I don't have much to add to the excellent answers you've already received, but I wanted to say 2 things: 1) this is incredibly common - please know that you're not alone! and 2) it probably took a lot of guts for you to even post this question, and I'm so proud of you for doing it.
You will make it through this. You're already on your way. posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 7:44 AM on January 29, 2014
I think you've gotten some great advice upthread, so I'll just summarize the things that stuck out to me:
1) I can absolutely see why you'd want to go now, and I wouldn't put it off if I were you. If you do it right (see below), you'll never regret it. You don't need to go with your BF if he's not interested.
2) However, I would be very cautious about racking up a lot of debt in order to do so. As another poster said upthread, god forbid, but... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 5:40 AM on January 9, 2014
Thank you everyone! I'm going to try a few different kinds - blends, waffle weave and wide edges to start. I'll report back if I find something fantastic... posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 4:30 AM on January 9, 2014
I highly, highly recommend The Family Book by Todd Parr. I think it's so important for kids to see that families are all different sizes and colors and genders - and this book says it in such a sweet and fun way. My kids have largely outgrown it now (7 and 5), but we picked it up again recently and it prompted a discussion about kids who are adopted like one of their friends. I like to give it as a baby shower or birthday gift - every family should have one!... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 12:05 PM on October 23, 2013 marked best answer
I thought this part of cardinality's excellent answer was so good that it deserved an additional mention:
Some of the stuff can be addressed more with some planning ahead...you don't necessarily need to have chef skills to buy healthier prepared food, salads, fruit, have a healthy breakfast, etc. It just takes some organization and planning, and when your brain already has to devote so many RPM cycles to work & family stress PLUS the depression... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 10:59 AM on October 18, 2013
Thank you very much for the answers so far. To address some of frizz's questions:
There is no cost of membership in the PTO, and all parents are invited to be members. There are 550 students at the school. Right now we probably have around 150 'members' - parents who have attended a meeting and provided contact info to us (the school is not allowed to give contact info at the moment; we're working on this). Clearly we'd like to grow that number, but the first step to... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 9:22 AM on July 8, 2013
Thanks very much guys - think I have what I need. posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 3:36 AM on July 9, 2013
My guess is that your mom has a touch of what I call 'underdog preference'. These types of people are extraordinarily nice to others who they see as 'lower' or 'less' than themselves. This is not necessarily as mean or judgmental as it sounds - usually it means that they seek to help or improve people they think need it, such as people who are poor or sick. The problem starts when the underdog climbs up to a position of equality - then he/she becomes a threat and people like your mother will... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 8:23 PM on March 17, 2013
I see no reason why you wouldn't. Moving in together is a big deal, certainly, but it doesn't have to be permanent if it doesn't work out. If your argument is that you don't have the time to waste if it doesn't last, I'll respond that you don't have the time to NOT give this an all-in fair chance. Why spend any more time with only your foot in the door?
Others have said most of what I wanted to say, but I'll add... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 11:09 AM on February 27, 2013
A few years ago I would probably also have had the same reaction as some of the naysayers in this thread - 'how can a girl at 6 possibly know she's transgendered? Can't the parents just let her play with cars?' etc.
What completely changed it for me was an Oprah show on trans people which featured, among other guests, a young boy of about 8 or 9. He had been born female but absolutely knew, always, that his gender was male. Oprah asked his parents... [more] posted to MetaFilter by widdershinsat 9:58 AM on February 27, 2013
That was an engrossing article - impressive for Gawker. It made me think a lot about the impact of social media today and how baffling I find the almost addiction people have for it.
My father was a B-level celebrity in the small country where I grew up, and it felt like reporters would come to our house for a photo op whenever there was a slow news day. To me, it felt like a complete invasion of privacy and I hated it. Starting at around age 7 I started to hide... [more] posted to MetaFilter by widdershinsat 10:28 AM on February 22, 2013
available light, I should have been more clear in my comment that it was directed at the hangers-on like Bling and trolls like Carl. I think FB and the internet in general is an incredible boon for people like the mother in her quest to find others in similar situation and to create a community. Wanting to connect with like-minded people? Totally get it. Wanting to be famous for nothing? Totally don't get it.
@maiamaia, I have noticed that trend too and think it... [more] posted to MetaFilter by widdershinsat 9:52 AM on February 25, 2013
I have a fondness for Wandering Warrior by Da Chen, an off-beat children's/YA book, which is basically one long training montage.
Also, to echo some of the recommendations above, this is actually one of the many reasons I love Robin McKinley: her characters have to work to become good at something, rather than magically springing forth as a master/champion/THE ONE/whatever. She does it in most of her books - I remember being particularly enamored with it in Chalice,... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 11:38 AM on February 14, 2013
His cover of Baby Got Back is one of my all-time favorite covers - it cracks me up every single time I hear it, particularly the quack. If you haven't heard it, go get it - will not disappoint, I promise. posted to MetaFilter by widdershinsat 9:27 AM on January 18, 2013
I can't resist adding something to this wonderful thread - having kids adds such a richness to my life and it's by far the best decision I ever made. By far.
