MeFi comment:
"5k tax deductions? My friends, everyone in America is going to get a box of bandaids, a bottle of aspirin, a fifth of Jack for pain and a bullet to bite on.
What the fuck is a five thousand dollar tax deduction going to do when GROUP health..." [
more]
favorited 4 times, recently by blueberry, DevilsAdvocate, Miko, brain cloud
4 days ago
MeFi comment:
"Fucking yuck to that.
I will still continue to eat everything from the sea however, because that's where god hid all the delicious shit. I will just continue to pretend that the worms, boogers, filth and botulism are only in other peoples food...." [
more]
favorited 14 times, recently by Balisong, dabitch, sarahmelah, booksandlibretti, bunnytricks, flibbertigibbet, exquisite_deluxe, [insert clever name here], hattifattener, Mamapotomus, dmd, nickyskye, freya_lamb, Faux Real
6 days ago
MeFi comment:
"I don't notice anything on how to vomit neatly, how to be reluctant to express your feelings for good reason or how to comport yourself with crazy old beardos who own the messy used book store and don't want to sell you that Jim McPhee book about..." [
more]
favorited 1 time, recently by ifjuly
7 days ago
MeFi comment:
"No, the glass has a 20% chance of being 100% empty, then breaking into shards which stick in your eye, which becomes infected, and in your blinded, dizzy state, you fall down a flight of stairs and break both your legs. Your HMO refuses to cover...." [
more]
favorited 1 time, recently by Gnatcho
11 days ago
MeTa comment:
"Superdelete, superdelete. Tricker treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat.
I will forgive Bush all his sins if he grants me unlimited one day immunity to take a vinegar soaked bullwhip to all the fucking greedhead cowardly..." [
more]
favorited 7 times, recently by Hat Maui, kolophon, drjimmy11, Solon and Thanks, kortez, Bernt Pancreas, Rafaelloello
11 days ago
MeTa comment:
"Hey my dear friends, enemies, acquaintances , fellow internet goof-offs and chuckleheads. Hi, how are you? Well, I hope. I suspect we can't answer or resolve many of the questions this thread has raised in the course of one long angry conversation...." [
more]
favorited 3 times, recently by vsync
11 days ago
MeFi comment:
"The only way (according to my gut, which is a potent, swampy place) that the current American situation can get any more surreal is if McCain changes his mind, agrees to the debate and then right after the first question about the economy throws down..." [
more]
favorited 51 times, recently by GrammarMoses, kryptondog, grubi, papafrita, Telf, schyler523, ST!NG, Benny Andajetz, harriet vane, Pigpen, Jimbob, figment of my conation, lupus_yonderboy, litlnemo, dejah420, donnagirl, zardoz, AsYouKnow Bob, nola, palomar, yhbc, fairytale of los angeles, Spatch, grabbingsand, billypilgrim, stavrosthewonderchicken, nooneyouknow, sister nunchaku of love and mercy, drezdn, Artichoke Dance Off!!, shiu mai baby, Hot Like Your 12V Wire, grapefruitmoon, pyrex, bepe, Meatbomb, RakDaddy, R343L, odinsdream, dan g., RussHy, mkb, thewittyname, East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94, blueberry, jonp72, ColdChef, Atom Eyes, mitzyjalapeno, designbot, cimbrog
2 weeks ago
MeTa comment:
"Don't get your dog high is one of my personal rules. If someone asks me what I think, I say, don't get your dog high.
Frankly dogs are already high and it's a fucking waste of reefer. If the dog comes over when you are smoking weed and acts..." [
more]
favorited 38 times, recently by Space Kitty, ifjuly
3 weeks ago
MeFi comment:
"My top 300 is just "Put it in Your Mouth" by Akinyele repeated 300 times with no explanation, which is why Jon's list is so much better.
Hanson has some kind of crazy songwriting workshop where they bring in all kinds of different people..." [
more]
favorited 4 times, recently by ifjuly
3 weeks ago
MeTa comment:
"actually, my dear wino, I will admit to a fondness for clam pizza
clam pizza is dope, I had a mussel and fennel pizza that was amazing.
