"Finally, this project is one of several I've been involved in that's gotten a bit of media attention; this attention means that the paper is going to be the subject of more content-free discussion on websites than is usual for peer-reviewed research."
Oh, yeah? Well, uh, your mom is the subject of more content-free discussion on websites than is usual for peer-reviewed research! posted by lore at 4:39 PM on June 9, 2010 [11 favorites]
lukemeister: "Probably doesn't involve enough blowin' up stuff"
Are their any mammals that can't swim, at least for short distances?
Probably not something really, really big, like a whale. posted by DU at 4:41 PM on June 9, 2010 [16 favorites]
The subject of mammal swimming is actually steeped in mystery and conjecture. Here's a Straight Dope article on the subject from a while back. posted by lore at 4:42 PM on June 9, 2010
Most people would probably look down on a post like this, so thanks for sticking your neck out. posted by ColdChef at 4:43 PM on June 9, 2010 [13 favorites]
The Soviets had us Scandinavians fooled for decades with their creative periscope painting. "No," we said, "don't worry. It's just another giraffe committing suicide." posted by Dumsnill at 5:04 PM on June 9, 2010 [8 favorites]
It pains me that "Serengeti Dismount" is not a Googlewhack.
I expect Swimming Giraffe Denialists to be booked on at least 2 Faux News shows tonight... posted by oneswellfoop at 5:06 PM on June 9, 2010
I've ridden a horse across a small lake. The back legs of the horse extend as far down as they can. The rear end does not float anywhere near the surface. When the horse is swimming, essentially one is holding on to the mane and trailing behind. Just saying. posted by Shike at 5:11 PM on June 9, 2010
What I find surprising about this paper is the uncertainty over lung volume. Inflating a giraffe's lungs [Warning - graphic dissection, viewer discretion]. posted by unliteral at 5:14 PM on June 9, 2010
Unfortunately, we don't really know enough to be sure whether these distributional limits actually have anything to do with the ability or inability of giraffes to cross water.
Then why the fuck is there an entire section devoted to it? posted by doublehappy at 5:17 PM on June 9, 2010
Are their any mammals that can't swim, at least for short distances?
Probably not something really, really big, like a whale.
So how do whales cruise around the ocean? Do they fire torpedos? If so, do they surface to re-arm? posted by lukemeister at 5:19 PM on June 9, 2010
Are their any mammals that can't swim, at least for short distances?
>So how do whales cruise around the ocean? Do they fire torpedos? If so, do they surface to re-arm?
(the joke, if I may explain it, is that whales are long creatures and by dint of simple physics can not swim "short" distances because of their said length.) posted by Burhanistan at 5:32 PM on June 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
BATS AREN'T BUGS!!!!
(Also, who wrote "help I'm a bug" on my letter to Grandma?) posted by DU at 5:33 PM on June 9, 2010 [2 favorites]
Burhanistan,
Go ahead, spoil my dreams of whales armed to the teeth baleen! posted by lukemeister at 5:37 PM on June 9, 2010
Heh. I'm sure the Navy is working on that right now. posted by Burhanistan at 5:38 PM on June 9, 2010
I hope these guys have picked out their tuxes for the Ignobel Prizes, because this seems like the sort of quality research they recognize. posted by It's Never Lurgi at 6:19 PM on June 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
What really surprised me when I first learned it was that Deer (specifically whitetails, but probably the others, too) are really good swimmers. I just figured that with their skinny legs ending in narrow hooves, that they wouldn't be able to get enough 'traction' in the water to do anything useful in the water. Being an eyewitness to one swimming (and definitely not fording, it was up to it's ears) across the upper Mississippi cured me of that notion. posted by ArgentCorvid at 7:03 PM on June 9, 2010
I saw a baby giraffe being born once. At the top of a hill. Poor thing... all warm and snug, then squeezed out to a six-foot drop and an ignominious roll down a hill.
all mammaks can swim, at least until they're born. posted by yesster at 8:28 PM on June 9, 2010
"mammuks" ha! is kan tipe on mise mobile posted by yesster at 8:35 PM on June 9, 2010
mammuk, mammak, lets call the whole thing off. f'in chicklet keys posted by yesster at 8:37 PM on June 9, 2010
Given the immediately obvious spin off of this work is the GIRAFFE FIRST PERSON SHOOTER, this endeavor is at least as important as that missing mass thing. posted by Kid Charlemagne at 8:55 PM on June 9, 2010
Go ahead, spoil my dreams of whales armed to the teeth baleen!
No, silly. The expression about whales is that they're armed "to the gills." posted by The Potate at 9:33 PM on June 9, 2010 [1 favorite]
"Swimming With Giraffes" is actually the mostly-unknown sequel to Swimming With Sharks. Not nearly as good. posted by inigo2 at 10:30 PM on June 9, 2010
ArgentCorvid: "What really surprised me when I first learned it was that Deer (specifically whitetails, but probably the others, too) are really good swimmers."
posted by finite at 4:16 PM on June 9, 2010