Love - I've tried, but I don't have the words to describe the depth of the love I feel for my 3 kids. It does not consume you, it transforms you. Into someone better than you ever thought you could be.
Joy - I always figured having kids would be fun - but seriously, it's a blast! All the... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 1:49 PM on January 17, 2013
So inspiring. I actually think the UFO one is my favorite - so unexpected and so, so cool. My least favorite is the hotel in NZ where the treehouses are right next to each other. Such a big part of the allure of the treehouse is to get away from it all and just be in nature - it completely ruins it that you have neighbors 20 feet away...
I always wanted a treehouse when I was a kid - now that I have kids of my own, I am seriously considering building one with them in... [more] posted to MetaFilter by widdershinsat 6:34 AM on January 17, 2013
It's funny how ingrained cliches are - Cloud 7 sounds so wrong in my head that my brain does a little stutterstep each time I think it. posted to MetaFilter by widdershinsat 2:03 PM on January 15, 2013
Linda Castillo's Kate Burkholder series is definitely rural and may fit the bill. They all take place in Amish country, and Kate is a police captain who grew up Amish and rejected it. A lot of the action centers around the juxtapositon of Amish life and the violence of the world around it, which I quite like, but I will warn you that the depictions of the violence are quite graphic.
Another of my favorites is Don Harstad. Sadly, it seems he only wrote 5 books or so,... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 8:54 AM on January 14, 2013
I forgot to mention that agriculture features prominently in both Castillo and Harstad's books, with parts of the plots intricately linked to farming practices and tools.
Barr, Hillerman and Box are rural but not necessarily agriculture/farming based. posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 9:01 AM on January 14, 2013
Oh! Oh! My favorite genre is YA dystopian and Robin McKinley is one of my all-time favorite authors. Here are some of my favorites, most of which I consider very well written:
- The Hunger Games trilogy by Suzanne Collins (obvious, but for the sake of completeness) - also, have you read her Underland Chronicles series? Aimed at a younger audience, probably 11-ish, but really quite good
- The Divergence trilogy by Veronica Roth - only book 1 and 2 are out... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 11:20 AM on January 9, 2013
Something similar happened to me in college, and I remember feeling similarly confused afterwards. This was a long time ago now, and I'll share my story with you in case my perspective can be helpful:
I was hanging out at a party with a guy who was a friend of a friend, and the punch being served was *much* stronger than I realized. I don't remember much of the evening, but I do remember waking up on my back in my living room, with his face coming in and out of focus... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 10:47 AM on January 2, 2013
Thank you all so much for your answers! After considering the power requirements, I decided the best option is to make a photobook per BlahLaLa's suggestion. I think she'd actually appreciate it more as well - less confusing for her and more showoff-able to her friends at the center.
I marked BLL's response as best answer, but all the responses helped me reach the decision, so thank you all! posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 7:08 AM on November 20, 2012
I've had experience on both sides here. If you'll bear with an anecdote for a moment:
The first non-family wedding I attended as a grown-up was for my college roommate, Jane. Jane had had a thing about hippos all her life and collected them - little ones, stuffed ones, stylized designs, you name it. She had a registry for the wedding, but, coming from a non-US background, I found that terribly gauche and wanted to get her something really personal and distinctive... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 12:55 PM on September 26, 2012
Truly amazing story. I have never even heard of a story where someone could say this: Today, I don't want to be somebody who wasn't raped. And I believe her!
Wow, this story really affected me and I'm still processing. To be able to turn something like that into a positive - well, if she can do that, then anything is possible. Thank you so much for sharing, The Hamms Bear. posted to MetaFilter by widdershinsat 6:35 PM on July 31, 2012
It's really nice knowing that there's decent people like this out there. I love positive stories like this and really appreciate them when they pop up on MeFi - thx emcat8! (and I'm so sorry about your mom and sister. I can't imagine what you must have dealt with.) posted to MetaFilter by widdershinsat 10:30 AM on July 30, 2012
My mind is a little bit blown right now - I had no idea he was ever not credited! Donald Duck comic books were huge in Norway when I was growing up, and though I have moved all over the world and gotten rid of most of my stuff more than once, one of the things I could never bring myself to get rid of was my collection of 6 (huge) hard-cover Disney collections (in Norwegian) - one volume each for Donald Duck; Scrooge McDuck; Huey, Dewey and Louie; Super-Donald; Mickey Mouse and Goofy. I have... [more] posted to MetaFilter by widdershinsat 10:52 AM on July 27, 2012
I lost count of how many times I choked up during that article. When I got to the part about the 8-year old who was able to point to her accuser in court because her BACA member had her on her lap, well it was all over. Thank you so much for linking to it, Molesome. I'm off to send a donation right now.
