Maybe she thinks I'm being a poseur?

That's because you are a poseur. In fact, you are a huge poseur. And you know why? It's because you want to have your sexuality be a major part of your identity but you don't want to have to experience the social repercussions for your choice. You want to identify yourself but you don't want others to identify you which, I'm sorry, is ridiculous. Your identity has social consquences; until you accept that, no... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 11:41 AM on August 8, 2008

Oh hey, I did something like this on memorial day weekend .

If you went straight from NYC, google maps is telling you to go north, through Albany and the rest of NY State.Since I was visiting middle VT and picking up my rental car in Port Chester (yay to non-nyc rental rates + Metro North), I instead went through CT and western Mass.

In western mass is the town of Deerfield which is home to a giant Yankee Candle tourist attraction. They have a... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 1:17 PM on August 7, 2008

on preview, TPS already said this.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 1:18 PM on August 7, 2008

if you add a dollar sign, it looks like a curvaceous female who sued your ass for creating a dumb emoticon to represent her.

$O3=

(and, really, i don't see it. It looks like a capital shooting a laser beam out of its nose)
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 9:31 AM on August 7, 2008

The thing that bothers me is that I know that he was very happy her and that the only reason they aren't together is that she moved across the country. However, he said they had "tried to work things out but it's not going to happen."

This guy is not over his ex and doesn't want to be over his ex. He's lying to you and himself. He jokes about marriage because he's playing a game where he enjoys that you want to be with him but he still is... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 9:51 AM on August 1, 2008

I'm curious why thearpy is now an option when it wasn't before. What has changed in this last month that has changed your views on the relationships in your life?

There are plenty of people with preferences in life and, amazingly enough, the racial makeup of someone can also be a preference. However, since race is a social concept and we live in a supposed enlighted environment, your preference does have social consquences.

Asian girls are... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 9:37 AM on August 1, 2008

Argh. I forgot to mention something.

Now, in the US, there is a culture of fetishizing Asian women to the point of absurdity. If you've ever spent 5 minutes on the internet, you will know what I mean. There is an attitude where Asian women stop being women and start being objects. This can happen to any ethnic or racial group but american men (and I'm assuming you're american) + asian girl is also a stereotype that is prepetuated throughout the mass media as something... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 9:47 AM on August 1, 2008

Craigslist is how I went in the past. I don't have much advice to give you except that if the future roommate mentions how where they last lived, their roommates were jerks, their roommates weren't the jerks and you should avoid this person. Ask questions about their last living arrangements, how it ended, etc.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 1:27 PM on July 31, 2008

Her ex-husband flat out refuses for no reason other than to inconvenience his ex-wife

I'm sorry but if I had a 3 year old child, I would not even let my best friends take her on a trip back to her mother. It is not unreasonable for the father to request that someone he trusts takes control over. Is it inconvienent? Yes. Is it unreasonable? No. At first, I thought a call to the C.O. might be the best bet but, re-reading your question, the father is... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 12:27 PM on July 31, 2008

(I'm assuming you're male and that the engagement ring is for a female).

For a large segement of the population, if you are buying a diamond, you should aim for something around 1 carat. a 1 carat diamond will cost (depending on cut and quality of stone; aim for a vs1 and G or H color), around 4-5 thousand dollars. Another 500-1000 for the setting leaves you with a ring in the 5-6k range. If you are an average american and make 40k a year, this means that the ring... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 9:23 AM on July 30, 2008

Encourage her to embrace those things that every 20 year old needs: experiences outside their own culture, world, and head. Teach her to embrace new experiences, to interact daily with societies and people that look and act differently than her; encourage her to study abroad, learn a new language, move to a large city. Tell her to apply for the peace core, to do charity work in a developing country, etc. etc.

But don't expect her Christian faith to disapear; you'll be... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 10:03 AM on July 28, 2008

You never had a really good education on Sin while as a teenager, did you? Rather than focusing on the concept of sin, you were taught a legalistic form of christian morality where the individual acts of sin were given emphasis and the concept of Sin was pushed aside. You claim to be less religious now - I would say you were never religious in the first place. A moral legalistic view of theology leads to rituals and also leads to not being able to answer the question that you asked which is:... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 7:21 AM on July 25, 2008

She kinda fulfills are your hipster dreams, doesn't she? She's young, pretty, a "dancer", you met her at a music festival, spent all your time together, etc. She kinda fulfills are your dreams right now, doesn't she.

