July 26, 2001

2:06 PM

What we do here on Metafilter is unimportant and should be prioritized so more important, corporate network traffic can get through."The problem is that it was devised by a bunch of hippie anarchists who didn't have a strong profit motive. But this is a business, not a government-sponsored network." (LA Times link)
posted by crasspastor (29 comments total)

ahh, they even quoted a Grateful Dead lyricist... Those damn hippies!
posted by Sellersburg/Speed at 2:28 PM on July 26, 2001

Boo-effing-hoo. That's the breaks. You don't like the unruliness of the internet? Go back to your fax machine.

Gawd, what a bunch of whiny turds! One economic slump and these paper-asses are crying that internet slowdowns stole their profits....? If I said some of this ludicrous shit to my bosses, I'd get laughed out of the office - and then they'd start looking for someone with a little less pussification to handle my job. Time to grow up, kiddies - the internet is not why your division is in the red. You are. Suck it up and fix it, or get out of the way of someone who can.
posted by UncleFes at 2:28 PM on July 26, 2001

Moreover, they're saying that the distributed concept of networking should be tossed in favor of centralization.

it was devised by a bunch of hippie anarchists A bit of an overstatement, although the Internet didn't exaclty have fundamental desgin goals of any kind.

I suppose the Internet is not a good way to deliver broadband webcasts. Maybe they should give up...
posted by rschram at 2:29 PM on July 26, 2001

Aww... the fatcats want to come and play, but they need to redesign the sandbox first.

DARPA = hippie anarchists? Somebody tell the Pentagon.
posted by D at 2:31 PM on July 26, 2001

After years of fruitless efforts to make money selling
goods and services over the Web, many entrepreneurs
and other businesspeople are starting to blame the
system's fundamental design for their failures.

oh yeah, and selling products for no profit was a good strategy. Its the fault of the wires that the offer was transmitted on.
posted by brucec at 2:34 PM on July 26, 2001

. "If something goes down, you don't even know who's accountable. The Internet is, like, 'Who ya gonna call?' "


Exactly, that's what you have to deal with. A public non-centralized network. Who is stopping this guy from building his own network for his customers? No one. Megaglobalcorp should shut up and buy a few satellites.

Wow, the concentrated ignorance and greed in that article is a bit too much. Exactly where would the internet be without non-business customers footing the bills for ISPs and ISPs demanding more bandwidth (infrastructure) to handle the load?

Actually, the internet had to meet a few design goals, mainly decentralization and the ability to communicate even when major nodes are down.
posted by skallas at 2:37 PM on July 26, 2001

Its the fault of the wires that the offer was transmitted on.

I know! It wasn't my shitty business plan, or my fundamental ignorance of the fact that businesses have to make profits - the internet scrooed me!
posted by UncleFes at 2:43 PM on July 26, 2001

But UncleFes, selling pet food online was a GREAT IDEA that would've made you a multimillionaire in no time if it weren't for the decentralized nature of the Internet.
posted by zempf at 2:48 PM on July 26, 2001

Yes, the network needs to be more reliable so we can ensure delivery of horrible MIDI tunes like the one on the nasty site of the guy quoted above.
posted by davidfg at 3:19 PM on July 26, 2001

It's July. It's the silly season. It's just that it's harder to appreciate the value of such non-stories when they're not in print. Phil Space, anyone?
posted by holgate at 3:21 PM on July 26, 2001

So, basically, they want to design the internet around their companies, instead of the other way around?

Ah, I remember when I was that dumb :)
posted by Ptrin at 3:24 PM on July 26, 2001

"If something goes down, you don't even know who's accountable. The Internet is, like, 'Who ya gonna call?' "


Ghostbusters is my first guess, if you actually have to ask.

Like, ya know?

Mind you, blaming the failure of your business on someone elses system design simply means that you didn't understand the system and tried to profit off of your own mistake, a principle that nobody in their right mind can respect.

"Oooh, I thought it was light at night, that's why I made solar powered flashlights."
posted by swerdloff at 3:24 PM on July 26, 2001

jesus christ, that's what i needed to say, someone else using the term 'non-story' on metafilter.

ok tough guy, you tell me the difference between a 'story' and a 'non-story'.

thanks.
posted by jcterminal at 3:48 PM on July 26, 2001

From the article: ...they believe, the system could work faster, avoid traffic jams, distinguish between high-priority data and other material that can wait...

Why, in the context of this article, do I seem to get the impression that this actually means "spam and advertising, faster and in greater quantity?"

From the article: The business world's discontent has increased as the Internet economy has unraveled over the last year.

Along with other problems cited previously, we might wish to add that investors poured millions of dollars into companies that were openly stating that they were not going to be making money at any point in the near future - and then they expected both huge, immediate returns and long term stability? WTF?! I agree with UnceFes on the terrible business plans and lack of profits but those things only became a problem because of stock speculation that ignored all the warning signs to attempt to cash in on "that Internet thingy."