God, I LOVE hearing about people standing up for kids (and animals). So many people pay lipservice, but these guys are actually out there, taking 5-hr... [more] posted to MetaFilter by widdershinsat 10:40 AM on July 19, 2012
Wow, I can't believe I didn't consider a joint account! This sounds like the easiest option at this point - will try that first and revert. Thx everyone for the answers so far! posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 9:12 AM on July 18, 2012
I gave up on the article after the first page but when I came in here and saw all the gooey comments I gave it another chance, and of course, now I'm sitting here at work trying to blink the tears back.
I am so grateful for the incredible strides we are making towards acceptance. My wife's parents wouldn't come to our (same-sex) wedding. Now, 8 years later, they come to stay to watch our kids and never miss a birthday or holiday. The world is changing for the better... [more] posted to MetaFilter by widdershinsat 12:36 PM on July 17, 2012
I am STILL kicking myself for not getting one. Matt, I know you mentioned they were a pain to make, but would you be interested in outsourcing the work maybe? I bet there would be quite a few takers, if MeTa comments every time this comes up is any indication... posted to MetaTalk by widdershinsat 11:14 AM on July 12, 2012
I really like this genre too. Strongly second Nikita (the French original) and The Italian Job.
Some other suggestions:
- Red was better than I expected
- The Assignment - not sure why this movie didn't do better; I quite liked it. A much better version of The Jackal story than the Bruce Willis/Richard Gere film
- The Long Kiss Goodbye - OK movie, but made me think a lot about the long-term impact of training for... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 11:03 AM on June 26, 2012
I am so, so sorry. Thank you so much for taking the time to post this and share your love and grief and joy and pain with us.
Like many of the posters, I vividly remember so many of the comments you linked to above. I wonder if your husband had any idea of the impact he has had on so many people and how his story has become part of our stories.
Condolences just doesn't begin to describe the grief we all feel with you.
I found the series to be completely gripping and engrossing, and I'm filled with so much hope for the future. What heroes the writer and her partner are, to have reached this place from where they started! I love that she ends the series on the meaning of Acceptance - both for themselves, but also for others who don't currently share their view.
I poked around the website a bit and read about how they decided to stop spanking their kids; how she started going to... [more] posted to MetaFilter by widdershinsat 11:01 AM on May 15, 2012
Go with the job you are (clearly) excited about, and forget the rest.
This is one of my rules in life, btw. There will always be other opportunities if something doesn't go the way you want, but you won't have to regret passing up your dreamjob. Who cares how safe and stable the other job is, if you'd be miserable every day dreaming of what you gave up? Too many people settle. Don't be one of them unless you absolutely have to. posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 10:04 AM on April 24, 2012
Oh, oh! All the series I'd normally recommend have already been mentioned, except Maze Runner by James Dashner. YA, dystopian future, keeps you guessing all the way, particularly about the romance element - definitely what you're looking for! It is not the best written series I've ever read, but a) you said you were OK w/that, and b) it is definitely engrossing, with break-neck twists and turns that you did not see coming.... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 10:32 AM on April 23, 2012
I second a lot of these recommendations, particularly the Farseer trilogy by Robin Hobb, the Sandman series by Neil Gaiman and anything by Robin McKinley. McKinley is probably my favorite fantasy writer of all time - I love the characters and worlds she creates. I wish she did sequels, but she rarely does, unfortunately.
Quite liked A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness - don't think the sequel is out yet.
Holy crap, 9 1/2 years for me. I slipped in right before the $5 sign-ups, and I'd been trying to get a membership for about 4 months I think, during the lottery period. When I actually got to the sign-up screen I couldn't believe it.
I rarely post these days, and almost exclusively in AskMe. But I read this site every single workday on my lunchbreak. I frequently feel that I should contribute more - give back, somehow - but 99% of the time someone has already said... [more] posted to MetaTalk by widdershinsat 11:18 AM on April 12, 2012
Would it be possible for her kids or grandkids to come up with the $35/mo? It is not an enormous amount, and it would be just as much to their benefit as hers. That way she doesn't have to try to shlep all over town and figure out WiFi and all that, and she can speak freely from the comfort of her home. posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 10:34 AM on April 12, 2012
A bit of a stretch, but The Knife of Never Letting Go by Patrick Ness is set in a society where everyone can hear the thoughts of men and lifestock, so you frequently hear animals' thoughts throughout the book. I read it recently and quite enjoyed it - looking forward to the rest of the trilogy. posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 10:22 AM on April 3, 2012
I think enthusiasm and self-awareness is the best way to make yourself stand out and be remembered. I don't mean over-the-top gushiness, I mean making it really clear to the interviewer how excited you are about what this opportunity would do for you.
Assuming an otherwise even playing field where you all have roughly similar levels of experience and competence, this excitement and self-knowledge of why you want this job will be the thing that people remember.... [more] posted to Ask Metafilter by widdershinsat 10:27 AM on March 26, 2012