Journalists shed it all for a story

September 8, 2010 6:58 PM

Emily Yoffe (a columnist for Slate) has a job that sends her on all manner of exciting adventures. Usually, they involve clothing, but not this time. For her most recent article, she shed her clothes -- all of them. Apparently, journalists enjoy visiting nudist resorts because Lonely Planet's Tamara Sheward recently did the same thing and has some advice for would-be copycats. (Complete with a gallery of the best nude events and beaches.) But sorry bachelors, apparently most nudist clubs only allow couples and single women. Eureka, in the UK, is an exception. (No links contain sexual content.)
posted by GnomeChompsky (35 comments total)

Apparently, journalists enjoy visiting nudist resorts

Well, sure. There are a million stories in the naked city.
posted by Horace Rumpole at 7:11 PM on September 8, 2010 [13 favorites]

After a decade or so of being the guy who was likely to be the first one naked at the party, I gradually stopped enjoying it as much, until now the only people I like being nude around are my wife and a small number of MeFites.

You know who you are.
posted by mr_crash_davis mark II: Jazz Odyssey at 7:22 PM on September 8, 2010

If the good lord had intended for people to go around naked, they would have been born that way.
posted by Devils Rancher at 7:35 PM on September 8, 2010

LOLnudists.
posted by availablelight at 7:39 PM on September 8, 2010

David Sedaris did this seven years ago and was funnier.
posted by kimdog at 7:48 PM on September 8, 2010 [3 favorites]

I've never understood journalisms obsession with naturists. Naturists are some of the most boring people I've ever met, they see nothing particularly funny or sexy about it - not the ones who take it seriously. Most of them seem to go as families with kids or older couples.

Naked people can be everywhere, at festivals and demonstrations and even hiking on the Moors that one time. No big deal. I didn't understand the fuss about Erykah Badu's video either, my kids have seen naked people before and don't think much of it. People should just get over it.
posted by shinybaum at 7:51 PM on September 8, 2010 [1 favorite]

Slaters gonna slate.
posted by 2bucksplus at 7:54 PM on September 8, 2010 [3 favorites]

most people do look better with their clothes on.
posted by philip-random at 7:59 PM on September 8, 2010

I know, isn't that odd, shinybaum? (A lot of the reason why I decided to make the post.) Though, really, it's probably more a product of American (and perhaps to a lesser extent, non-European Western) culture. I think a great recent example is the Swiss(?) movie Home (2008). In several continental European countries it received the equivalent of a PG rating, in Britain it received a 15+, and in the US... it was barely shown and came with reviews of "incestuous tensions." (The movie basically contained family bathtub nudity and some other not terribly strange for continental Europe, around-the-house family nudity/limited clothing.) The funny thing is, even though I'm fairly accepting of nudity, the nudity aspects of the movie still felt very strange to me (as a non-European).
posted by GnomeChompsky at 8:07 PM on September 8, 2010

As a friend of mine likes to say, nudity is for professionals.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 8:12 PM on September 8, 2010 [1 favorite]

It may be just me, it probably is, but "a naked man wielding a leaf blower" just sounds, well, wrong to me. (I was going to say "rubs me the wrong way" but correctly changed my mind.)
Tomorrow is Thursday, when the leafblowers make the rounds next door. I'm glad they wear clothes, for their protection among other things. I also like to wear pajamas when I sleep.
posted by emhutchinson at 8:15 PM on September 8, 2010

In several continental European countries it received the equivalent of a PG rating, in Britain it received a 15+, and in the US... it was barely shown

British journalists are pretty much prudes too, compared to Europe. Just recently there were a couple of documentary type programmes, one on nudity and one on labia, that really shocked me - not for the content, but that people still give a crap about either.

