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January 28, 2011 4:40 AM   Subscribe

Star Trek Girl (WARNING: SLYT)
posted by valkane (73 comments total) 7 users marked this as a favorite

 
"Traveling at the speed of light"???

UH HELLO WARP 1? NOT VERY FAST, STAR TREK GIRL, HOW ABOUT YOU GO BACK TO SAN FRANCISCO WITH THE REST OF THE BUREAUCRATS, I'M OUT HERE DOIN LIKE WARP 9
posted by Greg Nog at 4:52 AM on January 28, 2011 [25 favorites]


I suppose I'd like to hear more about Star Trek.
posted by Maaik at 4:57 AM on January 28, 2011


She called them "trekkies"? Uh-oh, that won't go over very well with the trekkers.
posted by NoMich at 4:59 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


This is only funny if you think women aren't into Star Trek.
posted by crossoverman at 5:04 AM on January 28, 2011 [7 favorites]


She called them "trekkies"? Uh-oh, that won't go over very well with the trekkers.

Much less the the trekkanistas. Hoo boy!
posted by From Bklyn at 5:06 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


Computer: Run level 2 diagnostics on environmental lighting and inertial dampening systems.
posted by zengargoyle at 5:07 AM on January 28, 2011 [22 favorites]


Man, the clipping on that audio track is brutal.
posted by arcolz at 5:09 AM on January 28, 2011 [3 favorites]


This is only funny if you think women aren't into Star Trek.

Or if you listen to the jokes in the lyrics.

I'd rather meet the girl that appears right before the rap section. TOS4EVA!!
posted by DU at 5:15 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


Computer, engage Autotune.

I'm grateful for this post because it introduced me to this post. :)
posted by zarq at 5:17 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


Or if you listen to the jokes in the lyrics.

They are only funny if you think she is the only girl into Star Trek.
posted by crossoverman at 5:19 AM on January 28, 2011


Come for the Star Trek song, stay for the VJ prattle.
posted by Ritchie at 5:22 AM on January 28, 2011


I have a bad feeling that about 8 people will drop this link on me today.
posted by functionequalsform at 5:24 AM on January 28, 2011 [2 favorites]


This seems like as good a place as any to share this old favorite of mine.
posted by Gator at 5:25 AM on January 28, 2011 [2 favorites]


Anyone else caught the Muse-Bliss riff right before the rap section?
posted by Kickdrum at 5:27 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


Anyone else get somewhat offended when people wear captain's insignia? It's like, show a little respect, young lady.
posted by knave at 5:27 AM on January 28, 2011 [8 favorites]


Anyone else get somewhat offended when people wear captain's insignia?

Yes. And "command red"? What did you do to earn that?
posted by King Bee at 5:40 AM on January 28, 2011 [5 favorites]


I'm totally sure that the girl with pigtails in the blue with the GIANT SUNGLASSES is just projecting what she thinks future-folk will use for eye/sun protection and most definitely not because she wants to keep her identity shielded from the interwebs.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 5:42 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


I speak from the heart when I say that possibly the last thing we Trekkers need is more false hope that we have a shot at cute women just because they're into Star Trek.
posted by Muddler at 5:48 AM on January 28, 2011 [3 favorites]


What did you do to earn that?

You don't deserve to wear that uniform.
posted by uncleozzy at 6:00 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


That looks like more fun to have made than to watch. The result was absolutely tedious.
posted by artlung at 6:02 AM on January 28, 2011 [9 favorites]


Would it even be possible to have more auto tune?
posted by cccorlew at 6:04 AM on January 28, 2011 [2 favorites]


I was going to forward this to the person I usually send silly Star Trek and Star Wars related interweb stuff to and then after about a minute and a half I decided not to.
posted by zzazazz at 6:08 AM on January 28, 2011 [2 favorites]


I actually don't mind the abusive tuning, but it really irks me that she didn't also grid-align the vocals. Slop. Py.

Man, the clipping on that audio track is brutal.
Limiters on Kill, amirite?
posted by uncleozzy at 6:09 AM on January 28, 2011 [3 favorites]


How do you say "Meh" in Klingon?
posted by briank at 6:09 AM on January 28, 2011 [5 favorites]


Would it even be possible to have more auto tune?

How much more auto-tune could it be? The answer is none. None more auto-tune.
posted by kmz at 6:12 AM on January 28, 2011 [6 favorites]


Could. Not. Even. Watch. Moved to a different tab, listened for one minute, and bleurghh.
posted by seanyboy at 6:14 AM on January 28, 2011


Hear that mighty rumble and fap? That, I fear, is the sound of reddit coming.

