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August 22, 2001
12:32 PM   Subscribe

What the f__K?!!!
Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones!??? Is this really going to be the title? Apparently it has pissed off many fans.
posted by Sal Amander (52 comments total)

 
This has this 'hasn't this been discussed to death?' feeling to it, but then again, wasn't metafilter gone during then? Ohh well, yeah, the title is cheesy, the force was never with Lucas in the first place and who the heck really cares? I'll catch the damn thing on dvd in 2020 when he finally realises that the vhs tape is an aged medium.
posted by tiaka at 12:39 PM on August 22, 2001


I was just talking about this, oddly enough... there's a fun new title generator over at Brunching Shuttlecocks. My favorite one so far is "Planet of the Amazing Savage Yoda."

It's nice to laugh through the pain of having the passions of my childhood stomped on.
posted by kittyb at 12:40 PM on August 22, 2001


Oh, not the Star Wars fans! No, not them! Quick, distract them with tacos!
posted by solistrato at 12:40 PM on August 22, 2001


Because we all know a movie is all about the title of it...yeah.
posted by Mark at 12:41 PM on August 22, 2001


This has this 'hasn't this been discussed to death?' feeling to it, but then again, wasn't metafilter gone during then?

You bet it was gone and this hasn't been discussed before. I will NOT be a doublepost guy!!!
posted by Sal Amander at 12:45 PM on August 22, 2001


Even though 'The Clones Wars' seems like a much more marketable not to mention common sense title, it's funny that Wars fans are now experiencing the embarassment Whovians have had to put up with for years. Imagine going to your local music shop and buying something with titles like...

Attack of the Cybermen (of course)
The Macra Terror
The Krotons
Terror of the Autons
The Claws of Axos
Invasion of the Dinosaurs (the title Lucas probably would have given Jurassic Park given half the chance)
Terror of the Zygons
The Brain of Morbeus
The Talon of Weng-Chiang
Image of the Fandahl
The Invasion of Time
The Power of Kroll
The Horns of Nimon
Meglos
Mawdryn Undead
The Mark of the Rani
The Curse of Fenric
Castrovalva

...believe me Jedi's you got off easy. Not that Who hasn't spawned the odd cool title...

Ghostlight
An Unearthly Child
The Mind of Evil
Full Circle
Planet of Fire
Dragonfire
Storm Warning

...although such things are relative ... has anyone else got sci-fi or fantasy titles they love or love to hate (extra marks here if title is meaningless)?
posted by feelinglistless at 12:57 PM on August 22, 2001


Mmmmmm. Tacos.

*gets distracted*
posted by iceberg273 at 12:57 PM on August 22, 2001


Sorry, just thought of another Doctor Who one...there is actually a novel called 'Eternity Weeps'
posted by feelinglistless at 12:58 PM on August 22, 2001


I hate Krotons. They make my salad all crunchy.

(rimshot)
posted by jpoulos at 1:03 PM on August 22, 2001


has anyone else got sci-fi or fantasy titles they love

Manos, Hands of Fate!
posted by iceberg273 at 1:07 PM on August 22, 2001


Also Known As:
Mangos, Cans of Fruit (1966) (USA: working title)

Hee!
posted by kittyb at 1:15 PM on August 22, 2001


If you're truly a Star Wars 'fan', shouldn't you have way more blind faith than to get all uppity over a title?
(the figurative 'you' of course.. not meant at any specific person.. well... at least not on MeFi)

Besides... "A New Hope"? "Return of the Jedi"? I thing the cheesy precedent has been set...

Sheesh! and people wonder why he didn't want to make these movies.
posted by srw12 at 1:19 PM on August 22, 2001


AKA

Hands: The Hands of Fate
posted by Zettai at 1:20 PM on August 22, 2001


Oh come on! "Attack of the Clones" fits in perfectly with "The Empire Strikes Back" and "Return of the Jedi". The series, after all, is called "Star Wars". STAR WARS!

Try to erase all the warm fuzzy nostalgic connotations you have with that title, and think what your reaction would be to a movie that came out today called "Star Wars".
posted by ericost at 1:22 PM on August 22, 2001


I think "Attack of the Clones" is a perfect pinprick for everyone who takes Star Wars way too seriously. The Star Wars movies have always been half-cheesy bubble gum summer movies. This title is just a nod to that, a way of telling all the hyper-critical people who savaged Episode 1 to lighten up; it's just supposed to be a fun movie.
posted by straight at 1:25 PM on August 22, 2001


In a similar vein, The Brunching Shuttlecocks also had this amusing toy: "Christian Metal Band or Star Trek Episode"
posted by briank at 1:26 PM on August 22, 2001


I agree, straight. When I heard it, I just cracked up.
posted by fujikosmurf at 1:29 PM on August 22, 2001


It'll be all right, provided they don't use the line "Send in the clones!"
posted by crunchland at 1:32 PM on August 22, 2001


This is the perfect time for Spaceballs 2: The Search for More Money. Where's Mel when you need him?
posted by ODiV at 1:38 PM on August 22, 2001


"Send in the clones!"

