Dusts off Tunnel Snakes jacket*
posted by chaff at 6:11 PM on April 11, 2010 [4 favorites]

Members need to only arrive before the facility is sealed and secured.

Of course. Naturally, in the event of some global catastrophe, cars will be running, roads will be clear, petrol will be available, and you'll be at your leisure to travel significant distances to your shelter. Of course.
posted by twirlypen at 6:13 PM on April 11, 2010 [4 favorites]

We were somewhere under Barstow, on the edge of the blast zone, when the food pills began to take hold.
posted by adipocere at 6:14 PM on April 11, 2010 [17 favorites]

Vivos members [. . .] only need to show up at a Vivos facility where everything needed is ready and waiting – complete and abundant enough for up to one year of autonomous, underground survival from virtually any threat nature or mankind can create.

Yeah, that approach worked out just great in Swan Song.
posted by FelliniBlank at 6:15 PM on April 11, 2010

I truly wonder whether they will get enough customers to make for a sustainable commercial venture. Are there enough cynical pessimists, militant survivalists and religious extremists, worried about the "end times"?

Despite the amount of attention various predictions of human extinction seem to get, very few people except for a few fringe groups actually seem to believe them ... pardon the pun... as gospel. And of course, none of the people (like Von Neumann), or groups (Branch Davidians) that have ever predicted that humans were going to be wiped out (whether by G-d, some incarnation of evil, natural or man-made forces, etc.,) have ever been proven right.

I realize that the Left Behind series is incredibly popular, and that as it is relatively unique in entertainment depictions of the potential extinction of mankind in that it doesn't give a non-extinction outcome. (Think Armageddon, The Postman, etc.) But I wonder how many evangelical Christians who read it really think it's a prediction of things to come.
posted by zarq at 6:18 PM on April 11, 2010

It's a tickling thought that the kind of people who would want to buy or rent a shelter to protect themselves from 2012 or "anarchy"... are EXACTLY the kind of people I would want to live in there. Everyone wins!
posted by _dario at 6:19 PM on April 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

I suspect, from the look of it, that he's been spending at least some of the money on vast quantities of beer.
posted by Huck500 at 6:19 PM on April 11, 2010 [2 favorites]

I15 between Vegas and LA is already a parking lot practically every day. If the shit hits the fan, it would be pretty useless. You better have your helicopter.
posted by birdherder at 6:21 PM on April 11, 2010

cynical pessimists, militant survivalists and religious extremists, worried about the "end times"

Never mind post-apocalyptic Barstow, imagine living underground with 100 of these people all saying, "I told you so."
posted by tracicle at 6:23 PM on April 11, 2010 [4 favorites]

Yum!

http://www.google.com/search?q=%22A+Boy+and+His+Dog%22
posted by hank at 6:28 PM on April 11, 2010

For those of you who are worried about traffic, I'd say don't wait the full 984 days - plan to move in a month early. Or heck, depending on where the other locations are (since no one seems enthusiastic at Barstow), plan to move when available. You can read about some of your other community members and why they have joined or are planning to join.
posted by madamjujujive at 6:32 PM on April 11, 2010

Who want's to survive the apocalypse if you have to live in Barstow?
posted by doctor_negative at 6:35 PM on April 11, 2010

I've never been as isolated in as complete a way as one might be if one spent a year in a facility like this by choice, but I can tell you from my 'lesser' experiences that few people really have anything like the psychological make-up necessary to live in such a manner for more than a few days without becoming psychotic / manic / depressive / freakishly annoying / etc. (Take your pick.) The idea of living with even a random group of people like this is awful enough to have been the basis of plenty of art and literature about the horrors which would occur.

Being stuck in such a place with a group of people strange enough to have thought it was a good idea in advance is such a monstrously bad idea that I'd choose even a kind of slow death over it. And happily, too.
posted by Dee Xtrovert at 6:37 PM on April 11, 2010 [10 favorites]

War. War never changes.
posted by BeerFilter at 6:37 PM on April 11, 2010 [2 favorites]

Hang on... this could be brilliant. How about this: we set up some fake catastrophe, release a few reports that the comet's about to hit, and then let all these fools run to the hills and bury themselves underground. We can pretend to be going mad while they're at it, which is fun.

