Activity from Frowner

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Wow, is this true? First Nation people are forced to live in reserves or certain urban neighborhoods? How is this enforced? In my neck of the American woods (and I live in a part of Minneapolis that is heavily Native), it's enforced on… [more]
favorited 9 times
MeFi comment - 10 days ago

I think that one has to do some very, very clever ideological footwork indeed to suggest that sex work is ipso facto worse than, eg, sweatshop labor, working as a part time nanny with insecure hours, being a hotel cleaner, etc. It often pays a lot… [more]
favorited 15 times
MeFi comment - 11 days ago

I was thinking about this thread earlier. I used - before I had any friends who did sex work - to feel that sex work was a particularly invasive kind of work, presented particular problems separate from routine misogyny, etc. I think what… [more]
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MeFi comment - 11 days ago

There are a couple of things that seem to turn up in answers to this type of question that bug me a little - 1. How much work should a relationship be? Honestly, I know a bunch of non-readers with whom, if we were the only queer/genderqueer… [more]
favorited 45 times
Ask MeFi comment - 12 days ago

A data point - we learned about Cesar Chavez in my extremely white, extremely conservative grade school in suburban Illinois. I remember it well - it was the first time I'd ever heard of the idea of a strike or a boycott or that picking crops might… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 12 days ago

Also someday Janelle Monae will be in this Hall of Fame, and maybe then I might conceivably be moved to visit. [more]
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MeFi comment - 13 days ago

Given that this seems to be a minority position among Orthodox people, it sounds like it has more to do with people's unacknowledged desire for power and cruelty than with religion, per se - it's pretty much on a par with wanting to tell the queers… [more]
favorited 109 times
MeFi comment - 13 days ago

We still don't induct a lot of women, do we? And the "one woman comes to town, one woman leaves town" bit with Houston and Raitt is pretty funny - it's not like we could imagine kicking out a dude in order to make space (even in… [more]
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MeFi comment - 13 days ago

Substantial body composition changes at the gym started for me with 30 minutes of elliptical-as-fast-as-I-can-sustain plus about 25 minutes of weights plus about 10 minutes of floor exercises four times a week. This has caused me to lose a little… [more]
favorited 9 times
Ask MeFi comment - 13 days ago

I cannot even begin to express the joy I get from pretending that vast swathes of history are just made up - were just made up wholesale by monks, even! It's an excellently SFnal backstory. Also, perhaps we could pick and choose - like, the Emperor… [more]
favorited 13 times
MeFi comment - 13 days ago

Is she drinking diet soda? I noticed an odd effect when I quit (which was hard! really hard!) - moderately sweet things taste a whole lot sweeter. So roasted sweet potato chunks might as well be pudding, and average grocery store peanut butter with… [more]
favorited 2 times
Ask MeFi comment - 14 days ago

These sweet potato biscuits? I recently made them with only 6T of fat, clabbered almond milk (1 T vinegar per cup of almond milk) and no added sugar, and they were still plenty sweet. They have been a total hit every time I make them. Also,… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 14 days ago

If your macbook is 13" or the itty one, what about the Billykirk leather satchel? It's not cheap but you can sometimes score them on eBay. I have had experience with their canvas messenger bags via eBay and they're nice. Or have you thought… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 14 days ago

There is now in this country in my lifetime a pro torture constituency. Well, really, the only reason we remember a time when this basically wasn't true is because The Evil Commie Empire tortured people and we used to define ourselves in… [more]
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MeFi comment - 14 days ago

Well, I mean, we don't have to assert that the unicorns have died out. I personally have never seen one, but then I have never been to France. [more]
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MeFi comment - 14 days ago

Can you suggest that she look around on the internet for other advice on this? I think that it's a tricky thing to negotiate, because there are several things in place - a generally misogynist culture which tells women that they are never… [more]
favorited 11 times
Ask MeFi comment - 14 days ago

I think it's important to be very precise when we talk about who wears what and why - that's part of what Graeber's essay suffers from, too many generalizations about very large stretches of clothing history and too many generalizations about gender… [more]
favorited 8 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

Also pavlovas, generally. I have always wanted to make things like Tarte Tatin and carmelized pineapple skillet cake, where you cook/carmelize the fruit in a skillet and then bake a cake on top and invert the whole thing, but I have never… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

I feel that this essay suffers from a personal dislike of ties and a total forgetting that queer people exist, plus a little bit of Not Quite Reading Enough Fashion History. At the same time, it's a funny provocation. It's very Baffler-y - they… [more]
favorited 8 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

(Also, dude, if you think that ties are bad - I have worn ties, and I have worn womanly office attire, and let me tell you - ties are absolutely nothing on what women have to wear. This is not an argument in favor of ties (although I… [more]
favorited 4 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

(Just as a point of clarification - I'm not strongly emotionally engaged with Getting People To Like David Graeber. He's an anarchist, I've read some of his essays that I really like, I found his memoir-ish stuff pretty interesting because it's… [more]
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MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

Smitten Kitchen Bakewell Tart. Lots of fun. I've made this both vegan and non-vegan, but the vegan version needs the (veganized) Martha Stewart marzipan recipe as the basis for the frangipane. I have made many apple frangipane tarts, some… [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

Oh nooooo. Oh. Oh, this is sad. Every time I read his work, I sort of think of him sitting there somewhere, being. His voice is so alive and present. No no no, I don't want him to be dead. [more]
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MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

David Cameron's faves include The Jam. Etc, etc, etc. Paul Weller did basically tell him to fuck right off, though. I was around for - but peripheral to - riot grrrl. I didn't go to any gatherings and only got to a few shows, so I… [more]
favorited 24 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

