Features your computer ought to have...

July 23, 2001 1:04 PM

Features your computer ought to have... probably most of us have seen at least one of these before, but here is a damned funny collection of non-existent computer features that should exist. I especially like the "Fuck It" button :)
posted by starvingartist (18 comments total)

I want a smite key, as seen in the Far Side cartoon, "God at his home computer".
posted by dong_resin at 1:37 PM on July 23, 2001

posted by waxpancake at 1:44 PM on July 23, 2001

I love the internet.
posted by jragon at 2:07 PM on July 23, 2001

Now Gary Larson's going to get mad. And Paul Ford, too.
posted by jga at 3:01 PM on July 23, 2001

I don't think I want to see things on metafilter that I'm just as likely to recieve as a forwarded email.
posted by corpse at 4:10 PM on July 23, 2001

...or have already recieved... :)
posted by th3ph17 at 4:19 PM on July 23, 2001

or will probably be receiving tomorrow. :D
posted by jcterminal at 4:57 PM on July 23, 2001

Gary's letter is a bit melodramatic, don't you think? Worried about where his children might end up? Ugh. His children have already been whored out in Hallmark shops all over the world.
posted by goto11 at 5:03 PM on July 23, 2001

At least he took the time to communicate about it via a personal note. You'd prefer a love letter from his lawyer?
posted by Dirjy at 5:06 PM on July 23, 2001

I want a "Seen It" button.
posted by hotdoughnutsnow at 5:12 PM on July 23, 2001

My favorite computer add-on:


posted by RevGreg at 5:20 PM on July 23, 2001

Maybe Metafilter should have a "seen it" button, and after it's been hit by 50 people the post disappears.
posted by mecran01 at 5:38 PM on July 23, 2001

Interesting idea. Bring it up in the Features section of MetaTalk.
posted by waxpancake at 6:21 PM on July 23, 2001

wish there was a troll meter somewhere on my desktop...

;)
posted by jcterminal at 6:40 PM on July 23, 2001

Gosh, I'm sorry! I didn't check with corpse, th3ph17, hotdoughnutsnow, and mecran01 before posting. How thoughtless of me! I must remember to get their permission before posting again.
posted by starvingartist at 6:51 AM on July 24, 2001

I found it funny. So there. Some of us like posts that aren't about "Are weblogs dead?" "Dubya is an idiot" "Weblogs about Dubya are dead, or maybe just idiotic"
posted by dagnyscott at 7:27 AM on July 24, 2001

Sorry starvingartist. evidently you don't have a network of friends, neighbors, aunts and uncles who tend to send you these types of emails daily... count yourself lucky, I got the Bill Gates Email Tracking Software email last week - that thing is ancient.
posted by hotdoughnutsnow at 8:26 AM on July 24, 2001

yeah exactly, it has nothing to do with checking with N individuals first, and everything to do with it being the kind of material that shows up uninvited in your inbox from every semi-net-savvy acquaintance.
posted by DiplomaticImmunity at 10:55 AM on July 24, 2001