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Activity from Frowner

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(Also, most of the kids I know mostly wear hand-me-downs or thrift store stuff or presents - it's actually cheaper to be able to use a wider variety of hand-me-downs rather than a gender-restricted sort. You don't need "two... [more]
favorited 1 time
MeFi comment - Last year

You should read some queer femme tumblrs! I am a butch queer person of indeterminate gender who isn't really attracted to femme women and reading a lot of those totally changed my feelings about bodies and femme presentation. Sadly, I... [more]
favorited 27 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

And dentists, come to think of it! You could improve the lives of MANY homeless people by staffing a free, full-service dental clinic....but of course, if we started giving free and desperately needed care to homeless people, it would be... [more]
favorited 4 times
MeFi comment - Last year

I'm torn because while I feel homeless people probably have the right to beg, makes signs, loiter downtown etc., it really kills urban centers. Directly or indirectly the homeless have been used to justify the nonexistence of benches, closure of... [more]
favorited 28 times
MeFi comment - Last year

The thing is, the state/the collective has to take the burden off the individual in terms of being exhausted and frightened by panhandlers - and I do believe that it can be exhausting and I know it can be frightening. What happens now is that... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

I am uneasy with the "give money to social services, not the homeless" line, for several reasons: first, because I suspect that it results in less giving, because it's easy to think "oh, I will give at X point and not now to... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

In the case of "fairest of them all the word fair means beautiful or handsome. It doesn't refer to coloring at all. Here is an article from The Beheld about the origins of "fair" - apparently it originally meant... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

On women and degrees: (Background comment - all of this "school isn't friendly for boys because boys are inherently THING" is pretty silly - girls were "inherently" unfit for education for quite a while because their wombs... [more]
favorited 23 times
MeFi comment - Last year

Things have changed, I find men that insist on making me wait for them to run to the door first or make a big show of holding the door when it was really my turn, to be rude. Just treat people as people, not genders, and do the act/accept the act... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

"Shyster", right? I do not want to google it at work, but IIRC it's either actually anti-semitic or anti-semitic as used by gentiles. [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

One thing I always notice in these threads - the way it's so easy to identify yourself with your suffering, or to identify with your abuser/the system that abused you. This is something I have struggled with a lot myself in terms of... [more]
favorited 95 times
MeFi comment - Last year

No seriously, if you honestly think that it's only us modern capitalist industrial folks who are judgy towards our elders/youngers, you really need to read more. No, no, there's actually some pretty good research on the concept of... [more]
favorited 10 times
MeFi comment - Last year

I just want to pop back in to say that I don't really worry about 'being attractive' any more. Partly because I'm older and 'being attractive' in your late thirties is different than in your twenties, partly because I'm a fat butch... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

(A digression in case you are worrying about age and marriage instead of just age and still-not-being-grown-up: the issue isn't when most American women marry, it's when people in your social circle, people of your general background and... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

The Anaheim city government has been surprisingly responsive to the people here. Rather than circling the wagons and undertaking an "internal investigation", the mayor has reached out to the FBI and US Attorney's office to launch an... [more]
favorited 31 times
MeFi comment - Last year

My experience of being young and sorta plain* and female was this: guys who hit on me on the street thought I was easy. They were offering to "buy me a drink" in the hope that I would go to a bar with them and then have sex. This was... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

I am just so tired of people doing this "you and your sad pathetic life, you don't know what you're missing because..... on morally insignificant choices. Okay, in looking back mere moments later that was a really mean way to say... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

At the same time, this would never be okay if a white person did the same thing. No matter how many black people ever mistreated a white person during the course of his life, he would never, never, be okay saying something like that.... [more]
favorited 9 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

I think that those of us who are white Americans in this thread have the tricky issue of, well, the whole thing is happening in Japan....and it's not like there isn't a great deal of racial overdetermination in our understanding... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

I think it's worth looking at the comments at Clutch - it's a site with some fairly sophisticated analysis of style and race, and IMwhiteO the commentariat is also pretty sophisticated. Folks' feelings seem to be complicated, a lot more complicated... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

So, is internalized racism not a thing now? You don't think that French-North African kids might be responding cheekily to the racism they receive from mainstream French culture and that the mode of resistance they choose (adoption of imported,... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

Tofu and breast cancer: Here is a PubMed link to one of the studies I've seen. I've seen a bunch of other similar ones but don't have time to google around for them - this one is pretty characteristic. Here is a crappy Dr. Weil link that... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

OK, so I don't want to make this a thing or keep talking about it because it makes everyone feel bad, but I just want to be clear that you are responding to the one thing I specifically said was not the thing I was talking about. That is all.... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

There is a 20 point gap in breastfeeding rates between mothers with a High School Diploma or less and mothers with an Undergraduate degree. There is a 30 point in between mothers 30+ and 20 years of age. African-Americans breastfeed at a... [more]
favorited 24 times
MeFi comment - Last year

What I hear from these internets is that Housman's in London has hosted book discussion groups. I am in Minneapolis, though, so I have no idea if that's true. I know that Richard Seymour, author of American Insurgents, has given... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Women's bodies are always regulated as part of a nationalist impulse. I'd argue that the obese body is implicitly "feminized" in popular discourse and regulated in the same way. Women and feminized people can't be trusted with their... [more]
favorited 23 times
MeFi comment - Last year

