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November 4, 2010 8:30 PM   Subscribe

My name is l33tpolicywonk and I am not a douche. [via mefi projects]
posted by l33tpolicywonk (52 comments total) 5 users marked this as a favorite

 
I am embarrassed by midgets.
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 8:34 PM on November 4, 2010


Not really the facebook killer we're waiting for.
posted by mrnutty at 8:38 PM on November 4, 2010 [3 favorites]


I am a douche but it let me fill out a profile anyway.
posted by unSane at 8:39 PM on November 4, 2010 [1 favorite]


Needs more supporting my vertical screen size. Other than that, meh.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 8:40 PM on November 4, 2010


Okay, I'm going to try again (knowing now that I'm not going to get some fabulous explanation of my weird-arse personality).
posted by malibustacey9999 at 8:40 PM on November 4, 2010


Don't believe everything you read on the net.
posted by pompomtom at 8:42 PM on November 4, 2010


"What kind of douche are you? Explore the seven types"

That I would enjoy. But then I'm shallow.

(How shallow? Find out below the fold!)
posted by goodnewsfortheinsane at 8:43 PM on November 4, 2010


Nope. Sorry. Doesn't do anything for me.
posted by malibustacey9999 at 8:46 PM on November 4, 2010


I wish my brother's name was Wolfgang.
posted by Sailormom at 8:46 PM on November 4, 2010 [1 favorite]


I like this site.

Oh, and, I am not a douche.
posted by flapjax at midnite at 8:48 PM on November 4, 2010


There should be a space between "is" and the text field.
posted by kenko at 8:50 PM on November 4, 2010


Ok...where's the Kanye west theme song?
posted by The1andonly at 8:57 PM on November 4, 2010


I really like the design, and the simplicity of it all, and I generally really appreciate the whole project. I was pleasantly surprised to not be greeted by a smorgasbord of input fields to describe myself.

All in all excellent work.
posted by ejfox at 9:00 PM on November 4, 2010


You say you're not a douche, but I suspect filling out answers to these super-hilarious questions is a secret test you've failed.
posted by mrnutty at 9:02 PM on November 4, 2010 [3 favorites]


Here's my profile.
posted by Mayor Curley at 9:03 PM on November 4, 2010 [1 favorite]


Jesus fuck. Why didn't that work? Here it is.
posted by Mayor Curley at 9:04 PM on November 4, 2010 [1 favorite]


My least favorite friend is whomever made this piece of shit.

:-(
posted by Rory Marinich at 9:07 PM on November 4, 2010 [5 favorites]


Yep, not a douche.
posted by Mental Wimp at 9:07 PM on November 4, 2010


I like this.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 9:11 PM on November 4, 2010


Awww. The form does not indicate field length limits, so stuff gets cut off without warning, and there seems to be no way to edit answers.

The end result is that I only get a truncated version of "I stand starkly. You can't shock me. Bush 1 hates my rhymes like broccoli."
posted by darksasami at 9:18 PM on November 4, 2010 [11 favorites]


foo 19
posted by sammyo at 9:29 PM on November 4, 2010


rory marinich, what do you plan to douche next?
posted by the aloha at 9:31 PM on November 4, 2010


I'm almost to the avoid-using-the-word-douche-tipping point (not in any way because of the recent Metatalk thread, I hasten to add), but the implementation of this is lovely.
posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 9:34 PM on November 4, 2010


Something about reading the words "not a douche" automatically makes me think the people are douches.
posted by zephyr_words at 9:39 PM on November 4, 2010 [1 favorite]


...and I am not a douche.
posted by y2karl at 9:43 PM on November 4, 2010


Oh, this was made a while ago. So in this case "next" was still a year and a half ago.

I made this before I actually knew much CSS. The reason the design's so simple is I knew how to do colors and I knew how to do font size but that was basically it. I couldn't have done a column if I'd tried. And Adam (the programmer) and I essentially made this as a quick proof-of-concept so we could apply to YCombinator with my design for a writing community. (Funny because that design was intended as a DeviantART competitor, and DeviantART just came up today in a big way.)
posted by Rory Marinich at 9:43 PM on November 4, 2010 [2 favorites]


Here's mine and I'm annoyed by truncation and the lack of the ability to go back or reset.
posted by jimmythefish at 9:44 PM on November 4, 2010


douche overuse, now
posted by mistersquid at 9:46 PM on November 4, 2010


I think I missed the point.
posted by polyhedron at 9:46 PM on November 4, 2010 [1 favorite]


My name is MetaFilter and I am not a douche.
posted by unSane at 9:48 PM on November 4, 2010 [6 favorites]


goodnewsfortheinsane: "What kind of douche are you? Explore the seven types"

That I would enjoy. But then I'm shallow.