I think a pizza can be whatever the person ordering wants it to be, within the limits of human capacity...." [
more]
favorited 2 times, recently by ifjuly
3 weeks ago
MeTa comment:
"The disadvantage of being a man or a woman is simply that at some point you have to look in the mirror and realize that you just ain't fucking tough enough for this old world. Advantages include: clean sheets, orgasms, book stores, a few moments of..." [
more]
favorited 9 times, recently by ifjuly
3 weeks ago
MeFi comment:
"I don't know about bacon salt, really, but just think about this for a minute:
You cook up some of that thick slab bacon, slooooowly. Then you take some fresh sliced sourdough bread and toast it lightly. Then you cut up one New Jersey beefsteak..." [
more]
favorited 68 times, recently by ifjuly, exceptinsects
3 weeks ago
MeFi comment:
"I clearcut the whole situation with a zippo and a can of Aquanet and then I very carefully fix, with copious spirit gum, a perfect circle of orange shag carpet that I cut out of the wall to wall setup in Guy Lombardo's house, right after he died in..." [
more]
favorited 21 times, recently by painquale, jokeefe, ST!NG, kcds, tawny, winna, atrazine, liza, five fresh fish, bitter-girl.com, lalochezia, sebastienbailard, BrotherCaine, seanmpuckett, spiderwire, jonmc, mosk, mullingitover, turgid dahlia, Sys Rq, Artw
3 weeks ago
MeFi comment:
"I was on super-duper hippie shrooms (but for real Loq, I feel you babes, too right. Sometimes you have to listen to half of Bob Marley Legend before they let you out of the fucking room.) the night Nixon died. They were the kind where you start..." [
more]
favorited 9 times, recently by Suparnova
Last month
MeFi comment:
"They have one of these at kids day at Belmont park, but it's even more ambiguous. It's clearly an... orifice of some kind, still has the distinct look of a genital, a penis/vagina type of thing, same horrible purples and yellows that emphasized the..." [
more]
favorited 2 times, recently by h00py, MythMaker
Last month
MeFi comment:
"How does an outfit even cost $300,000.00? Was it made out of pure heroin and uranium or something? Who are these fucking space creatures?
I'm heading over to donate to Obama right now...." [
more]
favorited 16 times, recently by notsnot, Lou Stuells, Devils Rancher, zardoz, clarahamster, contessa, euphorb, EarBucket, schyler523, gompa, fourcheesemac, agregoli, Flunkie, dydecker, milarepa, Balonious Assault
Last month
MeFi comment:
"Dude is not a good rapper, he's the archetype of a mall thug, down to the creepy rapid darting movements of ferret with ADD, he also ran someone over with his truck, he sucks, he's a dummy. HOWEVER, it is possible that he has some black friends that..." [
more]
favorited 7 times, recently by kid ichorous, kosem, teleri025, radiosig, The Light Fantastic, droplet, sondrialiac
Last month
MeFi comment:
"My favorite line was him saying we don't want big brother.
There is simply not enough vodka in the universe to erase the cognitive dissonance of hearing these venal, evil, emotional adolescents try to not only deny the last eight years, but their..." [
more]
favorited 9 times, recently by blueberry, weapons-grade pandemonium, RussHy, schyler523, brain cloud, madamjujujive, zarah, gaspode, Balonious Assault
Last month
MeTa comment:
"You're a very strange country, you know?
posted by timeistight at 3:37 AM
You have... no idea.
/Jeremy Irons as Claus Von Bulow
I don't care if we have another thread or not, but trying to comment in that thread is annoying from a typing..." [
more]
favorited 1 time, recently by KokuRyu
Last month
MeTa comment:
"due to a close relative being editorially involved in a book on cock and ball torture
Sociological text? How to? Memoir? Genre novel? Travel guide? Pop-up book?..." [
more]
favorited 1 time, recently by longsleeves
Last month
MeTa comment:
"SWEET BUTTFUCKING JESUS STOP CONCATENATING THEIR NAMES OR I WILL COME TO YOUR HOUSE AND LEAVE A FLAMING TWO THIRDS SCALE SCULPTURE OF HITLER DOING A D&C ON RACHEL RAY MADE OUT OF HUMAN FECES AND DIESEL FUEL ON YOUR LIVING ROOM FLOOR...." [
more]
favorited 17 times, recently by schyler523
Last month
MeTa comment:
"Sweet weeping Sanity Clause,
I would rather a million errors on the side of caution and empathy
and botched assumptions as to someone's mental state than this detached and myopic insistence that some random schmoe would be under constant..." [
more]
favorited 1 time, recently by Kid Charlemagne
Last month
MeTa comment:
"I have never ever once suspected that the world* would ever be crazier than me, that somehow the little Bugs Bunny/Hunter Thompson/G.G. Allin/Valerie Solanas/Samuel Beckett/Emma Goldman/George Romero monster that works my brain would ever just have..." [
more]
favorited 2 times, recently by billyfleetwood, supercrayon
Last month
MeTa comment:
"Many years ago my then girlfriend was fired from the famous bookstore that Jon lad works at for being "too helpful". Now she was a chatty sort, heart of gold certainly, but I do have to say that store has always done a good job of being an..." [
more]
favorited 1 time, recently by turgid dahlia
Last month
MeTa comment:
"Jason,
That user is a perfectly legitimate member of the community who has been nothing but useful in helping people determine how they want to spend the portion of their budgets that has been earmarked for device-assisted jackoff products...." [
more]
favorited 1 time, recently by brujita
Last month
MeFi comment:
"With all due respect, you have no idea...