Isn't it rich, are we a pair?
Me here at last on the ground,
You in mid-air.
Send in the clones.

Isn't it bliss, don't you approve?
One who keeps tearing around
One who can't move
Where are the clones?
Send in the clones.

Just when I'd stopped opening doors,
Finally knowing the one that I wanted was yours.
Making my entrance again with my usual flair,
Sure of my lines;
No one is there.

Don't you love farce?
My fault I fear,
I thought that you'd want what I want,
Sorry my dear
But where are the clones
There ought to be clones
Quick send in the clones

What a surprise!
Who could foresee
I'd come to feel about you
What you felt about me?
Why only now when I see
That you've drifted away?
What a surprise...
What a cliche'...

Isn't it rich, isn't it queer
Losing my timing this late in my career
And where are the clones
Quick send in the clones
Don't bother, they're here.


I dunno. It kinda fits.
posted by iceberg273 at 1:41 PM on August 22, 2001


yeah, like any title will make up for 45 minutes of on screen Jar-Jar time.
posted by jcterminal at 2:09 PM on August 22, 2001


Let us remember that one of Lucas' influences/inspirations for the Star Wars movies was old SciFi serial movies from the 50s and 60s like "Flash Gordon." So a slightly cheesy title is appropriate.

Even so, I disagree that "The Star Wars movies have always been half-cheesy bubble gum summer movies." True, they are a lot about being thrilling and entertaining, but as Joseph Campbell aptly pointed out, Lucas employed ancient archetypes of hero-myths into a sci-fi context in a way that hadn't quite been seen before. While I do think it would be silly to go around calling oneself a Jedi, or a follower of the "Jedi religion" like some do, I do think there's valuable deeper meaning there if you want to look for it.
posted by dnash at 2:17 PM on August 22, 2001


there's a valuable, deeper meaning in howard the duck, if you want to look for it.
posted by tewedle at 2:33 PM on August 22, 2001 [1 favorite]


Some people just can't admit to themselves that Star Wars is just an expensive B-movie. The title fits perfectly.
posted by skallas at 2:54 PM on August 22, 2001


Given the cultural currency of the Star Wars franchise and the malleability of memes... I wonder what effect The Attack of the Clones will have on embryonic stem cell research. If cloning produces a million JarJars, there's no way anyone would allow research on cloning in the United States. (Has anyone else thought of this?)
posted by LAM at 3:03 PM on August 22, 2001


Favorite movie title? no doubt about it, has to be The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living And Became Mixed-Up Zombies
An all time fave. Sorry about the Blockbuster link....It was the closest one, and it's late....
posted by bradth27 at 3:14 PM on August 22, 2001


Current Title Not Available For Rent

At Blockbuster - there's a surprise...
posted by feelinglistless at 3:27 PM on August 22, 2001


True, they are a lot about being thrilling and entertaining, but as Joseph Campbell aptly pointed out, Lucas employed ancient archetypes of hero-myths into a sci-fi context in a way that hadn't quite been seen before.

First of all, Joe Campbell sucks. SECOND OF ALL, Lucas has been coasting so long on this quasi-mythic explanation of his little space opera that people are actually BELIEVING it. Third of all, this pseudo-blessing by Campbell has allowed Lucas to get away with hack storytelling and has artificially inflated the reputation of a mildly interesting visual director with no people skills to absurd proportions. And fourth of all, Episode 1 was a rancid turd and a sorry excuse for entertainment, and I love that Lucas' little facade was blown.

Yeah, I loved Star Wars. WHEN I WAS FIVE.
posted by solistrato at 3:27 PM on August 22, 2001


Hey, sol...step off my boy J. Campbell. Rant on The Nutty Director all you want, but J.C. did some damn fine work. If you disagree, why? Give me something to work with here besides "Joseph Campbell sucks".
posted by Optamystic at 3:42 PM on August 22, 2001


Here we go again.
posted by feelinglistless at 3:44 PM on August 22, 2001


Basically, I don't buy the Hero's Journey. There are other mythic patterns besides that, and I think the undue emphasis upon that particular one is a bit over the top. That's all. I just said "J.C. sucks" because I was feeling saucy. :)
posted by solistrato at 3:50 PM on August 22, 2001


You know... the new Smith film "Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back" does a good job of bagging on those who have nothing better to do than bag on movies on the internet.
posted by afx114 at 4:13 PM on August 22, 2001


I never "got" Starwars and as for Joseph Campbell + Starwars, hrm, I think Andy Warhol imbued soup cans with more meaning.

Why? Joseph Campbell reads like some new-ageish pop-psychology book ala "Roads Less Traveled" It's repetitive and self-laudatory.

But having said that, I find him inoffensive. I think it's great that other's have found meaning and/or solace through his ideas. I just don't share their appreciation of his work.