Ugh. I will believe in this nonsense when they start letting me star in a version of this where I have eight minutes to try to convince a cop to stop being a cop - because frankly, if there's one line of work that fucks people up but good, it's… [more]
favorited 40 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

What I'm noticing here is that your husband isn't hearing you, and that concerns me. He gets very angry, you're saying, when you talk about being unhappy. That doesn't sound so good. Also it sounds a bit like you're doing all the emotional work in… [more]
favorited 14 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

You should probably read this book before you go around accusing other people of being naive Yes, but - when "hippies" and "counterculture" are invoked in the popular press, they're not literally talking about the… [more]
favorited 25 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

I do not think so, because I live with two other extreme introverts. "Communal" does not have to mean "noisy and in everyone else's business", but the key feature is that everyone must have their own room; also, a group house… [more]
favorited 4 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

How would a mefi commune even work? Would there be a little whiteboard on everyone's doors for favorites? How would the mods handle derails? Would the mods have to, like, totally bulk up in order to be able to "delete" people from… [more]
favorited 6 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

But you implicitly are. You are and MartinWisse and gorbweaver and that Bruce Crumley piece Joe in Australia link to above are all engaging in blaming the victim and tacitly saying Charlie Hebdo deserved what they got. I would rather not… [more]
favorited 80 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

Is Charlie Hebdo actually left-wing? The sense I've always had is that there are elements of "left" in it and it's put together by people who were of the sixties/seventies left. But the left in France groups together a different… [more]
favorited 161 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

No, no - the original Amazon was located just off Loring Park on the edge of downtown. It did look like Madwimmin, and that part of town - eighties real estate contraction-era into the early nineties - was Pretty Queer. Ballet of the Dolls is still… [more]
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MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

Actually, one of the main changes in my personality that did not happen until my mid thirties - when I meet a dude who starts out being rude and patronizing, I do not assume he has hidden depths or a tragic past; I just assume he's a misogynist dick… [more]
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MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

entropicamericana, I own the original release of Personal Best, plus just about every queercore/homocore release I could find to buy between about 1993 and 2000. (If only I had a working record player right now!) The existence of… [more]
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MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

Although honestly the "and you can just cook all the tortillas" thing doesn't even come close to being excused by ignorance. "I am uncomfortable about being confronted by my own whiteness" - honestly, if you've grown up in a… [more]
favorited 10 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

This article is certainly charming, but also very weird, because in my world that's just how people live. I'm a bit odd because I am buying my house (extreme fixer-upper with holes in the walls, etc) and have only two housemates and one… [more]
favorited 2 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

Laurie Penny has a new book out. I own it but haven't read it. In general, I like her work. I feel like it's weird and potentially appropriative of cultural capital for me, a white person, to recommend books by women of color, but I also feel… [more]
favorited 11 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

Also - and importantly! - would we use real names? There are a number of people I know only by their activist noms de guerre from, like, an environmental campaign years and years ago, and a guy I see around town in a respectable capacity but know… [more]
favorited 1 time
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

I highly recommend reading the "grotesque Brooklyn clubhouse" link from the beginning of the article in the OP. It is positively science fictional - the scenario is sort of like if someone rewrote James Tiptree's "The Girl Who… [more]
favorited 2 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

there is some weird cultural stuff floating around the idea of Buying It For Life or all the Shop Class as Soulcraft Ya, you betcha. It's especially hilarious because while some people who buy all this stuff will keep it forever, a lot… [more]
favorited 12 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

Frowner that's really interesting, and the exact opposite of my experience in the UK where I was "too girly" for RG (I'm not massively girly). Shamed for wearing makeup, shamed for wearing "slutty" short skirts. I also remember… [more]
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MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

To my mind, the tricky thing is getting people who are committed to the arrangement. When it's family, that's relatively easy, but it can be trickier when it's a bunch of young-ish people at different career stages. And you don't want the kids… [more]
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MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

Yeah, and if it is—as it seems to be—a rather rare occurrence, the Times' breathless insistence on reporting this (as another episode, I guess, in the long-running serial Jews Behaving Badly) becomes yet another example of majority-group members… [more]
favorited 8 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

I have very mixed feelings about riot grrrl. Partly, yes, I am old; fashions of my late teens are now being worn by people in their late teens (and very nice they look, too) and so naturally I have this bias against my youth appearing in… [more]
favorited 2 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

To approach this from another angle: there's a well-intentioned but ill-thought-out trope in social justice oriented circles in which people who are members of a group (or share many characteristics with it - white cis gay dudes share a lot with… [more]
favorited 13 times
Ask MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

This whole discussion makes me think of something that we work to manage in a book discussion group I run - different ways of speaking "inside" and "outside" the story. The stated logic of Jane Eyre is that Rochester… [more]
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MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

I also feel like a lot of people - not people in this thread! - are interested in "rescuing" sex workers as long as they are young, pretty, cis straight women who can be cast as relatively "innocent" victims. Men, older sex… [more]
favorited 9 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

I mean, Mr. Rochester is actually an evil human being. He's racist, he slut-shames his poor first wife, he's manipulative, etc etc. Mr. Darcy is probably also racist and god knows where all his money comes from (Triangle Trade, probably),… [more]
favorited 5 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

I guess Colin Firth is a bit of an acquired taste. He does look very period-appropriate, though. Frankly, Mr. Darcy has to have a lot more in the cheekbones and big luminous eyes departments to make up for being...well, I think the problem with… [more]
favorited 2 times
MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

Mr Rochester is charming, yes, but consider the way he talks about all the local gentry at the party behind their backs, especially poor Blanche Whoosis, who he totally leads on. We're supposed to believe that she's a bad woman for wanting to… [more]
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MeFi comment - 2 weeks ago

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