I think "Rumble and Fap" would have been a much better name for a U2 album than Rattle and Hum. Apropos of nothing.
posted by Decani at 6:23 AM on January 28, 2011 [6 favorites]


She's got a thing she does where she jumps up and down and puts her hands on her chest. You might notice it.
posted by Wolfdog at 6:28 AM on January 28, 2011


People really need to learn that in an all digital workflow, you gotta apply soft clipping if you are going to clip. Of course, most of the clipping is in error, I guess telling them how to clip isn't going help.

I don't really get this stuff. I suppose if I pretend it isn't "music" but instead is a "skit", it kinda makes sense. But a skit wouldn't offend that part of my brain that likes music.
posted by Bovine Love at 6:34 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


I gave up about halfway through and just started watching "Do You Want to Date My Avatar?"
posted by moviehawk at 6:40 AM on January 28, 2011 [6 favorites]


Where the SG-1 girls at?
posted by Ad hominem at 6:50 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


Greg Nog, warp 1 is a perfectly justifiable speed. You'll recall Force of Nature, which clearly established anything over warp 5 as destructive to the space-time continuum.
posted by Jpfed at 6:56 AM on January 28, 2011 [3 favorites]


Where the SG-1 girls at?

Pottery Barn.

Where the Babylon 5 girls at?
posted by fleetmouse at 6:58 AM on January 28, 2011 [2 favorites]


1:16
posted by Reverend John at 7:14 AM on January 28, 2011


That was unbearable.
posted by dobbs at 7:16 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


Where the Babylon 5 girls at?

Babylon 5 girls all with Zathras. Zathras happy not have to make out with Zathras so much. Zathras an inconsiderate lover, not GGG like Zathras is.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 7:24 AM on January 28, 2011 [13 favorites]


I know that's a TNG uniform, but being primarily a TOS fan, I kept expecting her to die.
posted by Flunkie at 7:29 AM on January 28, 2011 [5 favorites]


You know, in retrospect, growing up and being a dorky teen wasn't that bad. I didn't get atomic wedgies, swirlies, or even have to deal with bullying at school. The thing that seemed rough at the time was the feeling of exclusion for liking geeky stuff - spending study hall drawing maps for your D&D campaign or learning Tolkien's runic alphabet was not something you wanted to be seen doing, if you wanted to have any hope of being cool. And you really would not broadcast the fact that you were going to a meeting of the Klingon Defense League, or that you would still dress up in what you thought a hobbit's clothes should look like, and run around the woods or whatever.

It was a weird place to be - on the one hand, I genuinely liked those things, and yet still felt kind of embarrassed for liking them.

I knew I wasn't cool and wasn't trying to be, and yet I still longed for a world where you could have a discussion about whether mithril could withstand a heron-mark sword, or whether you'd rather have the Death Star or a lightsaber, and not have everyone else in earshot rolling their eyes and laughing.

In some ways, being an outsider was preferable to this era of "nerdsploitation" that we're in now - which feels fake, designed to generate revenue, and panders to the most superficial elements of geek nostalgia. It feels like someone is trying to sell me something, without any understanding of what I enjoyed about the things they're copying.

William Gibson had a great line about near-future subcultures being almost obsolete, because as soon as a trend started to emerge, quick-thinking ad/branding/fashion agencies would leap on it and market it to death. Like much of his writing, it's a prescient descriptor of the world we're seeing now.

And that's why I didn't enjoy this video. It's lazy - say what you will about the Big Bang Theory, at least they do the research and get the terminology right for their jokes - and contrived.

In conclusion, get off my lawn.
posted by dubold at 7:29 AM on January 28, 2011 [8 favorites]


Wait a minute. She says she'll be my Number One, but she's wearing Captain's insignia.

Hah!
posted by oddman at 7:37 AM on January 28, 2011


They're no Warp 11. Oh, Kiki Stockhammer, the original Felicia Day.
posted by infinitewindow at 7:39 AM on January 28, 2011 [3 favorites]


panders to the most superficial elements of geek nostalgia. It feels like someone is trying to sell me something, without any understanding of what I enjoyed about the things they're copying.

When I was trying to pinpoint why I wasn't fond of this video, "pandering" is exactly the word that came to mind; it all feels kinda surface-level and loveless, like a song about The Simpsons that goes "Homer is the father, and Marge is the mother, then there's Lisa and Bart and Maggie and they all live in Springfield"
posted by Greg Nog at 7:44 AM on January 28, 2011 [11 favorites]


What do you have to do to earn Command Red?

Survive a landing party mission.
posted by zippy at 7:46 AM on January 28, 2011


that should have read (WARNING: SUCK)
posted by puny human at 7:58 AM on January 28, 2011


In some ways, being an outsider was preferable to this era of "nerdsploitation" that we're in now - which feels fake, designed to generate revenue

I know what you mean, looking at the "evolution of the geek" chart posted yesterday I can't help but feel some of the categories seem a little iffy. Glee Geek? c'mon!. Whats next, "Budwiser and Wings Geek", "Hookers and Blow Geek"?

