So why call it Kristin's List if the marketing and public relations agency that is behind it doesn't even make an effort to flesh out the Kristin character? That's what I don't get about this whole sad fiasco.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 6:01 PM on July 21, 2008

Congratulations on a well-chosen first post 7 1/2 years after you paid your $5.

I signed up less than 7 1/2 years ago and I didn't have to pay a thing. Where is your god now, eh?!
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 4:04 AM on July 17, 2008

Does he have amazing powers of emotional recuperation, or does he have morphine and "don't kill your wife pills"? My money is on the latter.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 2:52 PM on July 15, 2008

Some say that Abraham Lincoln was a hero, others point to Harriet Tubman, Martin Luthor King, Geronimo, Patrick Henry and George Washington. But Tony Snow proved himself to be a true American hero in a class above all of them. A man who believed that telling the truth, the whole truth, painful though it may be for the public to hear, was the most important part of being the public spokesman for what might be the most transparent and law-abiding government in the history of North America. When... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 11:05 AM on July 12, 2008

Oh ho, more cowbell! Boy, that never gets old.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 1:29 AM on July 12, 2008

You've been around here long enough to know that this is a self-link as you are apparently Tom Watson, the head of the Power of Information Taskforce. It would be better placed in Projects.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 11:51 PM on July 5, 2008

But I'm glad you're encouraging the government to make data openly available in standard formats. Hopefully that will spread to other governments.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 11:54 PM on July 5, 2008

Sen. Helms was a lighthouse keeper singing a beautiful song of liberty, equality, and justice while he worked through the night to guide us past these rocky shores and shoals of immoral, silvery fish. His light, now sadly extinguished, leaves us all racing dangerously towards unknown cliffs and sandbars that will strand us and leave us desperate for salvation. Now we are left with nary a Coleman lantern to guide us through these strange waters, and the world is worse off for it. Godspeed, Sir... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 8:39 AM on July 4, 2008

On the other, I think a certain amount of respect is due when people die.

I totally agree with you. I think a lot of us forget that death is an accomplishment that few achieve, an accomplishment so strong and brave that it negates the fact that the person who managed to pull off such a feat was a complete shitbag undeserving of respect or being pissed upon while on fire while alive.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 11:39 AM on July 4, 2008

I thought cmonkey's first quote was serious when I first read it. That's all

I just like writing over-the-top memorials to people who don't much deserve it. Sorry for the confusion.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 12:44 PM on July 4, 2008

4 times still isn't enough dying for that fucker.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 8:34 AM on July 4, 2008

But thanks for the heads up boss.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 8:34 AM on July 4, 2008

So it's a massage with a handjob? I can get the same effect by jerking off in one of those massage chairs at the airport. Much, much cheaper, too.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 4:33 AM on July 4, 2008

This is the perfect musical accompaniment for this post.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 2:53 AM on June 23, 2008

This, people, this is what gay marriage causes.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 8:23 AM on June 20, 2008

How do they verify that someone really works where they claim they do? Emailing a contributor at a work address is not likely to be popular, so what's to prevent me from signing up claiming to work for a competitor and then talking about how the toilets are always clogged in the mens room and all of the offices smell like mildew?
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 1:32 PM on June 16, 2008

Yes, they should.

Also, MEMO TO MICHAEL REAGAN: YOU HAVE A FACE FOR RADIO AND A VOICE FOR NOT BEING ON RADIO. STOP BEING GROSS WITH YOUR AUDIBLE SPIT ON THE AIRWAVES.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 12:04 PM on June 14, 2008

Many rappers are nominally Christian

Makes sense. The Abrahamic god is definitely a god that likes cappin' motherfuckers who disrespect him.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 11:50 AM on June 13, 2008

Jeez, if I could earn over 82,400USD I'd throw caution to the wind and happily fork over tax due on the extra. Just wishful thinking on my part though, I'm afraid.

I don't think that chuckdarwin has talked to a real tax professional about ex-pat tax issues, because mine has told me that I will be highly unlikely to ever pay taxes to the US government on top of my foreign taxes, even though I make more than $82,400 per year. Something about dual-taxation agreements.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 3:36 AM on June 11, 2008

cmonkey, are you on about this treaty?

I'm not on about anything, nor do I know anything about the particulars of US-UK tax laws. I was just saying that a) being an American abroad and making more than $82,400 does not automatically mean that you have to pay two governments lots of money and b) if you talk to a competent tax advisor familiar with the tax system in both countries, and they really don't cost all that much, you will end up in a perfectly acceptable place.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 11:00 AM on June 11, 2008

I just know that if there is a Hell, I am going to end up locked in a room with this boring twit for all eternity.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 1:10 AM on June 9, 2008

The tragic thing is, after the Iraq debacle, any kind of intervention (never likely to be invoked help black Africans anyway sadly, except by the UK in Sierra Leone) is so out of fashion that tyrants the world over basically can do whatever they damn well please to their own people.

It fell out of fashion when some American troops were shot down in Mogadishu, predating "the Iraq debacle" by about a decade. Since then, we've seen genocide,... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 10:17 AM on June 6, 2008

Don't try to wash your hands of it by vilifying your president, South Africa's, or even Mugabe himself. The fact that he's still doing what he's doing to Zimbabweans is the world's fault.

We're all guilty.

It's pretty obvious that every single industrialized nation, regardless of what political party is in power, either takes a cynical view towards Africa or one of selfish indifference. It's also quite clear that voting... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 11:46 AM on June 6, 2008

cmonkey - other than making you feel better about your inaction, what does your post do?

I'm neither inactive nor feeling better about my impotance about stopping genocide. Other than making you feel like a self-congratulatory cock-about-the-internet, what does your post do?
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 12:45 PM on June 6, 2008

And now we have a glimmering, charismatic leader surfing a swell of popular support.

