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A friend and a heroin addiction - what to do? Your stories?
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Ask MeFi post - 2 months ago

I don't know what will happen with you, but it takes a long time to get better. I have always been an anxious and depression-prone person. I had an episode of severe depression and anxiety starting in 2003. It took a year after the worst part... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

More, actually, people think that's it's emotionally fulfilling and appropriate for you to spend your energy on the boss's daughter. [more]
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MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Another thing to consider--how financially stable are you likely to be? Are your jobs stable? Will you be able to pay for whatever standard of living you'd like your children to have? When you have to do serious economizing, will this place stress... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I think you should see if you can have a couple of sessions with a counselor to try to unpick some of this stuff. I know two people who will absolutely admit that they had kids (now in the 5-8 age range) and regret it deeply. Although they're... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

This may or may not be useful to you, but something in your post reminded me of Feelings I Have Had: In your post, you say that you're afraid. And that makes sense - I'd be afraid, too. An additional thing I've discovered from working through... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 2 months ago

Actually, I think the clip garter one would be pretty useful (not the penny one as much, for fabric-damage reasons). Back when I wore skirts and biked in them, I pretty much chose skirts based on being a fairly structured a-line that was just above... [more]
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MeFi comment - 2 months ago

I feel like an ass for asking this, but I need some context for this. Is anti-Native bigotry a bigger issue in the Twin Cities than it is elsewhere? Boston has a reputation for being a very liberal city (as does NYC, where the show premiered), but... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I kind of want to reread these now. I loved them when I was...hm...I remember leaving one in my desk over the weekend by mistake, realizing this at Girl Scouts and being absolutely gutted since I'd been looking forward so much to... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I am really looking forward to reading this book - about fifty million great new things came out this past year (two new Hal Duncans, Sarah Tolmie's Stone Boatmen, A Stranger In Olondria and on and on) so I haven't had a chance to get it yet. But... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

It is true - there aren't donuts. I mean, I have had some very fine donuts from various non-donut-centric pastry shops, and I've had some very disappointing overpriced hipster donuts but I never in all my life thought I would miss Dunkin'... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 months ago

The Hal Duncans are a highly-praised book of SF theory/criticism and a book of short stories, Scruffians. I've just blown all my book allowance on used books at the Goodwill, so I don't think I'll be getting either this month, but they're on... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

Feels like clothes should be black. Yep, here's your problem. Goths can wear all black and so can ninjas and crusty punks and people wearing formal mourning; otherwise, no. If you have as you say dark hair and an olive complexion, you can... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 months ago

When folks are all "but if we pay reparations to African-Americans, what about Native people, what about.....etc, etc" my thought is "sure, why not"? Why not figure out some sort of reparation for everyone? Why not shake... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I also love that we are not pretending that dabbling with drug addiction is fun and that we are acknowledging that recovering from addiction is hard work. I love that Ms. Hudson is trans* and no one gives a fuck. I love that Watson calls Sherlock... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I think that the more pressure you place on someone to do something For Moral Reasons the harder it can become for them to actually do it. Obviously, reading has become pretty loaded - probably far more loaded than you would ever feel it to be - at... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I envision imaginary homes (which might solve your "favorite home feels far away" problem). They're all impossible - an ocean-going floating pavilion, a house carved out of a mid-ocean rocky cliff, a sequence of loggias built along a... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 months ago

The thing is, my relative has good days, and good hours. She chose to live out this illness, and we were unbelievably fortunate to be able to care for her. But this isn't even one of the really brutal dementias - this is an... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I wonder if high-achieving people deal with Alzheimer's differently than others? Like if they can't be their usual brilliant selves they don't want to be at all? I have very mixed feelings about assisted suicide. The issue with dementing... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

What I think about is ruining my partner's life by destroying their career (since we couldn't afford full time care so they'd have to quit and try to live on disability and savings, and the condition that my near relative has requires full time care... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

. Captive breeding has saved a not-insignificant number of species from extinction. Given a choice between "zoos" and "vast wildlife sanctuaries where the animals roam free, unmolested by humans" yeah, it's a no-brainer, no... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I feel that if you're holding a party at the dinner hour, you're expected to provide enough food to feel like dinner - it doesn't need to be dinner, but it needs to be pretty serious snack food. Also, you don't want a bunch of hungry... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 months ago

Leave leave leave leave. 1. No one is as irreplaceable as we think we are, given the medium term. 2. If you need to think of the good of the company, think about this: this project maybe isn't as great as it could be right now, and... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 months ago

Soylent is for people who to a large extent are not interested in eating, people who don't care what their nutrition tastes like, or even how it happens (IV drip would be fine, thnx!), so long as it's effective and convenient. I'd actually... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