The problem is that, no matter how long you talked to her, you don't know who she is yet. It doesn't matter that you sat around talking till 2 am drink PBR's at some bar, she is still some girl that you've only known for a few days. She isn't... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 1:00 PM on July 22, 2008

H&M smalls will fit you and XS modern fit mx shirts from Express (but they only carry XS in black, gray, and white).
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 7:31 PM on July 16, 2008

Dangle.

Kids are able to successfully dangle their feet for years before their feet toucht the ground so adults can handle it too. Focus on sitting up straight and working on your posture - it will alleviate the pain, make you appear taller in your chair, and will end up making you look as adult as you'd like to be preceived. As a short guy, I tend to run into the same problem sometimes and rather than focusing on where your feet go, it's much better to focus on how... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 8:02 AM on July 15, 2008

Guys, stereotypically but with a grain of truth, tend to decide when they want to settle down and then find the person they're going to marry. He is looking to settle down, move in, and get married again...right now. And, no matter how much he says, he really is not having as wonderful a time with you as you think he is. And why? Because he's looking for a future with someone and that someone isn't you.

His internal clock is ticking and he's willing to put the effort,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 11:06 AM on July 14, 2008

Allow each other to make small meaningless mistakes and not get bothered by them. If you prefer your loaf of bread on the counter and your fiancee prefers it in the freezer, if you find the loaf in the freezer or if your fiancee finds it out on the counter, it's okay to be slightly annoyed that it's not the way you want it but it's not okay to get resentful or take it personally and assume that they are trying to sabotage your quality of life. If it really becomes a problem (or if you really... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 9:41 AM on July 12, 2008

sputnick
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 10:12 PM on July 11, 2008

Rather than tell your girlfriend about it right away, instead work on coming up with funny and witty comebacks to when she catches you picking your nose. She'll either a) not care b) think it's weird but love you anyways c) point at you and say "there is a finger in your nose". Now, if it's c), you have many options available to you.

You can act surprised and shocked that your finger took its own initiative and ended up in your nose. You can act shocked and... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 9:00 AM on July 10, 2008

Sublet. Don't put his name on the lease. Have the 3rd roommate sign a sublease agreement with you and file that with your landlord. This does make YOU liable for any damages/problems/etc that this guy causes but it does give you more options to go to small claims (if need be) and, if you need to kick him out, he can't fall back on being on the lease and having a much claim to the apartment as you do.

I ended up doing this and ended up having a subletter who was a... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 1:24 PM on July 9, 2008

Don't do it yourself. Take your male friend to an actual place that is familiar with back waxing (and you will want to get it waxed - nair and hair removal lotions aren't effective when there is an extremely large amount of hair to remove) and allow a professional to do it. They will know the proper technique to minimize pain and the right materials to use.

The thing about waxing is that the more you do it, the less the hair will grow back. And when it does grow back,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 10:58 AM on July 8, 2008

Are you okay with being "that guy"? Are you okay with this possibly blowing up and becoming a huge deal? Are you okay with her husband chasing you with a hammer? Are you really okay with not having feelings for her (because you've already fallen for her and you want her more than as a fuck buddy) and are you willing to shit not only where you eat but where you live?

If yes to all of those questions, then go for it. It's your funeral.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 9:50 AM on July 4, 2008

So you basically already knew what you were going to do and just wasted our time.

At any rate, this seems like a case of a woman who is generally happy with her life with the exception of her sexual needs.

Or she is a complete liar. It seems strange that if you really do believe the bullshit you just spouted out (and you really don't or else you would never have posted this to ask.me anonymously) that you would be able to... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 3:52 PM on July 4, 2008

Or is he just not into me, full stop?

Well, you didn't provide any real information for this question but the basic problem here is that you do not feel as if you are the priority in your lover's life. You want to feel "special" and feel like you are the most important thing in his life. Right now, you've said that one way to feel that way is if you were called more than once a week. That might be true. In fact, there could be a million... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 11:08 PM on July 3, 2008

"Are you as into bacon as the rest of the internet?"