Once they've locked themselves in, we can come back out and enjoy a world without these people! We'd need to make a few radio transmissions about the radioactive fallout or starvation or what have you, just to keep them happy underground, and then we're all set. They're happy being survivors, we're happy because we don't have to listen to them.

Also, while they're eating dehydrated freeze dried apple chips, we're eating fresh, real food.
posted by twirlypen at 6:37 PM on April 11, 2010 [6 favorites]

Gee, am I too late to make a Barstow joke?
posted by JaredSeth at 6:38 PM on April 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

I lived in Barstow for a couple of years. It would have been nicer if I could have lived underground
posted by razzuli at 6:39 PM on April 11, 2010 [2 favorites]

You know, I was prepared to say this isn't much worse than any of the many other fear-mongering insurance service... that is until I found the prophecy page.

I thought the title of the post was in jest. I am ever the internet optimist.
posted by Mr. Anthropomorphism at 6:40 PM on April 11, 2010

I wonder if Weyland Yutani is involved in any way...
posted by paddbear at 6:41 PM on April 11, 2010

So...it's like a hotel....but people pay money to not stay in it.

These people could be business geniuses.
posted by Salvor Hardin at 6:42 PM on April 11, 2010 [3 favorites]

Where did this guy get the money to do this? Doesn't look cheap.

Also, the menu lists "wines." But it does not go into further detail. I will need to see a full list, sir, before I decide whether I shall live underground with you.

I just love the idea of someone uncorking a bottle and pouring a glass of Malbec. "My, this is excellent. Terrible shame about the apocalypse."
posted by veggieboy at 6:43 PM on April 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

There's been rumors of war and wars that have been
The meaning of the life has been lost in the wind
And some people thinkin' that the end is close by
"Stead of learnin' to live they are learning to die.
Let me die in my footsteps
Before I go down under the ground.

I don't know if I'm smart but I think I can see
When someone is pullin' the wool over me
And if this war comes and death's all around
Let me die on this land 'fore I die underground.
Let me die in my footsteps
Before I go down under the ground.

There's always been people that have to cause fear
They've been talking of the war now for many long years
I have read all their statements and I've not said a word
But now Lawd God, let my poor voice be heard.
Let me die in my footsteps
Before I go down under the ground.

If I had rubies and riches and crowns
I'd buy the whole world and change things around
I'd throw all the guns and the tanks in the sea
For they are mistakes of a past history.
Let me die in my footsteps
Before I go down under the ground.

Let me drink from the waters where the mountain streams flood
Let me smell of wildflowers flow free through my blood
Let me sleep in your meadows with the green grassy leaves
Let me walk down the highway with my brother in peace.
Let me die in my footsteps
Before I go down under the ground.

Go out in your country where the land meets the sun
See the craters and the canyons where the waterfalls run
Nevada, New Mexico, Arizona, Idaho
Let every state in this union seep in your souls.
And you'll die in your footsteps
Before you go down under the ground.

"Let Me Die in My Foot Steps" Bob Dylan 1962.

Some things never change I guess....
posted by hector horace at 6:47 PM on April 11, 2010 [3 favorites]

I wonder if Weyland Yutani is involved in any way...

Beware the "hosting fee" in the fine print of your residency agreement....
posted by zarq at 6:49 PM on April 11, 2010

The parents of these people built backyard fallout shelters in 1961 anticipating of the Armageddon that was going to come as a result of nuclear war between the US and Russia. Slightly more than ten years ago these same people were selling end times survival foods, generators and other gear because society was going to collapse at Y2K due to a computer glitch. In another ten years they’ll be running the same scam on another group of the fearful.
posted by X4ster at 6:51 PM on April 11, 2010

The parents of these people built backyard fallout shelters in 1961 anticipating of the Armageddon that was going to come as a result of nuclear war between the US and Russia.

