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Activity from Frowner

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As a sidelight on the whole thing: mere moments ago I was looking at one of the snobbish shoe blogs that I sometimes look at and found this gem of rhetoric: "...all Saint Crispin’s shoes are handcrafted by a small team of artisans, craftsmen... [more]
favorited 1 time
MeFi comment - Last year

Now, I know that this is not men's styleblog orthodoxy, but I like J Crew's men's shirts. The fabrics tend to be soft and comfortable and I like their patterns. Sure it's no J Press or fancy Italian maker, but there you go.... [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

(Oh, I just want to add that it is very easy to get worked up over injustices that seem new and strange and startling while letting pass the ones that are routine and familiar, even if those are worse. Like, is it worse to airbrush women out... [more]
favorited 19 times
MeFi comment - Last year

Initially: "Susan, I'm happy with the way I look. When you suggest that I need to change, it makes me feel undermined and frustrated. Please stop giving me suggestions about my appearance." And then change the topic when they continue.... [more]
favorited 23 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Last week I happened across The View while channel flipping and they had Gabby Douglas on with a backdrop of her doing a mid air splits leap on the balance beam (Totally safe for work). They blurred out her crotch like it was Japanese porn or... [more]
favorited 6 times
MeFi comment - Last year

Split the costs! Remember that fights and resentment over money are really destructive to relationships - in the long run, even if you save a couple of hundred dollars it won't be worth it. (I mean, unless this is an extremely casual FWB-style thing,... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

So wait, what, Ikea 'fessed up and it was actually them apparently assuming that the Saudis just couldn't handle a regular Ikea catelogue and not the actual Saudi franchisee at all? So does this boil down to "Westerners in advertising... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

Replace "women" with "Black people" and no one would think this was culturally acceptable or a subject we enlightened Western folks shouldn't discuss. And expecting Arabic women to have fully developed ideas of what freedoms... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

Oh, gosh, that sounds almost exactly like my history of sort-of-around-the-hip problems. IANYD and I recognize that words are imperfect and we may sound like we're describing the same thing but we're not. Here is what happened to... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Oh, dude, your update makes it sound just like mine - that's exactly how mine feels. I don't think it's sciatica either. I think sciatica-like treatment makes some sense, though - stretches, core exercises. (Piriformis stuff is related to... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Why not give cash and a small but special present, if that's how you feel? When I've received objects as gifts, I've often been more delighted by a small, relatively inexpensive yet appealingly fancy thing than by a big thing anyway - a gift... [more]
favorited 14 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

That? That is a chin-length bob with a deep side part, no bangs, no layering except a little bit at the ends. I would not mention "bangs" except to say that you do not want them, as this will only confuse the issue - I grew up in... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Actually, you're probably already doing this, but if you're not: read a bunch of men's style blogs over a few months. I'm in a rush so I won't link, but I like Down East And Out (reblogs a lot of great images); An Affordable Wardrobe (thrifted... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

I think that it depends very much on what impression you aim to give. Do you want to look traditional yet memorable? Do you want to look like new money? Do you want to look like you follow the couture? Do you want to look like you wish it was 1940?... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

All of this is rather difficult to figure since we don't really know what your style is. Glasses-wise, I wear Shurons or Anglo-Americans, which are nice without being especially memorable. But if you're looking for unusual frames...well, I'd really... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Yes, rap is a skill as complex as playing rock music - maybe even more. I'm no expert in this but I can speak as someone who did not "get" rap or hip-hop for most of their life. What changed my mind were these things: 1. Honestly, an... [more]
favorited 34 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

If it's sort of dry and thick with a rounded shell, it might be what I grew up calling an "isopod" but which was actually some kind of pillbug or woodlouse, often found in damp places. (I mean, they are isopods, but so are a lot of... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

I don't know - I happen to have spent a good deal of time around a group of lower-income kids whose parents have less education. I've watched those kids play computer games and play regular games. I'm familiar enough with the group to say that some... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

(Aw, thank you windykites!) If your friend is really sincere and just ignorant, maybe he would like to read some books? Can't Stop Won't Stop is supposed to be very good - it's about hip-hop generally. I also remember hearing good things... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Boy, I remember back in the Downsize This! era (otherwise known as what we used to think of as 'hard times')..."Clinton's created a LOT of new jobs, Joe." "Yeah, I have three of them.... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

James Herriot's All Creatures Great And Small and the other books in that series. They are so comforting that even I, a gloomy atheist anarchist, find them pretty cute. The guy was a country vet in England during the late thirties, served... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

I think reducing feminism to "choice" is an oversimplification. It relies on the idea that we all arrive in the world as robotic rational actors who never change, who always have perfect information and equal access to resources, etc etc.... [more]
favorited 32 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Gosh, we're all old. When did that happen? I mean, I'm younger than those guys, but they were the sort of Established But Young set when I was in college. The Death of Speedy is one of the best graphic novels ever. And the one all... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

I would not give cash. I feel like cash is a gift that you give either when it's traditional, it's been specifically requested or when the giftee has fewer financial/social resources than the giver. My parents gave me cash for my birthday when I... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Okay, mefi rote answer - have you thought about therapy? It's got to be pretty traumatic growing up in a family driven out of their country by violence, even if that was in your grandparents' generation, and it's obviously affecting you out of all... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Also, you might find it reassuring to read some histories of indigenous resistance movements or radical activism in Latin and South America. I'd say those are far better parallels with the US, or far better aspirations for US radicals - and even... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Send her an email that says "Don't beat yourself up about it - it's fixed now and I'm not worrying about it. Cheers, Lesli212" Keep it VERY short. That will reassure her if she's sincerely seeking reassurance but not feed into anything.... [more]
favorited 15 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

