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No. Don't. You have an impression that she thought you had a fake ID. You also have an impression that she intentionally didn't offer to get you another drink. For this, you want to call up and get someone chewed out or fired? And if... [more]
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We all know that guy - I know a "that guy" who actually changed himself (by conversations, reading feminist books and a lot of self-reflection and hard work) and is, seven years later, a much nicer and happier person with a wonderful... [more]
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"My wife is not attractive". That's cold. Holy crap, that's cold. If I found out that my partner flatly referred to me as "not attractive", I'd....well, it would be the start of the end of it all. Honestly, if I were you,... [more]
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Once again it is so weird to me that we've got two things at the same time: many, many black women saying that they do not feel represented in popular culture, that they would like to be represented as frequently/normally as white folks are,... [more]
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It occurs to me that this dude is getting what he wants - he has sex with you, he has the kinds of conversations that he enjoys but does not have conversations he finds difficult or boring, he can tell you that you are "too emotional" if... [more]
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I'm pretty sick of articles where women humblebrag that they're so transgressive because although babies grew in their wombs they still think about sex and have social lives and haven't taken up tatting or started wearing SAS shoes or whatever... [more]
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You know, we've been through this "it's enlightened, rational and modern to have open relationships" thing before, in the sixties and early seventies. It didn't work super-well for women. (I say this as someone who is actually in an open... [more]
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The "tyranny of pronouns" thing sounds weird to me. In my circles, when someone's gender is unknown or they're genderqueer or whatever, we just say "they", as in "I saw Lee on the bus, and they said they'd be at the show... [more]
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(I pause to add that "The Game" absolutely skeeves me out, as it does pretty much every woman I know. If I got even the faintest hint that a guy was using PUA/Game stuff on me, I would walk away, possibly after saying something mean.... [more]
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As a cyclist, the idea of someone deciding that he is in fact not actually too high to drive a car scares the living fuck out of me. All that has to happen is that his reflexes are off when something unexpected happens, and I am a bloody heap... [more]
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I began to feel hurt and to have real doubts about whether we were a good match. I said this to him. He then said it was very important to him to have me in his life, I am special, he likes the reflective conversations we have, but I was blowing... [more]
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I mean, a lot of this kind of nonsense movement-baiting (which is what the NYT framing is) suffers hugely from not being specific enough about the people and issues involved. Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore, for instance, isn't talking about... [more]
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This article is about a specific UK situation, right? Here is a thing that I think folks outside of long-term radical activist circles don't tend to realize (and, because I tend to hang around with cultural anarchists and do much more ad hoc... [more]
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I'm reminded of something that happened when I was in high school - something that seems related to the other discussion about Mumia Abu-Jamal. There was this bully, see. Eddie H----. In retrospect, he was obviously from a messed-up working... [more]
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Has it been terribly rude for me to tell people that their new haircut looked nice, or that they made a funny joke? Is there some deeper difference I'm missing here, or is it just that "exotic" is a term that's now being absorbed into... [more]
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My goodness, how weird make-up is. Also, those giant doll-eyes that seem to be a tumblr make-up standard - I had no idea that you can have fairly small eyes and still do them, I'd just assumed that all those girls had large eyes to begin with. I... [more]
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As a “lady adventurer,” a female traveler, I have never had that particular privilege. I am an intruder; I am a stranger; I am a woman in public spaces – tea houses, street corners – often deemed the exclusive provenance of men. I do not have the... [more]
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Yeah - I think the "Thatcher Destroyed Industry" narrative misses where the UK was in 1979. Rampants strikes, blackouts, demarcation, inflation up at 30%. The Labour party was in freefall, and industry was on its knees. But the... [more]
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I wouldn't want to know. I don't want to know every time my partner does something less than awesome but that does not impact me in any way. I don't want a confessional relationship with my partner, or to be my partner's moral keeper. My... [more]
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They just want to be pretty, to be looked at and admired, while the machinery that turns lost girls into profit for unscrupulous men churns and grinds away their lives. See, I'm really uneasy about this logic - certainly it's a better... [more]
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