Skip

Papal gymnasticis
December 15, 2010 4:42 PM   Subscribe

Papal gymnastics. Just your typical day at the Vatican. Topless muscle-bound gymnasts perform for the Pope, appreciative cardinals and waving nuns. Make your own jokes.
posted by illy (45 comments total) 9 users marked this as a favorite

 
Apparently I need to get elected the pope.
posted by kavasa at 4:44 PM on December 15, 2010


Topless muscle-bound gymnasts perform for the Pope, appreciative cardinals, beatin' bishops and waving nuns.

FTFY
posted by fleetmouse at 4:44 PM on December 15, 2010


"I'm just as God made me, sir."
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 4:46 PM on December 15, 2010


Well, the nuns were certainly digging it. Are those Terrible Towels they're waving? Me, I was more interested in the acrobats' helper, Emma Peel.
posted by The Card Cheat at 4:48 PM on December 15, 2010 [5 favorites]


I was waiting for the moment where a nun would stuff a fiver into the waistband of one of the gymnasts.

Then I was waiting to see if the Pope would follow suit with a Benjamin.
posted by bwg at 4:52 PM on December 15, 2010 [2 favorites]


Andrew Sullivan is going to have a field day with this vid.
posted by longdaysjourney at 4:53 PM on December 15, 2010 [2 favorites]


Yo, Papal gymnastics, I'm really happy for you, I'ma let you finish, but breakdancing for the pope was the best Papal audience of all time!
posted by The Card Cheat at 4:53 PM on December 15, 2010 [17 favorites]


Profoundly gay. Steeped in gayness.
posted by Joe Beese at 4:58 PM on December 15, 2010 [7 favorites]


Oh man, the nuns are waving their hankies so gleefully. I AM DELIGHTED BY THIS.
posted by elizardbits at 4:59 PM on December 15, 2010 [3 favorites]


Andrew Sullivan is going to have a field day with this vid.

Friend of mine was in seminary when the white smoke started flowing from St. Peter's Square. Ratzinger was known to be conservative, so there was some speculation about how his papacy would impact Vatican II, etc. One of the older guys (I want to say a monk? Not sure) said "well, I hope the gays don't think they're going to get any breaks just because the pope is one of them."

Just sayin'. Andrew Sullivan isn't the only one.
posted by Joey Buttafoucault at 4:59 PM on December 15, 2010 [3 favorites]


Gym-gnostics
posted by Frank Grimes at 5:01 PM on December 15, 2010 [11 favorites]


but breakdancing for the pope was the best Papal audience of all time!

that wasn't real, was it? nah, couldn't be

but if it was, the way the Pope was gesticulating as if emphasizing the dope beats was one of the best things I've ever seen
posted by angrycat at 5:01 PM on December 15, 2010 [4 favorites]


> the way the Pope was gesticulating as if emphasizing the dope beats was one of the best things I've ever seen

Those were Papal Props, and they are rarely granted.
posted by The Card Cheat at 5:05 PM on December 15, 2010 [37 favorites]


the guy being the base for that has mad strength skills. that's a lot of leg stability happening there.
posted by rmd1023 at 5:09 PM on December 15, 2010


Bah, Mr. Sullivan: a one comment? You can do better than that.
posted by longdaysjourney at 5:10 PM on December 15, 2010


Whoops: "one-line comment". Sorry.
posted by longdaysjourney at 5:11 PM on December 15, 2010


Wait, what? Papal audience? Acrobats? What's the idea here supposed to be?

The pope demands chuckles! Bring him a jolly troupe of jesters and troubadours to lighten his mood, and let us all grin sycophantically! Note the pope's expression! Is he displeased? Troubled? Incensed by the decadent pageantry?

Like, is that the mindset? Let's all entertain the pope?
posted by awenner at 5:13 PM on December 15, 2010 [5 favorites]


the way the Pope was gesticulating as if emphasizing the dope beats

The L'Osservatore Romano reporter wrote:

His Holiness quoted John 3:8. "You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going."
posted by Joe Beese at 5:13 PM on December 15, 2010 [1 favorite]


Pope licks lips, adjusts seat, and dreams.
posted by pianomover at 5:35 PM on December 15, 2010 [1 favorite]


[few comments removed - every post about the pope does not need to become a post about pedophiles. Don't like it? go to metatalk.]
posted by jessamyn at 5:51 PM on December 15, 2010 [2 favorites]


Those were Papal Props, and they are rarely granted.

Verbum!
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 5:52 PM on December 15, 2010 [1 favorite]


reminds me of an old hymn...
posted by ennui.bz at 5:53 PM on December 15, 2010 [2 favorites]


I'm just glad those gymnasts are getting some publicity. The Nair® bills alone must be bankrupting them.
posted by PlusDistance at 5:57 PM on December 15, 2010 [1 favorite]


I have it on good authority that this is the next act up at the papal palace.
posted by madamjujujive at 6:33 PM on December 15, 2010 [4 favorites]


the guy being the base for that has mad strength skills. that's a lot of leg stability happening there.

I agree!

Like Joe Ratzinger, when I saw that I winched myself to the semi-vertical in approbation.
posted by Short Attention Sp at 7:07 PM on December 15, 2010 [2 favorites]


Man, no matter how bad a day I'm having, the "It's Raining Men" video always put a smile on my face.