I remember the iVillage IPO vividly since I laughed at the concept of putting money into stock for a company that had already spent $70 million dollars and did not forsee any profits coming back for at least three years - and then watched the stock explode to 300% of it's IPO value in a few days! It's a great site for women to get information from but where was the money going and where was any profit going to come from? Nobody cared as long as the stock went up, they only asked when it started to go down.

selling pet food online was a GREAT IDEA

I think one of the biggest problems occured when people started trying to disseminate tangible goods via the internet. I think it works great for items that, for whatever reason, are "niche" items. I love it for weird jewelry, apparal, books, computer equipment and other stuff that would never be stocked in a store in my area. When you start trying to sell me dog food that I can buy at any the seven grocery stores or six pet/animal feed stores within ten miles of my house, several of which I pass daily on my way to work, AND you want me to pay shipping on a 25 pound item, well, now you've lost me.

There is a reason why the annoying moniker "Information Superhighway" got started - the net is a great way to transfer INFORMATION. If you're selling digital services, the net is an absolute boon. If you could transmit dog food digitally, ePets would have been a fantastic idea...
posted by RevGreg at 3:56 PM on July 26, 2001

"The Internet is an important cultural phenomenon, but that doesn't excuse its failure to comply with basic economic laws" said Thomas Nolle, a New Jersey telecommunications consultant

Baaad internet. Baaaad. Sit. Now stay. Staaaaay. GOOD BOY! Here, have a biscuit™
posted by dchase at 7:22 PM on July 26, 2001

With bits on a dumb pipe, I can't do a major Webcast event," said Milo Medin, co-founder and chief technical officer of At Home Corp.'s Excite@Home, the leading provider of broadband Internet access over cable lines.

congratulations, mr medin! you've received a prestigious lescour award nomination for 'least important reason to change the fundamental structure of the internet.'
posted by lescour at 7:36 PM on July 26, 2001

Solution:
Build. Your. Own. Fucking. Network.



(And return the Internet to the good guys.)
posted by Dirjy at 8:38 PM on July 26, 2001

ahh, they even quoted a Grateful Dead lyricist... Those damn hippies!

Uh, I hope you're kidding... John Perry Barlow is far more than a Grateful Dead lyricist, when it comes to the Net.

Ever heard of the Electronic Freedom Foundation (EFF)? If not, you should really learn a bit about them...
posted by fooljay at 8:51 PM on July 26, 2001

Lets look at it this way, say there was someone to call if the Internet was not working the way a company thought it should. how long do you think said person would keep that job?

I am thinking maybe three minutes.
posted by DragonBoy at 11:00 PM on July 26, 2001

Oh yeah, if business built their own centralized network that offered all the benefits that this article says business wants, would anyone use it?

I mean, would you log on from your home to surf the businet?
posted by DragonBoy at 11:05 PM on July 26, 2001

say there was someone to call if the Internet was not working the way a company thought it should.

Clearly, some sort of internet-themed superhero is in order.
posted by D at 12:18 AM on July 27, 2001

Lets look at it this way, say there was someone to call if the Internet was not working the way a company thought it should. how long do you think said person would keep that job?
I am thinking maybe three minutes.

I don't know. My mom calls me everytime the Internet isn't working and I don't see her cutting me loose anytime soon..
posted by fooljay at 12:30 AM on July 27, 2001

ok tough guy, you tell me the difference between a 'story' and a 'non-story'.

How about excessive dependence upon "controversial" quotes from a fair few "authorities" we've never heard of and are not likely to hear of again, and paragraphs of "the Internet is a network of wires and cables" cotton-wool background? (I've had to plough out enough space-filler myself on print pieces to know what space-filler reads like.)
posted by holgate at 3:00 AM on July 27, 2001

attention, fat corporate bastards!
posted by quonsar at 5:22 AM on July 27, 2001

Clearly, some sort of internet-themed superhero is in order.

Aging Pentagon Hippie Anarchist Man? I like it! Somebody, quick - get Barlow a cape!
posted by UncleFes at 7:03 AM on July 27, 2001

The guy who made the "hippie anarchists" quote, Thomas Nolle, is the CEO of CIMI Corp. in New Jersey. I'm tempted to e-mail him and ask, "Dude, did you really say that? Did you really not know that the internet was designed by DARPA and the Dept. of Defense?" (And their website is ass, by the way - christ, it even has background MIDI music.)
posted by RylandDotNet at 8:37 AM on July 27, 2001

I'm tempted to e-mail him

Go for it!
posted by preguicoso at 9:29 AM on July 27, 2001

When you are unable to solve a problem, you can sit and blame everything else for your shortcomings or you can come up with a solution like this. There was a problem, they solved it within the parameters of the Internet while extending its capabilities.

The pissers and moaners will be eaten by the solvers and doers. Luckily for the latter, there seems to be a renewable source of the former.
posted by joaquim at 9:48 AM on July 27, 2001