We're talking about a product that is among the top 5% of all arabica coffees produced worldwide. It's been nurtured and coddled at every step from seed to cup. It begins with an extremely finicky tree..." [
more]
favorited 20 times
Last month
MeFi comment:
"The store that would be the first to stock legal weed would have to be 7-11. Half the shit on their shelves seems to have been created with the munchies in mind.
Seriously though, I haven't been stoned in a while but whenever I walk into the..." [
more]
favorited 4 times
Last month
MeTa comment:
"As long as we are on the subject, what is the brain lesion that causes people to flop into a thread about anything and announce that they don't like that thing like a petulant five year old child?
Does that happen in real life? Anyone ever have..." [
more]
favorited 8 times
Last month
MeTa comment:
"Yo mama so fat that when she fell down and broke her leg it was initially extremely painful and caused severe limitations to her mobility, but with reasonable attention from her doctor and about six weeks of bed rest she healed successfully and only..." [
more]
favorited 11 times
Last month
MeTa comment:
"I think it's a mistake to assume there is a hill for mefi to go down. There is plenty of civility and plenty of fuckerooity to go around and there always has been. I suggest your sample size is too small.
Personally I wish that people would..." [
more]
favorited 12 times
Last month
MeTa comment:
"I didn't say anything in the thread because I really try to respect the rules of Askme, which I think are good rules, and I couldn't answer his question, but the dude bought his ticket and he took his ride, he decided to write all those pompous and..." [
more]
favorited 4 times
Last month
MeFi comment:
"The only rule that ever should be adapted from softball is the requirement that everyone be completely fucking housed on cheap keg beer at all times.
Also I don't know why I care about this or why it makes me so angry, but I literally just snarled..." [
more]
favorited 3 times
Last month
MeTa comment:
"I was once trolling out in Long Island on my dad's dinky motorboat "The African Queen 7" (ask me what his favorite movie is) and I caught a sand shark, which is just like a regular shark except about the size of a large Italian Combo Hero..." [
more]
favorited 4 times
Last month
MeFi comment:
"Is privilege multipicative? I mean, like, would a manicure that involves putting tiny thongs on your fingertips count as privilege2?
I'm not sure if it's multiplicative, but that totally seems like something that Ray Smuckels would do...." [
more]
favorited 3 times
Last month
MeTa comment:
"One useful aspect to this thread is that I can keep track of which users are juvenile assholes who think the guidelines on the site are for other people, and which users actually pay attention to what the moderators say.
posted by scrump at 3:19..." [
more]
favorited 5 times
Last month
MeTa comment:
"Well ODiV,
I kinda think you are comparing two different things here. The pen question was tantamount to spam and it's a fun (I feel at least) little tradition around here to throw a little lightswitch rave in the thread until the mods arrive to..." [
more]
favorited 9 times
Last month
MeTa comment:
"Sausage and onions you fucking waterheads. Goddamn sausage and onions, Jesus wept. And I'm not even half a ginzo like Jon. The fuck?" [
more]
favorited 1 time
Last month
MeFi comment:
"I'm even more excited to vote for Obama now that I know we're going to be doing magical sodomy. Thanks Angry Crazyman!" [
more]
favorited 3 times
Last month
MeFi comment:
"That's a pretty creative way to get fired. When I wanted to get fired from my menial dead end shit job I just smoked a huge blunt to the dome and went and hid in the basement and drank a case of snapples...." [
more]
favorited 1 time
Last month
MeTa comment:
"Who doesn't tell a joke when someone makes a sincere apology? How else are they supposed to know they are off the hook? What do you do Cortex, give them a big gooey hug and get snot and tears all over their Polo sweater? Is that some west coast..." [
more]
favorited 1 time
2 months ago