"Bears, friend or foe?"

"Do you like ice cream?" (never trust someone who doesn't like ice cream; they're usually a spy)

"I never really liked Harry Potter. How about you?" (this can lead to a conversation that lasts for an hour or more)

"Do you say babby or do you say baby?"
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 2:12 PM on July 3, 2008

Finding a shirt that will fit your abnormal proportions is going to be very very tricky. Instead, go to your major collar oriented stores such as banana republic, j crew, h&m, or whatever and buy shirts that fit you around the bust. They will be too big for your stomach and waist but that's okay - fit your largest part. Then take that shirt to the tailor, invest in the 10 or 20 bucks, and have it taken in.

The only way you're going to find great shirts that fit... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 9:35 AM on July 3, 2008

nervous about how I approach this subject

So let me get this straight, you are over the age of 18 and your parents allow you to live in their home while you study in college. You are currently dating a woman around your age who is going to stay in your parents house for a few days. Your parents have mentioned several times that she will sleep in a separate bedroom and, rather than voice your concern at the time, you instead get scared and nervous to... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 6:23 PM on July 1, 2008

For anyone who answered "yes" to your questions, ignore their answers. They didn't read the book or, if they did, they didn't understand the book and I think you're missing a big chunk of the book too.

The premise of the book is not only "he's not that into you". The main premise of the book is for women who want to get married (and that bares repeating) to not dwell on guys by making excuses for the men in their lives and having these women end up... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 10:35 AM on June 29, 2008

If you're at the office, wear an undershirt. If you're out and about, wear what you want.

However, if you're a hater for undershirts, there are many good reasons to wear an undershirt besides just how it looks. It helps draw sweat and grime and odors away from not only your body but also your polo shirt which helps keep you looking refresh, clean, and the cotton helps your back stay cool and allows your back to breathe during the day. If you're going to be sweating,... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 1:47 PM on June 27, 2008

I know these are all selfish feelings and I need help getting over them and find happiness in the fact that she's not sitting in our apartment worrying about me. And I need to go find something to do.

Oh Lord, these are not selfish feelings. You are dating a girl who does not really care about you the way you care about her. She isn't "technically" a straight girl trying to pretend to be a lesbian. What she really is is a person who loves... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 8:53 AM on June 25, 2008

1) buy Shape magazine. Do the ab and core muscle exercises that they recommend in it every day.
2) start doing pushups - follow a 3 day a week plan similar to this.
3) cut all snacking from your diet. limit yourself to several small meals a day. drink more water.
4) while you're waiting in line or something, or at the office, take a break and practice lunges. There are, in fact, hundreds of exercises you can do while at the office or waiting somewhere that... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 6:35 PM on June 19, 2008

Oh, and it sounds like you've fallen into the mistaken belief that because you're a mom, you don't have to take care of yourself or that you CAN'T take care of yourself as much as you deserve. I'm sorry but this is extremely misguided and if Tim Gunn, Carson Kresley, Stacey London and Clinton Kelly have taught me anything its that the less you focus on yourself and the more your propel this "martyr complex", the more unhappy and less able to be a good mother, humanitarian, lover, etc.... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 6:42 PM on June 19, 2008

Pushups.

You should really embrace doing pushups. Google around, use youtube, figure out the proper form for pushups, and then follow the "100 pushups" plan which is a 3 day a week push up program to help train you to beable, at some point in the future, to do 100 pushups at 1 point. Doing pushups will tone not only your arms but will also help with your chest. The more tone your chest is, the less defined the stretch marks around your torso will become and... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 7:44 AM on June 12, 2008

She's been diagnosed with IBS which, as I understand it, means they don't really know what the problem is or how to treat it.

You'd rather complain about your girlfriend's gas rather than spend five minutes and try to figure out what IBS is? Holly crap. If you want to be able to discuss this with your girlfriend, lose the Im-the-victim or I'm-a-martyr routine and edcuation yourself. IBS can be treated through a change in diet. One smart thing would... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 2:07 PM on June 11, 2008

I know I'm an awesome guy, a great husband etc. And I see plenty of other people who look similar to me going shirtless and no seeming to care. Why can't I get to that place?

