August 29, 2001

1:12 PM

This is not the proper way to say happy birthdayMan has his package stolen on his birthday. Can anyone think of a worse birthday present?
posted by tj (13 comments total)

Yeah, I saw that story before but didn't post. Now I'll just toss out a comment from the peanut gallery: Is her name Lorena Bobbitt, by any chance?
posted by msacheson at 1:21 PM on August 29, 2001

I was having doubts, but I figured with the previous post, what the heck.

The thing that creeps me out is that said package was ripped off by hand.
posted by tj at 1:23 PM on August 29, 2001

ok, the post I was referring to is gone now, so I look like the freak.. oh well. Still, I was hoping to open this up to a worst birthday ever storyfest.
posted by tj at 1:32 PM on August 29, 2001

I guess it gives a whole new meaning to the term "hand job."

*ducks*
posted by mrbula at 1:33 PM on August 29, 2001

Hey, John McCain lost some of his manhood on his birthday today too!
posted by ktheory at 2:08 PM on August 29, 2001

Aw, shit, my birthday's coming up....
posted by UncleFes at 2:49 PM on August 29, 2001

The local radio station's (edge102) morning show will apparently try to get in contact with the wife tommorrow. Quality radio programming ensues.
posted by mkn at 3:03 PM on August 29, 2001

mkn: heh. guess anyone will do anything for hits - uh... listeners. is stile a DJ there?
posted by jcterminal at 3:07 PM on August 29, 2001

actually jcterminal , I view it as a byproduct of Howard Stern's influence on morning radio acroos North America
posted by tj at 3:11 PM on August 29, 2001

Right now (ca. 9:30 PM eastern) Canada's Talk Tv is broadcasting a discussion featuring genital specialist Dr. Robert Stubbs (best known for his penis extension surgery). Women hosts are perky and inquisitive, the men are cringing.

(If the link doesn't work, scroll to the bottom of the page to go directly to the Windows Media feed).
posted by maudlin at 6:38 PM on August 29, 2001

Ack! Ignore previous post: without a tv, you aren't seeing this tv discussion.
posted by maudlin at 6:42 PM on August 29, 2001

Dr. Robert Stubbs (best known for his penis extension surgery)

I have nothing to contribute, I just thought that that was a great name for a penis extension doctor. If only his first name was Richard, it would be perfect.
posted by Jart at 8:21 AM on August 30, 2001

Doctor > Doc > dock > to take away a part of
Robert > Bob > bob > to cut short
Stubbs > stubs > a short remaining piece
posted by pracowity at 8:53 AM on August 30, 2001