"Attack of the Clones" is a stroke of BRILLIANCE on Lucas' part. Man, he really knows how to incense his fan base. Saying "I camped out in the rain for three days to get this ticket to see "Attack of the Clones" doesn't have quite the same ring about it somehow... ;)

Favorite B title; Val Lewton's atmospheric (and genuinely scary) "I Walked With A zombie"
posted by lucien at 4:19 PM on August 22, 2001


Surf Nazis Must Die. 'nough Said. An underrated film classic of the 1980's.
posted by ed at 4:36 PM on August 22, 2001


solistrato is my hero.
posted by Satapher at 4:54 PM on August 22, 2001


But didn't everyone say the same thing when The Phantom Menace came out? And look what happened then!
[Pause]
Oh...right. Shit.
posted by davidgentle at 5:00 PM on August 22, 2001


"I Walked With A zombie" is a great 13th floor elevators song.

and 13th floor elevators is a great band name.
posted by christina at 5:29 PM on August 22, 2001


I don't care what others call it, I'll be calling it "Anakin and the Cloneasaurus"
posted by deftone at 5:32 PM on August 22, 2001


... more publicity for the Raelians and their cloning ambitions!
posted by lairdj at 7:12 PM on August 22, 2001


The Fist, the Kicks and the Evil. I hereby vow to watch this film, when my mighty quest to locate it is complete.
posted by D at 8:05 PM on August 22, 2001


It bears mentioning that even Ewan McGregor thinks "it's a terrible, terrible title."
posted by Sinner at 9:29 PM on August 22, 2001


How about Star Wars: Obi-Wan Grows A Beard.
posted by Brilliantcrank at 10:03 PM on August 22, 2001


Or
Star Wars : It's A Goddamed Children's Movie, You 30-Something Virgin Scum.
posted by dong_resin at 10:37 PM on August 22, 2001


As a tenuous link to ed's "Surf Nazis Must Die" there is an Australian novel called "Freud and the Nazis go Surfing" that must be up there for an award as one of the great book titles.

As for Star Wars supposed attachments to hero mythology, I seem to recall Lucas confessing after the very first Star Wars that it was just his childhood fantasy stories. In other words some people get their underwear in knots and start religions over a guy's make-believe stories from when he was a kid.
posted by Option1 at 11:29 PM on August 22, 2001


Star wars was myth from its inception(myth in campbells sense and in the public eye) I saw the preview for Starwars when i saw 'Midway' that summer. I was mesmerized and did not care for Midway(I wanted to see Star Wars) my dad thought it neat but he saw that Midway could not compete with this 'New" kind of movie (midway sucked and i saw Star wars a few months later. The whole time waiting, i just imaged what the movie would entail hence a myth like experience. (Bukkake deathstar)
posted by clavdivs at 6:19 AM on August 23, 2001


Sure; there are clones. But that's not the real focus of the story, really. If I was a tubby egomaniacal multi-kabillionaire producer director, I would have went to the real heart of the story -

"Star Wars, Episode 2: Kid Yippee Gets Pissed Off".

That would Almost beat my current favorite -

"Rat Pfink A Boo - Boo"
posted by Perigee at 6:25 AM on August 23, 2001


Basically, I don't buy the Hero's Journey. There are other mythic patterns besides that, and I think the undue emphasis upon that particular one is a bit over the top.

You do realize that The Hero With a Thousand Faces is just one of his books, right? That he had a lot more to say than just that?

And as for Campbell being "New Age pop-psycholgy" shite, well, there's more scholarship in Campbell's four-volume Masks of God than in any New Age pop-psych book out there.
posted by dnash at 7:49 AM on August 23, 2001


Pesoanlly, I think Star Wars 2: JarJar in The Hood would be pretty catchy
posted by tj at 10:14 AM on August 23, 2001


As for Star Wars supposed attachments to hero mythology, I seem to recall Lucas confessing after the very first Star Wars that it was just his childhood fantasy stories.

I thought the whole point of Cambell's work was to point out that the Hero's Journey is simply a story that people keep retelling. Star Wars has it because lots of stories have it. Campbell's not saying Lucas is a genius for including it in Star Wars, he's saying "look how interesting it is that we keep telling the same story over and over. It's even in Star Wars."
posted by straight at 10:27 AM on August 23, 2001


Star Wars 2: Look, Just Give Me Your Fucking Money
posted by Skot at 10:33 AM on August 23, 2001


How about first trying to identify an original idea in the first Star Wars movie (as opposed to Star Wars, Episode 1 [librarians hate that kind of crap]).

Plot: The Hidden Fortress
Fight choreography: most asian samurai movies
Music: Holst

I gave up on Lucas long ago.
posted by djfiander at 10:34 AM on August 23, 2001


straight: I agree, as part of a broader point that Cambell was trying to make, that myth is not just a bunch of confusing old anecdotes that only classicists would get near, but is a living thing that suffuses all of our culture. Example: popular sci-fi movie. It doesn't make Star Wars profound by any means.
posted by D at 10:56 AM on August 23, 2001


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