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What's so special about these other people and why do they get a free pass when they're being blatantly in-your-face-rude or whatever? I suspect that those people are men, and that you are not. To be less abrasive, you have to want to be... [more]
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Have you asked her what she wants from you about this? Is it something that she is really ready to talk about? Does she have good friends who are masculine-of-center (that seems to be the hipster catchall term right now)? Or good male... [more]
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"Prejudice". That's your answer. "She is prejudiced against men." "They are prejudiced against whites". The point of "sexism is privilege plus power" is to create a way around the verbal impasse... [more]
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My first response is "that sounds juvenile - although I find it distasteful on a political level, it also sounds so childish/faux-transgressive that it would make me think less of a person or business if I heard it. My gut... [more]
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If I may make a suggestion: there is some real evidence that apples can improve your cholesterol even in the absence of other factors. Anecdotal evidence: I went from quite high cholesterol elevated to the point where I was going to start medication... [more]
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My political position on prisons is about as radical as it's possible to get - far, far to the left of most mefites. However, even in radical anti-prison circles, we would never suggest that you have any obligation to someone who did you a... [more]
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I think that on some level, I've made the unconscious decision that I don't think I want to have a child that matures inside of an increasingly unhealthy body, who's going to be passively eating processed crap because of his/her mother's poor... [more]
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Either way, this isn't about conscious thoughts being perverted into something else, it's about conditioning someone from a very young age so that their sexuality remains off-limits to them in every way except those sanctioned by their society.... [more]
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They aren't treating you very well - they've condensed two real positions into one benefitless contract position, probably because they feel that they can walk all over you. This is the kind of thing that unions, for instance, forbid in our... [more]
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I guess if I were you and there were some genuine redeeming features to this guy, plus maybe some mitigating circumstances... ....let's say that he's materially generous, laughs at people's jokes, and has genuinely been nice to people in... [more]
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I think there's something lurking in the background here: different groups and (lord knows) different generations have really different takes on the whole "I think we're attracted to each other so I'll just lean in and kiss her" business.... [more]
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Karma Chameleon. I hadn't seen this for years and years and had remembered it as a vaguely utopialy multiracial costume-heavy piece, and it totally is! I really, really love how the story is very much about a collective rather than an... [more]
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I would like fewer single-link-Toast posts, just because, I mean, I read The Toast. I like discussing The Toast at metafilter, but maybe not quite as often... But I wonder if some Toast-Posts could possibly be embiggened - like... [more]
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I am sort of like you - I fall in love long before there's sex or dating and I stay in love for a long time. It's not actually a good idea - maybe it worked well in, like, 1793 middle Europe or whatever, but even Goethe was getting some on... [more]
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If she's really depressed and/or anxious, she may be too frightened by your absence to be able to recognize your need for your own time--she may not be able to think beyond the most pressing, immediate need of the moment. So it's not a question of... [more]
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Maybe ask him what he thinks being "nice" means? The biggest problem with starting to be a "nice" (ie, passive-aggressive, resentful) guy is that is ruins your character. You start out feeling a little insecure and a little... [more]
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I'm a 90% vegan. It's incoherent and makes some of my stricter friends frown - so I don't discuss my diet with them. That said: 1. I think the culture of vegan strictness has actually been helpful to me; I find that when I don't really,... [more]
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I'm generally fine with this unless your beliefs are abhorrent. I once had an "Intercessor for God" (that's what he called himself) tell me the reason my mother was dying of cancer was because she was relying on chemo instead of faith.... [more]
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