To be totally fair, I would've probably thought pretty hard about building a backyard fallout shelter during the Cuban Missile Crisis. That was some scary shit.
posted by signalnine at 6:58 PM on April 11, 2010

Well, here are some other interesting things. The man speaking here (1:16) seems to be the same man here. He's selling fractional ownership of villas, and I came across something stating that that was where he got the money for that. This is confirmed from his Facebook profile, which also confirms that he is the man responsible for inventing several inflatable advertising devices in this article.

A Google patent search verifies that he actually holds the patent for A three-dimensional figure made from an inflatable, sculptured envelope of soft pliable material into which is blown a constant flow of ambient air wherein said flow of ambient air can be modulated or reversed to cause a lifelike movement of the sculptured figure. He holds other patents for other things, mostly toys and other inflatable advertising related things.

Given the tone of the possible reasons you might need this shelter, and the man's background in advertising, I'm not sure I would give him $40,000 just yet.
posted by Comrade_robot at 7:03 PM on April 11, 2010 [5 favorites]

So, like, seriously? This isn't a viral marketing campaign for a new Fallout-like video game that happens to take place in 2012?

I'm not convinced.

That said, if the "photos" are indeed scenes from the game, it has pretty crappy graphics.
posted by treepour at 7:05 PM on April 11, 2010

Must be nice to be so rich and powerful as to have nothing better to do with your riches and power. Oh. And paranoid.
posted by notreally at 7:09 PM on April 11, 2010

You mean he invented wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube man?
posted by sourwookie at 7:12 PM on April 11, 2010 [3 favorites]

Strangelove:
[...] a computer could be set and programmed to accept factors from youth, health, sexual fertility, intelligence, and a cross section of necessary skills. Of course it would be absolutely vital that our top government and military men be included to foster and impart the required principles of leadership and tradition. Slams down left fist. Right arm rises in stiff Nazi salute. Arrrrr! Restrains right arm with left. Naturally, they would breed prodigiously, eh? There would be much time, and little to do. But, ah, with the proper breeding techniques and a ratio of say, ten females to each male, I would guess that they could then work their way back to the present gross national product within say, twenty years.

Muffley:
But look here doctor, wouldn't this nucleus of survivors be so grief stricken and anguished that they'd, well, envy the dead and not want to go on living?

Strangelove:
No sir... Right arm rolls his wheelchair backwards. Excuse me. Struggles with wayward right arm, ultimately subduing it with a beating from his left.
Also when... when they go down into the mine everyone would still be alive. There would be no shocking memories, and the prevailing emotion will be one of nostalgia for those left behind, combined with a spirit of bold curiosity for the adventure ahead! Ahhhh! Right arm reflexes into Nazi salute. He pulls it back into his lap and beats it again. Gloved hand attempts to strangle him.

Turgidson:
Doctor, you mentioned the ration of ten women to each man. Now, wouldn't that necessitate the abandonment of the so called monogamous sexual relationship, I mean, as far as men were concerned?

Strangelove:
Regrettably, yes. But it is, you know, a sacrifice required for the future of the human race. I hasten to add that since each man will be required to do prodigious... service along these lines, the women will have to be selected for their sexual characteristics which will have to be of a highly stimulating nature.

DeSadeski:
I must confess, you have an astonishingly good idea there, Doctor.

Strangelove:
Thank you, sir.
posted by _dario at 7:13 PM on April 11, 2010 [6 favorites]

For those of you who are worried about traffic, I'd say don't wait the full 984 days - plan to move in a month early.

Hell, they could move in right away for all I care.
posted by nola at 7:17 PM on April 11, 2010

When I heard that there wouldn't be any survivalists, I said "Where do I sign up?" Survivalists are all tough and sinewy whereas the class of people they are trying to recruit are all soft, fat and juicy. For when we run out of food of course.
posted by digsrus at 7:18 PM on April 11, 2010

few people really have anything like the psychological make-up necessary to live in such a manner for more than a few days without becoming psychotic / manic / depressive / freakishly annoying / etc.