(to clarify - it's not that every dude who can't cook has always had a woman to cook for him. It's that there is a cultural assumption that caretaking - of the body, the home, the emotions - is women's work and men don't need to learn it.... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I love several of my exes, and might conceivably tell them so on an important occasion. However, I love them in a particular post-relationship way based on our past intimacy. It's great, in fact, to be able to love someone in that almost... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I'm what I call a bad vegan - I'm vegan most of the time, but under stress or on special occasions I have egg-based and cheese-based lapses. So this is not unlike drinking while healthy, or whatever. Why don't I just go back to being a... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 months ago

If you have the budget, too, here are a couple of other ideas: Chevre with herbs - get some of the plain goat cheese at the grocery store and mix with chopped fresh herbs; serve with crackers from an attractive bowl The nicer kind of nuts -... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 months ago

Actually, what I remember of the peak oil conversations I was hearing was basically "really bad things like fracking will become economically reasonable, there will be giant awful pipelines and lots more pollution", not "we will... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

esp. if they're low wage cooks who are basically imperfect food robots rather than actual chefs with cooking skills. And this is why we will never have nice things - unless you're some kind of google-ista, you're just an imperfect robot... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

What I wonder about is what happens when the underclass can no longer afford to consume. Right now we're in a sort of sweet spot, where there are still working class jobs that pay enough for people to buy non-essentials, even if they're shitty... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I really liked Zebda - I haven't heard any of their recent stuff, but Le bruit et l'odeur was considered quite good when it came out, and I like the whole album with "Tomber la chemise" on it, Essence ordinaire. I felt like both of these... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 months ago

BTW, you can peel celery to get rid of the strings. But then you have to peel the celery. I can't even bring myself to bother peeling carrots, and carrots are good.... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I just have to say that the harassment thing at Wiscon seems very, very shocking to me. It's really disappointing how often this stuff boils down to whose ox is gored - your friend is a harasser; my friend is just misunderstood.... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

Listen, there's going to need to be a massive realignment of our country's tax and governance structures regardless. Advancing technology coupled with laissez-faire capitalism is going to be a bad ride for almost everyone but the 1%. Between... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

Forget shopping malls, think bigger. Except for high end stores, retail is dead. First Barnes & Noble will shutter, then the jewelry stores, then the electronics stores, then the rest. All that will be left will be restaurants, groceries... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

Harrowing and extremely brave. I hope I never get Alzheimer's, but if I do, I hope I can go like she did. A close relative is in the grip of a rare early-onset condition related to Alzheimer's, although not, mercifully, as cruel. My... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I am familiar with this problem. Like you, I had no success with the nerdy guys who were more similar to me (this was back when I dated dudes) and all my dating success came with non-nerdy guys. The relationships went very well in the sense that... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I think I heard this on Backstory a few months back -- that when the whites started landing en masse on American soil, they were amazed at the lushness of the land, where edible crops seemed to be everywhere, and the lands teemed with game. They... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I'd call the vet and try to get in right now on an emergency basis. This sounds, based on my experience with our older cat, very concerning. [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 months ago

You know, we've been through this "it's enlightened, rational and modern to have open relationships" thing before, in the sixties and early seventies. It didn't work super-well for women. (I say this as someone who is actually in an open... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 months ago

I don’t remember the last time I messaged someone to say that I was thinking about them, or the last time that I received a message of that nature, but I think about people all day. Nice thoughts. From now on, I’ll just Yo them. I don't... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

And you could just text someone "yo". I believe I have received this very text, and knew it to indicate that, like, my friend had arrived and was waiting for me to unlock the door since our doorbell was broken.... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

Personally, I'd call and talk to the office manager before doing anything else. I have received another person's faxed medical records when someone misdialed, and all I did was call them to tell them and then shred the records. I think that... [more]
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Ask MeFi comment - 3 months ago

It must have been like living in a horror movie in the years of first contact. You would go from everything being normal, like it had been for as long as anyone could remember - with historical events and migrations and great leaders or... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

You know, if I were Dan Savage and I were well-intentioned, I would just let the whole thing fucking go, not write about it, mention it only if asked, etc. It's really difficult to know how this actually went down without having been... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

For almost every question you can see a mile away what your answers should be to make sure no one thinks you're a fascist, and of course no one wants to be thought a fascist, so I'm sure there's a lot of conscious or subconscious adjustment of... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

How do I lawn? How do I garden?
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Ask MeFi post - 3 months ago

I wonder if the behavior existed before the achievements that put her on a pedestal. I know that large amounts of money can turn otherwise cool people into selfish assholes, but does it naturally follow that the adulation associated with having... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

For the same reason that most reasonable people don't consider Senatorial crusades against violent video games or violent movies or whatever to be appropriate or productive responses to real-life violence. Because such efforts simplify away and... [more]
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MeFi comment - 3 months ago

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