Activity from Frowner

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But who is going to work all these delivery jobs, boxing up our razor blades for same day delivery and so on? They are going to be making shit wages under very precarious conditions with probably almost no ability to predict which days they'll be... [more]
favorited 5 times
MeFi comment - Last year

I cannot guarantee that it is anxiety, but I will say that as someone who has had periods of intense anxiety, I have caused myself symptoms like this. I have had all kinds of lumps in my throat and difficulty swallowing, for example, plus... [more]
favorited 3 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Oh, I wanted to say two more things: 1. The bout of twitching that I referenced earlier took a while to die away, even after I had become convinced that it was benign and taken steps to address my anxiety. Even now, I occasionally get bouts of... [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Oh, I add that if someone says, "But I don't know how to hook up the projector either!" or "I'm sorry, the Dean just asked me to go to this meeting so I have to run", I am perfectly happy to respond with "I'll call the IT... [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

It's a fundamentally better model if you want your neighborhoods to be desolate crime-ridden wastelands full of shuttered shops. So everyone who works retail (itself not that awesome a job) will either be totally jobless and destitute or... [more]
favorited 2 times
MeFi comment - Last year

Minnesota liberalism was, I think, always pretty much skin deep. What finally tore away the facade? I think it was 9/11, more than racism. (Minnesota has been racist for a very long time; many Minneapolitans once proudly considered the city to be... [more]
favorited 13 times
MeFi comment - Last year

In the 'realities of being a Hungarian Roma in Canada" article, they point out that the generous, lavish benefits that people are allegedly emigrating to scam off the Canadian government are something like $1100 a month, out of which you have to... [more]
favorited 7 times
MeFi comment - Last year

Oh, another thing: I've found that when interacting with younger guys (I'm a queer person who occasionally dates guys, so my situation is different from yours) that very often they want a close, supportive, non-sexual relationship with an... [more]
favorited 16 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

a.) A mentor b.) A friend c.) Not in their age group Yes, this! By happy coincidence, I too am in my thirties and spend a lot of time in a [political] scene that skews young and where I tend to take on a lot of certain kinds of... [more]
favorited 17 times
Ask MeFi comment - Last year

Use whatever words you like, but I think it's disingenuous to imply that people who avoid a word are doing it because we/they have a problem pointing out anyone's failings. Now, I am perfectly willing to believe that here on Metafilter,... [more]
favorited 2 times
MetaTalk comment - Last year

Yeah, Frowner, that's pretty weak. The "cracker isn't nearly as insulting as other words" thing is probably a valid argument. "It's okay to insult white people because white people are awful" is bullshit and terrible.... [more]
favorited 1 time
MetaTalk comment - Last year

That's the exact excuse racists use for using "n****r". Yes, and some people say that the earth was created 4,000 years ago while the rest of us assert that it wasn't; some people say that men are the real victims of feminism; et... [more]
favorited 1 time
MetaTalk comment - Last year

If the actual MOOC-ification of higher ed is likely to be a dead-end, in other words, MOOC’s do enable us to ask a question that we’ve often been too defensively crouched to think about: what should or could “higher education” look like, if it... [more]
favorited 23 times
MeFi comment - Last year

I'm sort of sick of the trope that dorks are particularly misogynist. I think it's a sort of 'just world' fallacy. Women don't typically like dorks and lots of dorks are lonely so it must be their fault for being bad people. I'm not saying dorks... [more]
favorited 34 times
MeFi comment - Last year

It is not required to back up your personal opinion with any sort of evidence. But it helps. Huh. Well, although I'm an adult now, I don't think I have an actually lower tolerance for lousy working conditions than I did when I was... [more]
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MeFi comment - Last year

Also, these fortress schools weren't built -as the linked article misleadingly says - to protect students from riots; they were built to control students and keep them from rioting, so students were figured as potential rioters first and... [more]
favorited 1 time
MeFi comment - Last year

Like, I could see conceding that I'd like to have sex with my female friends in the abstract, and sure, it'd be an ego boost to think that they're all one hot second away from jumping my bones Also, I submit that since the social cost to... [more]
favorited 26 times
MeFi comment - Last year

I always wondered how much of the mockery actually had to do with his ethnicity, actually. I mean, I've watched a lot of these horrible, horrible situations play out on the internet and it seems like the victim is very often someone who is already... [more]
favorited 11 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

It's called The Saturdays. I had a copy. [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

When people have made "jokes" that aren't funny to me, I've talked to them - usually pretty gently, since if someone I like, who is basically a good person and who I know does not want to hurt me, made a remark in poor taste, my assumption... [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

When I was really, really depressed in my twenties, I read a bunch of YA novels by Diana Wynne Jones (they are older, so they're more original and more geared to teens than contemporary YA). These are all light and charming fantasy: Howl's... [more]
favorited 4 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

I'm often really surprised that some white people don't have non-white friends. I'm Indian, and I have a very diverse group of friends from all over the country and the world. I went to an elite college in a boondock-y place and I live in DC now.... [more]
favorited 5 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

Why is Girls a focal point for criticism about under-representation of people of color on television? Arrested Development didn't have any significant non-white characters* but it was never called out like Girls. Tons of shows could be criticized... [more]
favorited 3 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

Rather than focusing on compromise (since why bother attempting to compromise with somebody who thinks I'm horrible?), my analytical mind instead starts searching for ways to take them down if they get in my way, and it's difficult to mentally... [more]
favorited 16 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

What about bleach? Either bleaching them as one might bleach whites (and of course in the washing machine) or just adding a little bit to kill germs as you might if you were cleaning up in a food service environment? Or is that deprecated now and... [more]
favorited 2 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