(How shallow? Find out below the fold!)


--- fold ---

I have douchebag hair.
I have Douchbag hair.
I am embarrassed by Douching.
I often misspell the word Douche.
I douched and wish I were a celebrity.
My least favorite friend is Douchman Flex.
I would like a Douche hug.
My favorite company is Douche Inc.


I didn't make this. Really, it was already there. I just found this douche, it's not me.
posted by filthy light thief at 9:52 PM on November 4, 2010


Ok.. had to try this out, and I win the Godwin reference test

http://notadouche.com/users/adolph
posted by MikeWarot at 9:52 PM on November 4, 2010


Yeah, that's a pretty common douche name thing.

Also I think probably the most fun part of launching this was seeing people deciding to make profiles using my name. Surreal, but fun.
posted by Rory Marinich at 10:04 PM on November 4, 2010


The thing this site does with links bothers me some reason that I cannot articulate.
posted by !Jim at 11:24 PM on November 4, 2010


Nice use of the douche tag.
posted by malapropist at 11:54 PM on November 4, 2010


It's the new MySpace!
posted by fourcheesemac at 2:53 AM on November 5, 2010


I can't help but notice a certain similarity in how we've filled out our profiles.. Hive mind? Zeitgeist? Or maybe special snowflakedom is an illusion we hide behind.
posted by Obscure Reference at 4:26 AM on November 5, 2010


This post makes me feel clean and refreshed.
posted by crunchland at 4:27 AM on November 5, 2010 [1 favorite]


I lol'd
posted by mippy at 4:35 AM on November 5, 2010


OK, the douchebag thing is out of control. First "Jersey Shore", then Jon Stewart, then Kanye, then George Takei, then... come on, people. Let's see some originality.

Not to mention that douchebags are actually nice things that clean vaginas. Which is much more than most of us can say about ourselves.
posted by fungible at 5:49 AM on November 5, 2010


Not to mention that douchebags are actually nice things that clean vaginas.

No!

Douchebags are toxic to vaginas. Douchebags are worse than useless. Douchebags are crap foisted on us by a misogynist commercial culture. DOUCHEBAGS MAKE WOMEN SICK.


This is true for both the literal and figurative douchebags.
posted by Sidhedevil at 6:03 AM on November 5, 2010 [4 favorites]


[citation]

Seriously, douchebags are bad for you. Avoid all douchebags.
posted by Sidhedevil at 6:05 AM on November 5, 2010


Not to mention that douchebags are actually nice things that clean vaginas.

You really don't want to get that argument started, fungible. Trust me on this one.

Oh wait. Sorry. Was bringing that up a douche move?
posted by bitter-girl.com at 6:26 AM on November 5, 2010


John Boehner is not a douche.
posted by scblackman at 6:45 AM on November 5, 2010


There's a problem with either the site or me, because I wasn't able to make a profile for myself. I was joking around and made a joke profile yesterday, and then registered today to make one for me. Instead, it appears that it locked in on Homer Simpson. Weird.
posted by explosion at 7:17 AM on November 5, 2010


so you're calling anyone who is not like you a douche?
that, sir, is douchy.
posted by krautland at 7:23 AM on November 5, 2010


Can I have my 5 minutes back?
posted by Goofyy at 7:55 AM on November 5, 2010


Some of my answers were too long and got truncated. That's the kind of douche I am.
posted by Decani at 9:28 AM on November 5, 2010


The one thing I can't help but continue to notice is that most four-syllable names, including mine but also for example Homer Simpson or MetaFilter as listed above, produce:

My name is yadda yadda, and I am not a douche

which scans perfectly when substituted for:

Miss Lucy had a steamboat. The steamboat had a bell.

I'm not sure what to make of this.
posted by darksasami at 2:06 PM on November 5, 2010 [2 favorites]


I am embarrassed by being seen reading giant words, especially words like "douche," and especially especially by my boss who thinks I'm still working. I am also slightly embarrassed by having my answer to that question cut off.

I like the colors a lot, though. They are very pretty and I want a sweater made out of them.
posted by Metroid Baby at 2:45 PM on November 5, 2010


Metroid Baby, bonus points for mentioning Chuck Knoblauch.
posted by Mental Wimp at 2:59 PM on November 5, 2010


These all cracked me up, but then again it's almost 2011 and I still laugh at anthropomorphic pictures of pets. I even laughed while making this profile (and only on preview noticed the 'certain similarity' in humour styles that Obscure Reference alluded to.)

Is it douchy to mention the grammar error in the monocle question? (How about in a passive aggressive questioning way?) (How about in a small, "Just trying to do this in a low-key, yet still obviously conspicuous way" font??) (AM I BEING DOUCHY YET???)
posted by Hardcore Poser at 11:25 PM on November 6, 2010


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