Fuck You If You Don't Like Eid & Channukah

December 1, 2010 10:45 PM

Fuck You If You Don't Like Christmas (NSFW Comedy Rap Song) by CRUDBUMP (aka Drew of Toothpaste for Dinner)

Previously on Metafilter:

Toothpaste for Dinner

posted by PostIronyIsNotaMyth (38 comments total)

Well, I wasn't plan on getting fucked today but okay. Fuck me!

But I do like antiques! Also, this video is hilarious and this guy is awesome. Where can I purchase the mp3?
posted by MaryDellamorte at 10:49 PM on December 1, 2010

BAM!

^right there!
posted by PostIronyIsNotaMyth at 10:52 PM on December 1, 2010

and, on the other hand, I found this to be tasteless and offensive... but, I'm an old fart whose opinion can't be trusted.
posted by HuronBob at 10:53 PM on December 1, 2010

Fuck you if you don't like this song,
Fuck you if you want me to get off your lawn.
posted by MaryDellamorte at 11:00 PM on December 1, 2010 [17 favorites]

there is nothing better than mefi posts after 2 am...
posted by HuronBob at 11:05 PM on December 1, 2010 [1 favorite]

Go Drew!

That sounds like a poorly-written sentence.
posted by germdisco at 11:07 PM on December 1, 2010

This post is for those of you in prior threads who said the definition of hipster was subjective.
posted by clarknova at 11:09 PM on December 1, 2010 [8 favorites]

see, the continuum works in strange ways.. when I was about 16, i thought that new group, the, what were they, beetles, beatles, whatever... were offensive... I mean, we had the Beachboys and Elvis, and such... those UK groups were, just, odd....

Now... the continuum has moved 180/360/0 degrees and we're back where we started...

now... get off my front lawn... except you, MD... you can hang out there for a while...

/ the philosophy major just screwed with my mind...
posted by HuronBob at 11:10 PM on December 1, 2010 [1 favorite]

This got old at "compact fluorescents". And I like compact fluorescents.
posted by micketymoc at 11:24 PM on December 1, 2010 [1 favorite]

buddy
posted by clavdivs at 11:25 PM on December 1, 2010

Oh man, I didn't know he was still making music! He also did KOMPRESSOR, which is totally worth checking out.
posted by NoraReed at 12:00 AM on December 2, 2010 [3 favorites]

I really, really want to buy this book.
posted by null terminated at 12:22 AM on December 2, 2010 [1 favorite]

I'm not a big fan of them seperately but I LOVE married to the sea.
posted by addelburgh at 1:04 AM on December 2, 2010

Well, fuck me then.
posted by chillmost at 1:43 AM on December 2, 2010

This is a great tune! While he will struggle in vain to defeat my fave Xmas song of all time, CRUDBUMP has earned a permanent spot on the Chichibio family holiday playlist. I wonder what Mother will make of it...
posted by Chichibio at 2:01 AM on December 2, 2010 [2 favorites]

i enjoy hanging out with the family but that's about it. other than that....

fuck you if you like the pervasive sleigh bells and glockenspiels in every single tv and radio ad and the sense of responsible consumerism it's supposed to trigger in all of us.

fuck you if you like that decorations are put up the day after halloween.

fuck you if you like parents who lie to their kids about santa as a means of lobbying for their good behaviour while appealing to their materialism. what a shitty shitty thing to do to a kid.

and of course i call it "the holidays" just in case any self important christian is within earshot.

fuck christmas.
posted by triceryclops at 2:51 AM on December 2, 2010 [14 favorites]

So would this be a bad time to ask for a day off, boss?
posted by le morte de bea arthur at 4:20 AM on December 2, 2010

always bring a baseball bat
posted by ohohcyte at 4:39 AM on December 2, 2010

I was going to favorite triceryclops' comment, but actually I kind of like sleighbells and glockenspiels.