I feel your pain! I hate talking to strangers and when I go to the farmers' market I often end up with either nothing or twenty pounds of vegetables that go bad before I cook them. Here are some thoughts: 1. Get some 'snack' vegetables like... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Last year

I think it's important to remember that both men and women are socialized into how we/they experience sexual desire. I mean, the way you describe sexuality seems completely normal - as in reasonably common - but also the product of gendered... [more]
favorited 12 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Back off! You can, however, be friends in the long run. Reduce your contact either by explicitly telling the guy that you need to step it back because you have feelings for him or just by saying that you're really busy and being less available.... [more]
favorited 6 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

So what I'm seeing in these articles is this: 1. From the mainstream perspective, it's bad if terrorists destroy something for political goals but perfectly acceptable/inevitable for capitalism to destroy something to make money for rich people.... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

I think there's a little bit of truth in this, but I also think that Tolkien is less of an innovator in that regard than we now tend to think. Wagner is an obvious precursor (heck, it's even a giant mythic saga about a magical ring of power!).... [more]
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MeFi comment - Two years ago

I think that Frowner is right that his behavior doesn't necessarily indicate that he is consciously manipulating you, actually enjoying having two women "fight over him," etc. However, I think that Frowner's conclusion--Emotional affairs... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

Of course, this was complicated for me by the fact that my dad was buds with the Hildebrandt brothers. He posed for a bunch of Tolkien calendars (that's him at the center of An Unexpected Party) and so our house was littered with Hildebrandt... [more]
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MeFi comment - Two years ago

You'll be ready to be friends, perversely enough, when you don't find yourself strongly wanting to communicate with him on a regular basis. You'll think of him and have pleasant but not especially strong feelings. You'll think... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

Skygazer, I suspect that what you want is the Dehner tank boot--scroll down past the suede one. I had forgotten how sweet these look. [more]
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MeFi comment - Two years ago

You think the seventies in Britain were a fun time to be trying to get a job? Go read some history. If my memory serves me well, you also rioted, organized, had a bunch of strikes and had a goddamn labor government. Plus the dole!... [more]
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MeFi comment - Two years ago

You know, it's quite possible that Sara has some OCD-type issues, or some intense anxiety. (I say this as someone who used to get incredibly, agonizingly upset and freaked out if I committed a minor social faux pas - as it appears that she did (you... [more]
favorited 8 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

These shoes have glued soles, soles that have been worn through. A cobbler isn't going to be able to "replace the soles" the conventional way. A stitched shoe has a multi-layer sole - one layer which is stitched to the shoe and other... [more]
favorited 4 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

I have no idea what this has to do with white people or middle class people or thrill seekers. This seems to be about one company, Vice, promoting another company's, Bethesda, product in a tacky way. It has to do with what I, a white middle... [more]
favorited 15 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

Well-meaning friends seem to get convinced that the "problem" is that you just don't know where the dresses are sold See, a whole lot of the "you just need to take her shopping and show her how cute lacy underwires can really... [more]
favorited 18 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

I may just be a confused American, but what I've looked at online does seem to be on aesthetics - are these aesthetics not choice-based? Here, at least, even the underclass or lower working class (through thrift shops and other such things) have... [more]
favorited 63 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

The money/scanner thing sounds a bit like a hyperfocus/absentminded situation - it seems weirdly familiar to me, actually. I've had those moments. Once, I was at work at an old job on Halloween, passed a woman wearing really realistic cat ears and... [more]
favorited 12 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

Just when you think that safe, secure, middle class, thrill-seeking, mostly-but-not-exclusively white people have plumbed the depths of self-centering tackiness and lack of empathy, they go and prove you wrong yet again. Oh well, at least this... [more]
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MeFi comment - Two years ago

I guess for me the most practical concern is that if you use dated, racialized language you're going to create the impression among a significant number of people that you're clueless and have no gift for language. And that's going to get in... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

Here is what I would do: 1. Go through the house and note all the big/obviously high-dollar items. Set a limit for "high dollar" - say, things that will net at least $50 when you sell them. Look at older/vintage clothes too,... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

Ask yourself why you're worried about this - I mean, it doesn't sound like he's given any indication that he's looking to leave you or unhappy with your relationship, so why are you worrying? (If you weren't worried, you wouldn't be wondering - it... [more]
favorited 9 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

I don't care if you're young, old, rich, poor, black, white, man, woman, etc....but at some level I expect people in the working world to dress professionally. See, this is something else that I don't quite follow. In my experience, most... [more]
favorited 11 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

People who are not in the UK might find Owen Jones's (formerly writing as Owen Hatherley) book Chavs to be of interest. It's extremely accessible and gives a lot of case-study stuff about how UK elites mobilize the concept of "chav" as a... [more]
favorited 10 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

Okay, what I'm hearing here is that you don't feel like you're getting enough good time with your boyfriend. So my first question would be "how much time do you want to spend together?" Also, what kind of time do you spend together as a... [more]
favorited 12 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

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