You obviously didn't look at the pictures closely enough...there's a detention room
posted by billyfleetwood at 7:23 PM on April 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

Survivors act on their own and take the security of their life into their own hands, relying on their own instincts, that have always served them well. These individuals that take control of their own destiny may very well be the proverbial “chosen few”, who have made the personal choice to heed the warnings and prepare for themselves and their families, versus becoming victims.

And when you emerge from the depths (one year later when the food runs out) you can rule the world! Or what's left of it.
posted by nola at 7:23 PM on April 11, 2010

HAI GUYS I HERD BARSTOW IS TEH SUCK LOLOL
posted by kcds at 7:28 PM on April 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

See also Dylan's "Masters of War"


You fallout shelter sellers
Can't get in my door,
Can't get in my door,
Can't get in my door.
You fallout shelter seller
Can't get in my door,
Not now or no other time.
posted by hank at 7:38 PM on April 11, 2010

erk. Get the title right, though:

http://www.lyricstime.com/bob-dylan-playboys-and-playgirls-lyrics.html
posted by hank at 7:39 PM on April 11, 2010

One way to make money is to run it as a hotel. You could stay there for a few nights during international incidents.

Of course to do that you would actually have to build something instead of just collecting investor money while selling a dream.

Oh yeah, along with all of the nice looking computer generated photos there is a video of a place they actually 'built'. But the stuff in this video looks decades old--like some old abandoned factory building.

I guess it is just a -cough, cough, excuse me, cough scam cough cough- an investment in the future.

I can't think of a nicer group of people to have their money 'invested' in such a scheme, um, I mean well thought out plan for any future catastrophes.
posted by eye of newt at 7:40 PM on April 11, 2010

He says he's building it because of potential catastrophes such as "Yellowstone going."
posted by ActingTheGoat at 7:49 PM on April 11, 2010

But the stuff in this video looks decades old--like some old abandoned factory building.

Yeah, it looks like some repainted old factory/abandoned military establishment to me, too. Lots of oddly unimpressive shots of 'random valve number 6' and 'impressive looking pipework' that means nothing at all and shouts BULLSHIT to me.

I was especially amused by the 'Nuclear Blast detector' panel, with its reassuring 2 amp fuse and handy "On", "Off" and "reset" (presumably in case of a faulty blast detection?) buttons.

My bet is there is nothing in that box that wasn't previously in an old radio or perhaps a valve amplifier...
posted by Brockles at 7:53 PM on April 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

Barstow?! This is downwind (fallout-wise) from Edwards AFB, Palmdale (AF Plant #42), Burbank (Lockheed-Martin Aeronautics) and the entire Los Angeles basin. They could have picked a thousand better places to site the shelter.
posted by crapmatic at 7:54 PM on April 11, 2010 [2 favorites]

Build a few "demo" units that you show visitors; don't bother building the rest. Oversell your space big time. Make millions. I'd wager you'll never need to deliver, but even if there's a devastating catastrophe of the sort that'd push people underground, the world will have much bigger problems than trying to hunt you down.

Wish I'd thought of it.
posted by rafter at 8:03 PM on April 11, 2010

Being stuck in such a place with a group of people strange enough to have thought it was a good idea in advance is such a monstrously bad idea that I'd choose even a kind of slow death over it. And happily, too.

Well, we'll just see how happy you are when a tree is growing out of your head, won't we?
posted by planet at 8:14 PM on April 11, 2010 [2 favorites]

Garrrrrry. Gary? Ah, Gary!
posted by Kid Charlemagne at 8:52 PM on April 11, 2010

HAI GUYS I HERD BARSTOW IS TEH SUCK LOLOL

BARSTOW IS TEH FUNAY MILF OMG WTF TWEET LOL

But really, Barstow does suck. It really, really does. It's a fucking dump.
posted by Brocktoon at 8:54 PM on April 11, 2010 [3 favorites]

That Youtube movie showing the interior of the Barstow shelter has a lot of footage in reverse video.

If you are wondering why they did that, and you have a Mac, open up System Preferences and go to the "Seeing" tab in Universal Access. The "White on black" radio button will let you reverse the video on your display, which will un-reverse the video in the movie.