I run in the wrong circles. Or the right ones.
posted by shinybaum at 8:17 PM on September 8, 2010

SFBG: Nude Beaches 2010
posted by homunculus at 8:25 PM on September 8, 2010

Horace, now, its not fair for you to take the thread on the first post.
posted by sfts2 at 8:31 PM on September 8, 2010 [1 favorite]

I'm trying to figure out if shinybaum's comment was eponysterical and realized how much I love labia.
posted by sfts2 at 8:33 PM on September 8, 2010

In the Seventies, the rock/soul band I was with at the time, in a very ordinary town in a very ordinary Midwestern state gave us a gig. We were as giggly as teens driving to the job, but once we got there, it was an non-sexual as a morning at the mall. Late in September, there was some fully naked people, and some randomly semi-nude people, like a grandmother wearing just a shirt, or a teen girl just wearing her panties. It was a rather cool evening. We kept our clothes on.

There is a network of camps like this, where families will travel the country, or part of it (the USA is a huge place), spending a few days or so in each one. They will play badminton, swim, or play card games. They may wear shoes on the hiking trails. Maybe pants on their horse rides.

Our trumpeter became the first local to join the camp. Not too politic, he brought up the salient point to his four kids on the way to their first event. "Uhhh, by the way, people don't have to wear clothes here." Depending on their ages, they were either unconcerned or shocked by this information.

As an ex-hippie with a long history of skinny dipping and little idea of the whole "philosophy" of naturalism, it strikes me as much ado about...um...nothing. But others will always remain personally flustered and theologically/morally outraged by the whole idea, of course.
posted by kozad at 8:41 PM on September 8, 2010

I'm naked right now. I think I am safe in assuming all of you are as well.
posted by Astro Zombie at 8:59 PM on September 8, 2010 [1 favorite]

From the Encyclopedia of Bad Taste (Nudists):

What makes nudism so puzzling is its incessent striving for normalcy. Put a horde of sweaty naked bodies together and most of us could think of something more exciting to do than have a sing-a-long. But not nudists, who are determined to show the world what an average life they lead. They are, they insist, just as boring as everybody else, except with better tans.

posted by benzenedream at 10:41 PM on September 8, 2010 [1 favorite]

I can get naked on the beach as well as anyone, but living a whole life naked strikes me as perversely unnatural. Humans have always made clothes for themselves. The pocket is one of our earliest and greatest inventions, why would I leave home without it?
posted by creasy boy at 11:00 PM on September 8, 2010

It may be just me, it probably is, but "a naked man wielding a leaf blower" just sounds, well, wrong to me.

You know you can switch most leaf blowers to vacuum mode, right?
posted by weapons-grade pandemonium at 3:52 AM on September 9, 2010

Nudity is for other people.
posted by tommasz at 5:32 AM on September 9, 2010

"Brave" journalist makes a big deal out of doing what they do six times a week at their fitness club; film at eleven for serious naturists only, no one under 18 admitted without parent or guardian.
posted by Halloween Jack at 5:38 AM on September 9, 2010

The pocket is one of our earliest and greatest inventions, why would I leave home without it?

So THAT is why the fanny pack was invented!

I've always found the lack of single males allowed at nudist clubs odd. Like, ok, yes, I understand that if a single woman is there to perv, you can't really tell (as compared to the obvious male reaction)... But come on - single fellas wanna get an all over tan just as much as anybody else!
posted by antifuse at 6:14 AM on September 9, 2010

I really dislike Emily Yoffe, and her prominence at Slate is one of the reasons I stopped visiting that site. Her advice in "Dear Prudence" is frequently horrible. I like the idea of the "Human Guinea Pig" series, but she always ruins them with her attitude. In this article, on page 3 when she starts disparaging the "aging breasts of the female members", it just makes me feel sad. Why does she have to make rude comments about these people who were apparently so nice to her during her day? She repeatedly says how nice they are, then goes out of her way to dump on them for their appearance. She seems to have no compassion and just comes across as a mean, rude, old woman.
posted by I am the Walrus at 6:23 AM on September 9, 2010 [4 favorites]

When is enough stunt "journalism" enough, huh? Go find something useful out or please remain silent.
posted by MarshallPoe at 6:50 AM on September 9, 2010

A copy-machine repairman gets called out to fix a malfunctioning copier. When he arrives at the address, he's startled to see that it's a nudist colony, with dozens of people of all ages, shapes and sizes walking around without a stitch on. Feeling awkward, he makes his way to the office, where he's greeted by a man wearing nothing but tennis shoes and a smile, who introduces himself as the manager and shows the repairman the broken copier.