Guess the word just means aficionado now.
posted by Ad hominem at 8:05 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


Guess the word just means aficionado now.

Well, as "geek" used to be a term for circus freaks, arguably the definition has changed a lot over time.
posted by dubold at 8:16 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


Sorry, but this is the best Star Trek music video on the intertubes.
posted by Zozo at 8:19 AM on January 28, 2011 [8 favorites]


Fascinating
posted by medium format at 8:24 AM on January 28, 2011 [2 favorites]


What we are seeing is the Urban Outfitter marketing model being applied to geek/nerd sub-culture. Marshall McLuhan suggested that advertising was evolutionary race to exploit more & more smaller niche markets. e. g. the long tail. Be prepared for the mining even more esoteric groups. Birders? Beer can collectors?
posted by Lex Tangible at 8:25 AM on January 28, 2011


"Hookers and Blow Geek"
Charlie Sheen has finally found his people.
posted by jrishel at 8:26 AM on January 28, 2011 [2 favorites]


Sorry, but this is the best Star Trek music video on the intertubes.

I'll see your Ke$ha and raise you Kirk/Spock slash
posted by Greg Nog at 8:28 AM on January 28, 2011 [4 favorites]


Things that the Federation has outlawed:

1) Interfering in the affairs of pre-warp civilizations.

2) Genetic engineering.

3) Going to Talos IV.

4) Autotune.
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:29 AM on January 28, 2011 [3 favorites]


Punk Rock Girl
posted by the painkiller at 8:35 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


Is autotune over yet?
</getoffmylawn>
posted by Songdog at 8:51 AM on January 28, 2011


My personal favorite Star Trek video. Best seen without any context and/or explanations. (I may have been introduced to this video by metafilter, but what the hell. Some of you may not have seen it.)
posted by neuromodulator at 8:52 AM on January 28, 2011 [3 favorites]


How much more auto-tune could it be? The answer is none. None more auto-tune.

Srsly. I suspect that in the original footage she's simply reciting or chanting tunelessly like a cheerleader. And shooting it in a bus station rest room is a reference I don't get somehow.
posted by George_Spiggott at 8:53 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


Beverly Crusher: The Early Years
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 8:56 AM on January 28, 2011 [3 favorites]


I like the incredibly dim lighting, the sunglasses, and the indiscriminate mixing of original and next gen uniforms (and even one "uniform" that's no such thing). It's just like Star Trek, and shows how much research and thought was put into this.

Or, you know, not.
posted by splice at 9:14 AM on January 28, 2011


This young person is clearly saying/singing "Star TRACK"

I weep for the future.
posted by humboldt32 at 9:26 AM on January 28, 2011


briank: "How do you say "Meh" in Klingon"

Mech!
posted by brundlefly at 9:33 AM on January 28, 2011 [4 favorites]


This young person is clearly saying/singing "Star TRACK"

Precise vowel sounds do not survive that kind of vocal processing any better than actual fruit molecules survive the transition to Froot Loops.
posted by Wolfdog at 9:35 AM on January 28, 2011 [3 favorites]


Colm Meaney would not approve
posted by minifigs at 10:02 AM on January 28, 2011 [2 favorites]


In some ways, being an outsider was preferable to this era of "nerdsploitation"

Oh no! A nerd hipster! Nipster? Nerdster? I can't keep up. And I don't even have a lawn.
posted by Decani at 10:09 AM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


Every girl is Number One to R Kelly.
posted by spock at 10:13 AM on January 28, 2011


My starship goes up to 11.
posted by Crabby Appleton at 10:37 AM on January 28, 2011


They're no Warp 11. Oh, Kiki Stockhammer, the original Felicia Day.

Oh please. Warp 11 is the sober man's No Kill I.
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 11:40 AM on January 28, 2011


My starship goes up to 11.
posted by Crabby Appleton at 6:37 PM on January 28


This Starship only goes up to one-and-a-half.
posted by Decani at 12:07 PM on January 28, 2011


I dislike this video. Girls who like Star Trek are much, much cuter and better dancers.
posted by typewriter at 1:46 PM on January 28, 2011


George Takei: Meh.
posted by bwg at 3:55 PM on January 28, 2011


best star trek mash up, says I
posted by Redhush at 5:55 PM on January 28, 2011 [1 favorite]


also slightly more amusing than that "music" video
posted by Redhush at 6:57 PM on January 28, 2011


I'd totally hit that.
posted by dougrayrankin at 2:05 PM on January 29, 2011


Happy. Happy in Paraguay with some sort of horny fish.
posted by erniepan at 10:54 PM on January 29, 2011 [1 favorite]


Why don't we make apple juice, and fax it to each other.
posted by infinitewindow at 8:11 AM on January 30, 2011


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