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Activity from Frowner

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Aging isn't the same as disability, even though there are overlaps in experience. I know younger people with disabilities and, for the most part, their conditions are relatively stable and fairly predictable - a decent and well-run society could... [more]
favorited 5 times, recently by caryatid, FelliniBlank, erlking, Blue Jello Elf, Rosie M. Banks
MeFi comment - 3 minutes ago

I'm not rich and I'm never going to be rich. If I could be assured of decent health care and enough money to live on, sure I'd want to live past 75. But as it is, I'm pretty sure that I'll be left miserably alone and disabled in a warming world, or... [more]
favorited 9 times, recently by caryatid, nicepersonality, Memo, mygothlaundry, KHAAAN!, symbioid, erlking, blucevalo, Melismata
MeFi comment - 5 minutes ago

Just like how in Victorian households they wouldn't want to learn the maids' names, or maybe the maids would have lower class names or ethnic names, so they'd just call them all "Jane", etc. One thing I like about the one percent - they... [more]
favorited 13 times, recently by kagredon, Proofs and Refutations, kewb, vickyverky, Lexica, maxwelton, bakerina, beefetish, klangklangston, RedOrGreen, latkes, Cash4Lead, TheWhiteSkull
MeFi comment - 52 minutes ago

As I was thinking about this, two more things occurred to me: 1. I wonder if you have some control stuff going on - maybe you have trouble accepting that plans aren't always going to come together and decisions will be made on the fly, or you have... [more]
favorited 1 time, recently by Gray Skies
Ask MeFi comment - An hour ago

Here's the thing: as stated, almost everyone has issues with their parents, and almost everyone finds a way to come to terms with that eventually, with or without their parents continued involvement in their lives. By contrast, I think that... [more]
favorited 17 times, recently by lemerle
Ask MeFi comment - An hour ago

That's not aging, except in the sense that we're all aging. My brother's 30-something friend got hit by a truck crossing the street and had a devastating head injury, which she was in no way economically or otherwise equipped to deal with. My... [more]
favorited 1 time, recently by andraste
MeFi comment - An hour ago

(And again, that's where personality and access to care come in - I don't like avoidable risk, personally, and I don't trust this society to do right by me when I'm vulnerable. As un avoidable risk starts to climb, there comes a point where... [more]
favorited 1 time, recently by Rosie M. Banks
MeFi comment - Almost 6 hours ago

(As someone who has been varying degrees of secretarial, I want to add that if you are expecting your secretary ( who is undoubtedly not trained to do this and probably makes a lot less money than you) to stop the people who you cannot stop, you need... [more]
favorited 37 times, recently by shadowy_world
Ask MeFi comment - Almost 6 hours ago

When I was younger, I actually got a kick out of going to the laundromat - I could carry a week's worth of clothes and towels using a big backpack and a bag, and I would just bike over. I'd spend 1.5 hours reading and idly people-watching and then... [more]
favorited 1 time, recently by augustimagination
MeFi comment - 7 hours ago

This would be pretty cool in a sort of 1960s science fiction utopia setting - think of it, a future earth dotted with arcologies, interesting farming initiatives and artists, hermits and vacationers in their little dumpster houses. It is... [more]
favorited 15 times, recently by junques, eviemath, gentian, bile and syntax, maxwelton, FireballForever, mygothlaundry, drlith, MartinWisse, brand-gnu, kurosawa's pal, Fuzzy Monster, Salamander, seyirci, Rosie M. Banks
MeFi comment - 10 hours ago

I can see the argument that says, We don't want random dudes walking in here, claiming to be transgender and then scoping the women in back. People need to be real thoughtful about this line of reasoning. First, because I (generally read... [more]
favorited 34 times, recently by Sinadoxa
MeFi comment - 18 hours ago

As a person who struggles with being out to my parents*, your letter suggests that you may not quite be able to recognize where your girlfriend is as with her family, maybe because you have invested so much energy and thought into your own... [more]
favorited 26 times, recently by lovableiago, Uniformitarianism Now!, thetarium, macinchik, vickyverky, tinkletown, hush, barnone, miorita, wats, bakerina, vitabellosi, heathrowga, Blue Jello Elf, rtha, jbenben, thereemix, dialetheia, suedehead, redfoxtail, Kpele, Yesterday's camel, emilynoa, Don Pepino, Gray Skies, Ruthless Bunny
Ask MeFi comment - More than 18 hours ago