I may not have read this exact story before. But I can't ever remember a story like this one ending well.

Are you seriously comparing Obama to Jesus? Because that is way out of line.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 11:42 PM on June 3, 2008

So, on the positive side it doesn't appear to be a keffiyah to me. On the minus side it does make her look French.

You decide which is worse.

ho ho, a french joke! Cutting edge humor over at the Jawa Report, be careful.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 10:29 AM on May 28, 2008

If I may ask, which part was that? In the part that I live in, graffiti is everywhere, beggars and obviously poor people are common, and vandalism and theft are real problems. And it is worse in the large cities like Cologne or Berlin. Coming from a small (120k) city in southwestern Indiana, it was a real culture shock for me. I get a general impression that the middle and lower middle classes are better off in Germany than in the US, but the things you describe are much more in view... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 6:39 AM on May 18, 2008

This was willful - stop giving the Bush Administration the benefit of the doubt. Is this an impeachable offense? Someone call Nancy. Pelosi, not Drew.

Calling upon a Democrat to do something is usually just as effective as calling on a fictional character to do something. Sorry :-(
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 1:03 PM on April 30, 2008

Ooo. Auto-godwin. Nice.

What? No it isn't. I don't see any comparisons to Nazis or Hitler, just a mention of fascism, and not all fascists are Nazis.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 3:02 AM on April 29, 2008

Your internet fishbulb music website or whatever it is called does not work in Opera and I wish to receive no further communications regarding it. Good day, sir.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 5:38 AM on April 28, 2008

My community recycles plastic, paper, and metal. None of which poses a particularly serious risk when sent to the landfill.

You mean aside from the problem of running out of landfills?
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 9:30 AM on April 22, 2008

I didn't read the comic book, but M.A.S.K was awesome.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 11:14 PM on April 17, 2008

German Astrology Geek

What does astrology have to do with anything?
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 1:22 AM on April 16, 2008

Oh how I wish for an ecological mercenary squad armed to the teeth who could go and execute every single motherfucker at the Sochi Institute of Medical Primatology.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 10:49 PM on April 14, 2008

I am literally Laughing Out Loud at this amusing April Fools Day stunt the Internet cooked up a mere ten days ago. What will they think of next? Perhaps something involving an unlikely merger between two rival technology corporations? Hah, that shall be the day, indeed! Or perhaps an amusing Four-Oh-Four message! Or perhaps something involving Google announcing something outrageously inventive! Oh, how the tears of laughter shall stream from our childrens' faces as we smile upon them with... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 11:32 AM on April 10, 2008

I believe that everyone is forgetting Mr. Cool Ice.

That's because this is a thread about bad tattoos, not totally awesome tattoos so he doesn't have much of a place here.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 5:10 AM on April 8, 2008

I'm no inking expert, but that adam's apple tattoo that stunt linked to looks suspiciously like magic marker.

The outlines on the palm tree look right for a recent tattoo as the scab is forming, so I believe it.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 10:43 AM on April 8, 2008

Do you really think that being a Democrat means that someone can't be a complete shitbag?

Because I have a list I could post.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 10:06 AM on April 7, 2008

At last. At last.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 8:34 AM on April 1, 2008

I'd like to see a group of Vietnam vets form an organization dedicated to eradicating the further influence of that stupid Baby Boomer generation on our national politics.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 6:11 AM on March 31, 2008

I don't get it. Why on earth would your mind even go there? Do you think the Lippannzer Stallions are abused? Do you think the dancing walrus was taught through beatings? Why, then, presume that of the elephant trainers?

It's difficult not to immediately get concerned once you've read up on the cruel shit that circuses and those asshole trainers who terrorize chimps into "laughing" in television commercials do.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 12:03 AM on March 31, 2008

fuck this guy and his "journalism." next time, break his fingers so he can't type this crap up.
posted by mr_book at 1:35 AM on March 25 [+] [!]

Oh look, an internet tough guy, how novel.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 12:11 AM on March 25, 2008

This post reminded me that I had been meaning to track down where my old bullies are. As far as the internet can tell me, they've done nothing of note since they graduated high school. That's somewhat satisfying. Kids: drop out of high school, it's the best decision you'll ever make.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 9:29 AM on March 24, 2008

Just tie a garbage bag around your head and lie down. It's easy...

It's probably safest to combine this method with a lot of sleeping pills, so you won't attempt to remove the bag in a panic over your suffocation.

Yes, I read alt.suicide.holiday a lot as a teenager.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 1:34 AM on March 22, 2008

I was intending to get around to posting an AskMetafilter question looking to find some good programming weblogs, and here one is. Thanks, ortho, you read my mind.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 12:56 AM on March 16, 2008

boing boing a day or two ago

Who gives a flying fuck?

I really really really hope this story is real.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 5:03 AM on March 15, 2008

If not that, I'd bet it's a viral for SOMETHING. The thing that gets me is the zoom in on the gnome. How man cell phone users would immediately zoom in with the phone? How many cell phone users even know that their phone zooms in?

It probably is a viral, but the video camera on my phone zooms in and out using the same navigation buttons I use to move around the menu, so it's not exactly a hidden feature.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 5:43 AM on March 15, 2008

Vaccines don't poison children, John McCain poisons children. I'm happy to have cleared that up.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 8:45 AM on March 6, 2008

The German and Czech accents were terrible but I guess her Seattle one was all right.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 8:45 AM on March 2, 2008

My sole experience with Science Fairdom was a volcano made out of paper mache and baking soda and vinegar and when it erupted it wiped out a little village I built at the foot of the mountain.

I don't think I even took it to the science fair, I just liked wiping out the little village over and over again. Kids these days, my god.
posted to MetaFilter by cmonkey at 11:11 PM on February 20, 2008