Domestic Conflict, Explained by Stock Photos

September 8, 2010 8:59 AM

Domestic Conflict, Explained by Stock Photos
posted by Joe Beese (25 comments total)

I so want to caption these.

"Linda just couldn't understand Brad's insistence they plant daylillies in the front yard."
posted by Xoebe at 9:03 AM on September 8, 2010

Uh, can we erase that? I didn't notice they already had captions. ADD FTL.
posted by Xoebe at 9:04 AM on September 8, 2010 [1 favorite]

Related: Catalog living, captioned photos from furnishing store catalogs.
posted by randomination at 9:06 AM on September 8, 2010 [2 favorites]

So I guess we've moved on from captioning interior design spreads?
posted by Sys Rq at 9:06 AM on September 8, 2010

Jim Belushi? Really?
posted by punkfloyd at 9:08 AM on September 8, 2010 [1 favorite]

Happy stock photo couples are all alike; unhappy stock photo couples are unhappy in their own ways.
posted by m0nm0n at 9:11 AM on September 8, 2010 [8 favorites]

randomination and Sys Rq find themselves at odds over the best other-thing-like-this-thing.
posted by taz at 9:13 AM on September 8, 2010 [3 favorites]

And unhappy hipsters. I kinda think this well has gone dry, though that won't stop endless copycats from getting a book deal based on their tumblrs.
posted by Admiral Haddock at 9:14 AM on September 8, 2010

Jim Belushi? Really?

I didn't even notice that guy because I was hypnotized by her weirdly stretched shirt.
posted by DU at 9:16 AM on September 8, 2010

I'd like to know the back story behind some of these stock photos.

Hell, for most of them I'd even like to know what concept or metaphor they might be used to convey.
posted by MuffinMan at 9:18 AM on September 8, 2010

I'd like to know the back story behind some of these stock photos.

"God, this shit is boring. Wanna throw on that fish costume and clown wig? I'll just be over here putting condoms on USB cables."
posted by Sys Rq at 9:21 AM on September 8, 2010 [2 favorites]

The Snark is strong with this one.
posted by chairface at 9:25 AM on September 8, 2010

I'd like to think that the couple in the top photo are desperately trying to resist an attack by Scanners.
posted by Burhanistan at 9:28 AM on September 8, 2010

The caption for photo 2 is waaaay off. It's pretty obvious to me that Caitlin just made an indecent proposal to Sean. He's thinking that he *could* use the money.
posted by NoMich at 9:34 AM on September 8, 2010 [1 favorite]

that won't stop endless copycats from getting a book deal based on their tumblrs.

Endless copycatting is the I Can Haz Cheezburger business model. Why stop at book deals anyway? There is so much more merchandise to peddle! Desk calendars, wall calendars, appointment calendars! Posters and postcards, t-shirts, fridge magnets, stamps, plushies, etc. etc.
posted by mkb at 9:37 AM on September 8, 2010

Admiral Haddock wrote: "that won't stop endless copycats from getting a book deal based on their tumblrs."

It also won't stop endless copycats dropping vowels to come up with a stupid name for a useless web service.
posted by wierdo at 9:38 AM on September 8, 2010

Endless copycatting is the I Can Haz Cheezburger business model. Why stop at book deals anyway? There is so much more merchandise to peddle! Desk calendars, wall calendars, appointment calendars! Posters and postcards, t-shirts, fridge magnets, stamps, plushies, etc. etc.

O HAI CAT
posted by Sys Rq at 9:45 AM on September 8, 2010

A pretty mixed bag, but Shannon & Derrick’s conflict made up for all the unfunny ones.
posted by Cookiebastard at 10:11 AM on September 8, 2010

Endless copycatting is the I Can Haz Cheezburger business model.

The people who bought it, anyway (Pet Holdings), are pretty explicit about their meme exploitation strategy. Perennials like ICHC and Fail Blog keep churning away, but a read an article recently (similar, but older) about how they start new one-meme blogs -- and deep-six them -- almost daily in an endless search for things that stick when you throw them against the wall.
posted by dhartung at 11:10 AM on September 8, 2010

It also won't stop endless copycats dropping vowels to come up with a stupid name for a useless web service.

So of course I had to look to see what useless.tumblr.com was, and it is indeed useless, but it provided this piece of randomness, which should derail this thread nicely:

There is a scientific explanation of why we should not eat meat. When an animal that dies, the virus in the blood stream start to multiply and end up in the blood streams of who ever eats it. Because no one has researched this fact, no one can prove it’s truth.
posted by stonepharisee at 11:15 AM on September 8, 2010

I didn't notice they already had captions. ADD FTL.

Faster Than Light Attention Deficit Disorder is very common. Hardly anyone can keep focused at those speeds.
posted by Babblesort at 1:57 PM on September 8, 2010 [2 favorites]

Metafilter: arguing about what to do with the small girl that wandered in their home.
posted by blue_beetle at 2:54 PM on September 8, 2010 [1 favorite]

I don't know why the couple in #3 is so confused. Metaphorical things become actual things in my life all the time.
posted by clavier at 3:42 PM on September 8, 2010

No one thinks about the photographers. These must have been tough photo shoots.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 4:15 PM on September 8, 2010

Hey, divorce lawyers need stock photos too.
posted by NoMich at 4:08 AM on September 9, 2010