I took the road less traveled and...huh, it has had a lot of hidden benefits as well as unexpected bitterness. I don't have much money, I don't get any respect for my work, I could vanish from the world tomorrow and no one would notice. I am not an... [more]
favorited 28 times, recently by sculpin
Ask MeFi comment - Yesterday

I think you're imagining that a "normal" situation in a business is "everything is going perfectly because everyone is here 100%, fully trained, etc". Kind of like imagining that your "normal" commute should be twenty... [more]
favorited 10 times, recently by Amy NM
Ask MeFi comment - Yesterday

That linked "Homejoy" story is quite something. Walker sits at 13 out of D.C.’s 42 cleaners with a 4.6; almost all 5s, except for a woman who complained that he hadn’t gotten the mildew entirely out of her shower grout. Yes,... [more]
favorited 5 times, recently by papafrita, Wemmick, mygothlaundry, action man bow-tie, klangklangston
MeFi comment - Yesterday

What struck me - other than how incredibly resilient she is, and the fear that not everyone is as resilient - is her point about how much money people have to have to buy girls this way. You always think that the movie villain/SF-dystopia... [more]
favorited 35 times, recently by omegar, Jilder, magstheaxe, mordax, joboe, Corinth, scrump, communicator, RakDaddy, thereemix, tonycpsu, axon, Uniformitarianism Now!, Faint of Butt, litleozy, thetarium, everydayanewday, five fresh fish, Scram, ZeusHumms, fshgrl, theora55, EinAtlanta, guybrush_threepwood, Reverend John, Rosie M. Banks, haltingproblemsolved, maxwelton, angrycat, Ray Walston, Luck Dragon, oceanjesse, thylacinthine, Potomac Avenue, Caduceus, gingerest
MeFi comment - Yesterday

There is however a lot of innovation in tech for government, like Code for America, that Govtech Fund thing, etc. It'll help enormously if we can "disrupt" government bureaucracies, meaning employ fewer people administering them.... [more]
favorited 12 times, recently by Proofs and Refutations, wintermind, Sonny Jim, Lexica, daq, DoctorFedora, hydropsyche, 1066, context adventure, Vulgar Euphemism, threeants, TheWhiteSkull
MeFi comment - Yesterday

I mean, show me a muslimah who isn't as beautiful as a model and who maybe has glasses and likes to read and for some reason wants to date an atheist raised Lutheran, and I'm absolutely there. I feel like this article tries to compress too many... [more]
favorited 2 times, recently by virago
MeFi comment - 2 days ago

Does anybody use Tinder and think "why swipe 'yes' on someone who is way better looking than me"? If I were still dating dudes, I would absolutely have swiped yes for poor old Junior, on the theory that as a fat guy who likes fancy events,... [more]
favorited 5 times, recently by virago, carrioncomfort, Abehammerb Lincoln
MeFi comment - 2 days ago

It's really pushing it to be fifty-something and say you're Gen-X. Usually I see Gen-X as defined as born 1965ish to 1980ish. I had always thought that the defining factor was coming of age in some form during the 1980s. If you were born in 1960,... [more]
favorited 6 times, recently by threeants, lollymccatburglar, St. Sorryass, saulgoodman, philip-random, en forme de poire
MeFi comment - 2 days ago

(I am not a doctor or your doctor and can't provide a diagnosis. It's worth considering that someone can have both gender dysphoria and schizophrenia - your friend may be a trans woman or gender non-conforming in some way and also be struggling with... [more]
favorited 1 time, recently by jaguar
Ask MeFi comment - 2 days ago

I have avoided the SweeTango because it's called the SweeTango. I can deal with buying something called "Honeycrisp" but SweeTango is just embarrassing. Although the apple before the SweeTango was the "Zestar", which sounds like... [more]
favorited 8 times, recently by SailRos
MeFi comment - 2 days ago