The repairman says, "So, what's wrong with the copier?"

And the nudist colony manager says, "It's streaking."
posted by Faint of Butt at 7:26 AM on September 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

After being in the Philly Naked Bike Ride this past weekend and giggling like a kid at the very idea of hundreds of naked cyclists tooling through the downtown of a major city (often to the applause and cheers of startled onlookers), all I can say is: Do you ever have any fun?? I agree with Walrus, you're just wrong for the job, attitude wise.
posted by djrock3k at 8:29 AM on September 9, 2010

most people do look better with their clothes on.

Interestingly, I have found the exact opposite to be true. Most people are significantly improved by shedding the garments they've stuffed themselves into. Underneath all the clothes, we're all skin and flesh. People work so hard to try and conceal the shape they are, but most people look marvelous naked. The people who look awkward and between sizes turn out to have wonderful hips. The stomach that looks so obscene hidden behind cloth looks plump and healthy in the light of day. The waddle under the chin that bothers so many? When it's not highlighted by the collar of a shirt, it fades away gently into their neck and shoulders. Those little love handles? Without pants to prop them up are just gentle curves around the hips.

I spend a lot of time naked around naked people. There are a few nude spas in the area, and I make a habit of going. Shedding everything that stands between you and sunlight feels marvelous. The wonderful side effect of coming home feeling more comfortable in your skin lasts for weeks. Until you've spent so much time bound by clothing that you forget that those lumps and bulges aren't yours. They're created by the clothes. So, you go back and lay in the sun. You look at all the beautiful people happy in every body type. Everyone looks better with their clothes off.
posted by stoneweaver at 9:04 AM on September 9, 2010 [1 favorite]

Huh. So, what was Yoffe's actual assignment? Because she mostly just wanders around being judgmental and petty, positing random unsubstantiated assertions, and halfheartedly reprinting verbatim quotes so that she can privately scoff at them.

I suppose she did achieve the aim of making sure that I don't want to see her cringing, whiny ass sans culottes.

I don't feel any motivation to be intentionally naked in public (though pajamas-for-sleeping are an abomination IMO), but I think possibly there's a better story in a nudist resort than mere LOLnudists.
posted by desuetude at 11:14 AM on September 9, 2010

I didn't read through the links yet but the user name "GnomeChompsky" mad my drink come out my nose. Just wanted you to know.
posted by WeekendJen at 1:01 PM on September 9, 2010

Pics or it didn't happen.
posted by daHIFI at 2:05 PM on September 9, 2010

This thread is useless without pict... Wait, that's Fark.
posted by arse_hat at 9:15 PM on September 9, 2010

My only visit to a nude beach was in college (the old Moonstone Beach, in Rhode Island) and I was fraught with anxiety. I kept my bathing suit on, while my friend shucked as soon as we got there. After a while I was fine. Until a guy about 15 years older than us appeared in front of us (we were sitting on the blanket, he was, um, standing about a foot away) and offered us a hit on a joint he was holding. He was definitely in "pick-up" mode. Other than that, most of the people went about their business and it was no great shakes.

Now, 25 years later, my SO and I often go nude around the house (well, I just go topless) and it's perfectly natural. When the kids are here, we make sure we're covered up, but I find it very relaxing to go without clothes when I'm home. Go figure.
posted by sundrop at 11:03 AM on September 10, 2010

I have had a serious crush on Emily Yoffe for a few years now. There is mental imagery going on right now that I just can't handle.
posted by Ber at 3:05 PM on September 12, 2010

I don't quite see the point of nudist clubs.. If I want to live a naked life, I can do it at home. But then, I guess the point of the club is to be sociable, which I rarely am.

Nude beaches make sense, however, and I have found that many people who would probably look bad in a bathing suit look much better without.
posted by djfiander at 3:41 PM on September 12, 2010