1. Brushing is what you do to get ordinary day-to-day dirt off the shoes. Supplement with a damp cloth if there's serious mud/grit/salt. Keep the brush and the shoe trees where you take your shoes off when you come in, or you can easily get lazy... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

Did you not think that's how it was handled in Season 2, episode 2? How you characterize the breakup scene? See, I actually think that if the show carries on in that vein instead of letting everyone off the hook or pulling a "nothing... [more]
favorited 2 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

Hold the phone, OP - libertarian seasteading projects did not inspire The Scar. (I mean, unless Mieville directly says that they did...but The Scar came out in summer 2002, and thus was planned and written well before this seasteading... [more]
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MeFi comment - Two years ago

"Why, what a strange question." [crickets] Also Miss Manners-approved. [more]
favorited 20 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

Wait, hold the phone...you're saying that your brother, who is a POC child of immigrants, was suspended for three days for saying something like "those crackers in Neighborhood X would probably flip out and say [inappropriate thing] if we went... [more]
favorited 32 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

Part of becoming a therapist is to realize that stuff like this will happen. In fact, in lots of situations, the therapist will ask you how you would like to handle it if you meet them in public - do you want to pretend you don't know them?... [more]
favorited 4 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

I'd suggest asking her what she needs to make this right - on the one hand, it's only a drawer; on the other hand, the broken drawer really impacts the value of the whole bed. Can she replace the drawer via the manufacturer? Can a local... [more]
favorited 2 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

It sounds like a first step would be to actually meet her - or actually, your first first step would be to talk to the person who met her and find out why they invited her to stay and what they know about her. It's possible that this... [more]
favorited 13 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

Oh, holy crap, don't give her money. [more]
favorited 27 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

You know, it's funny - I actually took a good look at my first 2013 pay statement and, unlike this whole WSJ line of nonsense suggests, it's neither painful nor confusing. Because I am not a plutocrat, I make a modest amount; my taxes have gone up... [more]
favorited 5 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

I'd be interested in hearing how the "Planned Parenthood is a plot to bring on the eugenics of the Blacks" 'theory about a conspiracy' fits into the meme of 'conspiracy theories are all about white privilege' The people funding... [more]
favorited 3 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

It's interesting too just how many physical cues there are. It's not just "tits/no-tits" or "beard/no-beard." It's really subtle stuff like the distribution of fat on a person's face and neck, or the structure of their jaw and... [more]
favorited 9 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

The Wired article (after talking about how Graph search leverages one's "relationship with brands", god why are people such suckers on the internet, you do not have relationships with brands) talks about how this can be used in... [more]
favorited 1 time
MeFi comment - Two years ago

I think you've just given yourself away as living in Minneapolis. I don't think Chicago suburbs have rings. Yes they do! What do you call Oak Park then? (Which is not where I grew up.) "Inner ring suburbs" are the first couple... [more]
favorited 1 time
MeFi comment - Two years ago

Minnesotans couldn't imagine moving away from family/support networks to live somewhere new. See, I actually moved to Minnesota and stayed - voluntarily! - and the "Minnesota" that gets described in these articles is never... [more]
favorited 10 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

Can you check in with another faculty member or your department head to get guidelines for how to respond? Particularly if you don't have tenure/are adjuncting or are in some other way vulnerable (visibly GLBTQ? Person of color in a majority white... [more]
favorited 1 time
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

Well, yes, but on the other hand Minnesota is something like 87% white. When you're almost 90% white it's not a big surprise when the popular view of your area is that it is lily-white. 'Cause it mostly is. I think you misunderstand me. The... [more]
favorited 3 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

It sounds like you're anxious about your son's gender expression and/or sexuality, and you're concerned that his concerns are making him secretly depressed or ill-at-ease in the world and that's impacting his social life. Vis-a-vis the dolls... [more]
favorited 26 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

It includes MPR. It's like 'real' Minnesotans are descended from Swedes (which I think isn't even true of the majority of Minnesotans descended from that wave of immigrants) and everyone else is a unicorn, regardless of how long their family has... [more]
favorited 4 times
MeFi comment - Two years ago

Using My Words, as Captain Awkward would say, and telling people that I'm happy to talk about it, but I need a bit of time to process and/or don't quite feel like I can hug them and make it all better yet. In these situations, that's when things... [more]
favorited 12 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

I mean, did she talk about the surgery at all? Or talk about any after-effects? Conceivably someone could have a really fast, great recovery, but it would just be weird to have been really upfront with your friends about the diagnosis and the... [more]
favorited 3 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

If your friend had a double mastectomy, recovery time is the the 3-6 week range. None of my friends have required this surgery so far, but everyone I know who had a big surgery which required a hospital stay (you're in the hospital for three or... [more]
favorited 3 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

Fiorentini & Baker is absolutely canonical for high-quality all-leather women's boots. Gimme Shoes stocks some; you can also order from Ped (at the link), who are very reliable and helpful. That link goes to one pair of boots but the sidebar... [more]
favorited 4 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

Can you just tell them, "Listen, I know it's upsetting to you that you've hurt me - I appreciate that you care about my wellbeing. But I need to process this myself - I've got to ask you to work through your feelings on your own or with someone... [more]
favorited 4 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

Also, if he told his little brother "f**k you" and is punished for swearing, does that mean that it would have been better if he'd said "I hate you, you ruin everything"? Honestly, virtually all of the most hurtful things my... [more]
favorited 8 times
Ask MeFi comment - Two years ago

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