It also occurs to me that most of the people I know who do that "oh, you!" little smack, or elbow someone to get them to stop telling off-color jokes or whatever - are women. And that the underlying issue is "a gentle poke can be... [more]
favorited 63 times, recently by vocpanda
Ask MeFi comment - 2 days ago

Well, the balloon sounds like an ill-conceived thing, it's true - but isn't the problem with these things the way they represent inequality rather than the things themselves? They're all wonderfully silly, of course, but they also have this... [more]
favorited 9 times, recently by stoneweaver, theony, Proofs and Refutations, amorphatist, Joe in Australia, adso, Gnatcho, aparrish, joseph conrad is fully awesome
MeFi comment - 2 days ago

I don't like it when someone asks me leading/pedagogical questions. If I ask "where's the THING?" and you respond like it's your job to help me deduce where the thing is, it feels very patronizing. If I ask you for information and... [more]
favorited 165 times, recently by Amy NM
Ask MeFi comment - 2 days ago

Here are some things I have observed: 1. It is possible to have a need for work, family and partner relationships which will fail. It is possible to seek out, over and over again, men (these are all men, right?) who will criticize... [more]
favorited 12 times, recently by shadowy_world
Ask MeFi comment - 2 days ago

I could totally throw a $200 dinner party without having it look particularly costly - good ingredients from the co-op, enough reasonable wine for a mid-sized group, good coffee for afters. I can remember spending north of $100 on a dinner party for... [more]
favorited 1 time, recently by Kitteh
MeFi comment - 2 days ago

Much as I dislike his work, I've still gotta give the guy props for getting fired from The Observer for shooting heroin on the Prime Minister's private jet. I would find that much more appealing if I hadn't had to deal with junkies shooting... [more]
favorited 6 times, recently by joseph conrad is fully awesome, morganw, clawsoon, Halloween Jack, philip-random, benito.strauss
MeFi comment - 2 days ago

I only really have experience with Red Lobsters - it's been many years since I've eaten at an Olive Garden - but I have several relatives who live in places where Red Lobster is the only non-fast-food restaurant option, and they like to go out to eat... [more]
favorited 1 time, recently by Snarl Furillo
MeFi comment - 2 days ago

(The thing is, as the middle class declines, being able to save up for a $500-$1000 "treat" twice a year becomes a rarer and rarer thing. Spur-of-the-moment international getaways? All that stuff? The only people I know who can really do... [more]
favorited 9 times, recently by Uniformitarianism Now!, spinifex23, Gnatcho, artemisia, gingerest, General Tonic, royalsong, dendrochronologizer, spacewaitress
MeFi comment - 2 days ago

I don't quite understand about these tiny New Statesman columns - they're clickbait and all, but it would be so easy to make a good rather than polemical and sure-to-be-ignored argument here. I can't imagine that Self hasn't read all those... [more]
favorited 3 times, recently by Phlegmco(tm), kandinski, Lesser Shrew
MeFi comment - 3 days ago

Also, many commenters in this thread seem not to know that as a writer Will Self is a well known provocateur and satirist. I've never cared that much for his books, honestly, but I would never take his writing at sort of naive face value.... [more]
favorited 2 times, recently by squinty, Halloween Jack
MeFi comment - 3 days ago

Man, nothing i love more than people who think a specific exception/possibility negates an entire class of lifestyle. Christ, what an epic exercise in missing the point/lacking empathy. I think the issue is that we're talking about a bunch... [more]
favorited 23 times, recently by icemill
MeFi comment - 3 days ago

They are. They are building a highly armed force to protect them and giving that force the freedom of action to suppress the poor. This is really important. I think it's easy to fall into a sort of Hunger-Games mentality, like... [more]
favorited 74 times, recently by bukvich, lord_wolf, jeffburdges, The Great Big Mulp
MeFi comment - 3 days ago

I really, really want to like Will Self, partly because as far as I can tell he looks almost exactly like Magneto, my very favorite mutant, and partly because his most recent novel really looks awfully interesting, and partly because going... [more]
favorited 3 times, recently by drjimmy11, Lesser Shrew, ZipRibbons
MeFi comment - 3 days ago

