Comments on: "Screw You Guys, I'm Goin' Home"

"Screw You Guys, I'm Goin' Home"

zarq — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 17:10:33 -0800

How to Permanently Delete Your Account on Popular Websites Also: Delete Your Account.

If the website you want to leave isn't listed, you might have luck with this article: How to Delete Accounts from Any Website, from pcmag.com.

By: egypturnash

egypturnash — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 17:24:24 -0800

Holy shit, it's an article on Smashing that isn't "50 Screengrabs Of Cool Orange Websites". Holy shit², that 'reader' button on Safari 5 makes Smashing almost tolerable.

So why do some sites make it so complicated? The answer is user retention. They don't want you to delete your account. The hope is that if you have the account, you'll use it at least occasionally, if for no other reason than curiosity about things you might have missed when you weren't logged in.

More importantly, your inactive-but-not-deleted account means they can quote a large userbase to potential advertisers. "Reach five million^* users!" is pretty impressive until you read that tiny asterisk and discover that only a few thousand accounts are actually active.

By: jedicus

jedicus — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 17:27:21 -0800

And for completeness, since it's missing from the linked sites: how to delete or disable your MetaFilter account.

By: battleshipkropotkin

battleshipkropotkin — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 17:37:46 -0800

Shit. I tried logging on to facebook today to make sure my account had been deleted and it was all, like, "YOUR ACCOUNT HAS BEEN REACTIVATED." I've re-deactivated it. fuck-book.

By: GuyZero

GuyZero — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 17:48:08 -0800

"Reach five million* users!" is pretty impressive until you read that tiny asterisk and discover that only a few thousand accounts are actually active Advertisers that don't ask for 7-day active stats get what they deserve. That's online marketing 101 stuff.

By: joe lisboa

joe lisboa — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 17:48:30 -0800

Shit. I tried logging on to facebook today to make sure my account had been deleted and it was all, like, "YOUR ACCOUNT HAS BEEN REACTIVATED." I've re-deactivated it. fuck-book. obligatory? guess not.

By: flapjax at midnite

flapjax at midnite — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 17:48:32 -0800

I wanna see those 50 Screengrabs Of Cool Orange Websites.

By: battleshipkropotkin

battleshipkropotkin — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 17:54:56 -0800

Not obligatory, but much appreciated, Joe Beese. It felt like cattle prods to my Tron suit, alright.

By: joe lisboa

joe lisboa — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 18:01:16 -0800

Not obligatory, but much appreciated, Joe Beese. That may be the first and last time I am ever confused for Mr. Beese.

By: cavalier

cavalier — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 18:22:51 -0800

Stings, I bet.

By: joe lisboa

joe lisboa — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 18:24:53 -0800

It is a high compliment compared to what I usually get called. No offense taken.

By: Dandeson Coates, Sec'y

Dandeson Coates, Sec'y — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 18:25:08 -0800

Excellent stuff. I deleted my facebook the other day and I'm a little on edge about stumbling across something that will cancel the cancellation. I really don't trust them any further than I can throw them, and as they're a globally propagated network of electrical impulses, that's not very far.

By: ethnomethodologist

ethnomethodologist — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 18:37:35 -0800

Thanks! Getting rid of my fucking yahoo! account makes me feel like I've just been to confession- cleansed inside and out.

By: clarknova

clarknova — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 19:03:17 -0800

GOODBYE TO ALL MY ONLINE FRIENDS FOREVER.

By: five fresh fish

five fresh fish — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 19:28:41 -0800

MetaFilter: You can check out any time, but you can never leave.

By: cjorgensen

cjorgensen — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 19:41:47 -0800

I wrote facebook a letter and said their privacy settings were too complicated. I suggested there should only be three levels: 1. Stuff Anyone Can Know 2. Stuff I Share with Most People 3. Stuff My Only Best Friends Can Know So you guys have me to thank for the new settings.

By: battleshipkropotkin

battleshipkropotkin — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 19:48:52 -0800

Joe Cool!

By: doublehappy

doublehappy — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 19:54:41 -0800

Be better if there was an option to delete everyone else's account. As long as they've still got theirs, I need mine.

