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Still reading the FA but my first thought on reading the first paragraph was "so they hired a white dude to write a series on integration for Black History Month?". Maybe they could do something really radical like ask a black writer to… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

Hooray, you have a new place! This internet stranger remembers your other questions and is glad something is going better! One thing I've learned about people that is probably also true in NYC: they like things to be easy and comfortable, and… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

And to continue: I think it's really easy to feel that we're doing things because we're special snowflakes who make individual intelligent choices rather than because we're immersed in larger cultural currents. Every hipster is a hipster because… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

I am not totally down with your increasingly-self-beating-up comments in this thread, though. Not knowing what this was, I can't say just how justified all the rending is - maybe you did something super-epic where you cost this person… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

I don't think I would include so much science fiction or honestly, even any fiction. I suppose there are arguments which could make me change my mind, but cannot think of one. Its an interesting question. I absolutely adore science fiction… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

But seriously, this whole idea that "we" all need to be shaken out of "our" bourgeois state of ignorance and comfort really irritates me. Who has said this? The whole discourse of "art should [generically] 'push… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

This is just one of those things where okay, yes, I get that art should push boundaries, I think that probably everyone could adjust to it if they saw it day after day, I can see that it does interrogate some stuff about bodies we… [more]
favorited 12 times
MeFi comment - Last year

(I just want to add that your organization - or family, or friend group, or whomever - is letting you down by refusing to be responsible for the harm that they've done. Even if this is something like "my sister was getting married and… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Blergh. The Ender is Hitler thing has always bothered me a bit much. Card fabricates an innocent perpetrator of genocide. That perpetrator then discover that he committed unwitting genocides and spends the rest of his life trying to atone for it… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year


Okay, with this new information - I too have lived with an ex, and although our break-up had been initiated by me and we'd lived apart for several years, we both occasionally said and did kind of petty shit that was obviously about unresolved stuff… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

How many vegetarians are you expecting? And what kind of crowd is this - are they younger, older, etc? Are they paying more for the food or more for the experience? (A crowd which is thinking "I am going to go hang out with friends and… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

I guess everyone is traumatized by this story! [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Metafilter is amazing, and also that short story - which I was given to read in a gifted and taleted program when I was, like, eight - traumatized me for years. [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

All Summer In A Day, by Ray Bradbury, is the short story. [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

(I also want to point out that divined by radio grew up in an actual inner city situation and has some advice that is more concrete than mine...I was kind of writing my comment as a "from one white, introverted feeling-haver to another",… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

When we've been talking about race, shooters and violence, here's what I've been thinking: 1. That this is a horrific, tragic thing, first and foremost - and that whatever the survivors, their families and the families of the dead need should be… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

Looks like there was a TV episode of it which soft-pedaled the real ending, and that's probably what you saw. [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Is it that the dystopias are relatively easier to create, since so much of the world will look similar to what we've got around us now? Or is the dystopia more a method of ironic distance than a subgenre, really, a method adopted by multiple… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

They aren't treating you very well - they've condensed two real positions into one benefitless contract position, probably because they feel that they can walk all over you. This is the kind of thing that unions, for instance, forbid in our… [more]
favorited 12 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Here's a thing: I have a friend with a baby daughter. She's on food stamps. She can't afford childcare and does, basically, odd jobs while living with her [awful] parents because even with the odd jobs she can't make rent. She's out of food stamp… [more]
favorited 26 times
MeFi comment - Last year

...run out of profitable uses for the class of people who 500 years ago would have been known, without any derogation, as peasants. The condition of "peasants" has varied across history - 500 years ago was before the Enclosure… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

That is weird, as bedbug dogs require actual special bedbug training. (Here is a sort of "simplified to the point where it won't actually work" guide to the process.) I have had a bedbug dog visit my house. He worked with a special… [more]
favorited 13 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Generally speaking, she or he who does the breaking up usually feels a lot less bad than the other person. Plus you've already started the grieving process of losing him before you did the deed. Precisely! Honestly, when I've broken up with… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

What kind of apartment complex is this? Is it market rate/nice-and-pleasant or is it partially subsidized or really cheap or does it house people getting some form of state support? If it's a nice one, it seems less likely that there are going to… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

I have sold many things on eBay. I have issued refunds for various reasons. I do it through PayPal. You don't need to do anything fancy - you just use the initial transaction, and you can issue total or partial refunds easily. (I've chosen to give… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

People talk in academia, far more than in certain other professions. Joe Department Chair is going to go to conferences and exchange emails with other people with hiring power, and people really do have those "jesus god, I hate… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