For those who can't be bothered, it turns out that in these parts of the movie, the shelter looks even more like a drab 1950s-era warehouse with peeling paint. The best part is the puddle at the bottom of the entry stairwell.
posted by tss at 9:56 PM on April 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

Barstow is the last place I'd want to refuge from a catastrophe that disables major infrastructure. It relies entirely on modern electricity and fossil fuels for pumping water from wells, and to live there pretty much requires modern air conditioning. It'd be better to head to... What in the hell am I saying?

No, Barstow is a great place for an emergency shelter. If you're worried about the end of the world you should totally move there. It would be a great practice run, you know, a training exercise. Educational, even. It's nothing at all like a scene out of a Mad Max movie in Barstow. There's plenty of food and clean water. The groundwater has never been contaminated with chemicals openly dumped on the ground from meth labs, ever, and there's no pesky rocket fuel testing facilities nearby, either. No sir! Clean, wholesome, lovely Barstow, that's the ticket! The weather is pleasant all year long - plenty of good, clean, wholesome sun! I hear they're going to build a new Disney park right in Barstow. It's just a couple of miles from Anaheim, after all, and right near Las Vegas, too.

However, if Barstow is too urban and crowded for your tastes make sure you check out Kramer Junction, Inyokern or Johnson Valley. China Lake is nice, too. Death Valley? Why, sure! It's a great place for a lovely garden! Bring the kids! No, no, they just call it Death Valley because they have a sense of humor! It used to be called Happy Valley but you know how some people are, they don't like having neighbors closer than a few miles, so they renamed it to keep out the yuppies. It's the Southwest's best kept secret! Why, if everyone knew how hospitable and nice it was they'd all move there. I mean, ice cold beer does grow on trees there, after all!

So, that's settled then. Need any help packing? I bet we could get you on your way to paradise tonight! Heck, you don't even need to pack. They've got plenty of Wal-Marts, and they're so cheap they practically pay you to buy whatever you'll need! Trust me, it'll be fine.

Me? Oh, I need to help a few more folks finish packing, then I'll be right behind you. Beer trees! Oh boy! Isn't that something? I can't wait! I'll see you real soon, now! Drive safe!
posted by loquacious at 10:10 PM on April 11, 2010 [3 favorites]

I found the information on a pole shift illuminating. I can imagine that if there were 10-point earthquakes happening continuously, I would be very safe and cozy underground in my tomb shelter.
posted by so_gracefully at 10:13 PM on April 11, 2010

I've only known one millionaire personally, but he struck me as overly concerned with his health and safety, almost to the point of being paranoid. I probably shouldn't extrapolate, but I cooked up this half-baked pop-psychology notion that for people who are so normally free from want and danger, their own mortality is incredibly disturbing. There comes a point where when you have enough money, the only thing you can really lose is your life or well-being.

Assume for a second the shelter isn't hokum - that it's designed as well as they claim. Let's say it costs $5m to buy a room, and you just pulled in $100m - wouldn't it be rational for you to buy the slot? The chances are you'll never use it, but how else should you spend the money?
posted by heathkit at 11:11 PM on April 11, 2010 [1 favorite]

Also, this article makes me want to get a whole bunch of people to camp out in the desert and do Fallout LARP for a long weekend.
posted by heathkit at 11:14 PM on April 11, 2010 [3 favorites]

Let's say it costs $5m to buy a room, and you just pulled in $100m - wouldn't it be rational for you to buy the slot? The chances are you'll never use it, but how else should you spend the money?

Build your own vault somewhere nice?
posted by infinitefloatingbrains at 11:15 PM on April 11, 2010 [3 favorites]

_dario read my mind.
posted by inconsequentialist at 11:22 PM on April 11, 2010

It could be worse ... it could be Twin Falls, Idaho.
posted by Twang at 11:27 PM on April 11, 2010

...Are there enough cynical pessimists, militant survivalists and religious extremists, worried about the "end times"... zarq at 6:18 PM on April 11 [+] [!]


And if there were, would you want to spend a year or more with them in a hole in the ground?
posted by spacely_sprocket at 11:35 PM on April 11, 2010

According to Vicino, the idea is popular. He said that he received over 1,000 applications thus far and 20 just last week. He said everyone is welcome, not just doctors and lawyers.