But seriously, fuck Christmas.
posted by uncleozzy at 5:29 AM on December 2, 2010

There are other kinds of nog?
posted by chavenet at 5:29 AM on December 2, 2010 [1 favorite]

The only song of the season I like is Eric Idle's "Fuck Christmas." (I was going to include the link to Youtube but that just seemed to be too much in the spirit of holiday gift giving. Look it up yourselves, you sentimental bastards!)
posted by Uncle Chaos at 5:44 AM on December 2, 2010 [3 favorites]

I hate Christmas, and stand ready to receive my fucking.
posted by Ritchie at 5:50 AM on December 2, 2010 [1 favorite]

There are other kinds of nog?

Well sure.
posted by uncleozzy at 5:57 AM on December 2, 2010

fuck you if you like parents who lie to their kids about santa as a means of lobbying for their good behaviour while appealing to their materialism. what a shitty shitty thing to do to a kid.

My 3.5 year old kid's fucking daycare teachers did this to him. They use Santa to make the kids go to sleep!

I told him to tell them Santa's a nepotistic jew and he gives half-jews like my son get a pass on bad behavior. I really hope he pulls it off. We only have a few precious years when we can use him to shock others without getting in trouble.
posted by pjaust at 6:20 AM on December 2, 2010 [3 favorites]

fuck christmas AND I don't like you
posted by Eideteker at 6:25 AM on December 2, 2010

and of course i call it "the holidays" just in case any self important christian is within earshot.

Last December I saw Karl Rove in BWI as he and I were both heading home for Christmas. We were both in line at the Arby's so somehow we got to chatting and without thinking as he walked away I said "happy holidays!" which in retrospect was a very satisfying thing to do.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 6:36 AM on December 2, 2010 [2 favorites]

Here is his rap album, NA$TYJAM$.
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 6:41 AM on December 2, 2010

I think Fear really gets to the essence of the fucking christmas carol.
posted by bonsai forest at 6:42 AM on December 2, 2010 [1 favorite]

There are most certainly many kinds of nog.
posted by ciderwoman at 7:13 AM on December 2, 2010

I'm royally fucked.
posted by blucevalo at 7:29 AM on December 2, 2010

People who hate Christmas either don't understand that it's only there in the first place to distract us from how awful winter is, or they live somewhere with nice weather. As for me, I'll be getting drunk with my loved ones, playing stupid games, and eating cookies in warm, cozy homes all month. See you in January!
posted by oinopaponton at 8:35 AM on December 2, 2010 [1 favorite]

Fuck you if you don't like beardos.
Fuck you if you don't like "Fuck You" by Cee Lo.
posted by naju at 8:37 AM on December 2, 2010

I'm not a big fan of them seperately but I LOVE married to the sea.

My favorite comic.
posted by exogenous at 8:43 AM on December 2, 2010 [2 favorites]

Natalie Dee is a knitter, and I find just about every cardigan-related cartoon she has ever drawn both hilarious and awesome.
posted by bitter-girl.com at 8:45 AM on December 2, 2010

I am a huge fan of Drew and Natalie. This is great.

One of the most amazing videos Drew has ever done is put wacky stuff in his neti pot. I don't even like stuff like Jackass, but for some reason, watching this makes me cry with loling.
posted by thehmsbeagle at 9:02 AM on December 2, 2010

Fuck you if you don't like the "whoosh" sound a joke makes as it flies over someone's head.
posted by Solon and Thanks at 9:53 AM on December 2, 2010

To be honest, I'm a Jew and X-Mas doesn't really mean anything to me. Also, my birthday is on Boxing Day so I have to admit, I've always been a bit resentful of all the attention that Jesus guy receives.

I just liked the song, is all...
posted by PostIronyIsNotaMyth at 10:50 AM on December 2, 2010

I just liked the song, is all...
posted by PostIronyIsNotaMyth

I can't quite process your user name enough to tell if this is eponysterical or not.
posted by Rory Marinich at 11:59 PM on December 2, 2010