The reality is that even though I genuinely do like her as a person, I’ve always thought her opinions and her veganism were ridiculous. I never respected them (which really means I never fully respected her), secretly harboring an opinion of her… [more]
favorited 41 times
MeFi comment - Last year

(And to continue - in general, the SF novels by women that they choose are focused on men. Frankenstein, The Dispossessed, Swordspoint - all novels by women where the most important characters are men and the focus is kept… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

+1 on the "there should be more women" tip I would have more patience with the absence of women on the painting list if the position of women on the writers' lists weren't so foolish-looking. At my count, for instance, 78 of the… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

I know 91% of words and was not fooled by any of the fake words. I am telling myself that I am still pretty good since the ones I missed were all science words and we all know that science doesn't count. [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

Yet if you talk about science fiction, about the best or most important, this needs to be in there, as that's the first novel that actually is science fiction, the start of it all. To include Frankenstein is a justifiable choice. The… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

Dawn, by Octavia Butler. It's very zeitgeisty with radicals right now, and I've lost count of how many people who, upon hearing that I read (and do a little teaching about) SF have told me "Oh, I don't really read science fiction....but… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

It has just occurred to me that asexuality is very much a product of modernity - you don't need to say that you are asexual unless 1. there's a very strong norm that everyone (married or not, seeking to have sex or not, religious or not, old or… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

I don't think it's sexist to want to acknowledge sexuality exists and can present issues when close proximity, intimacy, or touch are part of the work environment. For heterosexual people, which is the larger percent of the population, that… [more]
favorited 32 times
MeFi comment - Last year

It does not seem, in general, as if the editors spend very much time paying attention to cultural production by women - you have only to look at their other lists. If you are a Very Famous woman in your field (Virginia Woolf, Ursula Le Guin) you may… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

I also think that maybe fetishes and BDSM/etc sexual practices might be a good model for understanding asexuality - most people don't seem to have trouble with the idea that sexual fetishes (or identities such as submissiveness) are both highly… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

(Watch out for "heritage" brands like Frye and Fluevog - while both still make some great shoes, their salad days are behind them. Fluevogs used to be made in England, then Poland - and those were all very solid shoes. Now they're… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

White lie. Don't go. You are the one who has interacted with the violent men in your family, you are the one who is best qualified to judge whether they are dangerous or not. Too often, women are told to ignore danger signals because it's rude or… [more]
favorited 25 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

St. Peepsburg - who I'm sure is a perfectly lovely person! - is saying that because she feels that someone's motives for calling themselves asexual are mixed, this calls their asexuality into question. That line of reasoning only makes sense… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

This brings back something for me: a long time ago, I lived in a house next door to a place there was a murder. One of my housemates was a young black woman. She saw most of the murder - not the critical moment, but she saw the quarrel through a… [more]
favorited 138 times
MeFi comment - Last year

I find myself wondering how the school defines "bullying", especially since I've seen a lot of places use it to mean "any form of unkindness directed at another child" rather than (as most mefites use it) "sustained,… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

Yeah, in important ways my taste was set in the nineties, although it was much more "aspirational J Crew like all the rich girls wore in HS" plus various punk and grunge stylings from college. (I'm old!) In high school I had neither… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

What, do the xx's stand for something dirty? Back in my particular day, they stood for straight-edge. But that's not a nineties thing, it's an eighties thing that carried over. [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

I think you are way overthinking this. It's difficult to negotiate friendships sometimes, but most minor awkwardnesses can be solved by just being as sincere and kind as possible. I think that it's very easy to get into "rules" and… [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

your ideal image is closer to a Victorian gentleman with a study of books made of oak, filled with comfortable chairs and a fireplace whom can discuss nearly any subject with some familiarity. See, that Victorian gentleman was at… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

It blows my mind (actually I guess it makes sense) that so many of you have seen, but completely misunderstood, Ghost World. Enid and Seymour are the only sane, decent people in a misanthropic world otherwise populated entirely by severely hollow,… [more]
favorited 13 times
MeFi comment - Last year

I saw a lot of young people my age arrive, flip out, and leave. Personally, I don't think I thrived those first few years. I didn't make the most of the situation. But I was young. I wanted to par-tay. I'm totally going to disagree with you… [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

Okay, back again. I have a lot of thoughts about this: 1. How you are feeling is not about you. It's about the messages of woman-hating and woman-shaming that you have received all your life. You have picked up the messages that society… [more]
favorited 32 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

I RTFA, and the thing that jumped out at me was the passage where the writer spoke of a woman who was interviewing for a secretarial position at the salon chain she worked for, so she could move up from being a hairdresser. When she left, the… [more]
favorited 65 times
MeFi comment - Last year

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