Er – did you notice that that study says that eating tofu seems to prevent breast cancer? Okay, we are talking totally at cross purposes here. The point I was trying to make was precisely that tofu seems to prevent breast... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

See, fun's fun and all, but as a female-type person I get really tired of left-wing dudes (Self, Tim Wise, Derek Jensen...to name a few) whose automatic way of symbolizing what is wrong with the world is to point to a weirdly sexualized image of a... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

I hope the above will be taken for what it is: a lightly poeticised account of the mental state of an average young woman negotiating her way through the urban environment There is a certain type of man...often he writes for Adbusters, but... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

Racialicious True Blood roundtable. Caution: they are not always superfans. [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

I don't think "hipster is about appropriation" is sufficient - while there are certainly people wearing "Indian" costumes to house parties while drinking Pabst, there are plenty of culturally-appropriating groups (New Age folks... [more]
favorited 55 times
MeFi comment - Last year

I agree with The AV Club on why it's time to stop using white as a pejorative. Just as a clarifying comment again (this stuff is pretty tricky to discuss online among strangers, I find): I feel like there's a difference between 1.... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Okay, I'm just gonna threadsit here: if folks want to talk about cultural appropriation as a thing itself, let's make a post for the blue! There's lots of stuff that could be linked. Right now, just assume that my belief is that cultural... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

White person here! But, um, white person who has a lot of experience of the culture you're talking about? And worries a lot about the way it works and the whiteness angle? And has their own issues vis-a-vis queerness and... [more]
favorited 8 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

And it is "trends" like this that make me never, ever want to have sex again. When I get past the depression about how I'm inadequate, I'm just filled with rage that the world really, seriously expects me to spend all this precious time... [more]
favorited 9 times
MeFi comment - Last year

(Just to clarify - I didn't mean to imply that people of color are all creepily, magically, movie-stereotype caring (although I think it's reasonable to read my comment that way and I apologize) - I was thinking specifically of an... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

I thought the part about how you "resent" us for things that I didn't see anyone saying here, and the things that we "bang on about" that nobody said here either, were meant to convey rage, but I apologize if I misread that.... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

She's still breastfeeding her 3 year-old. I know someone who breastfed her kid until he was, uh, I dunno, three-ish? Older than three? I know a lot of people who do all that new age parenting stuff. The lesson for me has been that... [more]
favorited 21 times
MeFi comment - Last year

Back before fans and air conditioning, I have it on reliable evidence from my father (who actually was just poor), people sweltered. And slept badly. People also slept outdoors - there was a whole culture of sleeping on the roof or in the... [more]
favorited 10 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

That last interval is 5 years?! Looks like the fellas hit a bit of a rough patch ... yikes. I am not looking forward to 50... Well, the light in the last photo is falling really differently and casts a lot more shadows/deepens lines.... [more]
favorited 1 time
MeFi comment - Last year

Have you asked her what she wants from you about this? Is it something that she is really ready to talk about? Does she have good friends who are masculine-of-center (that seems to be the hipster catchall term right now)? Or good male... [more]
favorited 12 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

But, like, Twilight is full of really fucked-up, abusive relationships. So, fer cryin' out loud, is every Orson Scott Card book, not that those are porn but they are really creepy about sexuality. In fact, I'd infinitely rather someone... [more]
favorited 14 times
MeFi comment - Last year

I think that anyone who thinks this is weird is spending way too much time with the interior decorating magazines. The idea that each room should be painted a separate and noticeable color is very, very recent - when I was growing up, it was typical... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Now there is an article that could jinx a life - talking about how you're in love with some famous musician fellow and what it's like being with the band, that's practically a guarantee that the guy is seeing some European music journalist on... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

By the same token, you could say that destitute young women are currently economically "coerced" into having children, because of income assistance available to mothers. It's counterintuitive, but if we paid young women as much to not be... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

Oh god, you HAVE to read the Mina De Malfois stories. They aren't fan fiction, they're a bunch of stories about people who write fan fiction and the various subgenres therein. They start out as stand-alone stories making fun of a specific... [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

Also, Frowner, just because women see making their own decisions about hygiene, dress, and gender presentation without taking into account anyone else's opinions, wishes, or feelings, as being feminist (because how dare a woman just do what she... [more]
favorited 2 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

What I notice looking at pictures of these is that the softness of the fabric means that the fit is a little off, the legs look a little baggy, etc. The fit looks kind of nineties to me - not the way jeans are conventionally worn right now. For... [more]
favorited 16 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

(Also, "rage"? Really? We're disagreeing on the internet and that's rage. If we want to unpack how women are expected to behave, I find it interesting that it seems natural to be told not to express anything that even hints at anger.)... [more]
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MeFi comment - Two years ago

I guess what I'd tend to say is that there are crushes and crushes. I'm queer, mostly date non-cis-men and have at one point or another had teeny-tiny crushes on most of my friends, but more in the "oooh, I have a crush on the cute bus... [more]
favorited 8 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

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