By: oneswellfoop

oneswellfoop — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 20:19:58 -0800

Holy shit, it's an article on Smashing that isn't "50 Screengrabs Of Cool Orange Websites". For those of you not familiar with the ol' Smashing Mag, who may think egypturnash is being silly or inaccurate or just over-exaggerating: 60-70 Screengrabs of Cool Websites in Lithuania 25 Screengrabs of "Meet the Team" Pages 32 Screengrabs of "Bizarre, Time-Killing" Websites 34 Screengrabs of Examples of Good Archives Design (actually more than that since most include screengrabs of both the sites' front page and main archive page) The Smashandgrabsite can get rather longwinded/obsessive/batshitcrazy, but at least they put all their long lists and articles on single pages.

By: adipocere

adipocere — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 22:08:20 -0800

The suggestions for MySpace are completely wrong. I clicked that "Cancel Account" link I don't know how many times, over a few months, and I never received the cancellation mail. I would receive other mails from MySpace. And, lacking a spam filter on that account, that wasn't it, either. I switched the associated email account to another account with a different service. This, too, failed. Something was obviously broken. Emails to the MySpace "help" were not particularly fruitful. Eventually, technical support informed me that I could send them a picture of myself, with my userid number, holding up a sign saying "This is my salute" as some kind of proof, and after that they would accept that it was my account. This made little sense to me, as I had no photos up on MySpace and they would therefore be unable to match the salute photo to another photo. I do not like having my photo taken, so I declined. They finally refused to delete my account and said it would be staying unless I decided to comply. Right! Here is what I did: 1) Went to 4chan and just surfed until I found a whole slew of unwholesome images. Note: This should take no more than five minutes, tops. 2) Placed various text macros (Impact, white outlined with black) upon the images, in some humorous theme regarding technical support and MySpace. Examples included ... — An erect penis trapped in a Coke bottle. "I ACCIDENTALLY MY WHOLE MYSPACE" — Advice puppy. "POST SMUT; CANCEL MYSPACE" — An odd, medically inclined shot of someone's dilated anus (not Mr. Johnson's). "MY CANCELLATION EMAILS SEEM TO HAVE FALLEN INTO A GAPING HOLE" — Bondage scene involving a pentagram in some kind of Wicker Man/Blair Witch thing. "I AM TRAPPED ON MYSPACE" — A young man receiving what is known in the porn industry as a "facial." "I CAN'T SWALLOW YOUR TECH SUPPORT" — A couple having doggystyle sex, only the man appears to have his arms out as if emulating a bat. "ALTHOUGH OTHER EMAILS FROM MYSPACE MAKE IT INTO MY ACCOUNT, CANCELLATION EMAILS FLY AWAY" — Two women, wearing stormtrooper outfits from the waist up, humping. One is throwing the ole sieg heil. "THIS IS MY SALUTE" 3) Upload these eighteen new images to the photos section of my MySpace account. 4) Navigate to "Report abuse" link and point at my account. At this point, I had spent about three months, nagging every so often, increasing in frequency, trying to get my account deleted. No dice. Total time after hitting the abuse link until my account was deleted: 10 minutes. Then I closed my ticket with a mocking email about how I made them close my account, anyway, without the "salute."

By: Twang

Twang — Sat, 12 Jun 2010 02:58:59 -0800

@adipocere You are such a punk!

By: stavrosthewonderchicken

stavrosthewonderchicken — Sat, 12 Jun 2010 04:16:17 -0800

Holy shit, it's an article on Smashing that isn't "50 Screengrabs Of Cool Orange Websites". Hairy donkey balls. Smashing Magazine is an excellent resource for all sorts of shit if you're a person who makes websites, and only some of it involves the color orange. What it isn't is great Metafilter fodder, but: oh well.

By: Obscure Reference

Obscure Reference — Sat, 12 Jun 2010 07:00:44 -0800

Neither site tells you how to delete your AOL account.

By: Avelwood

Avelwood — Sat, 12 Jun 2010 09:11:07 -0800

Adipocere's method works well with Facebook too. FB mods can disable accounts.

By: Lokisbane

Lokisbane — Sun, 13 Jun 2010 05:48:15 -0800

Much appreciated. The last time I checked I'd have to leave my Yahoo account inactive for some unspecified time period before it would be deleted.

By: Phredward

Phredward — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 07:47:47 -0800

It's interesting that although they have very detailed instructions on how to delete your account, they don't discuss how actually deleted the data really gets. Remember kids, once you type it into the internet, it's there forever.