Those people see their gut as a something to be proud of. - you obviously don't. It doesn't really matter what everyone else thinks or says about how you look - you obviously dislike how you look to the point where you won't take your shirt off. Your body is your insecurity and... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 12:34 PM on June 9, 2008

Not about summer...but sounds like summer....

Mr T Experience - The Weather is Here, Wish You Were Beautiful
The Queers - Goodbye California
The Queers - The Sun Always Shines Around You
The Queers - Sidewalk Surfin Girl
Teenage Bottlerocket - Wasting Time
The Unloveables - Vacation
Bad Religion - Forbidden Beat
Ramones - Rockaway Beach
Ramones - Surfin' Bird (or you can get... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 3:32 PM on June 5, 2008

Also

Tiger Army - Hotprowl
Rancid - Avenues and Alleyways
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 3:36 PM on June 5, 2008

Call the rental places before you go pick up a car to see if they'll accept non-US driver's licenses/documentation. The ones in midtown manhattan might not but I do know that the ones at LGA will.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 8:29 AM on June 4, 2008

That sounds almost too good to be true. Cable and utilities included? That would run roughly 120 a month. So you're really only paying 1200 a month for a 1 bedroom on the upper west side. That is cheap for the area. In fact, that's almost too cheap.

Go and look at the place. If you're thinking of getting it sight unseen, you are going to get screwed and scammed. For comparison, Washington Heights and Inwood (where you can still get good deals if you are lucky) is... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 12:18 PM on June 2, 2008

He's not that interested in you. If he was, he'd get the hints and make more of an effort.

You're in friendship land. Doesn't mean you can't get out of it pretty easily (just be blunt and ask him out rather than leave hints) but that's where you are currently.

i.e. he ain't gonna make the first move.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 9:18 PM on May 31, 2008

Drive over that sky bridge thing over the harbor and scare yourself silly.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 10:30 AM on May 29, 2008

The stands at St. Marks have a lot of cheap 10 dollar rings or less. And Bleeker street is good too.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 1:05 PM on May 12, 2008

I second Hugo Boss. Try Rothman's in Union Square. And also take a look at Brooke's Brother stores. Look for suits that are French or Italian cut - they can be slimer fit (though that's not guarantee - I have a few Italian suits that needed/need a lot of work done to them. argh).

Also, get a good tailor. Any suit you're gonna get, you're gonna need tailored. Find a good one and take all your suits to them and get them altered.

I'd avoid any... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 1:49 PM on May 9, 2008

any kind of styles. I'm familiar with GQ and Esquire but there's got to be more.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 2:12 PM on May 8, 2008

A friend mentioned Men's Non-No which is Japanese but its something and seems to have good pictorials of recent male fashion shows.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 2:33 PM on May 8, 2008

Go to Rocky Mountain National Park. Some of the most beautiful mountains and spaces in the world. If you go on an especially cloudy day, driving up Trail Ridge Road will be scary/an awesome experience.

Also, the Stanley Hotel is in Estates Park. It's haunted and the hotel that the Shinning is based on. If you have a chance, stay there.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 9:20 AM on May 5, 2008

I gave that much because I wanted to give that much. Receiving an sort of incentive besides updates on how my money was being used and how it was bettering other people's lives is all the "motivation" that I need.

But I like the idea of never receiving a paper donor mailing. Throw in a we'll-never-beg-via-email and that might be pretty sweet.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 1:51 PM on April 16, 2008

There was earlier today at least- there was a drawn picture of a girl writing a letter, that linked to her hotmail e-mail address. That's all there was.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 11:11 AM on April 12, 2008

#1. It's good that you are thinking about clothing now rather than falling into the trap of "I'll buy new clothes once I lose five pounds". If you're going to thrust yourself into the outdoors, you need to dress the body you have now. If you do lose weight, you can always buy/tailor/invest in new outfits. But coming up with some decent style can come about with any body type.

Check out or buy Dress Your Best. It is by the two hosts of What Not To Wear. The... [more]
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 10:57 AM on April 12, 2008

I've known many male cats to hump things (blankets, pillows, whatever) no matter when they were chopped so, yes, it's normal.

Even those with no testicles need some love sometimes.
posted to Ask Metafilter by Stynxno at 11:26 AM on April 9, 2008