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Dr. Seuss does Star Wars
December 12, 2010 6:57 PM   Subscribe

Dr. Seuss does Star Wars. Transmogrifications by Seattle cartoonist Adam Watson.
posted by nrobertson (21 comments total) 24 users marked this as a favorite

 
Yay!
posted by phunniemee at 7:04 PM on December 12, 2010


The illustrations are fantastic, the scansion less so.
posted by TheWhiteSkull at 7:06 PM on December 12, 2010 [8 favorites]


Wow! Six whole pictures!
posted by Balisong at 7:08 PM on December 12, 2010


Would you turn to the Dark Side?
Would you, could you, young Jedi?
We could rule the galaxy!
We could rule it, you and me!
Try the Dark Side! Join with me!
You will like it, you will see!

Not with a Wookie, not in a cave,
Not with a droid, not with a slave!
I will not join you here or there,
I will not join you anywhere!
I do not like you! You are bad!
And I know you killed my dad!

No, Luke, that's not quite true!
Obi-Wan has lied to you.
I'm your father! Yes I am!
Sorry I cut off your hand!
posted by mattdidthat at 7:08 PM on December 12, 2010 [38 favorites]


Lorax!Yoda is adorable. I want a plushy.
posted by Faint of Butt at 7:20 PM on December 12, 2010 [1 favorite]


This made me so happy.
posted by meese at 7:27 PM on December 12, 2010


And so Vader's son learned a lesson that day,
A lesson his Dad should have known right away,
That if you are lucky enough to be trained
to be a great Jedi, there's so much to be gained.
But if you do nothing but whine, mope and sulk
Then prepare to be burned over much of your bulk
And trapped in a breathing-suit, year after year
While you yearn to be loved, but you'll only know fear

Though you think you're a world-crushing, force-choking bruiser
You'll still be the same little insecure loser.
posted by PlusDistance at 7:30 PM on December 12, 2010 [23 favorites]


The illustrations are fantastic, the scansion less so.

Yeah, this is what collaboration is for. We need to introduce PlusDistance to him.
posted by George_Spiggott at 7:47 PM on December 12, 2010


He makes Jabba look cuddly. (Of course, that's not as great a feat as Walt Disney making Quasimodo look cuddly.)
posted by Chocolate Pickle at 8:05 PM on December 12, 2010


posted by Faint of Butt Lorax!Yoda is adorable.

In a sticky wet swamp
At the dark end of space,
Once lived an old Jedi
With a wrinkled green face.
And deep through the trees
Where the Wookiee-grass grows,
Where the Swamp Slugs burp,
And the Bantha-wind blows,
If you close your eyes
You can still hear today
His odd way of speaking:
"Feel the Force, now you may!"
But who was the Yodax?
And why was he there?
And why was his syntax
Rearranged with such care?
Like Tourette's, but with prose?
The old Once-Luke still lives here.
Ask him. He knows.
posted by mattdidthat at 8:13 PM on December 12, 2010 [20 favorites]


The link is awesome, but the poetry in this thread is even better.
posted by immlass at 8:42 PM on December 12, 2010


The Light-Sided Jedi had bellies with stars.
The Dark-Sided Jedi had none upon thars.
posted by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 9:11 PM on December 12, 2010 [1 favorite]


MattDidThat and PlusDistance,

Please come to my home every night and make silly Seuss Wars rhyme before you tuck me in bed.

Love,
liza
posted by liza at 9:16 PM on December 12, 2010


Holy crap would like I like to own the entire Dr. Seuss Star Wars Trilogy.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 2:43 AM on December 13, 2010


Grrr, trapped in airport can't type...
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 2:43 AM on December 13, 2010


Surely the word 'transmogrification' ought to mean 'to turn into a cat'.
posted by Sutekh at 4:09 AM on December 13, 2010


not a cat, sutekh, a tiger: a tuna sandwich, best-friend stalking, smoochies loving tiger.
posted by liza at 6:14 AM on December 13, 2010


Let's mash the poetry here and the pics, and publish it together. Don't know which is the best.
posted by Vanifriss at 6:51 AM on December 13, 2010


Meh. Link led with the best picture first, which was a let-down. But I love poetry threads.
posted by Night_owl at 8:40 AM on December 13, 2010


Yesterday I found out that 'transmogrification' is actually a word, not an invention of Bill Watterson.
posted by nrobertson at 12:31 PM on December 13, 2010


Did I ever tell you about Jedi Ozode,
Who reached forking paths on his mystical road?
One said to Side Dark, and the other, Side Light.
So Ozode had to make up his mind which was right.

Well…Ozode scratched his chin, and his black Jedi pants.
And he said to himself, “I’ll be taking a chance
If I go to Side Dark. Hmm, I hear that it's evil!
And may be infested with bedbugs and weevils.

On the other hand though, I’ll be sort of a fool
If I go to Side Light as it's not quite as kewl.
And who wants to die in a light-saber fight?
So, maybe Side Dark is the best, not Side Light,

But then again, what if Side Dark is too Dark?
And I end up some miserable emo monarch
So Side Light may be best! But I doubt my insight…
What might happen to me if Side Light is too Light?
I might miss some awesome force powers to be had
So Side Dark may be best,” and he turned to the bad.

Then he stopped, and he said, “What Would Skywalker do….
What would Skywalker…Skywalker…Skywalker do…”

And for 36 parsecs and a half that Ozode
Made starts and made stops at the fork in the road.
Saying, “Which Skywalker? Wait! Books or just movies?”
Then he got an idea that was wonderfully Groovy!

"Trust in my feelings! I'll trust them completely!
Close my eyes, spin and walk, well, that solves it neatly
And that’s how Ozode, the Jedi Knight true
Tripped over a rock and fell in Bantha do.
posted by Sparx at 2:04 PM on December 13, 2010 [1 favorite]


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