Martha Wash for Pope!
posted by evidenceofabsence at 7:09 PM on December 15, 2010


"Joey Buttafoucault"

+1
posted by bardic at 7:57 PM on December 15, 2010 [1 favorite]


The pope was simply impressed by the way these athletes could stay balanced without tumbling to the ground. The pope appreciates in-fall-ability.

I made that joke myself, yes I did!
posted by twoleftfeet at 9:06 PM on December 15, 2010 [18 favorites]


If I learned anything from this post, it's that no matter how many times I encounter it, knowing full well the context in which it's being used, I am apparently only capable of reading "Papal" as "Paypal."
posted by Sys Rq at 9:10 PM on December 15, 2010 [2 favorites]


Well, the nuns were certainly digging it.

I think RT threw that footage of the nuns in to play up the angle they were obviously going for. Wherever those nuns are, they're obviously not in the same room as the Pope.
posted by no mind at 10:14 PM on December 15, 2010


I know I'm not the only one that saw "Paypal gymnastics."
posted by dirigibleman at 10:17 PM on December 15, 2010


Oh, fuck, I totally missed that this was from Russia Today. That explains the obviously dubbed-in '80s porno music.

RT is terrible. Nothing they transmit is credible at all. It's pure Kremlin propaganda. Remember how Pope John Paul II contributed to the disintegration of the USSR? I'll bet Putin does.
posted by Sys Rq at 10:34 PM on December 15, 2010


Not that I stared very carefully at particular aspects of this video, but I could swear that the acrobats are wearing thongs under their white pants. No VPLs before the pope, I see.
posted by LMGM at 11:48 PM on December 15, 2010


I think all these gay jibes are bit out of order... he's probably just thinking back fondly to his days in the Hitler Youth.
posted by fearfulsymmetry at 3:28 AM on December 16, 2010 [2 favorites]


Yesterday: lithe young fellows breakdancing in front of Pope John Paul
Today: buff young fellows doing gymnastics in front of Pope Benedict
Tomorrow: lapdancing young fellows for cardinals and nuns to keep them chaste

Progress, people, progress.
posted by MuffinMan at 3:38 AM on December 16, 2010


Like awenner was getting at, what's the backstory to this? Are these performances a regular occurence? Like, once a month there's a talent show?
posted by bwilms at 4:21 AM on December 16, 2010


I don't get why the impromptu "kind of off to the side of the pope and on a tiny rug" positioning.

I'd comment on the evilly lascivious look Ratzinger was giving those guys but he looks like that all the time.
posted by DU at 4:48 AM on December 16, 2010 [2 favorites]


I thought the pontiff looked old, and frail. But maybe that was just the stark contrast with the performers. The whole thing seemed odd. As someone above mentioned, what's with the side-ways thing? Was the performance cut short? The video seemed way too short to even bother.
posted by Goofyy at 5:11 AM on December 16, 2010


I thought the pontiff looked old, and frail.

Well, his coat is torn and frayed.
It's seen much better days.
But just as long as the guitar plays,
it'll steal your heart away.
STEEEAL YOUR HEART AWAAAY.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 5:25 AM on December 16, 2010


I have it on good authority that this is the next act up at the papal palace.
posted by madamjujujive at 9:33 PM on December 15


dead

Dead

DEAD

i could favorite this comment a million times, i would because that's EXACTLY what i was thinking of when i was watching, in disbelief, this video :D

and as to the entertainment, yes, the Pope rolls like a King with jesters and such. and depending on the country, cardinals do this kind of thing too. in Puerto Rico though, the cardinal limits these audiences to special holidays, mostly christmas.

so, as far as i can remember from being a catholic, these happen on special saints feasts and it's a BFD to get invited to entertain the Pope.
posted by liza at 5:39 AM on December 16, 2010


This reminded me of this joke, sent to the LRB by Scott Haas in response to this piece by Colm Toibin:

'Terence Cardinal Cooke of New York convened his bishops and ordered that in accordance with new austerity measures all clergy at Mass would henceforth be required to limit their number of attending altar boys to one and also to wear simple black robes rather than the usual colourful garb. All agreed. Mass the following Sunday began with a parade of obedient clergy: one boy per bishop, all black. But when Terence Cardinal Cooke entered the church, he was preceded and followed by no fewer than eight handsome boys and was dressed, head to toe, in beautiful robes of purple, red and gold. After he took his seat, the bishop seated in the row behind him leaned forward and whispered in his ear: "Terence, you bitch."'
posted by Mocata at 8:08 AM on December 16, 2010 [3 favorites]


I'd comment on the evilly lascivious look Ratzinger was giving those guys but he looks like that all the time

I know it's cliché to remark on it at this point, but I'm honestly incapable to looking at the pope, wearing his robes and surrounded by opulence, and not seeing the Emperor. I figure that sunken look he's throwing around is him deciding who's next going to get lit up with lightning.

All he needs to do is get the Swiss guard to wear red capes and full face helmets and he'll have perfected the image.
posted by quin at 9:05 AM on December 16, 2010 [2 favorites]


I got curious - it seems like this is their standard routine.
Fratelli Pellegrini!
posted by Tchad at 10:24 AM on December 16, 2010


this is one of the most bizarre things I've ever seen.
posted by mike3k at 2:56 PM on December 16, 2010


Anyone else read Baron Corvo's "Hadrian VII"? I seem to remember semi-naked gymnastics being part of that pope's daily routine.
posted by nja at 12:51 AM on December 17, 2010


« Older Does the language we speak shape our thoughts? -...   |   "In a mass marketing culture a... Newer »


This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments



Post