“We say you can check your ego at the door,” said Vicino. “We want everyone.”

Although a firm price has not yet been set, Vicino said that spaces in the bunker will most likely be around the $40,000 range.

Also from that article:

A nuclear blast detector seen in one photo bears the logo of Western Electric, the manufacturing arm of phone giant AT&T that went defunct in 1995.

I don't know -- $40,000 per space for 132 spaces is around 5,280,000 dollars. I have no idea how much it would cost to make an earthquake proof (60 miles from the San Andreas fault, don'tchaknow)/bomb proof/flood proof shelter which will hold 132 people for a year, but I'm guessing it would be expensive. This site says 6 million for an underground 2 story parking garage. This Popular Mechanics article states:

A recent bunker installation in the Adirondacks, built to house 100 occupants, cost its owner $90 million.

Now $40,000 is a nice chunk of money, but it's a surprisingly small amount of money for everything that is promised -- supplies for a year, wardrobe, medical facilities, etc. Then again, maybe my 'giving people money for promises' paranoia is way stronger than my 'world is going to end REALLY SOON' paranoia.
posted by Comrade_robot at 6:48 AM on April 12, 2010 [1 favorite]

Of course to do that you would actually have to build something instead of just collecting investor money while selling a dream.

I sense a scam is in play on this venture.
posted by ericb at 7:00 AM on April 12, 2010

Also, this article makes me want to get a whole bunch of people to camp out in the desert and do Fallout LARP for a long weekend.

Shishkebabs for all! THERE you are! Where?
posted by cereselle at 8:36 AM on April 12, 2010

twirlypen: How about this: we set up some fake catastrophe, release a few reports that the comet's about to hit, and then let all these fools run to the hills and bury themselves underground. ... Once they've locked themselves in, we can come back out and enjoy a world without these people!

Until we're all wiped out by a virulent disease contracted from a dirty telephone.

I realize it's probably WAY too late in the thread to make a Hitch Hiker's Guide joke and have anyone actually see it, but I couldn't stop myself.
posted by Greg_Ace at 9:11 AM on April 12, 2010 [2 favorites]

Things you should now worry about: Nuclear, Bio War, Planet X, Solar Flares, Pole Shift, Global Tsunami aka: Megatsunami, Killer Comet, Super Volcano

Sounds like an afternoon watching the Discovery Chanel.

Also, all of the file names start with 'threat:' threatplantx.htm, threatkillercomet.htm, etc. I'm adding Threat: Killer Comet to the list of screenplays that I plan to write after I retire.
posted by Hoenikker at 11:03 AM on April 12, 2010

If only one person sees a H2G2 joke - does Zaphod take Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters intravenously?

Rectally, they're no fun at all.
posted by JB71 at 11:29 AM on April 12, 2010

JB71: Rectally, they're no fun at all.

Having my butt smashed in, either by a slice of lemon wrapped around a gold brick or by anything else, would make me panic.
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:07 PM on April 12, 2010

And if there were, would you want to spend a year or more with them in a hole in the ground?

That would depend on how hot they were. ;)

Seriously, I'm not thrilled about sharing the same planet with 'em as it is.
posted by zarq at 12:26 PM on April 12, 2010

For the price, I think I'll just keep my money. The likelihood of infrastructure mid-armageddon allowing me to get to Barstow--even if I wanted to go there--seems unlikely.

I think I'll just tow my Scamp trailer over to the underground parking structure at the mall.
posted by spacely_sprocket at 5:36 PM on April 12, 2010

Also, this article makes me want to get a whole bunch of people to camp out in the desert and do Fallout LARP for a long weekend.

Or just live vicariously.
posted by Evilspork at 2:39 AM on April 13, 2010

Another option would be to build a hilariously over-the-top shanty town on the entrance, and hire actors ala The Colony and make then believe that they were thrown forward in time, and now have to pacify the wastes. Or, you know, eat them or something.
posted by LD Feral at 7:12 AM on April 13, 2010