Unnecessary backflip! Hiyaaah!

May 5, 2010 4:05 PM

The Youtube channel called Baddest Fight Scenes EVER! has enough b-movie fights to last you till the end of the weekend. And when it comes to this kind of movies, "baddest" is a compliment. I suggest you start with Revenge of the Ninja.

Other highlights:
Iron Monkey: Men fighting on poles. Fire underneath.
Killer Priest: Yes, yes. He is an evil man. Mwahahahahaha!
Master of the Flying Guillotine: Try topping this one for ridiculousness.
The Big Boss: Bruce Lee + groovy music.
Born Invincible: Choreography isn't necessarily effective.
And last, Invincible Armor. Even the master of the Invincible Armor shares a weakness with the lowliest of men.

Until a man is twenty-five, he still thinks, every so often, that under the right circumstances he could be the baddest motherfucker in the world. If I moved to a martial-arts monastery in China and studied real hard for ten years.
if my family was wiped out by Colombian drug dealers and I swore myself to revenge. If I got a fatal disease, had one year to live, devoted it to wiping out street crime. If I just dropped out and devoted my life to being bad.

Neal Stephenson - Snow Crash. Quote via quin.

Coda: American Ninja 2

posted by ersatz (30 comments total)

It's missing one.
posted by dsword at 4:18 PM on May 5, 2010 [2 favorites]

He mainly goes for older films. Otherwise, Oldboy would have probably been included too.
posted by ersatz at 4:34 PM on May 5, 2010

I clicked through looking for Duel To The Death and I was not disappointed.

Although they did miss out on that films excellent use of ninjas, NINJAS, NINJAS!
posted by robocop is bleeding at 4:45 PM on May 5, 2010

How did we not notice how cheesy those ninja movies were when we were 8?
posted by madajb at 5:12 PM on May 5, 2010

No Roddy Piper and Keith David in They Live?

Fuckin' posers.
posted by jonmc at 5:14 PM on May 5, 2010 [4 favorites]

That was the perfect way to start my morning. Thank you so much.
posted by Kaatridge at 5:16 PM on May 5, 2010

By "baddest" we mean the BEST! And by BEST we mean WORST!
posted by shoesfullofdust at 5:43 PM on May 5, 2010 [1 favorite]

Brevity is the soul of badass... ten second duel from "The Seven Samurai”.
posted by Huplescat at 5:49 PM on May 5, 2010 [1 favorite]

No. The fight scene from Oldboy has no business in a collection of unrealistic, cheesy B-movie fight scenes. That particular scene is one of the best long takes ever put to film. It was choreographed realistically.

Notice the details. The way the protagonist switches his timing to fake out his opponents? His stance? The way he checks his distance? That's good training. It's pretty realistic in most respects. It's not really B-movie action.

Jonmc is absolutely right, by the way. The absence of the fight scene from They Live indicates a glaring lack of refinement among the maintainers of this particular collection. That scene takes B-movie fights to an entirely new and wonderful place.
posted by Kikkoman at 6:14 PM on May 5, 2010 [1 favorite]

The Killer's Kiss, fight scene amid mannequins. Not a b-movie-type scene but nevertheless awesome.
posted by kenko at 6:45 PM on May 5, 2010

I know it's a little on the newer side but the exclusion of Rabbi Jean-Claude Van Damme is inexcusable.
posted by Donnie VandenBos at 6:54 PM on May 5, 2010

Man, watching these is like watching the Saturday movies on channel 11. All of the sudden I'm ten years old.
posted by khaibit at 6:55 PM on May 5, 2010

No Black Belt Jones? C'mon, he takes out a gang of Mexican assassins and ruins The Man's wheels.
posted by zinc saucier at 7:14 PM on May 5, 2010 [1 favorite]

"Put on the glasses!"
"No!"

A half-hour's worth of the best fight scene ever committed to film ensues.

Who wins? Well, there's who wins according to the script. Then there's who wins according to who lands a starring role as a villain in a recent Disney movie, and who came in second place to the "Honky Tonk Man" in a telephone poll.
posted by Slap*Happy at 7:27 PM on May 5, 2010 [1 favorite]

What about the Best Fight Scene of All Time © ?
posted by SmileyChewtrain at 7:27 PM on May 5, 2010 [1 favorite]

Alright fine! You win this one, ersatz! You're right, I'm not gonna be badass. Someday.

But I swear my revenge...
posted by Hoenikker at 7:48 PM on May 5, 2010 [1 favorite]

I posted this comment in the Cinco de Mayo thread, but the link is so awesome I want to add it here as it fits well with bad fight scenes (and because I can't post it to the front page since I've posted within 24 hours - but it really should be a FPP in its own right).

Machete: They just fucked with the wrong Mexican.
posted by bwg at 8:50 PM on May 5, 2010 [1 favorite]

They live.
posted by Chuffy at 10:23 PM on May 5, 2010 [1 favorite]

What, no Wing Chun tofu fight?
posted by homunculus at 10:26 PM on May 5, 2010

Shoulda clicked on that first comment. They missed one, all right, dsword.
posted by Chuffy at 10:30 PM on May 5, 2010

Weirdest Fight Scenes EVER!
(Yoga vs. Kung Fu)
(seriously)
posted by lekvar at 1:16 AM on May 6, 2010

Machete: They just fucked with the wrong Mexican.

I made this post because I was bummed that I won't be able to watch Machete with a friend when it comes out. Though I was probably already under the influence of the Street Fighter thread...

Kikkoman, that's why Oldboy would have made a fitting counterpoint.
posted by ersatz at 4:22 AM on May 6, 2010

I am saving this link until this weekend, and might perhaps dedicate an evening to it. And drinking.
posted by Theta States at 6:40 AM on May 6, 2010

Might as well post the whole of Master of the Flying Guillotine because it's end-to-end full of awesome fight scenes.

One-Armed Boxer knows the secret to victory is preparing the ground
posted by wobh at 6:56 AM on May 6, 2010 [1 favorite]

These seem to be bad as in good bad. One of my FB friends just posted a link to what is arguably the baddest as in bad bad fight scene ever. Know idea what movie it is.
posted by daHIFI at 7:44 AM on May 6, 2010 [1 favorite]

Weirdest Fight Scenes EVER!
(Yoga vs. Kung Fu)
(seriously)

undeniably awesome and with an unexpected bonus of french dubbing and kung fu glue!
posted by sineater at 8:21 AM on May 6, 2010

I saw the first 10 minutes of Flying Guillotine when I was a young'n. I always meant to track it down, but was a little afraid I'd hallucinated it.
posted by lekvar at 10:10 AM on May 6, 2010

Know idea what movie it is.
Undefeatable, starring Cynthia Rothrock.

(Don't ask...)
posted by alvarete at 11:26 AM on May 6, 2010

I just got Flying Guillotine from Netflix a couple weeks ago--it's amazing! Really can't recommend it enough.
posted by Squid Voltaire at 3:49 PM on May 6, 2010

lekvar, I expect that when you get around to seeing it again, it'll still feel that way.
posted by wobh at 9:10 PM on May 6, 2010