Do people gather in very large groups at restaurants, then? Except when I lived in the maybe 175-square-foot place, I don't think I've lived anywhere where I couldn't entertain three or four friends. Going to a restaurant does mean that... [more]
favorited 2 times, recently by Lemmy Caution, Kitteh
MeFi comment - 3 days ago

So the cultural kingdom is, once again, Brooklyn. Huh. I'll be sure to mention that next time it comes up. Admittedly, it would have had a lot of chuckle value in 1960, and will no doubt have some incredulity value in 2035.... [more]
favorited 2 times, recently by Monochrome, koeselitz
MeFi comment - 3 days ago

I think that this guy may have the wrong kinds of friends. I once was young and now am not so old, as the fellow says, and I can testify that it's perfectly possible to run around in snob bohemian circles while still doing things you... [more]
favorited 1 time, recently by Sangermaine
MeFi comment - 3 days ago

One of my dreams in life is to have enough time to spend in an area like this to "get in" with everyone, photograph them all, make a book and use the proceeds to help them. But I'm quiet and white and not very social, so all I'd wind up... [more]
favorited 221 times, recently by marsha56
MeFi comment - 4 days ago

If anything, the pernicious part is the mass idolization of extreme wealth and luxury. I used to look at Sea of Shoes, years ago, because they used to show some interesting vintage clothes and I looked at a lot more blogs then. The whole... [more]
favorited 29 times, recently by RobotLunch
MeFi comment - 4 days ago

(Just as a clarification - what makes the story strange to me is the robot head of Martine's wife and its sad weird interview straight out of New Wave SF, the transhumanism, Martine's apparent miraculous agelessness, the "transhumanism is... [more]
favorited 14 times, recently by Lexica, jaguar
MeFi comment - 4 days ago

That...is a story so strange that I actually googled Martine Rothblatt to be sure she exists. "A powerful trans" is not the happiest phrase to use. On another note: I suppose all these rich people want to live forever because they... [more]
favorited 12 times, recently by Lexica, jaguar
MeFi comment - 4 days ago

The same study I found actually did that. And one woman's response was quoted, and was something like, "okay, imagine a guy is a scoop of ice cream. One scoop is good....but two is better." Sometimes it's purely about two hot guys... [more]
favorited 5 times, recently by town of cats
MeFi comment - 5 days ago

Hi all. OP here. I am mortified that I posted this exaggerated, self-pitying version of what's going on. You're all so nice and caring, and sympathetic, but I am seriously having emotional regulation problems that are entirely my fault, and my... [more]
favorited 13 times, recently by haltingproblemsolved
Ask MeFi comment - 5 days ago

Don't go MTM. You don't have time, and honestly, unless you are applying to Oligarchs Are Us, it won't make a difference. Dink around with mail-order MTM later, or if you get the job, get on the roster of one of the Savile Row guys who visits the... [more]
favorited 2 times, recently by yellowcandy, Ruthless Bunny
Ask MeFi comment - 5 days ago

Oh my god, baijiu. I don't want it to have a western equivalent, because then I might once again face social pressure to drink it, and that stuff will knock you back. As much as I've often, often wished I was in a position to go back to work... [more]
favorited 9 times, recently by Ghidorah, flippant
MeFi comment - 5 days ago

Oh hey late-twenties Frowner! I tell you what, this time don't have a breakdown at 29, lose a year to depression and then have a slow, miserable climb back to functionality! No, seriously: 1. If you are having truly intrusive and painful... [more]
favorited 45 times
Ask MeFi comment - 6 days ago

If you're assuming that all characters on a show like Star Trek are straight because none of them are shown to be queer (let's assume shows with quite large casts that obviously aspire to represent wide swathes of humanity) then you're almost forced... [more]
favorited 3 times
MeFi comment - 6 days ago

What is really frustrating to me is the fact that our society has to spend umpteen squillion federal dollars running surveys and studies to establish that yes, people are traumatized when they see extreme violence even if they are black and poor... [more]
favorited 33 times
MeFi comment - 6 days ago

I also really like Fireside apples, introduced by the University of Minnesota in 1943. I have University of Minnesota headcannon where we are a stalwart, sincere, uptight and resolutely non-commercial land-grant institution dedicated to things... [more]
favorited 9 times
MeFi comment - 6 days ago

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